Disclaimer: I do not own Hey Arnold or any of the characters. Hey Arnold is the property of Nickelodeon and Craig Bartlett.

Weird Cousin II

Saturday

Outside of Hillwood

It was a hot day and what looked to be a rusty, old pickup truck was driving in the direction of the town known as Hillwood. Inside this truck was a certain family that had a child with a football shaped head.

No, not THAT kid with the football shaped head, rather it's his cousin who was staring blankly out the window during the entire truck ride with his parents. The boy had spent his car ride counting each car that had passed them, since he liked to count and figured he had nothing better to do.

"That makes 8 trucks, 2 taxi's, 5 convertibles and one jeep..." The boy counted in his mind.

It was a boy named Arnie, Arnold's cousin who was now on his way to see his cousin because his parents had finally returned last summer from being missing in the jungle and Arnie's parent's wanted to see them. Usually Arnie's parent's just gave him bus fare whenever they send him to the city since they were usually busy tending to the farm but this time they wanted to come to the city in order to see Arnold's parents.

Arnie still didn't understand the reason for this trip, since they had already spoken to aunt Stella and uncle Miles over the phone practically every day, and they and Arnold had stopped by at their farm to see them a few months ago after they had come back, so they had already seen for themselves that they were okay...

It was weird but his parents, more particularly his mother, didn't seem to get enough of them or something...

"I still can't believe that my little sister is back...it's like a dream..."He heard his mother say to his father, sounding strangely happy.

His mother was usually a quiet person who rarely got excited, but she was with a lot of energy since she had seen her long lost sister again...

He suppose it made some sense, she was her sister, so maybe his mother did miss her or something, even if his mother didn't talk about her much. So they spent about the last few weeks organizing things so their animals and crops would be taken care of and saving up for the trip to the big city in order to see Stella and Miles.

Hey, they weren't exactly rich and usually couldn't afford bus passes and gas is expensive today, so they had to do some saving up... Sue them...

As they continued to drive, Arnie had stopped counting cars since there weren't anymore at the time and soon began to think.

It's been over a year since he last visited Hillwood and his cousin and he wondered about that place. Not many people knew this but he actually did enjoy his trips to the big city. It's pretty uneventful on the farm and not many kids live nearby him, he usually only seen other kids his age at his school that's in the middle of his town but he didn't really hang out with them after school since none of them could appreciate the fun of collecting lint or counting stuff.

However, he liked the city because it was big and there is many stuff to count, things to read off the many bill boards and flyers and lots of kids lived near his cousin, so it was never a dull moment.

Besides, there is one kid who lived there that Arnie was actually looking forward to see ,and it's not his cousin or that Lila girl who wouldn't leave him alone during his last trip...

"I wonder what Helga's up to...'Arnie thought, with a strange gleam in his eye as he thought about the tough blonde girl he had seen during his last visit here.

He was actually hoping to see her during this trip. She's pretty and she was spunky and Arnie liked that, not to mention she knew how to play hard to get, which Arnie liked too.

He was really looking forward to seeing her once again as soon as he managed to get away from his parents and cousin.

In Hillwood

Helga suddenly felt a weird chill run down her spine, though she didn't know why, since it was suppose to be a hot day.

Weird...I hope I'm not coming down with something...'Helga thought as she referred to her weird chill.

She didn't know why but she was getting a weird feeling that something wasn't right, but it couldn't be so. She was on her way to the boarding house to see her beloved Arnold and spend the day with him on a fun, sweet little date and just enjoy the sweet, magical bliss of young, preteen love.

'Oh Arnold~..." Helga swooned internally as she turned the corner and soon found herself on his street.

She couldn't resist it when she ended up skipping up to the door and rang the door bell, smiling patiently as she awaited for the door to open. She waited only a moment before the door opened, revealing Arnold's grandmother Gertie there.

"Why Eleanor, it's good to see you again..."Gertie said, calling her by the "nickname" she has chosen for her.

"Hello grandma Shortman, is Arnold home?...'Helga asked the elderly woman.

"Kimba is with the General in the mess hall..."The old woman said as she allowed the blonde girl inside.

Helga hadn't been here long but she had spent enough time around this woman to get a rough idea that she meant that Arnold was probably in the kitchen with either his parent's or his grandpa.

Sure enough, when she entered there, she saw Arnold with his grandfather eating some sandwiches on the table.

"Men, the first lady has arrived...'The old lady said eccentrically.

