A/N: Back at it with another one! Enjoy!

Disclaimer: With the exception of the OC, I do not own any of these characters.

Steffy POV

I felt him drifting away the minute he told me the news. I wasn't being insecure or paranoid, either. I knew the signs. I'd seen them before.

I told him I wanted to get married. I knew he had been disappointed that I had wanted to wait a while after he proposed.

Then, he told me Hope was pregnant.

And my heart sank.

I couldn't let it show though, because I knew he was happy even though it was complicated.

And I had to acknowledge that every baby is a blessing.

It hurt like hell, but I was supportive. I understood that this was a happy moment for him and I promised I would be there for him, but I saw the distant look in his eyes.

Though he had promised forgiveness and reassured me that his decision to make a life with me was not solely about Kelly, I knew that I couldn't be 100% sure of anything with him.

I would never be able to, because he always had another option in Hope, and now he was going to have another family with Hope.

When he decided we should wait to get married until things were less complicated, I knew what he was really saying.

He didn't want to be wrapped up in a marriage with me so just in case he got swayed to Hope's side, it would be a clean break.

And I smiled through it, promised to be there when he was ready, but I was tired.

I was tired to the bone, of everything.

The continuous ping pong match between me and Hope was exhausting, and it resulted in almost equal amounts of pain as it did joy.

The single beautiful gift from any of this torment was Kelly, and the thought of her knowing her father, and having his constant presence in her life for a short few months, before he disappeared and became a part time parent brought me a pain unlike any I'd ever felt.

But I kept faith.

I talked myself down from every ledge, but Hope came over, spouting off about her loyalty versus mine, her better character against my less than stellar track record. I would be disappointed when he chose her, and she was just trying to prepare me.

That was her argument.

To top it all off, Bill made an appearance. The pest that never seemed to leave, making sure I remembered every time Liam had been flaky, and disloyal, and indecisive, and how much it had hurt each time.

He painted a picture perfectly in tune with Liam's behaviour, his indecision would mean that he would be running between the two of us and our children their whole lives.

And it broke me, because I couldn't even call him a liar.

Nothing he was saying was untrue.

It was exactly what had happened before, and probably what would happen again, but this time, it wouldn't just be me he hurt.

I got rid of Bill, practically shoving him out the door, collapsing into a mess of tears and anxiety on my couch.

When Kelly's cries sounded on the baby monitor, I picked up my beautiful daughter.

As I rocked her back to sleep, I stared down at her little face, the long dark lashes brushing against her cheeks, her cute pursed little mouth. She was so innocent, she hadn't yet been hardened by any of the obstacles life would throw at her, and I was determined to keep her that way.

I wondered what would be best for her.

A life of disappointment from her father, or simply wondering about a father she never knew and didn't remember?

It wasn't until late that night that I made my decision.

Liam walked in after I'd already eaten dinner and Kelly was down for the night, or at least a couple hours.

"Hey." He sounded surprised to see me, in our home.

"Hi." I said.

"I was at Forrester." He said. "Katie and Thorne are worried about the threats on the Hope for the Future website."

What that really meant was he spoke to Katie and Thorne for a few minutes, and then spent the rest of the day with Hope, who if she was half as fired up as when she'd been here, had spent the day lobbying for him to leave me, using everything in her arsenal, which meant bashing me.

I didn't bring that up though.

"Any headway finding the person?" I asked.

"No." He said. "And I don't understand why anyone would want to hurt Hope."

She's perfect, and amazing. He didn't say it, but I knew he was thinking it, if his expression was any indication or how fired up he was.

"Yeah, she was over today." I said, watch some of that expression leave his face.

"Yeah, she told me." He muttered.

"Of course, she did." I rolled my eyes, which lit Liam's fuse.

"It wasn't like that, Steffy." He said. "She said it was pretty civil."

I laughed. Of course, it was, Hope didn't need to raise her voice to deliver her snide remarks.

He scowled.

I was treading on thin ice. Hope was above fault in his eyes, but I didn't care. I was over caring.

"Let me guess." I smiled, but it was anything but kind. "She poured out her heart to you, which really means, she painted the perfect future you guys could have, and reminded you about my betrayal and what an awful person I am, right?"

He stared at me with his sad puppy dog eyes.

"And tell me if I get this wrong, but you sat there smiling with her about your beautiful future and stayed completely silent when she tore me down."

"It wasn't like that, Steffy." He said, reaching for my hand, but he wouldn't sway me with sweet words and soft touches.

"I don't believe you." I pulled my hands away. "Tell the truth, Liam. Don't worry, it won't hurt me, it's not anything she didn't say when she was here."

He sighed. "She just mentioned Bill, and yes she did say something a lack of character on your part and mentioned that I'd never have to worry about that with her." He stared down at his feet.

