Chapter 1

Simon

I walk to work in the rain by myself.

There's no snow yet, but it's cold and windy. I still run pretty warm so I'm fairly comfortable despite the crap weather, but I don't run as hot as I did when I had my magic. My hands are stuffed deep in my pockets because I forgot my gloves. I'm wearing my waterproof down jacket (that Penny's mum bought me) over my jeans and hoodie with a tee shirt underneath (Baz's I think), and a black wool beanie (that I stole from Baz).

I stifle a yawn as I walk. I didn't sleep that well last night, another nightmare. I notice the Christmas decorations on the street and shop windows, their reflections make shimmering patterns on the wet pavement. Makes sense, since it's almost Christmas. I've been ignoring this fact for a while now given what happened last Christmas, and Penny and Baz haven't talked about their plans yet which makes it easy for me to ignore. They haven't talked about their plans in front of me anyway.

I don't usually make a habit of not thinking about things anymore. My magickal psychologist says I should think about everything, even if it hurts, so I know I'll think about it eventually. There's still a whole week to go, plenty of time to think and to shop.

My magickal psychologist has helped me work through all the things that happened last year. We talk a lot. Between her and Penny and Baz, I get loads of talking done so it's impossible not to think about things. We spent the first six months discussing what happened last year in detail, and by the summer we'd moved onto talking about my nightmares which I still have most nights, like last night. She rattled off a list of random things to try out, to tire me out so maybe I could sleep better. I scoffed when she said them; running, dancing, mediation, yoga, life drawing, sex.

I blushed when she said the last one. I think she could see me blushing through my laptop.

Baz and I started running that summer. He's still just as fast as ever and my wings and tail don't get in the way that much so I can usually keep up. And I do sleep better after a run, but that's probably because I'm so exhausted.

Penny and I tried meditation for a while. We found a Mindfulness Meditation class at university that fit into both our schedules so we thought we'd give it a go, if nothing else I thought it might be good for a lark. We weren't that great at it though, because every time I tried to relax and let my mind go or whatever I was supposed to do, I could hear Penny huffing and mumbling about it being such a waste of her valuable study time and then I would start giggling and then she would start giggling and then the instructor would give us serious (but mindful) looks. We made it through the six weeks but only barely.

We tried yoga for the next six weeks and I realised that even though I have wings and a tail that should help my balance, they didn't, which made Penny giggle even more than the meditation class and made me fall over a lot. Penny must have enjoyed it enough because she enrolled for the full year. I didn't bother.

After the yoga class I found a beginners life drawing class. It was on at the same time as Baz has football practice so I thought it was worth giving a go. (He's playing for his uni, of course he made the A grade team.) I didn't tell Penny or Baz about it because I felt a bit naff taking the class, but since the weather's gotten colder Baz and I haven't been running as much I needed the distraction.

Turns out I'm pretty decent at it, which came as a bit of a shock to me. The teacher explained what to do, how to break down the work into easy steps; how to look at a figure, plan the drawing, sketch it out and draw the whole pose, and to add shadows and highlights. The first week our model was a girl, probably a student or something, and then the next week it was a bloke. By the end of the six weeks my teacher said my drawings were pretty good and I was enjoying it and after an hour and a half I was exhausted from concentrating and I didn't have any nightmares after. So I re-enrolled for the not so beginners' class and bought myself some pencils and charcoals and a blank art book. I haven't told Baz or Penny about the art class yet. I don't think they'll take the piss or anything, I just want to make sure I'm going to stick with it before I tell them.

And I didn't mention the dancing or the sex to either of them yet. I'd never hear the end of that.

Winter break has started so I'm working more shifts at the café. It's not like I have anything else planned, and I need the money. I found this part time job just before summer and worked like mad to save for rent and stuff. It's not much, just making coffees and sometimes helping with the food but it pays the rent and lets me buy food and just about covers the bills and it's only a five minute walk from our flat.

Penny has a part time job too, two jobs actually, or really three. She's working at the university library and she's tutoring students from the local high school on weeknights and she's also tutoring Watford students on weekends. She figured she tutored me all the way through for free so she may as well get paid for it. She's very good at it and her students seem to like her. All three jobs fit in with her studies and she says she misses Micah less when she's busy.

First semester at uni went well but I still don't have a clue what I want to do. I picked some general subjects to see what I like or what I'm good at, it was great to finally start after seven months of not doing very much of anything.

The coven organised a scholarship to cover my fees and books. I said no at first, but Penny and Baz and even Professor Bunce talked me down.