"Hi Helga..."Arnold waved to his girlfriend.

"You're just in time for some lunch, grab yourself a grilled cheese sandwich...'The old man said kindly.

"Thanks, don't mind if I do...'Helga said as she took a sandwich to eat.

'So anyway Arnold, I came by because I wanted to see if you wanted to go get an ice cream at Slaucens...'Helga said to her boyfriend, expecting him to say yes, which he totally did.

'Sure Helga..."Arnold said happily as he was about to leave, only to get the attention of his grandfather.

"Hold your horses short-man, don't tell me you forgot what today is already?..."Grandpa said.

"What's today grandpa?..."Arnold asked in confusion.

"You didn't really forget that your cousin Arnie and his folks are coming over today, did you?...'The old man asked.

Arnold heard this, blinked and then smacked his face in disbelief.

"That's today? I totally forgot..."Arnold sighed as he knew there was no out in this.

He knew that while his folks were busy spending the day with Arnie's parents, he was expected to spend time with his weird, dull as dirt cousin.

"Sorry Helga, looks like Slaucen's will have to wait...'Arnold sighed.

He turned to his girlfriend and then he noticed that she looked pale all of a sudden, like she was spooked out.

"Helga, are you okay?..."Arnold asked in concern in his voice, wondering if she is alright.

"You mean Arnie, pale, gross, weird cousin, phlegmy snort, lint collecting Arnie...'Helga asked in a shaky voice until she realized that she had been bad mouthing a member of Arnold's family with his grandfather present... "Um, no offence...'She added quickly.

'None taken, even I don't like that little weirdo..."Phil said, getting a dirty look from his grandson.

"Um...How long will they be in town for?...'She asked.

"Just this weekend, they'll be leaving tomorrow Sunday afternoon...'Arnold said.

"Well, I'll be leaving now...I'll call you tonight Arnold...bye bye..."Helga said quickly as she tried to rush out of the boarding house.

"What's with her?...'Grandpa asked his grandson who shrugged, though he had a feeling that he was forgetting about something.

Helga tried to rush out the door, in order to avoid Arnold's creepy cousin. She could still remember the day he said he loved her and how horrified she was when that creep spent the rest of his visit following her around.

She had been relieved when he had gone back to no-where's-ville and she was safe from his creepy clutches, but she had to get away before she crosses path's with him again. Sure, it's been a year since she had last seen him in person and yeah, there is a possibility that he forgot about her (not everyone can be as obsessive about love as she is) but she wasn't going to take any chances.

However, before she reached the door, she heard a car or rather a pickup truck pull up the boarding house drive way and she cursed under her breath.

"CRIMINY! ...'Helga said as she decided to sneak out the backway, only for Arnold to get to her in the kitchen.

"Helga, what's wrong? You look like you're trying to get away from a ghost or something?...'Arnold asked in concern.

"I wish...Can I sneak out back here?...'She asked him.

"What's wrong?..." Arnold demanded.

Helga blinked, unable to believe that he had forgotten already. Sure, it's been a few weeks since she told him, but she figured he wouldn't forget given how angry he had been at the time.

"Don't tell me that you already forgot..."Helga said in a hiss, causing her boyfriend to blink in surprise.

Helga groaned as she knew this is the case.

"In case you forgot, Arnie is one of the guys that had a crush on me and had followed me around like a shadow the last time he was here, so I want to get away from that creep now...'She said flatly.

Arnold's eyes widened when he heard that, as he know realize what he had forgotten and couldn't believe it.

'I'm such an idiot...I knew that I was forgetting something...'Arnold groaned.

"Well, you're my idiot...so I'll be heading home and hiding in my room until he leaves, call me when that happens, okay love...'Helga said in a sweet tone.

Arnold blinked, sure he had felt jealous that his cousin once took a fancy to his girlfriend but he also felt that maybe she was acting a little dramatic once again...

'Don't you think you're being a little dramatic Helga, it has been a year since you had last seen him, maybe he's over it..."Arnold suggested.

It has been a while, and whenever Arnie calls, he never mentioned something about having a crush on any girl, even Lila who had been all over him, so maybe he got over it.

"Well I don't want to risk it just in case, the last time he was here, he wouldn't leave me alone, everywhere I went, he was right behind me asking me if I wanted to see his lint collection and his stupid pile of dirt and no matter how many times I threatened to sock him in the jaw, he wouldn't stop..." Helga said.

