They're still in Kusa.

That's the best he can do.

Minato isn't sure how far they flashed, or if that Iwa nin's last jutsu had any effect on them at all, but Obito is not doing well and Kakashi's newly-mismatched eyes are looking wild. Rin is the calmest, looking around their surroundings and chewing on a soldier pill, hands glowing over Obito's chest. Minato grabs a cloak from his pack, more grateful than ever for Kushina's seal of expansion, and drapes it around Obito, fastening it around his neck.

"Kakashi, can you deactivate your Sharingan?" Minato asks, ignoring the inherent wrongness of that statement. Kakashi shouldn't have the Sharingan at all, Obito shouldn't be lying pale and broken on foreign soil while Rin fights to keep him alive.

Kakashi clearly tries, squinting both eyes, but grimaces when nothing happens. Minato assesses the situation. Sharingan clearly marks him out as Konoha-born, which isn't something you want to be in Iwa territory.

"Do you have enough chakra for a decent henge?" Minato asks. "Even just one that hides your eyes and hair colour would be enough."

Kakashi answers with a little huff, shaken but still cocky. He flashes a hand-seal and when he blinks, two dark eyes blink back. His hair is pale blond, which doesn't suit him, but will have to do for now.

"Rin, you can either use henge to hide your clan markings or put bandages over them." Minato tells her.

Rin barely looks up from her fierce battle with Obito's injuries, "Bandages. Healing requires too much chakra to support any kind of drain."

Minato flicks a glance at Kakashi, who immediately gets to work looking for the right size bandages in Minato's pack. It's unsettling, seeing a compliant Kakashi and a coolly-competent Rin. Almost as strange as seeing Obito without a smile.

As Kakashi carefully applies the bandages to Rin's face, Minato makes a decision. Not one he likes, but a necessary one.

"We need to get Obito to a team of medic-nin." He says, holding a hand up when Kakashi immediately starts to protest. "Rin is skilled, but even she isn't capable of reversing this level of damage on her own. According to our map, the nearest clinic is in Kusagakure. We can't risk detection, so we'll have to sneak in rather than try to gain access from the main entrance. We'll go over the walls and bribe the medics. Any questions?"

"Should we be doing this?" Kakashi asks, his voice low.

"We absolutely should not. We never enter an enemy village without express orders, because we could get caught and cause a diplomatic incident, start a war, or be used as hostages against our home village." Minato says cheerfully.

"But we're doing it anyway." Kakashi says, sounding shockingly unbothered. "For Obito."

"For Obito." Minato agrees.

"What if we're caught?" Kakashi says, eyes drilling into the side of Minato's head. "Protocol dictates we cannot be in enemy territory without explicit permission from the Hokage, because, as you said, we might start a war."

Minato smiles, "We're already at war, Kakashi."

Still, Kakashi presses on, relentless, "Protocol dictates we leave Obito behind if detected."

Rin looks up, her face wretched. She takes a deep breath and focuses on Obito once more, though her hands are shaking now.

"You're a jounin now, Kakashi. What call would you make?" Minato asks. It doesn't matter what Kakashi replies, as Minato is team leader for this mission, but he's curious. Kakashi seems different in some unquantifiable way.

Kakashi glares up at him, his eyes burning with intensity, "I would never leave a comrade behind."

Minato turns to hide his smile, forming a henge of his own, "I know. Now, let's get going before Iwa catches up with us."

"Let them try." Kakashi mutters darkly, a sentiment Rin echoes.

Minato's smile turns sharp.

Let them try, indeed.

xxxxxxxx

Slipping into Kusa is easy. Bizarrely so. Kusagakure is Iwa territory, and Iwa is at all-out war with the biggest Hidden Village in the world. Kusa should be on alert for trouble, especially given the Kannabi Bridge's recent destruction. Instead, Kusa is almost… merry. The people don't appear downtrodden, as you would expect from citizens of an occupied nation. There are shinobi of all ages here, looking healthy and fit for service, milling around the village instead of manning battlefields.

Strange.

Still, Minato doesn't dwell on it, just thanks whatever force is looking out for them today, then finds a back-alley clinic that's willing to trade medical aid for some of his emergency funds. Rin stays with Obito, ostensibly to help the Kusa medics heal him, but also to keep an eye on them. Seeking aid from the enemy is never a good idea, even if you go under the radar, like they are. If their identities are discovered, it won't end well.

Kakashi wanted to stay with Rin and help with Obito, but Minato persuaded him that splitting their forces to gain information would be more prudent. Even this new version of Kakashi, with his sudden interest in loyalty, still cares about doing what's best for the mission – provided it doesn't mean abandoning a teammate. Minato is glad he's finally learned that lesson, but wishes it could have been taught a little more kindly. Kakashi's henge does little to hide the wild look in his eyes, the restless energy in his stance that marks him out as prey to every predator around.

"The map is wrong." Kakashi declares, breaking Minato's reverie. He's glaring at the paper, keeping his Sharingan closed as he takes in the map's details. He must be struggling to parse all the new information Obito's eye offers him.

