For the incredible king . needlemouse! Check out his profile if you haven't already, like seriously. –anyway. Darling beed, sunshine boy, writer of angst, crusher of hearts (ily but please don't kill silver), happy birthday! ! I hope you have a fantastic day (even if I got the timezones wrong. Have a fantastic week) enjoy being both taller and older than me and Tek, happy birthday, and here's my present to you:

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When Shadow goes down, Sonic destroys five bots in three seconds, and then he dives after him. Tails and Knuckles and Amy have his back, but shit- there's a lot of blood. Must've been a couple of lucky shots. Sonic's stomach drops at the sight, and he scrambles to put pressure on the wound-

"Don't," Shadow hisses, and Sonic stops to stare for exactly one second.

"Yeah, no. Dude, you're bleeding out," Sonic says, trying to keep his cool, because Sonic is always cool, even when he's kneeling in a factory full of enemies with his hands covered in his friend's blood. It'll be fine. See, Shadow is still awake and talking, and also swatting away Sonic's hands-

He takes a breath and snarls, "Shadow, I don't care what your issue is-"

Then he stops. Beneath Sonic's hands smeared with red – the blood has stopped pouring out of the wound, and is instead running back inside. The wound is, as Sonic watches in a moment of dumbfounded silence, starting to absorb blood into itself and then mending so fast he can see it clearly. It's just sort of happening and Sonic is just sort of staring. The last of the skin mends itself back together swiftly, as easy as closing a box.

There's still blood staining his gloves.

Sonic looks up, still staring, and Shadow's eyes met his in a very uncomfortable sort of gaze. Maybe Shadow is trying to communicate something deeper, but right now Sonic only has a single, very specific emotion. That emotion is called 'hey, what the fuck.'

"It's under control," Shadow says, after a moment.

"Right." Sonic looks down at Shadow's stomach again, perfectly unmarred. "Right."

The first time he realised – or relearnt, remembered, re-realised – was back when he was still 85% convinced that he was an android. He broke his ankle and leg in a fall from a cliff, and then spent a long, eternally long and painful minute, just lying face-down in the sand, trying not to breathe because it hurt so bad as the bones rearranged themselves.

Rouge and Omega found him a while later, and in an unusual show of trust, he told them. He didn't know what it was that had happened, and neither did they. It wasn't like it mattered, in the grand scheme of things. (he figures, now, later, that it was that which saved him when he fell from ARK. It heals his body but does nothing for his mind)

The professor called it 'Immortality'.

Shadow doesn't call it anything, because he never brings it up.

When they've cleared out the stragglers and the fox has downloaded everything he wanted from the Doctor's computers, Sonic cheerfully suggests that they all should rendezvous at his and Tails' house. Amy and Knuckles are coming, of course, the echidna mostly because he seems to be crashing on their sofa already, and then Sonic suggests they should order pizza and Rose knows a great place, because of course she does. And Shadow was preparing to make an excuse – but then Sonic looks at him, one eyebrow raised.

…So, they're all going to Sonic's place.

Shadow complies only because he doesn't know what Sonic's thinking, and that's never good.

When they get to the house Sonic drags them all to the living room and puts on all the lights. Amy claims an armchair and gets her phone out, starting to chat with someone, presumably ordering those pizzas. Tails pulls out that yellow device he's always messing with and slumps on the couch, and Knuckles looks once at Shadow before leaning back into his own chair and seemingly falling asleep. He's not.

Shadow goes over to the bookshelf and starts inspecting their books because he doesn't want to discuss anything. He doesn't know how he would actually explain. There's not a lot to say, and even less he feels inclined to. Unfortunately nearly all the books are about engineering or physics, and he can see Sonic inching his way over toward him.

"Shadow," Sonic starts, and Shadow sighs and puts down The Basics of Chaos Engineering. "In the base- you got shot?" it's somehow pronounced like a question.

"I got shot," Shadow agrees.

"And now…" Sonic looks at him. Looks down at his stomach specifically. "It's like nothing happened… it has something to do with your blood, hasn't it?"

