I wrote a version of this long-hand a while ago when I didn't have access to a computer. Since the story is obviously inside me, I figured I should type it and share it with the world like I did with all the others. Hope someone likes it.


The line went on for miles. I mean that literally. A queue of people, waiting patiently, stretching out to the horizon in either direction. The floor was a grey tile, the sky a cloudy grey, and the light itself had a greyish tinge to it. If one were to imagine the most boring experience possible in all of Creation, this line in this washed-out wasteland would come close. And I was smack dab in the middle of it.

My name is… huh, I forgot. That's just how freaking long I've been in this line. I've forgotten a great many things while standing here for an eternity. I'm really only certain of one thing: this is Death.

I'm not quite sure how I died. Overdose, perhaps? Car accident? In any case, one minute I have a heartbeat and I'm on… my home planet, the next I'm in this line.

I've given up on trying to start conversation. No one seems to hear me. Either everyone in hearing distance had already forgotten how to talk or some magic kept my voice from reaching them. That was a while ago. By this point, I'm not sure I could make a sound if I tried. It had just been so long.

Every now and then, the line would move and I would shuffle forward a step or two. And then it was back to the waiting. I'd run off into the distance, but what would be the point? I couldn't see anything, and there was no guarantee that anything existed in this limbo except the line. Besides, I would lose my place. I'd have to start again at the back and be stuck here even longer.

I never got tired, or sleepy, or hungry. Guess those things are for the living. I just stood there, numb and dumb and silent, waiting for the line to move again.

At some point, in that timeless space, I made it near the front.

I blinked at the person behind the desk. I had the vaguest memory of a movie. I'd always loved movies, tv shows, anime, really all fiction. Those memories had lasted the longest. I wanted to say the guy looked like an Agent, for some reason. Suit and tie, flat expression, sunglasses.

"Next," he would say in a voice as grey as the surroundings. The lucky soul at the front of the line would step forward. They would exchange words I couldn't make out, and then the person would vanish. This process repeated a few dozen times, during which time I relearned how to count, just so I could measure when it would be my turn.

Finally, I stepped forward when he said "Next."

"Soul 4829A1826M0683Q0175G, you have been selected for a Replacement Reincarnation. Do you accept?"

If he'd asked me to suck his dick while I was lowered into a vat of acid, I would have accepted. Anything, ANYTHING, was better than waiting in this line. "Yes," I said.

"We thank you for your service."

And then… how to describe it? The closest I could put it is that I fell asleep. As I slept, I dreamed. I dreamed of a young boy who grew into a man, the adventures he had, the trials he faced, the battles he won. And as I dreamed, I realized it was familiar. And when the dream reached its ending, it started to go in reverse. I saw it all backwards as the story returned to the beginning. And I realized my purpose.

When I woke up, I knew who I had become, and why I was here.

I was now Son Goku, also known as Kakarot. I was now the son of Bardock and the adoptive grandson of Son Gohan. I was now a Saiyan sent to Earth. And some Power that Was had decided the story should go differently.


I settled into my second life easily enough.

I had first woken up in Grandpa Gohan's hut, head wrapped in bandages and the old martial artist overjoyed to see me awake. The coma from the head injury was when original Goku's and my souls were switched, it seemed. That thought kept me humble: something had just lifted out the protagonist's soul and replaced it with mine. Whatever R.O.B. had set this up, I had no intention of pissing it off. Whatever its reason for having me take the idiot hero's place armed with foreknowledge of canon, I would give it one hell of a show.

Any 'personality changes' were explained away by the head injury. I spent a few quiet weeks in bed while the gash in my skull scabbed over, with kindly old Gohan hovering over me with all the love of a grandparent for their blood grandchild. It was really very sweet, how much this hermit cared for the alien boy he'd found in the woods. I eagerly got to know him, and was soon reciprocating his love without having to fake it at all.

Memories of my old life didn't bother me or make me nostalgic, because I had none. Other than remembering The Line and having the events of Dragon Ball, Dragon Ball Z, and Dragon Ball Super downloaded into my brain, I was a clean slate. I couldn't tell you if I had a family, or what I did for a living, or even what species I'd been. All I knew was that this was another chance at life, and I was determined to make the most of it.

Adapting to the body of a four-year-old with a tail was no more difficult than adapting to having a body, period. It felt as natural as anything had ever been. I had a vague understanding that puberty would introduce strange and powerful urges, but for the most part I couldn't tell any difference from being a kid to being a disembodied spirit. And my fifth appendage was handy for washing my back during a bath.

When the day came that Grandpa Gohan undid my bandages and was satisfied I was healed, my training began. I had been bugging my caretaker to train me in Martial Arts almost since I woke up. I explained it away as a desire to be 'cool' like my grandpa, but the truth was more to do with survival.

My power level, if I recalled correctly, was a measly 2. Frieza, at full power, was 120 million. While never measured, Beerus was strong enough to kick Frieza's ass with his little finger. For my own purposes, I'd assume the God of Destruction was worth at least a hundred of Frieza, which would put him in the range of 10 billion or more. And the Angels like Whis were at a level beyond even that.

The gist of it was, I was currently a teeny, tiny krill in an ocean with blue whales. I hadn't exactly been given instructions, but I knew this: I did NOT want to die again. Whether I'd go to the Other World or back to The Line, I didn't know. But I was determined to never find out. So, the simplest way to stay alive would be to become the biggest fish. I had a long, LONG way to go, but the journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step, right?

My first step was learning Grandpa Gohan's version of the Turtle Hermit Style.

So, I trained. I learned how to throw a punch and a kick. I learned how to push my body to the limits and then go even further. I learned to hunt, and track, and live off the land. Grandpa Gohan taught me well. We spared frequently, as much for fun as for training. As much as he taught me how to fight, he also taught me to be at peace. I had to meditate for hours at a time, which I put up much less of a fuss to than your average kid would do. If I learned one thing from The Line, it was patience. During these times where I emptied my mind and tried to be at one with the universe, I began to feel the first stirrings of what I assumed were ki inside me. I'd yet to manifest it, but I assumed it would come eventually so long as I kept at it.