"You need this," Penny said.

"You deserve this," Baz said.

"You saved our realm, it's the least we can offer," Professor Bunce said.

In the end I just gave in, it was easier than arguing with them. And I couldn't really afford to say no.

I didn't actually save our realm. I think I was just cleaning up my own mess. I got rid of the Insidious Humdrum, which was just a super-villain version of me that I created anyway. I got rid of it by filling it with my magic, all of it. Not that my magic ever felt like mine anyway, it always felt too much, and borrowed.

I'm almost at work now. If I still had my magic I could cast a weatherization spell to keep my legs dry, where the umbrella doesn't cover, but since I lost it I've had to do things the Normal way. Not that I ever used magic on myself anyway, that was way too risky. If I tried to keep the rain off me I probably would have blown the entire storm half way across the continent.

And I probably could have done that without my wand. I didn't even use my wand in those last few months. I just had to think things and they happened. Penny says that that I shouldn't have been able to do that. (You're not a genie she said.) I shouldn't have been able to just wish things and make them happen. Like my wings and tail, there's no spell for that. There were no spells for most of the stuff I did towards the end, I had so much power, it's like I was magic.

I get to work and get ready in the staff room, shoving my wet jacket on a hanger. I give my wings one big stretch before I close them tight. I can usually keep my wings and tail out of everyone's way while I work. Not that anyone can see them, Penny spelled them invisible before I left as usual, but they're still there which means people can trip over them so I still have to be careful. That's easier said than done sometimes, I can control my wings but I swear my tail has a mind of its own.

I gave myself the wings and tail before I lost my magic, then I couldn't get rid of them because I lost my magic. Who knew?

When I get to work I say hi to Alex and the others. My boss's name is Alexandra but she hates it, says it takes too long to say. (Too many syllables.) She owns the café and she's a great cook and she's a decent boss too. She's small and energetic and has short black hair like a pixie, but she's not a pixie, Penny said.

We talk about the rain but we don't bother with any proper conversation today. She's like that, not fussed if I don't want to talk so we get along fairly well. And there are lots of customers today so I need to get to work. I like the people I work with well enough and I've made a few friends in my classes (acquaintances anyway), but I must be turning into Penny because I don't really want any more than two friends anymore. I've been working here for five months and have been at uni for a semester and I haven't made any other friends. I get to work making coffee and listen to the hum of customers chatter.

Baz

"Baz?"

"Bunce."

"We need to talk about Simon and Christmas."

Simon just left for work and I was about to head back to Oxford to visit my family and hunt but Bunce corners me as I'm putting on my coat.

"I think you mean we need to talk to Simon about Christmas Bunce," I correct, because I'm a prick.

"Don't be a smartarse Baz."

"Simon is an adult, he can do whatever he likes." I don't look at her as I wrap my scarf around my neck. I don't want to get into this now.

Bunce is standing, she probably has her hands on her hips and I assume she is glaring at me but I still haven't look at her. "Simon can't be left alone at Christmas Baz, even you know that! He's been avoiding talking about it and you know Simon doesn't not talk about anything so it must be bothering him." This has a strange logic to it and I can't deny that she's right. I take my time buttoning up my coat, still avoiding her eyes.

"Well?" she demands, "Have you discussed your plans with him yet?"

I sneer at the wall. I haven't talked to Simon about Christmas yet. I'm not entirely sure how to approach it. My family is expecting me to spend Christmas with them of course, and I want Simon to come too.

Things are better with my family with regard to Simon. They no longer want to kill him which is an improvement. My father can't deny that Simon saved our entire realm when he ended the Humdrum, and the Mage. (Even if that was an accident.) He also can't deny that Simon helped me discover that the Mage was behind my mother's murder, and my kidnapping. So even though my father can't quite accept that Simon is my boyfriend, that I even have a boyfriend, he tolerates him well enough.

Daphne likes Simon because he's polite and makes me smile (a lot), and he plays with Mordelia and the twins and even my baby brother whenever he comes to the house.

Fiona likes him for all of those reasons but especially because he ended the Mage, and that he is my boyfriend.

"So let me get this straight Basil, you're dating the Mage's Heir? The Chosen One?" she smirked at me when I finally told her.

"Yes Fiona, you know I am."

"Simon bloody Snow."

"Yes."

"And all those years we were plotting to take him down, you were actually mad for him?" she asked, cocking her eyebrow at me.

"Yes Fiona, you already know all this."