"I'm the Ultimate Lifeform," Shadow says vaguely, and picks up another book. The Sword in the Stone. Huh.

"I'm just curious."

Shadow glances up. "What?"

"If you don't want to tell me, it's a-okay." Sonic says, looking at him in a way which makes Shadow feel things. "I'm just… You're sure you don't need medical attention?"

Shadow rolls his eyes. "No. I heal fast. It's a thing."

Sonic's lips quirk at the brutal understatement. He still says, "Okay. I meant – you didn't get any oil in your wound or something?"

"I can't be poisoned." Shadow says. Not, I'm immune to all diseases, too.

"Alright," Sonic concedes. Seems he realised Shadow's utter lack of interest to continue this particular discussion.

"Hey guys," Amy announces from her armchair, "The pizzas will be here in twenty minutes! Who wants something to drink?"

Shadow and Knuckles both say that they can just take water, while Sonic has a minor epiphany remembering that he's got a blender, and proceeds to cheerfully make smoothies for everyone together with Amy. Tails springs up from the sofa as soon as he hears the blender starting, and rushes into the kitchen to stop them from pouring chili on everything. They start bickering, and Shadow watches them with Knuckles. He catches himself wearing the same fond exasperated smile as Knuckles and while it's incredibly jarring – he realises that he's content. Hanging out with Team Sonic. It reminds him of weekend outings with Rouge's team of agents…

Shadow didn't make a big deal of it at all, so Sonic tries to drop it too. Unfortunately being a reckless adventure-seeking teenager who doesn't care about dangers unless others get involved, makes Shadow's latest trick seem really cool. Fascinating, let's stick with that. Sonic gets kinda stuck on the idea of Shadow being invincible. Does Sonic never need to worry about him anymore? Does it cover everything, paper-cuts to third-degree burns? …Does this mean Shadow is immortal?

That's such a weird thought.

A week later, after racing through the forest and sparring by the coast, Sonic actually remembers to ask, "Do you age?" and Shadow gives him such a weird look. Sonic just looks back expectantly and repeats, "Do you?"

"I don't know. I've spent the majority of my life in cryostasis."

"How was it?"

Shadow stares very flatly at him. "Cold. Similar to sleeping. Why all the questions?"

"You didn't mind it when I was asking about your favourite sweets," Sonic defends himself.

Shadow rolls his eyes. Sonic almost smiles at that, but Chaos that'd be weird. Nevermind that he's already got a crush.

He can't say that he wants to die, because he absolutely doesn't – Shadow just wants to have that choice, wants to know that he could die. That existing forever isn't his only option. There's no way for him to test whether or not – so he just has to accept that he'll never know until it's too late. The Professor seemed pretty damn sure that Shadow wasn't going to die of anything as simple as age or diseases or wounds, and the Professor ought to have known the best.

-he wasn't even going to consider Black Doom. He's dead anyway, so even if he knew more about his blood, it doesn't matter now. It's quickly apparent Shadow can't solve this problem, so for the time being it's easier to just ignore it. Especially since Rouge and Omega never bring it up (why would they) and curiously even Sonic lets Shadow have his peace on this. They hang out like usual, which means that most of it consists of racing or fighting or Sonic getting Shadow to try some dubious new food. (and it's good, it's great – Sonic is frighteningly… charming)

Rouge convinces Shadow to start helping her at the club on weekends, and approximately three weeks after What Happened At The Base Sonic shows up at briefly, orders nothing, and quickly disappears. Work at GUN is boring. The Doctor causes a minor disaster in Mystic Ruins, but Sonic handles the situation by himself in under fifteen minutes and Shadow only hears about it the day after, when they're trying some stuffed peppers dish at a discreet little Apotoan place.

"Hey," Sonic then asks brightly, when they're all finished with the peppers. "This was really fun! How about we do this tomorrow?"

"Again? Really?" Shadow is actively trying to sound fond and not just sarcastic, but he's probably getting the inflection all wrong.

"Yeah," Sonic says. He picks at a napkin. "Unless you're busy. I'd – I mean. Just friends getting lunch. Or…" he trails off, glancing at Shadow through his lashes all hopeful and smooth. "You wanna… go on date?"