A few months in, I snuck out after bedtime. I wandered about a mile into the forest until I found a clearing. Once there, I meditated for a good hour, trying to become as serene as possible. When I was ready, and my eyes still closed, I looked up.

I could FEEL the moonlight on my lids. My tail got all tingly, and goosebumps popped up on my flesh. Somewhere deep inside me, I felt a beast begin to stir. I knew I was taking a risk by doing this. But the Oozaru form was just too damn useful and underappreciated. Better to work on it when I was a pipsqueak and relatively harmless even with a 10x power boost than later when I'd be at risk of blowing up the planet.

With great hesitance, and fighting to keep myself as calm and relaxed as possible, I opened my eyes a crack.

Have you ever been angry? Really, truly angry? Seeing red, blood pounding in your veins, hearing a ringing angry? The kind of angry that feeds on itself, taking over every neuron in your brain, until nothing matters but acting on that anger? Combine that with the hazy, liberating buzz of being drunk, and you might come close to how it felt for a Saiyan to look at the full moon. And I wasn't even getting a direct view of it.

I had a split second of clarity and closed my eyes.

My teeth felt too big for my mouth and I had hair in places that it shouldn't be. As seconds passed and I resisted the temptation to just let go and open my eyes, I felt my body return to normal, reverting to its ordinary toddler form.

Right. Well, that was something. It honestly scared me, the power of the reactions that little dose of Blutz waves evoked from me. But if a hothead like Vegeta could control it, I sure as HFIL would!

I snuck glimpses until dawn, meditating after each one and lasting just a little longer before I panicked and closed my eyes before losing control. Exhausted, I made my way back to the hut.

"Son Goku! Where have you been, young man? I was worried sick!"

Oops. Forgot about Grandpa.

It took a lot of explaining, during which I brought up that I had started to 'remember' things from before my incident. Like how I was an alien, and that I had been sent to destroy all life on the planet. I assured Grandpa Gohan that I had no intention of doing any such thing, but one of the keys to doing it was the Oozaru form. Grandpa was against me training something so dangerous, but I talked him around. "It's a part of who I am, Grandpa. I want to master it, the same way you're teaching me to master myself. And anyway, what if I look at the moon by accident and can't control it? I could hurt you and a lot of other people."

"Well… very well. But no more sneaking off alone. We'll do this with me to supervise you. And if you ever lose control, I'm cutting off your tail right then and there. You said that would turn you back to normal, right?"

"Yeah," I said, curling my tail around to cuddle it. "But could you please make sure I'm actually gone before you do it? I don't want to lose my tail."

"Of course, Goku."

The years passed, with my days filled with training and mountain life shenanigans, and one night a month working on safely and sanely transforming into a giant ape creature. There were a couple of near-misses, but I managed to keep my head and stay in control each time. When turning into the Oozaru felt no different than being Saiyan, I worked on transforming back despite the pull of the moon and even on transforming outside the full moon. I wanted to completely master the form. It was the same principle as Super Saiyan Full Power, right? When I could look at the full moon and not even blink, when I could transform in broad daylight and keep my power level as calm and still as a pond, then I would have mastered the Oozaru form.

I had plans to be this exacting and thorough for EVERY transformation. That was one of the things I didn't like about the original Goku. He never repeated what he did with the original Super Saiyan transformation for Super Saiyan 2 or 3 or God or Blue. And speaking of Blue, if it were possible to combine the Super Saiyan and the God transformations, why not Super Saiyan and Oozaru? Oozaru and God? All three at once? I was going to find transformations that no one in canon had even imagined, and I was going to work at them tirelessly until they were as easy and effortless as blinking.

I would train constantly as if the fate of the world, the galaxy, all twelve Universes depended on me, because they kind of did. Or would, at some point in the future provided I didn't change too many things, and probably even if I did. I would work as if Cell would arrive the next day. When I was exhausted and wanted to quit, I'd picture Zen-Oh's smiling face as he wiped an entire Universe, trillions of lives, out of existence. Damn it, I would kick Frieza's ass in base form if I had my way.

Grandpa Gohan was a mixture of proud and concerned at my work ethic. He watched me train until I bled and consider it just the warm-up, and was filled with as much worry as admiration. I would just smile and say "I want to be the best that I can be. How can I find it if I don't go looking for it?" And he would smile and shake his head and caution me to not push myself too far, which I would anyway.

I managed to beat Grandpa in an all-out fight by the time I was 8, including the use of ki attacks. Once I started consistently handing him his ass, he shook his head and declared he had nothing left to teach me. By my own estimation, using my ki sense and comparing it to those around me, I was at 100. That still left me orders of magnitude away from where I KNEW I could be, but it was a start. From then on, I focused mostly on honing my technique and boosting my strength, trying to eke out as much progress as I could from Earth's original gravity.

I could have gone searching for Bulma to build me a gravity room or gathered the Dragon Balls (which I had learned to sense), but I didn't. I didn't want to toss canon completely out the window. And, I admit, a part of me wanted to enjoy my 'childhood' alone with Grandpa for as long as I could. So, I focused on maintaining my strength once it peaked and refining my fighting style. I reverse-engineered all the ki techniques I could. I had fun, when I wasn't hammering myself on the anvil of training.

And so, the days passed, until it was the 1st of September, Age 749.


Grandpa Gohan and I were having lunch, a fish I had gone and fetched myself. Around us, my Multiforms cut wood, cleaned the hut, and tended to the garden. Incredibly handy, the ability to make copies of yourself. It was a bit of a headache when we fused and I had to process their memories, but it was definitely worth it.

My ears picked up. "I hear something. An engine, I think."

Grandpa perked up. "Oh? Who'd be way out here in the wilderness?"

The noise vanished, to be replaced by vocal complaints. "Ugh! I hate nature! I definitely didn't wear the right shoes for this."