She howled out a laugh this time. "I still can't believe it Basil, of all the blokes in the realm, couldn't you pick another bloke to fall for, any other bloke?"

"Obviously not Fiona."

"So, the Mage's Heir?"

"Yes Fiona. Can we drop this now?"

I've had this conversation with my ridiculous aunt a number of times.

I finally look at Bunce. "No. I haven't yet," I sneer at her again.

"Well, we need to do it tonight," Bunce insists, "Because Christmas is next week. And I just received a text from Agatha, she's coming back to London for Christmas and wants to catch up."

I roll my eyes. Brilliant.

Penny

I just received at text from Agatha. She's coming back to see her family over the Christmas break and asked if it was okay to see me and Simon. This will be her first time back to London in a year, since everything happened.

I don't blame her when she left, after all the Mage nearly killed her. She was stupidly brave to go to the Mage all by herself and if anything had happened to her I never would have forgiven myself. I dragged her into the whole mess in the first place, making her come with me to Baz's place on Christmas Eve to help us solve the mystery of Baz's mother's murder. She was furious and fed up that we were even there– working with Baz rather than against him– and that Baz was, in fact, a vampire. I just realised that's probably the last time she saw Simon, after we left Baz's place when he jumped out of her car in the middle of the Hampshire countryside on our way back to London, saying that he had to go back and make sure Baz was okay.

I smiled when the text arrived. I do miss her. We kept in contact once she left, although not very often and she refuses to talk about what happened or magic in general. So our conversations have mainly been about our studies, California, Micah and the weather.

And I haven't made any new friends yet, I haven't really tried. I have a few study partners that are nice enough, and Normal enough, and the people at work are nice enough. I tend to have lunch on my own or with Simon if our timetables allow it. Simon is the best friend I could possibly have and Baz is brilliant company but I do miss having a girlfriend.

After Agatha text me I started thinking about all our years together at Watford and our crazy (and mostly dangerous) adventures, and then I thought about how easy it was let friendships end if you don't keep nurturing them, and I felt a little nostalgic. I suggested Christmas Eve Eve. Dinner, at our flat.

Simon hasn't mentioned Christmas to me or Baz yet. Baz hasn't mentioned Christmas to Simon yet. I haven't mentioned Christmas to Simon yet.

Agatha doesn't know about Simon and Baz yet.

This could go either way.

Simon

Baz walks in at the end of my shift, right on time. He does this a lot since I started working here and he moved to London. He moved into Fiona's flat, well it's technically his flat now, when he finished at Watford. He didn't have to move in until he started at the London School of Economics at the end of summer really, but then he took some music classes in London and it made sense. I'm glad he did, I like having him close by.

And it turned out to be a bloody good summer.

He says he comes to my work because he wants a coffee and to walk home with me. I think he just wants to make sure I get home safe. I think he thinks that because I don't have magic any more I'll be in some sort of mortal danger on my five minute walk home. Sometimes he forgets I grew up in an orphanage (lots of different orphanages) and can take care of myself.

And it's not as if any dark creatures are after me anymore. The goblins elected their king finally without killing me off which was a relief, and with the Humdrum gone there's nothing around to send dragons or flibbertigibbets or any other creature after me. Things have been blissfully quiet for the last year.

I can't help grinning at Baz when he comes in. My tail swings towards him and I have to grab it before it knocks anything over, which looks kind of weird because it's invisible. I make him a Pumpkin mocha breve and hand it over to him. (I think it tastes like crap but he likes it.) I tell him I'll just grab my stuff as I walk to the staff room. He smiles at me and leans back against the wall, drink in hand, legs crossed. He's wearing his black wool coat and a new grey scarf and nice leather gloves. But no hat (I've got that), so his hair is in soft black waves down to his cheeks. He looks so handsome, as usual. He obviously cast a weatherization spell on himself because he's not carrying an umbrella and it's still raining lightly outside.

I say goodnight to everyone as I grab Baz's hand and walk out of the café. He bins his empty drink on the way out. I think the spell is still working because I don't need my umbrella. Baz hands me my gloves.

"You forgot these," he says.

"Oh yeah, thanks Baz," I grin back at him. I pull on the gloves and relink our hands. When I give him a quick kiss on the cheek, his eyes widen as he smiles at me.

"You're welcome," he says, smiling shyly. "Nice hat."

"Yes isn't it?" I straighten my hat with my free hand.

"How was work?" he asks.

"Normal," I say. This is my standard response, it means I didn't knock anything or anyone over with my wings or tail. "How was your day?"