"I…" Shadow clears his throat and then- then what. How is he supposed to respond to blatant flirting? Fuck this. He wants this, underneath all that other shit, which there's tons of. He replies, voice almost completely steady, "I'd love to go on a date."

Twenty-six hours later, in an eating establishment called Ella's restaurant, halfway through their somethings-with-shrimp, ice-creams and two sodas, and Shadow realises this has to stop. Sonic's smirks, his sweet smiles, usual jokes. Sitting so close in a booth, underneath the strings of lights hanging from the ceiling – the flash of yellow against the blinds every time a car went by, the pop songs fading to a background hum, Sonic briefly holding his hand. It's too much. It's so very, very enjoyable, and-

Shadow makes his breaths slow and even.

Stupid. Everything is good, in this moment, and he just keeps thinking of how it's going to end. It has to. Nothing could ruin this-

-except for him.

Not one to mince words, Shadow uses the first available lull in the conversation to say: "I don't think this – us dating – is a good idea."

-Shadow's gaze involuntarily cuts to the side in the inevitable long moment of stillness. Shadow can feel his pulse beating fast – he doesn't want to think about why. Just get it over with. They've had this perfect, careful balance for months now, of very nice and manageable still developing friendship, and then. Then this, then Shadow thinking he make it work, thinking about the future and the past and realising that no, he can't do this.

"Then why…" Sonic trails off into quiet. "Why'd you say yes?"

"I don't know." That's not good enough, he can't leave it at that. He needs to explain. He has to- "I'm immortal. You're not. I cannot die, while you-"

"Is this a problem?" Sonic sounds almost honestly confused. "I'll never have to worry about you getting hurt, right? And hey-"

"You're going to die, be it natural causes or by being killed, while I'll still be young and unchanged and immortal-"

"So you're," Sonic throws up a hand to stop Shadow's angry rant, food forgotten, "You don't want to date me, because… I could die? Sometime in the distant future?" He still looks mostly annoyed and disbelieving, but yet Shadow looks at him and knows he's hurt him. "That's… if I was immortal I'd make the best of it. I wouldn't let it hang over me, or – I don't know. What do you want?"

He nearly spits out to be mortal. He nearly says you. "I don't want you to die."

"Everyone dies, Shadow!"

That's it. No matter what Shadow does the ones he loves will die, and he can't stop it, because he should be dying with them but Chaos what if he can't? What if he literally cannot die? Sonic is the funniest, most annoying yet lovable person Shadow has ever met, could even think of. He's the brightest thing that's ever happened to Shadow after Maria. His throat feels clogged with guilt and anger, and hey, Maria again, but if he ever loses Sonic like that then- then-

(you're not allowed to feel sad about something you've ruined yourself)

Shadow stands up, pushes in his chair, and Sonic says softly, almost to himself, "Use the time you have, that's how we do it."

Shadow can't answer. Sonic's eyes follow him as Shadow pays and leaves, and that's their date.

So Rouge calls him an idiot, brings out some drinks, and that's the rest of the night.

The rain is splattering loudly against the window when he wakes.

Okay, so he could start ranting about Shadow, or he could have breakfast. And he only has energy for one of those things, so pancakes it is.

Tails is in the kitchen when he gets downstairs. Tails glances up from his Miles Electric only to give him a Look, so Sonic turns his back to him and starts to pull out flour and sugar from the cupboard.

"Morning, Sonic. I take it last night…?"

Sonic grunts. "Yeah. No thanks, let's talk about something else. Did you know Cream has started taking martial arts classes?"

"Vanilla mentioned it. She's going to the same place as Amy – Amy even recommended it! Now what did Shadow do last night?"

So, they're doing this now. Great. Sonic slumps, miserably stirring the pancake mixture, and says, "Shadow doesn't want to date me 'cuz he thinks I'm going to die."