Grandpa and I exchanged looks, anime sweat drops on both our brows.

Then a goddess came walking up the path to our hut.

My jaw dropped. The show hadn't done her justice. Or maybe it was different seeing her in real life rather than as a cartoon. Or maybe puberty was striking fast and hard on my 13-year-old body. In any case, I couldn't look away. Her skin was flawless, her hair was the most dazzling shade of blue, and her legs went on forever. Even in a t-shirt and shorts, her figure was breathtaking.

"Hello there!" Grandpa Gohan called out, snapping me out of my daze. I quickly regained my cool, fighting down certain… physical reactions. When I wouldn't embarrass myself, I stood up alongside Grandpa. We both bowed as the girl came close. "My name is Son Gohan, and this is my grandson, Goku. Who are you, young lady?"

The girl wiped her brow, honestly out of breath climbing the small hill between the road and our hut. "Hi. My name's Bulma. Nice to meet you. You got anything to drink?"

I wordlessly handed her a cup of tea, and paid a lot of attention to her throat as she gulped it down. Grandpa smacked my head too fast for her to see. I looked away, blushing. Damn hormones. "What's a city girl doing all the way up here in the mountains?"

She grinned, wiping her mouth. "I'm on a treasure hunt!" She reached into her bag, pulling out an orange orb with red stars in the center. "Have either of you seen a jewel like this? There should be one nearby."

"Oh my! Goku, it's just like that one I found years ago, before you even got here! Go get it."

"Yes, Grandpa," I replied obediently. I went into the hut, gathering the 4-Star Ball from where it was stashed on a little shrine we'd made for it. I came out and Bulma's eyes lit up.

"Yes, you do have it! Another Dragon Ball!"

"Dragon Ball? Is that what these things are called?" I asked innocently.

Bulma got a calculating gleam in her eyes. Coming to a decision, she pulled out another Dragon Ball and laid them on the stump I'd been sitting on. I walked forward and added the one in my hand. The three of us watched as they began to pulse with an inner light.

"Dear me, it's never done that before," Gohan said, leaning forward with interest.

"These are the magical Dragon Balls," Bulma explained. "There are only seven of them in the whole world. If you gather them all together and say the ancient words, the dragon will appear and grant you a wish!"

"Wow," I said, more taken with how her face lit up than the explanation of the power I already knew about.

"Well, thanks for giving it to me!" she said, reaching forward.

My eyes narrowed and I grabbed the 4-Star Ball back. "Hey, wait a minute. This is my Grandpa's treasure. You can't just take it."

She got an ugly smile on her face. She pulled out a revolver and held it in Grandpa's general direction. "Hand it over kid, or the old man gets it!"

Grandpa's face closed off. Faster than her eyes could see, he raced over and grabbed the gun right out of her hands. He unloaded it and threw it on the ground behind him before Bulma even realized it was gone. "Now that's very rude. You just don't threaten old men with guns, young lady. It's very unbecoming."

Bulma gaped. "What the hell?"

"Grandpa and I are really strong," I supplied 'helpfully'.

Bulma suddenly looked very nervous. "Um…. ha ha ha! Wasn't that funny? The way I pretended to be all evil and you were so awesome? I wasn't really going to shoot him. I was just trying to scare you. Silly me, hee hee hee."

Grandpa sighed. "Let this be a lesson to you, young Bulma. Those who threaten violence will often be met with violence. Had you pulled that act with anyone else with our skills, you'd likely be in very big trouble right now."

She gulped. "Um, yeah. Sorry about that. Thanks for not killing me or anything."

"I have an idea," I spoke up. "Grandpa and I help you gather up these Dragon Balls. We'll be your bodyguards or whatever. In return, we all share the wish at the end."

Bulma gaped. "Wait, seriously? You want to help me, after what I just did?"

"It's not like Grandpa was really in any danger. He could have caught the bullets if you shot at him," I said casually, making her eyes widen. "And yeah. You seem pretty weak, and you'll probably run into trouble gathering the rest of these Dragon Balls if they're as special as you say. It would bother me if we let you go on your way all helpless and something happened to you. So we come along, keep an eye on each other, and get a wish at the end of it. Sounds like a good deal to me."

Bulma smiled, and I had to hide how my heart jumped. Seriously, what was WRONG with me? "That sounds awesome, actually. I'd really appreciate it."

Grandpa Gohan nodded. "I agree. With one exception. I won't be coming along."

"Grandpa?" I asked, confused. He was perfectly able to travel.

"I'm old, Goku. I had my fill of adventure. I'm perfectly happy to stay here for the rest of my days. But you should go with this young woman. Go out, see the world, make mistakes, learn from them. It's time you flew the nest."

I hugged my grandfather in every way that mattered, tears in my eyes. Then I rubbed my eyes, sniffed my nose, and turned to Bulma. "Well, we're burning daylight. Let's go."

Bulma nodded, gathering up the Dragon Balls and putting them in her bag. I handed over the 4-Star Ball, which she took hesitantly. Then she pulled out a case of capsules, throwing one to produce a motorcycle in a puff of smoke. "Oh, darn, wrong one. We need a side-car."

"No need. I prefer to run."

She looked at me like I was an idiot. "This bike can go over a hundred miles an hour."

I grinned. "I can keep up."

And I did. Bulma watched in disbelief as I kept pace with her bike, my legs blurring as I ran faster than a sprinting cheetah. I could have just flown, but where's the challenge in that? Even this was only marginally difficult because I was wearing the heaviest weighted clothing I could produce with my ki. I wasn't the best at that particular technique, but every little bit helped.

"Wow. How the hell are you so fast?" Bulma called about ten minutes into our journey, after looking away from me to consult the Dragon Radar. I kept the fact that I could sense the energy signature on my own a little secret. Let her feel like she's got an advantage over me for her own peace of mind.

"I trained really hard," I said, not even out of breath.

"Are you even human?"