Minato peers over his shoulder. They're both crouched in a tree, higher than most would consider checking for unwanted visitors. The branches are thin enough that they need to keep a chakra-enhanced grip on the trunk to keep from breaking through and plummeting to the ground. He still remembers the first time Obito and Rin had to learn to walk up trees. Kakashi already knew, and arrogantly leapt past Obito as he attempted his shaky climb. Obito had fallen, thanks to Kakashi's rough shove, and Minato had snatched him out of the air.

I should have scolded him more, Minato thinks, eyeing the shaken boy at his side, I shouldn't have tried to laugh it off. He should have learned camaraderie in a safe place. I should have been more of a teacher, less of a friend.

As he scans the map, he quickly notices what Kakashi means. There's more trees marked on the map than exist before them, and the river ends further back than the inked lines indicate. As he examines the horizon, more and more things leap out to him as subtly off. The map could be outdated, since Konoha nin rarely find cause to cross Kusa's borders, but these discrepancies are far too stark to be the result of old info.

Information this inaccurate is either the result of severe inadequacy or deliberate sabotage. Minato sighs, resting his chin on Kakashi's head and ignoring his annoyed attempts to swat him away. Can't one thing go right on this mission? Minato thinks gloomily.

Just then, he feels the distant echo of powerful chakra. He slumps, knocking his head on the tree trunk. Not exactly what I meant, universe.

Kakashi has stiffened, crouching down, "Two – no, three shinobi – less than a mile east."

"You've been working on your sensory abilities," Minato says, the praise coming out flat and tired. He longs for an end to this mission, and something tells him the three distinct chakra signals won't bring it.

Minato's henge is based on a civilian he once knew. A kind man in his forties, with a drab appearance and unremarkable features. His hair was mud-brown, his eyes always blinking owlishly behind oversized glasses. Minato uses his image because the man is long dead, and unlikely to ever be recognised by an enemy. It's also easier to maintain a henge of a person whose features are familiar to you, so you don't accidentally enlarge a nose or change height in-between uses.

Minato considers his angle. The shinobi could be from Konoha – possibly even locked in a clash with Iwa, which would explain the unrestrained nature of the chakra lashing out at his senses. If they aren't from Konoha, he still needs to ascertain who they really are, and if they pose a threat to his mission. His unsanctioned mission to keep his team alive, naturally.

"I'm your father. We're hunting in the forest. We overheard a ruckus that might disturb the prey. Sound good?" Minato asks. He always checks with the kids before going ahead with a plan. He doesn't like to run roughshod over them.

Kakashi rolls his eyes, then winces, clamping a hand over his Sharingan. Minato tousles Kakashi's newly-blond hair, giving him a gentle smile when he looks up, eyes watering with pain.

"Why do I always have to pretend to be your son?" Kakashi grumbles.

"So my fatherly pride won't look out of place." Minato grins, then leaps off the tree. There's the slightest rustle of grass, marking Kakashi's landing as he follows him down.

They approach the chakra cautiously, Kakashi a few paces behind Minato. He always insists on either leading the pack or covering the rear when moving as a squad. There's nothing he hates more than being in the safest spot, sheltered in the middle. Sometimes Minato despairs of his kids.

They're approaching a settlement. It doesn't look affiliated with any particular village, and a quick look at the possibly-defunct map reveals it's not even marked down. There's a large building in the very centre, possibly a temple or shrine, with carved statues lining the entrance. Very traditional in appearance. The chakra is resonating from the building.

Minato leans against the wall next to the entrance, not bothering to funnel chakra to his ears. No point possibly alerting an enemy to your presence with enhanced hearing at this close range.

"Art?" He hears a deep voice say, a faint echo attached to the sound.

"The art that I create with clay that I make myself!" A younger voice chirps. Older than Kakashi, younger than him. At that ambiguous, hard to pin down age.

Have they truly just stumbled upon an innocent conversation about art? Which also happens to involve three powerful shinobi positively leaking chakra? Hmm, Minato makes a face, the odds seem to be against us having a peaceful chat about clay. Shame. I know… nothing about clay. Or art. Probably for the best if this breaks out into a fight.

"It can also explode!" The younger one enthuses. Minato stiffens, exchanging a perturbed look with Kakashi. "And when it does, it makes its existence more sublime… And that's when it finally becomes art! Because art is an explosion!"

Kakashi makes the hand-signs for unstable opponent. Minato flaps his hand back, bracing for an explosion. He knows how these things usually go.

"That's enough." A third voice says quietly, cold enough to send warning shivers down Minato's spine. He feels chakra rise up, gathering in anticipation for a technique, and gestures for Kakashi to circle around the back of the building. "I'll handle this."

Kakashi flickers to the exit, still in view. He's poised and ready for a fight. Judging by the volume of voices, he is now closest to the cold-voiced one.

"What? You want to fight?" The youngest asks, sounding delighted. Why is Minato surrounded by idiot, thrill-seeking children?

"Yes, and if I win, you'll become a member of Akatsuki." The cold voice says, still not changing in pitch or tone at all.