"Well." Tails pauses. See, that's how dumb this situation is: even Tails doesn't know what to say. Sonic should give up on Shadow as fast as possible, shouldn't he? "He probably needed time to think. You know him better than I do, but… considering that he lost everyone back on the ARK…"

"And I'm really hard to kill! I won't die in front of him!"

"Did you say that?" Tails gives him another one of his Looks, and Sonic realises the pancakes need more attention. He should probably put on the stove, too.

"Basically, yeah. It's just-" Shadow's maddening and stubborn. He has his reasons. He's being a complete arsehole- but okay, yeah, Maria. "What am I supposed to do about it?"

From another room, It doesn't matter suddenly starts playing. It takes him a moment to remember it's his phone, but when he does- his stomach clenches with hope and apprehension, and he quickly lets Tails take control of the pancake situation…

His phone. He doesn't use it that much, so when he digs it out of the sofa he stares at it for a moment. Though that's mostly because of the caller, who is, of course, Shadow, because once Sonic has become interested in something it never goes away and will instead haunt him for the rest of eternity and- okay, yeah, he feels completely giddy over the fact that Shadow's calling. Dammit.

Sonic answers his phone, and Shadow's voice says a very neutral, "Hello."

"Shadow." It comes out loaded, the word heavy on his tongue. Some intestine is twisting around in his gut.

A hesitant question follows; "…Can we talk?"

The apartment is quiet in that way when there's only one person home. "Rouge and Omega are away," Shadow says simply, and leads Sonic through a darkened hall into an open living room with sturdy brick walls and a tiny for-the-aesthetic kitchenette in the corner. Sunlight does its best to force its way through the blinds, and the fridge hums comfortingly. When Sonic takes a seat in the sofa next to Shadow, he notices a bunch of magazines and papers spread on the table, but they all appear to be Rouge's.

"So," Sonic begins, because it's a beginning as good as any, and sprawls on the sofa to hide the fact that he's actually nervous.

"I owe you an apology," Shadow starts. "I shouldn't have agreed to dinner with you, I shouldn't have left you. I'm sorry."

Sonic holds his breath. "Is… that it? That's why you wanted to talk?"

Shadow's looking at the floor now. Red carpet, spotless apart from the papers and a wrinkled empty snack bag. "No," he murmurs. "Rouge told me some things, and I… You're so kind." Shadow looks up just to stare helplessly at him, like he's forgotten his point but- "You're reckless, you're a bit of idiot, you're stubborn-"

"Right back at you, pal-"

"-and you're sweet, and you're right. Even if I'm immortal, I should… enjoy this. What I have." Shadow huffs. "You're – why? Why did you give me- why are you always befriending people who've-" Shadow cuts himself off. "It doesn't matter. I wouldn't be able to handle it if you got hurt-"

"-and I won't. If you're so worried then stick by me, watch my back." This discussion is getting frustrating. Sonic feels jittery and restless and he just needs Shadow to understand. I'm not made of glass, what the hell. "Here," Sonic says, and in a fit of inspiration grabs Shadow hand, presses it to his own chest, "Here, see, I'm alive. Alive, and I'll be alive for a long time," his pulse beats against Shadow's palm, and Sonic finishes in a whisper, "and I'm damn hard to kill, which you know, so please,-"

He doesn't know who starts it but it hits them both with equal force. Shadow's mouth is warm and so's the rest of him, so Sonic slides a hand along Shadow's waist, brushing across his abdomen – and then his hand slows. The skin really is perfectly smooth: no scars, nothing. Even the fur is soft and even. That's kinda crazy right, because the shots literally went-

-Sonic lets out a vaguely hissing noise when Shadow's free hand goes caressing over the back of his neck, which reminds Sonic that he's still keeping Shadow's hand on his heart – man, his pulse has got to be so fast right now. Okay, forget about everything else. He slides his hand up through Shadow's quills and then pulls back abruptly, takes a gulp of air and the second to say: "So do you still care about lifespans or are we past-"

"We're having a moment, Sonic." Shadow sounds perfectly deadpan even while draped over Sonic, lips red and wet. "'Use the time you've got', didn't you say-"

"Oh shut up." Sonic grins and kisses him again.