"I guess that explains why I didn't see much of him during the last few days of his visit...'Arnold muttered, feeling the same jealous flare a bit in his gut.

"Doi! Now I want to leave before-

Snort...

"Oh no..."Helga turned around to see the pale face of Arnie literally 2 feet behind her, staring at her with that blank look on his face.

"Hi Helga...You look pretty..." Arnie said in his creepy monotone way.

Helga blanched as she literally now hid behind Arnold who was now glaring plainly at his own cousin, who had both called his girlfriend pretty and for making her feel uncomfortable.

"Okay, maybe she wasn't being dramatic..." Arnold thought.

"Hello Arnie...'Arnold said in an annoyed tone with his arms crossed.

"Hey...'He said in his empty way before he turned to Helga again... "So Helga, I found this neat piece of lint for you...'Arnie said as he reached into his pocket and pulled it out.

"Back off weirdo before I punch your face in...'Helga growled as she held her fist in warning.

"Still playing hard to get..." Arnie said in a creepy way that made Arnold furious.

Is he really so delusional that he can't see that Helga wants nothing to do with him?

'I AM NOT PLAYING HARD TO GET!...' Helga screamed in outrage and disgust.

"She's NOT playing hard to get Arnie and I will ask you kindly to leave MY GIRLFRIEND alone..."Arnold said in a level voice, trying to control his jealousy.

"Your girlfriend?...'Arnie asked as he did his creep blink-one-eye-at-a-time thing.

"Yes, Helga is my girlfriend now, we're dating..." Arnold said with his arms crossed, hoping that he would get the message.

'Are you? Or are you guys faking it to get attention like during the last time I was here?...'Arnie said flatly.

Arnold and Helga both blinked when he said this. They had forgotten that they both posed as a couple in order to get Lila away from him, they didn't realize that he might have known about it.

"Wait? You knew about that?...'Arnold asked in confusion.

"It was obvious...and I overheard you guys talking about it when you thought no one was looking...'Arnie said as he one-eye-at-a-time blinked once again.

Arnold and Helga both looked at each other in confusion, not sure how to respond to that. Though Arnie just continue to stare at them with that creepy look on his face.

"I will say this Helga, I think it's cute that you tried to get me to notice you by trying to make me jealous..." Arnie said.

'EXCUSE ME?...'Helga exclaimed in a flabbergasted tone.

"You tried to make me jealous by pretending to like my cousin, well it worked..."Arnie said.

"Hold it right there creep-o... Let's get one thing straight here, I do NOT like you, I love ARNOLD and I was NOT trying to make you jealous, all I was doing was tricking your cousin into spending time with me that day...I didn't care about you or Lila...'Helga said seriously.

"Yeah, that makes way more sense now that I think about it...'Arnold said before he noticed that Arnie is not moving.

"Are you serious?...'Arnie asked, still not sounding convinced.

'What's that suppose to mean?...'Arnold demanded, not liking the way that sounded.

"No offense Arnold, but I don't see a girl acting that crazy for you..."Arnie said, in his monotone voice but if you listened hard enough, it almost sounded smug.

"Listen here creep, Arnold is the only guy for me because unlike you he's handsome, sweet, cute, fun, funny, nice, cool and doesn't creep people out with dirt and lint...'Helga said, with Arnold looking happy at hearing that.

"Prove it..." Arnie said.

"Excuse me?..." Helga asked.

"Prove to me that you guys are actually a couple..." Arnie said in his same way that was making Helga furious.

"Why you creepy dork! Who are you making demands like this...Even if we weren't a couple, I still wouldn't like you and you have no right acting like it's hard to think a girl would prefer Arnold over you..." Helga said.

Helga however was silenced and her temper was calmed down when Arnold grabbed her face and gave her a kiss right on the lips, surprising her but it only took a second for Helga to calm down and get into the kiss.

Arnie's eyes widen when he saw this, which was a very rare thing for him since that only happened when he actually sees something that surprises him, which again, not much does. He was only 11 and he didn't really expect them to actually kiss but from the way he seen it, it's obvious it wasn't a fake with how they were now hugging each other as they kissed.

It basically did prove that they clearly had a thing going on, you don't kiss someone like that unless you were totally into them...

"Ok...I believe you...'Arnie said but he was ignored as the couple continued to kiss.

"Guys...you made your point...'Arnie said but was ignored again, and the creepy child was blinking and actually...well...getting unnerved by this whole thing.