"Fine, Mordelia says hi." I grin at that, and we walk the next block in silence. "So," he starts, "Bunce cornered me the second you left today–"

I cut him off. "What about this time?" I ask, still smiling at him. I can't help it, Baz makes me smile.

He glances over to me and hesitates for a second before he speaks. "She wants to talk about your Christmas plans when we get back."

"Oh," I knew this conversation was going to happen eventually, but I didn't think it would be tonight. I stay quiet for a few more steps. "I haven't really thought about it yet."

"I know," Baz says. "We don't have to do anything if you don't want to."

I'm quiet for a bit, so is Baz, and I know he's waiting for me to work out in my head what I want to say, which I appreciate. "No, it's not that," I start, "I do want to, do something that is, but . . ." I trail off, looking at the Christmas decorations in the shop windows again while we walk.

"What is it Simon?"

I love it when he calls me Simon.

"It's just that," I go on, "I'm not that sure what I'm supposed to do this year. You know?"

"Simon–"

"Baz," I cut him off. "It's just that, for years I spent Christmas with the Wellbeloves. It was like a tradition." I feel Baz stiffen next to me. "No wait," I say quickly, "I don't want to do that anymore. I mean, I really like them but I know that's not where I'm meant to be anymore. It's just that I'm not sure where else I'm supposed to be. It's not like I have any family–"

He stops us then, tugging my hand as he turns to face me. He's staring at me, pinning me with his eyes until I start to shuffle uncomfortably. "You do have family, Simon. Me, Penny, my family, the Bunces."

"Your family hates me. Especially after the mess I made last Christmas–"

His lip curls into a small smile. "They don't hate you, they're growing to like you, especially Mordelia."

"She's eight."

"And Fiona."

"Fiona doesn't like me."

"Yes she does. You're a hero in her eyes you know," Baz says confidently. "She specifically said for you to come for Christmas lunch."

I scoff at that, although ever since everything happened she does treat me differently. She still calls me Chosen One, but there's no malice when she says it, more like a term of endearment? And once she dropped off a pile of sour cherry scones to Baz's place, and she doesn't try to spell my feet into the dirt anymore. I guess that's progress? Maybe, but I still don't believe him.

He tugs at my hand and we start walking again.

"She did not," I scoff again. "What did she really say?"

"She said 'Make sure you bring the Chosen One, liven up this dreary Christmas lunch for a change.'" Then he rolls his eyes because he thinks Fiona is ridiculous.

"She's just messing with your dad you know, make him uncomfortable."

"Father said its fine too," he says easily.

"Really? I don't know, he's always looking at me funny, it's kind of creepy."

"That's just him. Anyway I think my step-mother had a word. She's expecting you to come. She likes you too you know."

"What about Penny then?"

"I'm fairly sure she likes you too, Snow."

"Ha ha Baz."

We walk the last block in an easy silence.

"So?" Baz questions as we approach the entrance to my flat. "Christmas day, sorted?"

"Yeah okay Baz, I'll go to your posh Christmas lunch with you."

"Good," he smiles, ignoring my jibe. "You can sort out the rest of your plans with Bunce. She'll be ready to pounce as soon as we get in." He gives me a quick kiss as we head into my building. We climb the stairs, taking off our gloves and relinking our hands as we climb. His hands are cold, they're always cold like the rest of him, vampire cold, but they start to warm up when I hold them. Baz takes off my hat and quickly puts it in his pocket, smirking at me. I comb my free hand through my hair, it gets matted whenever I wear a hat or sleep. I still wear it short on the sides and back and longer on top because I don't know what else to do with it, and I comb my fingers through it now until my curls bounce around.

I'm just about to unlock the door when Baz takes me by my waist and spins me and gently pushes me against the door with his body, holding my forearms. He's smiling at me because he knows he caught me off guard. He looks down at my mouth and then back to my eyes. I'm starting to get a little short of breath as I look into his grey eyes, they're the colour of the deep ocean on a stormy day, not that I've ever actually seen the ocean but I've seen pictures, anyway they're kind of striking. He brushes his lips against mine, gently, and then pulls back a little and looks at me again, pinning me with his eyes. He knows this drives me crazy. We stay like that for a few seconds, neither of us in a hurry to go inside. Then Baz lets go of my forearms and moves his hands down to my waist so I reach up and rake my hands through his hair, because I know that drives him crazy, and because I want to. Then I clench my fists in his hair and pull him back to me for a long, deep kiss.

I know I'm blushing when we get inside my flat.