Akatsuki is unfamiliar, but Minato's heard enough gang names to recognise what this is. They're attempting to pressgang the kid into joining whatever group they're in. Anger boils in his gut. He hates when people's choices are stolen from them.

Do not engage with enemy, he signs, throwing in a few caution! Wait for me! Danger! signs to hammer it home. Kakashi tosses his head.

Minato edges into view, peering into the room for the first time.

The kid is sitting in front of him, thankfully turning to look back at the other occupants of the room. Minato's gaze skids over him and hits the three shinobi, all wearing black and red cloaks. One has stepped forward, his eyes red and his –

Minato feels something cold creep down his spine.

His eyes are red, like Obito and Kakashi's. He's wearing a hitae-ate just like Minato's, only his has a neat scar running through the middle.

An Uchiha went rogue? He thinks, mind buzzing with the implications the news brings. More reason for the village to distrust the clan. More reasons for the clan to stay insular, refusing to let anyone in or out. In other words, a disaster.

And though the Uchiha hasn't quite released his jutsu just yet, he is clearly gathering an illusion as he maintains eye contact with the kid.

Minato hates himself.

He flashes a quick, go back to the others if I die, at Kakashi, then steps into the building.

Instantly, all eyes are on him.

He avoids looking directly at the Uchiha, instead smiling at the very large… shark-man. Minato regrets everything.

"Is everything alright?" He asks, his voice the same gentle wisp Fujioka once used.

"Get lost, old man." The kid says. His words are harsh, but he widens his eyes meaningfully, jerking his head ever so slightly at the Akatsuki behind him.

Aw, he's trying to warn me! Minato instantly warms to the kid.

"I heard raised voices and I was concerned." Minato says, stepping further into the building, ignoring the kid's crazed attempts to make eye contact. "Is there a problem? If you're outsiders, the Elder is the person to talk to."

The shark-man turns to the Uchiha, one hand casually lifting to his sword, a tell he wouldn't allow in front of an enemy shinobi. The perks of being a fake-civilian.

"Should I?" The shark-man asks, his voice low.

Minato folds his arms, trying to look stern, "Young man, this is not the place for violence. And I do not appreciate such bald-faced threats. I won't stand idly by as a boy is beleaguered by ruffians."

"He is a missing-nin," The Uchiha says calmly, "He fled to your town as a way to avoid reprisals from his home village after he bombed it on his way out."

Minato allows his shock to show – he's playing a civilian, after all – but firms his stance, refusing to back down, "I don't know enough about the big villages to say whether or not you shinobi aren't always bombing your homes. For all I know, it's some kind of… training exercise! And you won't distract me. He's not made any trouble since his arrival, been very quiet, keeping to himself. The only trouble we've had is you lot. I'm going to have to ask you nicely to leave. And if you don't, then I won't be quite so nice the second time I ask!"

The Uchiha sighs, a faint breath barely disturbing the silence, then nods to the shark-man, "Kisame, take care of him."

"Hey!" The kid jumps up, fists raised. Clay leaks out from between his fingers. "Didn't you say we could fight? What's the matter – scared you won't win? Have to pick fights with old civilians, yeah?"

"Less of the old," Minato grouses, then strides forward, "And don't make trouble with shinobi. Kisame, is it?" He addresses the shark-man, planting his hands on his hips. "How about this – if I can knock you down just once, you'll leave the boy alone."

"Oi, jiji, you wanna die, yeah?" The boy hisses.

"Everyone dies. Hardly anyone lives. And if you go through life ignoring your conscience and allowing others to suffer, you're already dead." Minato says, offering the boy a little smile.

"Fine last words, old man." Kisame says cheerfully, arms outstretched in invitation. "Go ahead. Knock me down."

"This is a complete waste of time." The large, hulking figure in the corner says. His voice has a hollow ring to it.

"Says you. I've not had this much fun in forever." Kisame grins, showing off rows of sharp, shining teeth.

"Out of interest, do most shinobi look like you?" Minato inquires politely.

Kisame cracks his neck, "I'm one of a kind."

"He's a freak of nature." The large man offers dryly.

Kisame puffs up immediately, ready for a fight, but the Uchiha raises his hand.

"Sasori was right the first time. This is a pointless diversion."

"I've faced veteran shinobi who've shown more fear than this old guy." Kisame protests. "I want to have fun feeding Samehada."

Not only is Minato a veteran shinobi, he's fresh off a mission that involved him versus a thousand veteran shinobi. Iwa now has a thousand less shinobi.

"I'm not afraid," Minato says calmly, "Because I'm going to knock you down."

Kisame chuckles, loosening up his stance as if helping Minato along with his promise, "Go ahead, then, old man. I'm dying to see what you can do."

"I bet you are," Minato mumbles, then flickers forward.

It's the work of an instant to hook a foot around Kisame's ankle and to give his back a good, hard shove. He topples head over heels, and Minato is already moving before his friends can make reprisals.

His hands slam down to the wooden floor, a golden seal flaring beneath his palms.

Sasori crashes through the wall.

The Uchiha manages to dodge, but Kakashi's already taken advantage of the diversion and yanked the boy out of the room, so Minato calls it a job well done.