I laughed. "Actually, no I'm not. But Earthlings can get this strong and fast too. It just takes a lot of hard work and ki manipulation."

Bulma almost swerved off the road. "Wait, what? You're not human? Did you say Earthling? What are you, some sort of alien?"

I chuckled, after I was sure I wouldn't have to save her. "Yeah. Didn't the tail give me away?" I waved it at her.

"I thought you'd just glued it on or something. I didn't know it was real!" She shrieked, reaching a truly uncomfortable decibel. I rubbed my sensitive ear.

"Well, it is."

Bulma's eyes lit up and she slowed down. "Wow. I can't believe it. I'm talking to an actual extraterrestrial. This is like one of Tights' dumb stories!" She eyed me like I was a unicorn and she had the tranquilizer gun all ready. "Mind if I ask you a few questions?"

I leaned subtly away. "Okay. Just promise you won't ask to dissect me or anything."

"Of course not," she said, though her eyes looked a little shifty. "What are you? Where did you come from? When did you come to earth? How? Why?"

I mentally ordered my responses. "Um, a Saiyan. Planet Vegeta. In 739, when I was around 3. In a Saiyan Space Pod. Technically, I was sent here to exterminate all life so the Planet Trade Organization could sell the Earth as real estate, but really my dad sent me to escape the destruction of our planet and train to avenge our people."

"Did you say 'exterminate all life'? Are you serious?"

"I'm afraid so. The Planet Trade Organization is the most powerful entity in the universe. They own most of this galaxy. To them, wiping out a pre-interstellar civilization is like squashing an ant hill. My species, the Saiyans, were enslaved as enforcers a long time ago. I was programmed to be an omnicidal maniac, but then I hit my head as a kid. Grandpa managed to make me fall in love with him and Earth before the memories came back," I explained.

"My god," Bulma said to herself. "This is incredible. You're not making this up, are you?"

"Cross my heart and hope to die. A warrior's word is his honor," I said, quoting something Grandpa had said to me a long time ago.

"Alright then." Bulma kept me busy for hours, asking me all sorts of questions about outer space and the Saiyans. I tried to explain that I only had what I remembered as a baby and what I could scrounge from my Pod's computer, but that barely deterred her.

Finally, the barrage stopped when the sun was beginning to set. "Pit stop!" she said, braking the bike.

I turned and fired a ki blast into the forest.

"What the hell was that?" Bulma demanded.

"There was a bad guy that direction. I took care of him so you wouldn't get kidnapped or anything," I answered.

"Oh… Thanks, I guess." Bulma wandered off in that direction, returning when her business was finished. She had a pale expression, so I guess she saw what my ki ball had done to the pterodactyl-like thing I'd shot down. "That guy could have eaten me! Thanks, Goku."

"No problem, that's why I'm here, to protect the pretty lady on her quest."

She blushed. I blinked. Was she seriously reacting to flirting from a 13-year-old? How experienced was she, exactly? Was this wish for the perfect boyfriend she was after a little girl's fantasy and not the last resort of a jaded woman?

We rode a little more, and I paused when we got near a certain 'rock'. "We should camp here tonight."

"Okay." Bulma capsuled her motorcycle and then produced a capsule house.

"I'm hunting for dinner. Would you like anything?"

Her mouth pursed. "No thanks. I'm fine with the food I packed."

Huh. Guess the city girl wasn't comfortable with food that had been moving an hour earlier.

I ate enough to feed a hungry Saiyan, which is to say enough for twenty men. That done, I walked into the capsule house. Bulma was enraptured by the television, where a handsome man was kissing a beautiful woman. "So romantic," she sighed.

I walked up beside her. "Bulma, can I take a bath? It's been a week since my last one."

"Wait, what? Get in there right now! I'll wash your clothes, just get clean right now!" she yelled, once she processed my words and gave me a sniff.

"Don't bother. They're too heavy for you… or the machine. I'll just destroy them and make new ones."

"How exactly do you plan to do that? I doubt you have a sewing machine on you."

I grinned. "I'll show you after you take your bath, okay?"

I shuffled off to the bathroom, where I gathered my weighted clothing into a ball and atomized them with a controlled ki blast. I then took a quick shower before hopping into the tub.

As I was relaxing, Bulma came up to the door. "Goku? Earlier, you said something about ki manipulation? What is that?"

"Ki is inner energy or life force. It's in everything. If you train at it, you can learn to manipulate it. It's how I made that energy blast and part of why I'm so fast. I channel my ki throughout my body and that makes me stronger and increases my perception speed. I can also use it to do a lot of different techniques. Like the one I'll use to make my new clothes."

"I'll believe it when I see it," Bulma called. "So, tell me more about yourself."

"Not much to tell," I said as I washed my hair. "I'm 13, I love my grandpa, and my hobbies are training and training. Got to get strong if I want to beat Frieza."

"That's the leader of the PTO that destroyed your planet, right? Just how strong is he?"

"Put it this way. There's this thing called Power Level that measures a person's ki. You're a 2, which incidentally is what I was at birth. Grandpa Gohan is about 80, and I'm around 1500, give or take if I go all out. Frieza is 120 million."

"W-what? 120 million? Are you sure you got the numbers right? How is that even possible?" Bulma shouted through the door.

"Biology. His race is notorious for being ridiculously powerful. But I'll beat him one day."

"How? Are you going to use the wish to get super strong?"

I stuck out my tongue even though she couldn't see. "Blegh. No way. Power from a wish isn't earned. I don't want to win like that. I want to train myself the old-fashioned way to the point that I'm stronger than Frieza. And then I'll get even stronger than that, until I'm the best that I can be. It'd be a shame to die without reaching your full potential, don't you think?"

"Yeah, I guess. Are you going to be much longer?"

I got out and flared my aura to evaporate all the water on my body. I wrapped a towel around my waist and walked out. "All done!"

Bulma starred. And drooled.

