Okay, this is a story out of left field for my usual writing. Let me lay down the ground rules. It is crack, plain and simple. I'm just writing this for a bit of fun. Now, it can stay like this as a one-shot, or I can make it a full story, filled with crack goodness. What you need to do to make this a story: Enjoy!
Essentially, it will involve the entire DxD story, but will come with a twist. If you don't figure out what the twist is from this chapter, then you just need me to write more for you until you do.
Review, favourite and follow and/or support me on pat reon and/or join the DxD discord chat where the idea for this story came from.
This is the link: discord. gg/xEApPAS
(Also, if you feel like having some fun, if/when you do join, say "Praise SSJ3 Kyuubi Gohan!")
SSJ3 Kyuubi Gohan.
Disclaimer – I don't own anything from the High School DxD anime/manga/light novel. All I own are my original characters and plot twists.
'Talking'
"Thinking"
'Ddraig talking and Sacred Gear sounds'
"Ddraig thinking"
*expression*
"Pailingual and telepathy"
Flashback
Chapter 1 – Strip for me
"This moment… I have been waiting for this moment my entire life…" Thought Issei Hyoudou, the current Red Dragon Emperor.
Right in front of Issei, was the greatest sight he had ever seen. A girl was stripping, all for him. This wasn't just any girl either. It was a perfect ten. The long wavy blonde hair, those seductive red eyes, the ridiculously hot business suit. Right now, that suit was being disposed of, right in front of Issei's eyes. A normal person might feel embarrassed, for context, this wasn't a private strip show, this was in front of thousands of people with even more viewing at home. Children, women, men, angels, devils, demons, everything. Issei didn't care one lick though.
'Pailingual!' Shouted Issei, instantly reading the thoughts of his stripper's breasts.
"Hey! The oppai over there! What are you going to do next?" Asked Issei, with his unique ability. "Next… I'm going to take off the buttons of my blouse. One by one." Replied the breasts.
Now, these breasts weren't just any breasts, they belonged to the bishop of Sairaorg Bael, Coriana Andrealphus and this wasn't being done in a bedroom. Oh no, as mentioned before, it was in front of a huge crowd, in the middle of a rating game with pride and ambition on the line. That was okay with Issei though, because pride and ambition meant nothing in the face of a beautiful girl stripping for you while her oppai guided you through it. Issei would have given his other arm for this scene.
"Issei, what are you doing? You heard what her breasts said, right? Then prepare for the next attack!" Said Rias, speaking directly to Issei's mind.'I can't! Because her oppai are telling me what's she's going to strip next!' Exclaimed Issei, never tearing his eyes away from the scene before him and letting his mind only focus on the feast being presented exclusively for his eyes.
Those long beautiful legs. Her enormous breasts! Her hips! Her erotic underwear. It was breathtaking, truly a magnificent sight to behold.
"Next… next she will take of her bra right, revealing her enormous oppai…" Thought Issei.
The woman… she put her hands on her pants…
"WHAT?" Shouted Issei internally.
"Oi, breasts over there! What are you doing?" Raged Issei. "Since Oppai Dragon likes breasts the best, they must come last to fully build up the Oppai Dragon's desire." Explained the breasts.
The daring underwear of Sairaorg's only female bishop came off with a whisper of sound. The crowd watched on, some in awe, some in embarrassment and Issei, in raging arousal.
"Hey, Ddraig, you know what is coming next, right?" Asked Issei.
'Oh don't remind me, haven't I put up with enough already? Now there is someone doing it for you without you even asking.' Wailed Ddraig.
'Oh Oppai Dragon. You know what comes next right?' Teased Coriana, clasping her bra from behind.
Issei's nostrils expanded as he took in a deep breath, eyes wide and unblinking.
*click* *poof*
The bra had come off and dropped to the floor. There in front of Issei's eyes was a magnificent feast. Her breasts were magnificent, in fact, Issei thought they were bigger than Rias'.
"Hey, oppai over there, what are your measurements?" Asked Issei. "100-56-92cm." Replied the breasts. "Wait… are you saying you have bigger breasts than Rias, a waist smaller than Kuroka and wider hips than Akeno." Asked Issei, breath catching in his throat. "I don't know, maybe." Replied the breasts teasingly.
'Blond Bishop Beauty Boosted Balance Breaker!' Bellowed the Boosted Gear, before Issei transformed.The traditional red armour formed over Issei, except now a massive canon was strapped to Issei's back, with two smaller circular chargers at the base of the canon, which started to glow yellow.
'Bishop lady! You are going to be mine!' Bawled Issei in desire, before an attack similar to a Dragon Shot was launched, only two hundred times the size of the original pea shaped blast, which expanded to fill entire magical dome erected to contain the fight.
[Combatant Sairaorg's [Bishop] retires]
-line break-
Afterwards the battles continued, Gasper fought hard to allow Xenovia to win after the enemy tricked her with a curse. Akeno was beaten by the enemy queen through the use of her ability, Hole. Next, Kiba, Rossweisse and Xenovia tried to take on Sairaorg and were all defeated, though they managed to take out Sairaorg's right arm, causing him to use his phoenix tear. Issei almost annihilated Sairaorg's queen after that, strip show or not, his friends were being defeated and his rage was unfathomable. It was not to be though, with Sairaorg retiring his queen before impact. After that, Sairaorg proposed a team battle, but it didn't matter to Issei.
'Rias, there is something I want to say before the fight. Your servants are wonderful.' Said Sairaorg, but Issei wasn't focusing on that.
'Oi, Sairaorg, let's make this interesting. Me against you. If I lose, Rias will retire, but if you lose, you give me your bishop, the one who stripped for me.' Said Issei boldly.
'Hmm? My peerage are my close friends. I may have employed a tactic to try and beat you, but I won't give away my close friends like actual chess pieces.' Said Sairaorg.
'You don't have to worry about that. This Oppai Dragon loves oppai, I would treat her like a queen. I can explain more to you why I need her later, but if you are so confident in your abilities, then you don't have to worry about that, since you will beat me here and now, right?' Retorted Issei.
'Haha, Issei Hyoudou, you are an interesting individual. Very well, I accept.' Said Sairaorg, causing Rias to sigh.
'Oh Sairaorg, you don't realise what you've done… and this one actually stripped for him without him asking.' Said Rias, cradling her head in her hands.
'Then let's go Ddraig.' Said Issei.
'Blond Bishop Beauty Boosted Balance Breaker!' Bellowed the Boosted Gear, before Issei transformed.
'I can only hold this form for one minute without her in front of me, so come at me with your strongest attack, even with your pawn, or we won't ever see it in action. One hit will decide this all!' Roared Issei, as his chargers lit up.
'My lion! King of Nemea! You, who has been called King of Lions! Answer my howl and turn into my armour!' Said Sairaorg, as his pawn turned into golden armour which covered his form.
'Here it comes Sairaorg! You know that saying the name of an attack makes it stronger so here it comes! Oppai Obliteration: Super Sexy Striptease Style!' Roared Issei, as a spiralling Dragon Shot like attack burst out of his canon, before his two chargers at the base launched a similar, but smaller beam which wrapped around the main one, all of which were slowly expanding.
Sairaorg gathered all his energy to his fist and punched the beam and held it at bay… for two seconds, before he was utterly annihilated.
[Sairaorg Bael loses. He retires. This is the end of the game. Rias Gremory Team's victory!]