He kicks out at Kisame as he rolls on the floor, trying to spring to his feet. The Uchiha makes a move, so Minato flicks a kunai in his general direction, expecting him to dodge, then he appears behind the missing-nin.

The Uchiha whirls around, red eyes blurring into view, but Minato sinks his fist into his gut. To his surprise, the blow's enough to make blood spray out of the man's mouth, his whole body curving into Minato's fist.

Weak condition, Minato notes, then flickers away as Kisame's sword comes down over his head.

Kisame is grinning, wild delight in his eyes, "'Do most shinobi look like you,'" He quotes, spinning his massive sword with a careless hand gesture, "You really fooled me there, old man! I thought you were an uppity civilian on a suicidal moral crusade. I'm really gonna enjoy this…"

"Don't be so sure." Minato graces him with a rare smirk, then flashes through the hole Sasori left.

There's no sign of the larger man when Minato emerges, which is troublesome. There's every chance he went after Kakashi and the boy, which means Minato has to head off Kisame and the rogue Uchiha, then circle back and avoid Sasori.

Should be simple enough.

xxxxxxxx

"You're late," Is the first thing Kakashi says as Minato swings up onto the same branch as him, "Did you have trouble losing them?"

"..No." Minato says finally, glancing between his subordinate and the blond kid they picked up. "Hi. Got a name? Sorry to barge in like that, but it seemed like you needed help."

The kid puffs out his cheeks, close to an outburst. He swallows it down, simply saying, "I'm Deidara. I could have handled it. There were only three guys, yeah?"

"Yeah," Minato repeats blankly, unsure of how to deal with yet another difficult teen, "But there's a chance you couldn't handle it by yourself, and then where would you be? Uh, yeah?"

Deidara's face turns mottled red, "Are you making fun of me?"

"This is pointless," Kakashi says, eerily close to the rogue Uchiha's flat tone, "Sensei, I suggested we return to Kusa, but he refused to enter one of the main villages."

"I'm a missing-nin, yeah?" Deidara tosses his head. "We're not exactly welcome in shinobi territory."

"Unless you're in a gang," Minato points, studying Deidara's expressive face, "You could have protection with them. Ample pay, steady work, freedom to move about in the villages…"

"It's just another cage. You see how they were all wearing the same cloaks? And they had the same look in their eye, like this was just another job and they didn't care either way how it went. I don't want that kind of complacency. I want to make every day spontaneous and magnificent! I don't ever want to be like them," Deidara spits, hugging his knees. Kakashi is loosely gripping his arm, but he doesn't seem to notice or care, "I want to be free to make my art, to show the world that impermanence is the most perfect kind of beauty. Transience is – "

"Okay, okay," Minato says, holding up his hand, "I get it. Art is an explosion, that's great. So, who are you and why were this 'Akatsuki' targeting you in the first place?"

"They said it back there," Deidara replies sulkily, "I stole forbidden scrolls and took out half of Iwa in my escape."

"Iwa?" Minato repeats, "You're a missing-nin from Iwa?"

If Deidara – and the rogue Uchiha – were telling the truth, one of Iwa's own had dealt them a crippling blow. This could put an end to the war. Minato's disastrous mission would be swept under the rug.

He can't help but beam at Deidara, who looks startled, "That's great! Way to go, kid."

Deidara scoots back a little on the branch, looking uncertain, "And who are you, anyway? I thought you were a civilian, but you were so fast… you took out Shark-Breath like it was nothing!"

Minato shrugs, "I had a huge advantage. He felt strong. I don't know how a real head-to-head with him and me would go."

Kakashi makes an impatient noise, and Minato shakes himself out of his reverie. He was picturing being swatted like a fly by Kisame's enormous sword.

"Right. Plans. Okay, you head back to the clinic and let the team know what's happened, then come find me and Deidara at the inn on the map that's marked yellow, okay?" Minato claps a hand on Kakashi's shoulder, carefully not using names or specifics around Deidara.

"How will I know what room you're in?" Kakashi asks.

"I'll mark the door." Minato winks, twirling a kunai around his finger.

xxxxxxxx

Kakashi is not having a good day.

Things went from bad to slightly better to much worse in quick succession. Seeing Obito like that, half-crushed and so clearly beyond help… it had broken something inside Kakashi. He's not sure it'll ever grow back whole, whatever it was.

Then Minato showed up, his face stern and achingly cold, and he ripped through the boulder with a doton jutsu like it was nothing, even though earth was his opposing element.

Minato had touched Obito's cheek, bid Kakashi and Rin to hold his hand, then he activated his teleportation jutsu and they veered sickeningly through space, winding up on the other side of the thick, rock wall. Kakashi had fallen to his knees, his senses wrenched by the journey. He had barely noticed the multiple chakra signals converge on their location. They had felt like buzzing bees, just a white noise of static until they grew in number and volume, impossible to ignore.

They were surrounded by an endless force of Iwa shinobi.

Rin went pale, clutched Obito's uninjured hand. Kakashi pressed in close to her. He was just glad they wouldn't die in that nightmarish cave, together in the dark.