"Bulma? Are you okay?" I looked down and tried to imagine what she saw. My body fat percentage was in the single digits. My body looked like an anatomical chart, each muscle body pressed flesh up against the surface of my skin. My neck bulged like a tree trunk, my pecs were mesas creating valleys and ridges in my chest, and my abs were like bricks in a paved road leading down to a v-belt sharp enough to cut your finger.

I grinned and flexed my bicep. "Like what you see, Bulma?" I asked teasingly. No way she was actually attracted to me. She was probably just trying to reconcile the cognitive dissonance between my baby face and statuesque body.

She blushed up a storm and rushed past me, slamming the door shut.

I frowned. "Bulma? Are you okay? I was just making fun. I didn't mean to make you mad."

"No, no. I'm fine," she said, though her voice wavered slightly.

I cast my mind for a topic to talk about. "About the wish. How do you want to split it? What were you going to wish for before I came along?"

"Oh. I was going to wish for the perfect boyfriend."

I crossed my arms and leaned against the door. "Couldn't you get that the normal way? Why use a magic wish to get a boy to worship you? You must have them beating down your door."

"Yeah, cause I'm rich and my dad's famous." The bitterness in the words made black coffee seem like cola.

I blinked. "I was going to say beautiful and smart. But I'm sorry if you got the wrong kind of attention. You deserve to have a guy treat you nice."

"Thanks, Goku." I could hear her smile. "What would you wish for?"

I shrugged. "Something we can both use, that we couldn't possibly get by ordinary means. Like immortality or world peace." I had a brainwave. "How about a copy of all the knowledge in the universe? You could use all the technology and science and stuff at your dad's company, and I could use the martial arts and ki techniques to become a better fighter."

"That… that actually sounds awesome! I can't even imagine how advanced alien technology is. Though how would it all be stored? Let me think about it."

"Okay."

I waited a while, Bulma naturally taking longer in the bathroom than I had. She came out with a towel around her and wrapped up in her hair. I carefully avoided looking at her. "So, what's this about making new clothes?"

I focused and held out a finger. A beam of light emerged from it, which coalesced into a gi, pants, and underwear. They made a crater as they crashed from mid-air to the ground.

I winced. "Sorry. I wasn't thinking."

"How…" Bulma gaped. "I don't know which is worse, your casual energy-to-matter conversion or the fact that you wear clothes that heavy."

"It's easy once you know the trick. And I need to train however I can. Saiyans evolved for a gravity much higher than Earth's. Until someone invents artificial gravity, I'm stuck with weighted clothing as a substitute."

Bulma grinned. "Maybe it'll be in that copy of everything to know that we wish for."

"So we're going with that?" I asked, dropping the towel as I slipped my briefs on underneath it.

Bulma gulped, but kept talking as I got dressed. "Y-yeah. It's much more useful than my wish for a boyfriend. Besides, in all that knowledge might be stuff about robotics and artificial intelligence. Then I can just build the perfect boyfriend!"

I tilted my head. "Well, if that's what you want. I still say you're giving up on men a little too early. I mean, if you were my girlfriend, I'd try to be perfect for you. I can't be the only one in the world."

She blushed. "Thank you for that, Goku. I'll try and remember that."

I laid down on the floor, curling up like a cat. "Well, goodnight."

"Don't you at least want to be on the couch?"

"I'd probably break it. Besides, I've slept on the ground with rocks for pillows before. This is fine." I smiled at her. "Sweet dreams, Bulma."

"Sweet dreams, Goku." With that, she retreated to the bedroom, turning off the light as she went. I made myself comfortable on the carpet and began to meditate, slipping into sleep within minutes.


The next day dawned bright and clear. I went outside for my morning workout and to hunt breakfast while Bulma slept. That done, I went to check on the amphibian that had been our unintended neighbor.

"Hello in there!" I called into the head hole of the shell.

"Hello. My name is Turtle. Who are you?"

"I'm Son Goku. How'd you get here? It's a long way from the ocean."

"It's a long story. Do you have any saltwater, by any chance?"

I brought him inside, meeting a bleary-eyed Bulma at the coffee machine. I got Turtle a bucket of artificial seawater, which he guzzled thirstily. He explained that he'd gotten into a race with a hare and gotten lost. He'd been trying to make his way home ever since, but he was very slow on land.

Bulma pulled out a map. "You're out of luck. The ocean is about a 100 miles away."

"That'll take me 10 years!" Turtle wailed, holding his head with his flippers.

"We can take you," I offered.

"What? Goku, we're on a mission here! We can't take a detour for every Harry Hardluck we run into. No offense," she tacked on.

"None taken." This was one chill turtle.

"If I fly us instead of taking your slow vehicles, we can be there in twenty minutes tops," I offered.

Bulma narrowed her eyes. "You're telling me that not only can you fly, but you can fly at around half the speed of sound while carrying that huge turtle and me?"

"Easy."

Bulma eyed us before shaking her head. "Hell, I'll do it just to see what you do. Let's get on it."

Bulma got dressed, which took a couple hours. I bonded with Turtle while we waited. When she finally emerged, she capsuled the house and then looked expectantly at me. I hiked Turtle onto my back and then held him in place with my tail. Standing straight, I offered my arms for her to get into. Looking flushed, she settled into a bridal carry.

"Ready?"

"Ready."

"Just do it before I change my mind."

I lifted us gently. If you weren't looking at the ground vanishing below us, you wouldn't be able to tell we were moving. Once we were at a suitable height, I turned us south and began to accelerate. I did it slowly so they barely felt it. Before you knew it, the ground was blurring below us.

"How are you two doing?" I asked halfway through the journey.

"This is a lot higher than I'm used to." Turtle sounded quite relaxed.

"Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god. We're flying. I'm flying." Bulma sounded very breathless. "Why isn't there any air resistance?" she demanded.

"I'm holding a bubble of air around us so we don't feel it," I supplied, trying to comfort her. I barely noticed her squeezing me hard as she could, her hold was so gentle, at least to me.