"And you didn't say anything." It wasn't a question, so he didn't answer. I didn't need him to though, I knew he'd said nothing in my defence.

It still hurt though, and I felt the tears build up in my eyes at what I was about to do.

"Why are you with me, Liam, if you think I'm such a lesser person than you and Hope?"

"I don't think that." He knelt in front of me, taking my hands, grasping them in his, and I let him, because it would be the last time he had to comfort me this way. I wouldn't let him do this to me anymore.

"Yeah, you do." I sniffed. "Because a person who doesn't believe those things, who loves someone, would never listen to someone else tear that person down."

He didn't have an answer for me, and I laughed through my tears, because what had I been fighting for all these years? I convinced myself that Liam was the guy for me, when really, he was just the guy who hurt me.

I deserved better.

I'd kill two birds with one stone. Liam wouldn't hurt me, Bill would leave me alone, and Kelly would be at a safe distance from all the pain that surrounded Liam Spencer.

I took of the engagement ring, placing it in his hand.

"What are you doing, Steffy?" Liam asked, genuinely upset. That's what always confused me, that he could love me and not defend me, that he could want to be with me and Hope, that he could love us both.

And for the first time in my life I was beginning to realize, there had to be someone he loved more, and I didn't think it was me.

"I'm not going to marry you." I said, watching as tears filled his eyes. I didn't know if they were for me, or because he feared not being there for Kelly. A loud, cynical part of me thought that he was going to stay with me for the nine months Hope was pregnant and then leave us for the new baby.

It didn't matter now.

It wasn't his decision to make.

Hope loved to remind me that Liam's decisions were his, and he got to decide who he wanted to be with.

I always thought that was so 1800s because it was my decision too, who I wanted to be with, and as of right now, for the first time in almost 10 years, I didn't want to be with Liam.

"This isn't an ultimatum or a trick. I realize that life is very complicated for you right now, possibly more than ever. You've never been able to choose between me and Hope, and I let it go. Did it hurt? Yes, it did. Every. Single. Time. But I was strong enough to handle it." He frowned, shaking his head, trying to place the ring back in my hands, but I closed them into fists. "I know first-hand what it's like to have a father that loves two women and can't decide, and I won't do that to Kelly or Hope's baby. So, I've made the decision."

"Steffy, please don't." He cried, his tears getting caught in his scruff. "I just need time."

"This isn't a ploy, Liam. I'm not trying to force your decision, because I don't care what it is anymore." I shrugged. "I know you'll always be there for Kelly because you're a good man, and you don't have to be with me to do that."

I removed myself from him, putting some distance between us. I was oddly drawn to the fireplace, staring at the pictures of us, trying to soak in those small moments of happiness. They were beautiful, but mom and dad had beautiful moments too, and moments where they were miserable and moments when he wasn't there.

Somehow, I'd found myself in the same situation, trapped in a never-ending circle with a man who loved two women.

I wanted better for Kelly. I would give her better.

"It's going to be okay." I said, more for my benefit than his. "I prepared myself for this almost my whole pregnancy. I was ready to do this by myself and, I still am. She's too young to understand what's going on, and you'll still be in her life. I'll FaceTime you anything important that happens when you're not there, and you'll have her on the certain days when she's older and on solid food. I'll get a lawyer and we can have a custody agreement drawn up that works for both of us."

"You've given this a lot of thought." Liam stared down at my ring in his hand.

"I have." I said. "Now I realize you don't have a place of your own right now, and I've decided that you can stay here. It's not ideal, but there's a new budding fashion house in Paris that my dad and I really want to partner up with—" Liam shook his head, determined eyes meeting mine.

"You can't take her." He said.

I sighed. "We need space and time apart. My mom has been desperate to meet her, and this partnership would be huge for Forrester. It would just be a couple weeks, Liam, enough time for you to find a place of your own, and for me to close this deal."

He shook his head. "No."

"She's still breastfeeding, Liam. I can't leave her here with you and I can't stay."

"Yes, you can." He said.

"No, I can't." I cried. "I'll only be gone however long it takes to close this deal, and then I'll be back. I'll FaceTime you every day, and send you pictures, but this—" I sighed, wiping at my face. "this is what we need to do to move on from this, okay?"

"No, it's not okay." He yelled in hushed whispers.

I shrugged. "It's just the way it has to be for now."

I turned, heading to our room. "You can take the spare bedroom." I said before shutting myself in, sliding down the door, tears overwhelming, drowning me.

It could only get better from here, right?

A/N: I promise it will only get better from here, for Steffy. Totally Steffy-centric fanfiction, and also for the sake of this story, Kelly is 1 month old right now, I'm not sure how old she is in the actual show right now.