And Minato had sighed, brushed off his uniform, and slowly stood up.

Kakashi's eye had been streaming with blood and tears, so what followed was blurred and confusing, but Rin confirmed it for him shortly after: Minato decimated the squadron.

It was only when he tried to teleport again, his hand on Obito's, the rest of the team huddled around him, and one of the last Iwa nin threw that jutsu their way just at the moment of transportation.

They arrived not too far off their previous location, but everything seemed slightly… wrong.

Kakashi is still wearing his pale blond and dark-eyed henge, though he's flagging. He feels like he passed exhausted a long time ago and is now firmly on the other side. He heads for the back-alley clinic, hoping Rin will have more soldier pills to perk him up. He doesn't trust Deidara, and certainly doesn't trust his sensei will be sensible about him. He always did love his lost causes.

Kakashi can hear the low murmur of agitated voices coming from inside the clinic, and he speeds up ever so slightly.

"But he'll die – " That's Rin, sounding fraught and at the edge of tears.

Kakashi bursts into the room.

The three shady medics from before are standing around Obito on the cot, none of them making a move to treat his injuries. Despite his pallor, despite the beads of sweat at his brow, none of them are trying to help him.

"What's going on?" Kakashi growls.

Rin is standing on a stool, bending over Obito. One glowing hand rests on his forehead, the other on his chest. There's no colour in her cheeks, she is chalk-white and her eyes are bloodshot. She's pushing the edge of chakra exhaustion.

"We were just explaining that your friend's injuries are more severe than we'd originally thought," One of the men says, tucking his thumbs into his pockets and puffing out his chest, "So we're naturally gonna need more money to cover the bill."

"You originally thought his injuries were not severe?" Kakashi says flatly, taking one threatening step forward. "Take over for my friend, right now. Give us the service we paid for, or I will slowly take its worth from your flesh."

"Kakashi, that won't help." Rin says, her voice strained.

"It would make me feel better." Kakashi eyes the nearest man.

"You need to pay for the service we're offering, or else our time and energy will be wasted." The man says, unfazed.

Kakashi grinds his teeth. "I don't have any money on me. I would have to retrieve it from my sensei, and he's – "

"By the time you got there and back it'd be too late." The man shrugs, casting Obito a cursory glance. "The kid's done for. He doesn't have much time left. Might be kinder to put him out of his misery now – "

Though Kakashi moves to shut the man up, he doesn't get there fast enough.

Rin leaps down from her stool and punches the man in the face.

"You're a disgrace to our profession, you washed-up, useless waste of flesh!" She snarls. "I hope you've enjoyed every second of this vile life you've chosen to lead. You make me sick."

The man stares, covering his rapidly-swelling cheek.

"Kakashi, you'll have to carry Obito." Rin says, her voice icily calm. Kakashi glances down at her hands. They're shaking in rage.

"If we take him away from the only medics other than you, what can we do for him? You're nearly out of chakra, and – "

"I'll be fine," Rin interrupts impatiently, "Because we're going to take these kind gentlemen's entire supply of chakra pills."

"What?" One of the other men laughs, incredulous.

Rin wipes the sweat from Obito's face, and turns to look at the men, deadly serious, "Kakashi, how would you like to collect that flesh you mentioned before?"

The men all go white with shock.

Kakashi smiles, then unsheathes his blade.

xxxxxxxx

Deidara is sitting on the hotel bed, quiet as a mouse. It looks as though the reality of his situation is sinking in.

"You're not really from that town I was staying in, are you?" He mumbles, peering up at Minato through his bangs.

"Guilty." Minato smiles, tucking his cloak back into his pack. "I'm from Konoha. But don't worry. I've got no plans to hand you over to my people."

Deidara eyes him, clearly unconvinced.

Minato sits on the other bed next to Deidara's. He stretches, letting out a long, ragged sigh as his muscles ache sharply in unison.

"I'm no missing-nin, but I've technically gone rogue on this mission," Minato says, observing the tell-tale sag of relief in Deidara's shoulders, "I rescued my team instead of completing the objective. And then I overheard your situation while I was scouting and… I've gone completely off-schedule, off the book and off the map, by all accounts. I've never done that before."

"Normally a good boy, huh?" Deidara snorts. "Always doing what you're told, yeah?"

Minato flops back on the bed, "Is it that obvious?"

Before Deidara can shred his self-esteem even further, there's a quiet knock at the door. Minato swings his feet over his bed and casually taps the heel of his foot against the floor three times. The person at the door knocks twice more, and Minato relaxes.

He opens the door, an unpleasant twist in his gut at the sight of Obito splayed across Kakashi's back, his side a mass of partially-healed wounds.

"In." He says, clipped, and pushes the door closed with a little more force than necessary.

Rin immediately directs Kakashi to lay Obito down on the empty bed, her arms straining under the weight of several heavy bags. Minato glances at the floor. There's small traces of blood in the muddy footprints they both tracked into the room. Minato fixes his gaze on the ceiling and questions his life, not for the first time that day.