"This is amazing. I mean, it's terrifying, but it's amazing," she said. She closed her eyes and tucked her head into my neck. "Just tell me when it's over."

"We're nearly there," I supplied. I landed as fast as I could while making the descent gentle. Turtle all but sprinted into the water, crying out with joy. I gently set Bulma down on her own feet. She took a few shaky steps, like a newborn colt.

"Bulma? Are you okay?"

"That… that… THAT WAS TOTALLY WICKED!" she screamed. "Goku, how did you do that?"

"Flying is pretty easy, if you have enough ki. You just push against gravity," I explained simply.

She laughed, sounding a little out of it. "A flying alien! I'm friends with a flying alien!" She eyed me with a wild gleam in her eye. "I have got to get you into my lab. There's so many things I want to know about Saiyan physiology and ki!"

Why was she so excited about this? She hadn't given a shit in canon. Maybe because she'd been introduced to it differently, with fun stuff instead of just raw destruction. "Sure. But again, no dissection."

"Will you agree to an MRI and a CAT scan?"

"Sure." There was really no reason for me to train with Master Roshi. Grandpa Gohan had already taught me the Kamehameha Wave and I was the strongest person on the planet, based on my ki sense. Besides, Bulma was my best shot at a gravity chamber.

"Thank you so much!" Turtle spoke up from where he'd been playing in the ocean. "If you'll wait right here, I'll go get my master. He'll surely reward you for helping me."

I turned to Bulma. "Well, Bulma, how about it? Feel like a day at the beach?"

"Sure! Why not? With you flying us, we can get the other Dragon Balls in a snap!"

Bulma and I settled in on the beach while Turtle went off to find his master. She, naturally, had packed swim gear. The sight of her in a two-piece lounging on a chaise in the sun had me very glad that the water was cold. I played around in the water, doing laps and flips and dives, before relaxing on the beach. I built a city out of sand and then rampaged through it like Godzilla or Kong, to Bulma's giggles. After that, I just laid back in the sand next to her. Rest was just as much a part of training as working out. It was good for me to just take a day off every now and then.

"Goku… can I play with your tail?" Bulma asked after a few minutes.

I sat up and turned my back to her. "Sure. Just be careful. It's really sensitive. Squeezing it used to make me pass out before I trained that weakness away."

"Who would squeeze it?"

"Remember what I told you about the Oozaru? Grandpa did it when I started to lose control training it."

"That's another thing about you to study. Turning into a hundred-foot simian just because you get exposed to a particular kind of radiation makes no sense. What kind of evolutionary forces would produce something like that?" she wondered aloud as she stroked my tail, curling her finger around the tip. I about melted into a pile of goo. It was so much better than getting your back scratched. Tailless people just wouldn't understand.

"What's your plan, after we get our wish?" Bulma asked.

"Well, I'll go back with you to wherever you live so you can study me. I'll train like usual until the World Martial Arts Tournament. Grandpa Gohan told me it's a gathering of the strongest fighters in the world. It might be fun, and the prize money should come in handy."

"What about after that? What do you want to do with your life?" Bulma's hands shifted from my tail to my shoulders, but I didn't care. She could touch me however she wanted, I wouldn't care, so blissed out was I.

"I want to get as strong as physically possible, but that'll take years. I want a place I can call home and enough food to fill my belly. I want to find a nice girl and settle down and try to repopulate the Saiyans. I'm an endangered species, after all."

Bulma frowned behind my back. "Have you thought about donating sperm or cloning? That's a lot of pressure to put on one woman."

"No one's raising my kids except me and their mother," I said decisively. "Call me selfish, but I'm not going to have a hundred kids running around I don't know about. Besides, what mother or couple would be able to handle a half-Saiyan? And cloning is just weird. So, yeah, just the one girl and a bunch of babies. Unless she's okay with me having multiple wives, but what are the odds of that?"

Bulma pursed her lips. "Pretty low, unless she's bisexual or not that jealous. Probably both just to be safe."

"Right. So, a nice family-minded girl," I said, leaning back into her hands.

"Or possibly two or more open-minded girls," Bulma added, her tone teasing.

"Yeah, every guy's dream. But not very likely."

Bulma pursed her lips. "You'd never see it the other way around. No one would be okay with one woman with multiple husbands."

"Yeah, that's not fair. Oh, that got me thinking!" I stood up, Bulma's hands' absence felt as I left their embrace. I shook my head and focused, forcing down my erection. Hopefully she hadn't seen that. Anyway, I used the Matter Creation technique to make a volleyball net and ball, and then used Multiform. "This should be fun," the four of me said in unison.

Bulma was drooling again.

About an hour later, while we were having lunch, there was a beeping from Bulma's bag. She went to check, and her eyes shot wide open. "Goku! Another Dragon Ball is moving… towards us!"

I perked up. "Huh. Maybe that's the gift Turtle's master wants to give us."

"This is just the best day! Whoo-hoo!" Bulma jumped up and down in joy. My eyes tracked her jiggling bits for a few seconds before I rushed into the ocean and began swimming off my desires, cramps be damned. Man, the original Goku must have just been asexual instead of brain damaged. My body had no problem reacting to my naughty thoughts.

Now, if only my growth spurt would come earlier than 17-20 like it did for him, that would be nice.

A couple hours later, Turtle appeared on the horizon. There appeared to be someone on his back. "Hey, you guys! This is my master. He's here to give you a gift!"

Master Roshi the Turtle Hermit walked off his underling's back and onto the beach. He looked exactly as I 'remembered' him. Bald head, white beard, sunglasses, tropical outfit, wooden staff, turtle shell on his back. "Hello. I am Master Roshi. I'm very thankful that you helped my companion return home."

"It was nothing, really," I said.

"If you want to thank us, you can give us your Dragon Ball," Bulma said, pointing to the orb hanging by a string around his neck.

"Huh? This old bauble? If you want it, you can have it. Now I won't have to give up the magic carpet."