After what felt like forever, they finally stopped kissing, likely so they could come up for air and Arnold turned to his cousin with a smug look on his face.

"Proof enough for you Arnie...Now, we're family and I care about you, I will only say this to you this once...Helga is my girl, so I will thank you to back off...'The boy said to his cousin who still gave them that flat look.

"Whatever...I'll go call Lila and see if she wants to do something...'Arnie said as he walked away while his cousin and his girlfriend who were still in each other's arms.

"Weirdos...' The pale boy thought as he went to find a phone and call the red head girl from his last visit.

She might not be as exciting as Helga or as spunky, but he doubted she was busy or taken tonight...

Back in the kitchen

Even though Arnie was out of this place, Arnold still looked upset as he was just marching back and forth with an outraged look on his face.

"I just can't believe him, I knew he was weird but come on... How dare he come onto you like that and act like it's hard that you love me that much..." Arnold said in outrage as he flailed his arms around Helga.

"Arnold...'Helga said, but he was still in the middle of his rant.

"And how dare he keep pushing and say you were playing hard to get, you so totally were NOT playing hard to get but he didn't want to see that...'Arnold continued.

"Arnold..." Helga said again but Arnold wasn't done yet.

"And he actually had the nerve to believe you were trying to make HIM jealous and he thought you couldn't possibly actually like ME! Is he serious?! I'M not the one who's idea of fun is reading the ingredients on SHAMPOO BOTTLES! OH! Cousin or not, if he tries anything like this again, I'm not speaking to him, period!...I'm sorry I didn't take it seriously before Helga but not anymore, I don't care if he's my cousin, no one talks to my girlfriend that way!...'Arnold said before he found himself panting, actually having exhausted himself from his heated words.

'Arnold...'Helga said and Arnold finally noticed that she had been trying to talk to him for the last five minutes...

"I'm sorry for ranting like that Helga, but Arnie has this bad habit of getting under my skin when it comes to girls..." Arnold said while his girlfriend was smiling for some reason.

What could she possibly have to smile about at a time like this?

"I must say Arnold, I never realized just how cute you look when you get all jealous like that..." Helga said with a giggle.

"I am NOT jealous, I just didn't like the way he was harassing you...'Arnold said with his arms crossed while Helga was still giggling.

"Oh really...So, you weren't just a teensy-bit jealous there...because if you were, it was actually kind of hot how you took charge and told him to back off like that...'Helga said with a smitten look on his face.

"You mean it..."Arnold said with interest... "Well, okay...maybe just a little bit... I can't help it, who wouldn't be if they had a girl like you...'He said in a flirtatious tone.

"Now you know what I had to go through when I saw you with those girls who were thankfully too dumb to see what a catch you are...'Helga said, making Arnold chuckle at that.

"Okay, enough...Come on, let's head off to Slaucens ...'Arnold said.

"I thought your grandpa said that you had to stay here and play with Arnie...'Helga said.

"I'm still too mad at him after what he said to deal with him right now...but I'll come back later...'Arnold said.

"Jealous..."Helga said in a teasing voice.

"Only for you...'Arnold said as he and Helga shared another kiss.

Arnold went to his grandfather while his parents were busy talking to his aunt and uncle, while Arnie had apparently left to meet up with Lila. He asked him for permition to leave to get ice cream with Helga and his grandfather had decided to let him since Arnie had left but told him to come back with his cousin by dinner time.

Now Arnold had left hand in hand with his sweet girlfriend Helga, off to get some ice cream together. Unknown to them, by the nearby park, Arnie had met up with Lila, who looked very happy to see them.

"Oh Arnie, it's ever so wonderful to see you again...'The red haired girl said as she gave him a hug, which didn't change the unemotional look on his face.

"Hey...'Arnie said in his monotone way while Lila kept smiling.

"So Arnie, what do you want to do together on this ever so lovely day?...'Lila asked as she was beaming in excitement.

"I don't know...stuff...'He said flatly with no emotion once again.

"Well, it is an ever so hot day today, why don't we go to Slaucens for some ice cream.." Lila said with her perky smile.

"Sure...'He answered as Lila took his arm as practically dragged the pale boy to the ice cream parlor.

The End

A/N: Sorry if Arnold seemed a little OOC in this one shot but in his defense, who wouldn't feel upset with some guy hitting on his girlfriend and implying that they could do better...

:) Till next time beautiful people, remember to read and review :)