Deidara stares, fascinated, as Rin swallows several pills, cracking her knuckles and spreading her hands over Obito's much-abused body.

"If he starts to bleed again, grind up a blood-replenishing pill and sprinkle it in his water," Rin tells Kakashi, "We need to keep him hydrated so he can start replacing the blood he's already lost."

Deidara's hands twist in his lap, his brow furrowed as he takes in the scene. He clearly dislikes not having something to do.

Minato spots the edge of a mouth in his palm, eyebrows jerking up.

Deidara sees him looking and tugs his sleeves down over his fingers, scowling at the floor.

"Hey, is there anything I can do?" Minato asks, addressing Rin. He's still avoiding names, just in case. He's pretty sure they can trust Deidara, but 'pretty sure' is not enough to gamble his team's lives on.

"Sure," Kisame's voice grates behind him at the window, "You can give me your name."

Deidara leaps off the bed, landing by Minato's side. Kakashi unsheathes his blade, pointing it directly at Kisame's grinning face. The Uchiha is climbing through the window after his teammate, eyes fixed on Deidara. Minato slings an arm around his shoulders.

"Kids, go." Minato says quietly, eyes on the Uchiha's feet, waiting for him to make a move.

"I'm in the middle of surgery." Rin says, sweat-matted hair falling into her eyes, hands shaking over Obito's chest. Her hackles are raised like an angry cat. She's not moving.

Kakashi has planted himself in front of his team, "We're not leaving you, sensei."

Minato's hand tightens on Deidara's shoulder, then he tugs him behind him.

Minato is bone-tired. He's not sure how many Iwa shinobi he killed to protect his team, but now he's just about ready to do it again to protect an Iwa shinobi who's trembling behind him. It's funny, where the world takes you.

He's still wearing his henge.

"My name is Mugetsu," He says, thinking of how the moon was blotted out by the pile of corpses he created on his first ANBU mission. The night was darker after he arrived. "And your mission is over."

Kisame's grin sharpens.

Minato twirls two kunai in his hands, rolling his neck around to get rid of the knots in his spine. The Uchiha tenses at his approach, Kisame's eagerness only grows.

"If you survive, tell your masters Akatsuki is dead." Minato says calmly.

Kisame's mouth opens to talk, the Uchiha's head turns ever so slightly to listen, and Minato acts.

He throws the kunai and completes the hand-seals for his barrier technique before the kunai even have time to strike.

His barrier is a large orb of chakra that surrounds what he wants to protect, warping away any damage that hits it. The side of the room with Deidara, Kakashi, Rin and Obito, is now pulsing with purple chakra that will repel any force that attacks them.

Minato smiles at Kisame, enjoying the flush of anger swirling across his face like a bold stroke of paint.

He has to kill them both, and Sasori, wherever he might be. He has to do it, and quick enough to save Obito, too. He has to do this.

Minato breathes in, then flashes forward to meet Kisame's blade.

xxxxxxxx

They were stronger than he thought they were.

His chakra reserves might be the stuff of legend, but even they could deplete, and he was achingly close to running on empty.

The battle flashes through his mind in broken fragments.

Kisame's snarling mouth at his throat, the Uchiha's ringed hand reaching for his face, Sasori finally showing up and unleashing poison that flooded the room, leaving Minato dizzy and grinning until his face hurt because finally, finally, he felt he had a reason to let go.

Kakashi's voice, hoarse from screaming for him to release the barrier and let him fight.

Eventually it ached viciously whenever he summoned chakra, his movements sloppy, less polished, and his vision began to grey over. He was so, so tired, but he could not rest. Not while there were children at his back, people he loved and would give every piece of himself to keep safe.

Kisame's fist sunk into his stomach, a visceral revenge for the blow he'd dealt the Uchiha, and he whispered in his ear, "Akatsuki will never die, old man. That's the point."

Minato gasped, clutching at Kisame's cloak, his chakra pulling in a thousand different directions – amplifying his strength, speed and stamina, coating the walls of his barrier to keep the kids safe from Sasori's relentless attack, maintaining his henge of old man Fujioka, the man who never truly got to grow old, despite his reputation. The gentle civilian who died in violence and war, far too young to look so old. Minato saw his corpse, broken and stiff, his face creased like ancient leather.

Fujioka, Minato thought, drifting to sleep, Fujioka deserved a little bit more from life.

Deidara's voice ripped through his peaceful tranquillity, an explosion sending him into silence.

Minato wakes up feeling well-rested and heartsore. The latter is not a totally new sensation, but the former brings up questions. He's grown used to snatching sleep here and there, always being ready for battle at any second, be it during a mission or a surprise invasion on home turf. He stays still, listening intently.

A scrape of wood on his right – a chair being pulled next to his bedside. Because he is in a bed, which is strange, because the last thing he remembers is the mission to destroy Kannabi bridge going sideways in the worst way imaginable. He's pretty sure no one thought to bring beds. He's also sure if Iwa caught them, they would've killed them all. Especially him. But then – a flicker of pain in his skull, throbbing through his temples, bringing memory with it. There was more after the bridge, there were black cloaks with red clouds, the leering maw of a shark in a man's face, a too-young recruit hiding fear beneath blustering cockiness, Obito twisted and broken and wrong –

"Minato-kun." The Sandaime's voice, a croak more akin to one of Jiraiya's summons than the esteemed Hokage.