"Yes!" Bulma cried as he handed it over. She rushed over to her bag, bending over to put the Dragon Ball inside. Roshi got a nosebleed appreciating the view, which I took issue at. Sure, I'd been ogling her too, but she was young enough to be his granddaughter. Great-great-granddaughter actually, given the fact he was over three hundred years old.

I flexed my aura, powering up to the maximum. The wind picked up even as the air seemed to grow heavy, and ripples went out into the water as a white glow surrounded me.

"I wonder how my grandpa would feel knowing that his 'wise' and 'venerable' old master was perving on a 16-year-old," I said threateningly.

"No harm in looking," he countered, even as he sweat bullets. Running into someone even stronger than King Piccolo must be freaking him out on the inside.

I toned down the energy, returning to normal. "Well, look somewhere else," I said, before turning to Bulma. She was staring at me with the oddest look in her eyes.

It wasn't until much later that it occured to me that a powerful, shirtless man defending her honor might have an effect on her.

Bulma and I got dressed and flew off, leaving a gaping Master Roshi and embarrassed Turtle. We wound up collecting all the other Dragon Balls that very day with me flying us from place to place. The fifth we got by beating up Oolong and returning the 'kidnapped' daughters to their village. The sixth was retrieved from the Ox-King, who was just about to send out his daughter Chi-Chi to collect the Bansho Fan from Master Roshi. I offered instead to fly around their castle so fast I created a vacuum, choking the flames. The two heartily congratulated me and freely offered the Dragon Ball from their treasury. Bulma got very rude with Chi-Chi for some reason. The seventh was retrieved from Pilaf's palace. Wanting to avert future hijinks, I looked the little blue man dead in the eye with my most threatening aura and told him that if he ever went looking for the Dragon Balls again, I'd kill him.

By the time the sun set, Bulma and I were looking down at the seven Dragon Balls.

"They're beautiful," Bulma said softly, looking down on them.

"They are," I said, looking at her more than the gems. I looked down at them before she noticed, or at least I thought I did. "So, how do we summon the dragon?"

Bulma cleared her throat. She called out in a clear voice, enunciating carefully "Arise Shenron, and grant me a wish!"

The Dragon Balls glowed until they were impossible to look at. The sky darkened as thunder and lightning appeared from nowhere. Out of the light, a winding green dragon emerged, disappearing and reappearing into the clouds, before coming down to face the two of us, his winding form behind him.

"You who have summoned me, I will grant you one wish," it said in a voice of fire and ash.

Bulma hesitated, obviously scared by the dragon in her face, so I took over. "We wish for a portable, self-powered computer loaded with all the information in the Universe and an easy-to-use search interface." I wanted to cover all the bases. No point of getting all the knowledge if we couldn't use it.

The dragon, Shenron, tilted its head. In a flash of light, a laptop appeared on the ground before us. "Your wish has been granted." With that, it dissolved into light as the seven Dragon Balls floated into the air. In a blast, they were scattered, sent to the corners of the world. I flew as fast as I could and managed to catch each of them before they made it five miles.

"There! Now we don't have to go looking if we want to make another wish in a year," I said, touching down with her duffel bag stuffed in my arms.

Bulma was gaping at me. "Goku… thank you. Just… thank you."

"It was nothing."

She grinned and grabbed the laptop. "I'm going to be studying this thing as much as the stuff inside it! What powers it? How does it have so much memory in such a small space? What coding does it use?"

"How about just asking it? It has all the answers in it, shouldn't it?" I pointed out.

"Oh, right." Bulma hit the power button. A simple search bar appeared on the screen. "Let's try… Son Goku," she said playfully, typing in my name. She hit the 'enter' key. The next page showed a 3D model of me along with an encyclopedic listing of information about me.

"Wow, it really has everything!" she gaped.

I skimmed the page, my cheeks dusting pink. "Including the size of my penis. And the fact I used to wet the bed. That's fun."

Bulma was blushing too. "Well, we did wish for every fact there was. It's part of you."

"Well, let's try looking you up!"

"No way!"

We fought over the Archive for a bit, as we decided to name it later. Then Bulma brought out the capsule house and we went to sleep. Well, I went to sleep. As I curled up on the carpet, I could hear Bulma typing and clicking, delving deeper and deeper into the store of knowledge.


I woke up blearily, aware of someone poking me.

"Goku? Goku! Goku, wake up!"

"Wha' is it?" I asked, yawning and sitting up. Bulma was crouched by me, eyes oddly bright.

"The Archive isn't just an encyclopedia, it's an answer machine! If you type in a question, it'll just give the answer or redirect you to the relevant page!"

"That's nice," I said, rubbing my eyes. "Did you really have to wake me up to tell me that?"

"Yes, I did! Because guess what came up when I typed in 'Who is Bulma's perfect boyfriend?'"

I froze. My mind reeled. No way. No way, no way, no way. "Um… Prince Vegeta?" I asked as much as said.

She rolled her eyes. "No, you loveable goon. It's you!"

"Really?" I asked, my voice going oddly high as it always did when I was nervous.

"Well, technically it said Soul 4829A1826M0683Q0175G, but when I searched for that it came up as you." Bulma grinned. "You know what this means, right?"

"That we can be very happy together," I said, my mouth splitting into a grin. Once I processed the shock, or rather shoved it into a dark corner of my mind to deal with later, I was elated. What do you know, I had found my soulmate!

"Yes, it does." Bulma got a downright hungry look. "It also means I don't have to worry about doing this."

Before I knew what was going on, she was kissing me.

I was overwhelmed by the taste of strawberries, the warmth of her body, the scent of her in my nose. My body moved on instinct, reaching up to cup her face. The kiss lasted a full minute. Her tongue was just starting to tease my lips when I pulled back.

"Bulma… are you sure about this? I mean, we barely know each other."

She rolled her eyes. "Doesn't matter. I want it, you want it, why not? Who better to lose it to than your perfect match?"

