Here are my thoughts; history repeats itself. It always has and it always will. There is no avoiding human nature. So why did I bother trying?

It was like the Titan War, part two. For a few days, people were like, oh my gods, Nico, thanks for saving our asses and being a total bro! But then aftewards they just went oh. hey Nico. And not long after, they said nothing at all.

There were the three days in the infirmary. Which wasn't awful, technically speaking. I was given enough space that I wasnt choking, and no one bugged me much.

I saw plenty of Will, and my stomach kept that queasy nervous feeling that doesn't even bother me, whatever it is supposed to mean.

But still. It felt lacking. I felt empty. Maybe it was because I hadn't so much as held my sword those days. Maybe I felt stuffy.

So when I finally was freed, given only the instructions to 'be careful not to reopen those scratches on your arm,' my first item of business was to go to the training center.

Holding my sword warily, I took a deep breath. It was surprisingly hard, getting back to this, after knowing I've been lazing about. After knowing my skills have deteriorated.

But still, I went at it. And I kept going for a while, at least until I heard someone comment, "isn't it a little soon to practice, so soon after getting out of the infirmary?"

I instantly whipped around, sheathing my sword. Before me stood Jason, grinning, though grief still was prominent in his eyes. I had to admire his strength; he was much closer to Leo than I was, and still he was able to smile. Everyone was able to fight through their grief, whenever they got it.

Why couldn't I?

I shook the thoughts aside. "Hey, Jason," I greeted, offering a small nod.

"Hey Nico. I stopped by to let you know I was going to head to Camp Jupiter with Piper today to get started on my project. I'll be back in- oh, two weeks? Just before school starts to wrap up the summer, and I'll be back off to California for school. So. I'll see you soon!"

I smiled weakly. "Yeah. See ya." I watched his retreating back for a little bit, and then turned to resume practice.

I practiced all the way through lunch, something I didn't realize until another voice called out, asking "Nico? How long have you been practicing?"

I turned to see a concerned Percy, holding hands with an equally worried Annabeth. I felt a yank of jealousy. No, not over Percy. That was over. But I wished I had someone like they do. And that I wasn't hated for it.

"Um." I paused. I couldn't lie. It was too late. "Since eleven thirty."

"Take a break," Annabeth suggested. "That's not healthy."

I shrugged, looking away. "I just. Hadn't practiced in a while. I guess I should get back to my cabin. I can practice later." They nodded, and gave me a smile, and walked away.

Like everyone always does.

I wilted a little, and trudged back to my cabin, avoiding the few gazes who stared, and all too aware of the wide gap around me as people went out of their way to avoid me.

I kept my head low and slipped into the dark Hades cabin. Being cooped up inside just added to my frustration.

I paced the small building in furious, fast-moving laps, scowling in a restlessness I couldn't pinpoint the cure to.

A frown was prominent on my face, even when the horn blew for dinner and I went to eat.

After eating what I could (though it was true I couldn't eat much), I swiftly stood and strode away, deciding to take brisk laps around the camp instead to release my pent up energy.

Walking through camp, I kept a hand on my sword and a small scowl on my face. I wasn't sure what had me so restless, so angry, so wound up, but it happened. And now I couldn't sit. I couldn't stay still. I couldn't listen to the buzzing of conversation.

I growled in frustration, scratching furiously at my scalp. My limbs were tense. Suddenly, the horn blew, and I remembered; capture the flag. I released an uninterested grunt, but attendance was mandatory so I headed towards the woods.

As it turned out, I was on the blue team, which, this week, was led by the Aphrodite cabin, and we were against the Poseidon cabin, leading the red team (of course- what other color team would there be?).

Realizing that the Aphrodite kid who had been put in charge had been talking, I zoned back in with a bored scowl. "And. Uh- um. H- Hades cabin w- will also be t- taking border patrol," the guy stammered out, glancing at me fearfully.

I rolled my eyes at his totally terrified expression at having to- gasp!- speak to me like an actual human being! At least border patrol resulted in me fighting some kids. I'd hopefully feel better afterwards.

I exhaled in boredom, but thank the gods when it's suddenly time to start, and I was standing by the stream, cracking my fingers and waiting for action.

There's almost no action all night. The most I'm given are three Hermes kids who I knock out pretty swiftly.

In fact, I don't even see someone take or deliver a flag. A horn blows, signalling a game won, and I go to the rendezvous to discover Clarrise lifting the red team's flag triumphantly over her cheering cabinmates. I sighed quietly, not caring much. I didn't do much.

I found my gaze wandering to my left, to where the red team was mourning. Percy looks crestfallen- and really, he was a great strategist, so I'm shocked Clarrise beat him, though he did focus mostly on solo or small group strategies. Around him are the Athena cabin, the Apollo cabin, and some others.

I found my eyes locked on a blond medic, and when I realized it, I flushed and snapped my head away.

I supposed it was best to celebrate with my cabin, so I joined the crowd. The demigods around me glanced at me nervously, gave a small smile, and shifted away. I felt my shoulders slump.

We were all living the same way. Lots of people avoiding me. I didn't want to be avoided. At this point, it was just a fact of life.