Minato opens one eye, squinting through the pain, "Hokage-sama," He replies, managing a crooked grin, "Would you care for a mission report?"

Rather than the amusement he expects, he's surprised to see sorrow cross the Sandaime's face. When he speaks, his hands squeeze his pipe almost to the point of snapping, "Minato-kun, what happened? The Yamanaka clan could only verify that you and your team were in fact, yourselves, but beyond that, your memories all have a strange blip right after the Kannabi Bridge Mission."

Ah. That'll be the space-time ninjutsu shenanigans. He'd been hoping he wouldn't have to explain that, mostly because he couldn't.

"I abandoned my mission in order to ensure my team's safety." Minato says, gazing steadily back at the Hokage. He knows what he did, and he makes no apologies for it. He knows Kushina would do the same, if she had a genin team. Hell, she'd do it for his team. "I found Obito in a near-death state, and Kakashi and Rin were surrounded by Iwa nin. I killed the enemy shinobi and grabbed the team, preparing to transport them to safety. One of the surviving nin threw a jutsu at the exact moment I activated mine, and instead of ending up near our camp, we wound up in unfamiliar territory. My priority was finding Obito some help, so we utilised a nearby clinic. We ran into a little trouble with a missing-nin from Konoha, an Uchiha with advanced Sharingan. I've never seen him before. There was also a large, hulking man from Suna, and a terrifying shark-man from Kiri. All missing-nin. All powerful. They were trying to forcibly recruit some kid – and you know I hate bullies – so I had to step in. We talked, things didn't go as well as hoped, and we had to take the kid and run. They chased us down, I passed out, and, uh… here I am. End of report, I guess."

Sarutobi's eyes are gleaming with unshed tears. Minato struggles to sit up, unsure why comfort is needed, but always prepared to give it.

"As concise a report as I remember you giving," Sarutobi says hoarsely, "But I'm afraid it only leaves me with more questions than answers. For one, how old are you?"

Minato frowns. Is this some belated test for a concussion?

"Twenty-three, Hokage-sama."

Sarutobi nods, lighting his pipe with a twitch of his fingers. He takes a deep breath, steeling himself, then continues, "And who is the Yondaime Hokage?"

Huh? This must be a test. "There isn't one. Unless… did you appoint a successor while I was out of the village?" He asks, momentarily put-out, until a thought occurs to him and he perks up. "Is it Kushina?"

Sarutobi douses his pipe abruptly, thrusting into his jacket pocket without a word. He pinches the bridge of his nose, bending over in his chair. It looks as though a heavy weight has settled on his back. Minato watches, fear starting to creep over him. What could have happened to make the Hokage so… fragile?

"Do you not remember the Kyuubi?" Sarutobi asks, something pleading in his voice.

Minato scowls, "Of course. I just don't think it's any reason to stand in the way of Kushina's dreams. She keeps a tight leash on the Kyuubi and whatever happens, I can always help her keep it at bay. We're a team. You know what she always says – if she's not the Yondaime, she'll be the Godaime, and if not – "

"Minato-kun," Sarutobi interrupts, his voice grave and tight with repressed emotion. He lays a hand over Minato's. He flinches, having failed to notice he'd formed fists at some point, clenching his bedsheets in hand. "Minato-kun, I am so, so sorry."

"Just tell me." Minato says, his voice snapping out a flat order. He doesn't care that this is his superior, this is about Kushina. He needs to know.

"From what I can tell, you are not in the time you think you are," Sarutobi says slowly, "Nor, perhaps, the world. Because the Minato of my world destroyed Kannabi bridge, and was too late to save Uchiha Obito."

Minato stares.

Sarutobi takes his hand, his eyes wet with unshed tears.

"Nohara Rin died in the same year as the Kannabi Bridge Mission, sacrificing herself for her village. The next year… Minato-kun, the next year, you died. Sacrificing yourself for Konoha. I'm so sorry."

Minato feels the world fall away from him. Sarutobi catches him, his hands unbearably gentle against Minato's disembodied flesh. He loses himself for a few seconds, deaf and blind to all but the roar in his thoughts. Obito died… Rin died… I died.

"A-and," He hears himself say finally, tears choking his voice, "Kushina… she…?"

"Kushina died with you, sacrificing herself for her village… and your son." Sarutobi says, gripping him tight. "You have a son, Minato-kun. He's alive and well."

Minato pushes him away blindly, collapsing off the bed and onto the floor.

His face is wet.

"Kushina wasn't pregnant, I haven't seen her in months," Minato says harshly, "And she isn't dead. I would… I would know. I would feel it. And I don't. She's still here, I know it."

"Kushina died when the Kyuubi was extracted from her. You sealed it into your new-born son, saving Konoha from its rampage. We owe everything to you, and to Kushina. I wish I could give you better news, Minato-kun. You are the Yondaime Hokage, somehow delivered back to Konoha alive and well."