"Oh believe me, I want it," I said. "I just don't want you to regret this. We can take this slow, work up to it. Dates and talking and rounding the bases. We don't have to do it right here and now if you don't want to."

She grinned. "That little speech right there, that's exactly why I'm okay doing it right here and now. You're a good guy, Goku. I know we're both young, but you're my friend. Besides, I want to do this now. I want this perfect day to have a perfect ending. I want to be stupid and make love with a boy I trust even though I don't really know him that well. I want you."

Her words electrified me. "Bulma…" I sighed, leaning in for another kiss. How could I say no to that?

We made out for a while, getting intimately familiar with each other's tongues. Our hands roamed from time to time, feeling out each other's bodies. She made to pull at my clothes, but they refused to budge.

I chuckled. "Let me do that for you." So fast I was a blur, I took off my shirt and pants, folded them, and laid them down so they wouldn't break the floor. I stood before in nothing but my black briefs, my tail poking out a hole and the front tented with my arousal.

Her eyes were locked on my body. "God, you're gorgeous. You look better than a model."

"Why, thank you. I worked really hard to look like this," I grinned saucily. "Why don't we take this to the bed and I can see you in your underwear, hm?"

She gave a smile, confident and sexy, no fear. She had absolute faith that I was perfect for her. Without a word, she turned and walked towards the bedroom. As she did, she pulled off her shirt and shimmied out of her skirt. I trailed behind her, my tongue dragging along the floor. Her ass was sublime, a perfect peach teasing me from behind tight pink panties.

We hopped onto her king-sized bed. Our difference in height would have made things awkward if we weren't so carried away with teenage lust. I dipped her back leaned over, plundering her mouth with my own. With slow movements, meant not to startle, I cupped her cheek before trailing it down her neck before cupping one of her mouth-watering breasts in my hand. It was a perfect fit, even though we both still had some growing to do. She moaned as I rotated my wrist, gently massaging her sweet teat with calloused fingers through the thin cotton of her bra.

"Is this expensive?" I asked after a few minutes.

"Why?" she questioned, looking up with me with lidded eyes.

"Well, I wanted to make sure you wouldn't mind if I did… this." With as much effort as she'd use to tear paper, I ripped the dastardly device keeping her chest contained in two.

"Oh! You can do that whenever you like! It's sexy," she moaned, as my palms finally made contact with soft, delicate skin.

I dipped my head. "Good to know," I muttered before taking her nipple into my mouth.

I suckled and licked and groped, accompanied by the melody of Bulma's moans and cries. I played her body like a flute, taking pleasure from giving pleasure, my cock growing heavy and aching as I tasted and molded her body to my desires. I dipped my tail down below, rubbing her pearly gates through her cute little panties.

"Bulma, you're so wet. Are you wet just for me? Is all that juice for your Saiyan lover?" I asked roughly, slipping into dirty talk on some primal impulse.

"YES! Yes, it is!" she moaned, almost screaming.

I leaned up to give her a quick kiss, before moving down her body until my head was at the junction of her thighs. I inhaled deeply of the bouquet of her arousal, before ripping her panties off with the same casual ferocity I'd used on her brassiere. She yelped, before shrieking as I leaned in to feast on her honey.

My tongue was numb and my jaw was aching before I had my fill of her. I'd driven her to three orgasms, and I was filled with male pride as she trembled and screamed beneath my ministrations.

"Goku! Please! I want… I want you," she huffed, coming down off her most recent high.

"Your wish is my command, Bulma," I said, slipping out of my soaked underwear. Between her dripping liquids and my leaking precum, I was as lubricated as I needed to be. I teased her nether lips with the head of my throbbing manhood. "You want this?"

"Yes!"

"Where do you want it, Bulma?"

"Inside!"

"Inside what?" I asked, teasing her even as I gave some soft thrusts, not enough to penetrate but enough to make her feel me.

"Inside my pussy! I want your fat, hard dick inside my slutty cunt! You happy?" she demanded, locking eyes with me over an embarrassed blush.

I leaned down to kiss her stomach as I flexed my hips and finally, FINALLY entered her. "Ecstatic," I moaned.

Soft as silk, warm as pie, tight as a vice. Bulma's snatch molded around my invading prick like it was made just for me. There was a small bit of resistance, but I pushed through implacably until I was buried to the root.

We waited there, just breathing, as she made me a man and I made her a woman.

"Can I move?" I asked, desperate for sensation even as I was stimulated to the brink just by being inside.

"Yeah," came her reply. She cupped the back of my head, even as her legs came up to wrap around my waist. "Move, Goku."

I began to thrust in and out, in and out, in the ageless rhythm so many first lovers had discovered before. I pushed deep and hard, my balls coming up to slap her ass, the tip of my erection poking at the gates of her womb. Then I withdrew, harsh and fast, the slip and slide of her heavenly warmth against my cock driving me crazy with desire and euphoria. She sang for me, cooing and yipping, and vocalizing as my efforts drove her to new heights and peaks of ecstasy. I never wanted it to end, but all good things must.

"Bulma… I'm close. Where do you want it?"

"Inside! I want to feel you inside me!"

"Is it… safe?" I managed to ask, even as I bucked harder at her words.

"Yes, yes, now just do it! Fill me up! Make me yours!" she demanded as only an heiress could.

"Then here… it… is!" I grunted, pressing my pelvis flush to her's as I erupted, my seed shooting out deep within her body. "BULMA!"

"GOKU!"

We panted in the afterglow, my sated member sliding out of her slit as I crawled up her body to peck her lips and lie my head on her shoulder. We cuddled, her arms coming up to hold me even as I wrapped her in my own.

"That… was…" she huffed.

"Perfect?" I offered.

"Yes. It was perfect," she said, sleepy and content.

I waited a few seconds before asking the question burning in my mind. "Want to do it again?"

"What?" she cried, looking down at me. I rubbed my awakening rod against the creamy smoothness of her side.

"I have a lot of stamina," I said simply.

Neither of us got much sleep that night. But it was worth it.