"Well?" Minato echoes, then gives a bitter laugh.

"Minato-kun… you are not the Namikaze Minato that I knew. That man was buried almost a decade ago. That man lost almost his entire team. You have not. Your team are still alive. You somehow managed to travel through time and space after the Kannabi mission, ending up here. I can take you to see Obito and Rin, and – "

"What about Kakashi? And the kid we picked up, Deidara?" Minato asks, pulling himself up slowly, because it's war and he cannot give himself more than a brief moment to mourn the loss of his world. There will always be a village that needs him. And he hates it.

"They are all fine," Sarutobi soothes, patting his arm, "Obito is in a makeshift intensive care unit, here in the ANBU barracks. Kakashi and Rin are with him. Deidara is being questioned. He's being cooperative to a point, insisting on making sure 'the old geezer' is alright. I'll assume that is you. The forces that found your team said you were wearing such a strong henge that it lasted for an hour after you lost consciousness. That was one of the facts that initially swayed me of the truth of your identity. Not many shinobi are strong enough to maintain techniques without consciously willing it."

Minato sits back down on the bed. He's considered he might be trapped in an illusion, or being tested in some way, because nothing feels real. Nothing is concrete. He's lost everything, except for –

His head snaps up, "Wait. You said the other me lost 'almost' his entire team. Does that mean – "

"Kakashi survived, yes," Sarutobi says, looking happy to have good news to deliver, "And he's around your age, now. Your son is – "

Minato holds up his hand, face crumpling at the word. There is no son. There can't be, not without Kushina. It's as if this hypothetical child sprang up from the earth. He isn't real. If he was, if Minato really does have a child, and now he has to live with knowing Kushina will never meet him…

Minato slowly lay back down on the bed, feel tears pour sluggishly down his face. They drip across his nose, splashing onto his pillow. It's like a tap turned on rather than a burst dam, just a steady, constant flow of grief.

He curls up, silent sobs wracking his frame.

Sarutobi's face twists in pain, but Minato closes his eyes, lashes wet and clumped together, not wanting to witness someone else's second-hand grief. Bad enough that he lost her. Worse that he wasn't there. But to experience her death through another person's account is torture.

"I'll leave you alone for a moment." Sarutobi says, pulling the blanket up to Minato's chin. Minato abruptly remembers that Sarutobi is a father. Just like him.

"Wait." Minato says, gripping the Sandaime's cloak.

He turns, concern clear on his face, "Yes?"

"The Minato of this world... do you think he's with Kushina, now?" Minato asks, blinking the tears away so he can look into Sarutobi's eyes, unimpeded. He needs to see the man's honest opinion.

Sarutobi smiles gently, "I do, yes."

There's a pause as Minato closes his eyes, breathing in deeply.

He shifts, then breaks out into a blinding grin, "Then I guess I better stick around. Three's a crowd and all that. Kushina would get mad if I called it quits here."

The look Sarutobi bestows upon him is so warm, so fond, that Minato feels the first stirring of hope since he woke up in this backwards version of his life.

"Hokage-sama… my son. What's his name?"

The look of fondness only increases at the mention of the boy. Sarutobi squeezes Minato's shoulder and says, "Naruto."

Minato laughs wetly, sniffing, and scrubs his face clean of grief.

"Of course," He says, getting ready to stand up and face the day, "Of course."

Hello, friends!

So I… I started another Naruto time travel AU. At this point, I don't think anyone's surprised, right?

I shamefully got this idea from a Naruto video game in which I pitted Rin, Obito and Kakashi against Sakura, Sasuke and Naruto, and then I was like, boy I sure wish these crazy kids could've met! And then brain was like wait. You could make that. You could make it happen.

And so I did.

In case this is confusing, the Minato of this fic is NOT exactly the same as canon Minato. He went back for his team earlier, abandoning his mission, and managed to save Obito before he could be Madara'd. Then he and the team ended up hurtling through time and space, ending up in canon Naruto, a future in which everything went wrong for Team Minato. But now they're here, ready start fixing shit and getting stuff done!

Kakashi is all about teamwork and protecting his comrades, now! *sobs*

We don't see a lot of Rin in the show, but since she mostly operated during wartime I feel like she'd be a hardened version of Sakura. Much more inclined to violence and acclimatised to gore and unpleasantness. She spent most of this chapter singlehandedly wrestling to keep Obito alive.

In case you were wondering, yes Kisame has a huge, raging hateboner going on for that weird not!civilian old man that knocked him on his arse.

Btw, I'm picturing Minato's henge as looking like Sakura's dad from Cardcaptors. So… a handsome nerd, basically.

I'm so happy I get to write post-Kannabi Team Minato WITHOUT Obito's death! So much fun :D

Potential pairings for this fic are: Minato/Zabuza (the main pairing), young Obito/young Kakashi, Sakura/Rin, adult KakaGai and adult Obito/Deidara.

Quick poll for fun: Which fictional character would you marry?

I, for example, would marry Sakura's dad from Cardcaptors.