Make the Yuletide Gayest

A/N: A new round of FT holiday drabbles. ^-^ For my disaster gays. Happy holidays, lovelies, whatever you do or don't celebrate.

There's a traumatically mute character who signs. I've written his dialogue as the English translation in italics.

Chapter 1: We Slept Together On Accident

Gajeel sniffed the air.

"Things feel at all different to you?" he asked Levy.

"By that do you mean, 'are your human senses picking up the same things mine are'?" Levy looked over her book long enough to roll her eyes. "If someone smells weird, go ask them about it."

Gajeel sunk down, arms crossed. "No. 'S rude."

"So's talking about it where they might hear," Levy said, turning a page. "Especially of the person you're talking about is another Dragon Slayer."

"They aren't paying any attention to me."

"That's what you think."

He grumbled and opened his mouth to argue.

"Go bother someone else," she broke in, pesky yet chuckling. "I'm trying to read this book by this evening."

"Ah…when Natsu's team will get back." He grinned.

"Sure. Whatever," she said, refusing to look at him.

Laxus's ears itched. Not paying any attention. Hah. Of course he was. And he knew exactly which smells Redfox had picked up on.

And his face was flushed and he really didn't want to deal with this right now.

Laxus could hear Redfox still musing about his and Freed's scents, and was resolutely keeping his back turned, facing his teammates who were having an argument. Rather, Freed and Ever were having an argument, while Laxus avoided joining in and Bickslow's short attention span was swallowed up with trying to juggle two apples that were definitely the worse for wear. Not that unusual, really.

"That's not how magic works!" Ever said, frustrated.

"On an ether-quantum level, magic behaves as both a particle and a wave," Freed argued. "It's both energy and substance, simultaneously. That theory is the best one we have right now."

"It's just a theory. And even if it were true, it has nothing to do with practical magic."

"It has everything to do with practical magic—"

"Not when you're trying to get an eleven-year-old to stop changing size all the time!" Ever said, running her hands into her hair. It was considerably frizzed at this point. "She needed pointers on calming down, regulating emotions, learning to feel ethernanos—not a formal lecture on how to stop transmuting between solid and liquid or whatever the hell you were telling her."

"When I was eleven, I already knew Planck's theory by heart, had read Bohr's book on the subject, and learned the equations proving it," Freed said hotly.

"You're not normal, Freed!"

Laxus made a rumble of agreement. Freed turned on him.

"You read the same book, Laxus."

"Yeah, when I was fifteen and had you to explain it to me. Also, I don't remember half of it."

Freed rolled his eyes in exasperation. "Fine. You win, Ever. Teach children to be stupid. Next thing you know, they won't even know the difference between integrals and derivatives."

"Most people don't know the difference between—" She began.

"Stop, stop, you're just depressing me," Freed complained, holding up his hands.

"He's too intellectual to face reality, Ever," Laxus said. "Be nice on his big brain."

Freed glared at him. Laxus grinned.

He smelled Redfox finally exit the guildhall and rolled his shoulders.

"You're doing the thing again," Freed observed, seeming happy to change topics.

"Which things?"

"Is someone talking about their sex life, or is it hygiene-related this time?"

"No. Just…making rude comments," Laxus said, shifting. He glanced over at Bickslow. "You know, at this point those apples aren't fit to make a pie."

"I hate apple pie," Bickslow said errantly, missing one of the apples which hit the floor with a splorch.

"You what?" Laxus said.

"Don't," Ever and Freed said together.

"He's crazy," Ever said. "Don't even try with him. As I see it, this means there's more pie for the rest of us."

"But pie."

"I know." Ever shook her head. Bicks stuck his tongue out at them.

Freed brushed his coat off, flipped his hair over his shoulder, and glanced around the guildhall.

"Think we have time for another mission before the party Saturday?"

"You know Mira will kill you if you make us miss it," Bickslow said.

Freed pouted—a hilarious face on him. "I'm bored."

"Of course you are," Laxus grinned.

He jostled Freed with his shoulder and Freed smiled back. It felt good to have this, to act normal and joke around. Last night, Freed had fallen asleep on his shoulder after they'd stayed up way to late playing cards, and Laxus had slept out on the sofa with him because he was afraid to move and wake him. Now they smelled like each other and Laxus was afraid it'd be awkward. Thank goddess it wasn't.

Waking up that morning, Freed had blearily asked him if he wanted coffee or tea, and disengaged from under Laxus's arm to go bang around the kitchen. Laxus's side had been cold, and he rose soon after to help with breakfast.

"What about a job in town?" Bickslow suggested.

"There's an idea." Evergreen looked toward the request board. "There might be something…"

"There's probably one for teaching young mages," Bickslow said, side of his mouth climbing into a smile.

"NO," Evergreen and Laxus said at the same time.

"We are not having that argument again," Laxus said.

Freed looked hurt, so Laxus caught his eye, shrugging apologetically.

"You're a good teacher, Freed. And you're great with little kids. You and Ever just don't make good co-teachers."

"Not like you or Bicks do either," Ever retorted, rounding on Laxus like he'd insulted her. "You two aren't smart enough to keep up."

"Hey!" Bickslow shouted. "I resent that."

"Whatcha going to do about it?"

"Holy gods," Freed sighed, rubbing his face. "We definitely need to take a job. Laxus, pick something. Please."

Gajeel followed the usual tangle of scents out the guild doors and inhaled the fresh winter air. He could never quite breathe deeply inside the guild, where human smells smothered everything.

Sniffing, he whirled around, ear catching the slushing sound of footsteps. Not that people wouldn't be out and about, but this was…

He headed toward the woods, eyes keen to catch sight of anything moving between the trees. He knew this smell. Better than Levy's and Lily's. It called to him every time he got a whiff, and even now, his stomach growled.

That scaly undertone of a Dragon Slayer's scent drew him on.

Natsu punched Gray's arm in a friendly way. Gray punched him back.

"Nice work," Natsu said, the pair falling into step at the front of their entourage. "You're getting better at those fake attacks."

Gray stuck his tongue out at him.

"Yeah, yeah," Natsu laughed.

"Natsu," Lucy called up, "do—"

He missed the rest because Gray's hands began to move.

Natsu burst out laughing.

"You're hilarious, and the answer is no."

Gray narrowed his eyes and signed, Why not? You're the noisy one. You'd make a better distraction than I do.

"Aw, don't downplay how well you do at your role," Natsu said. He signed, You can be flashy. Your magic explodes too. Anything I can do, you can do, too.

You just don't want to switch.

Natsu grinned. Can you blame me? I get to roast them because they're always ogling you.

What if I don't want to be ogled? Gray signed with a glare, movements large and insistent.

Natsu's face fell.

"Oh. We can switch next time if you want. I'll do the faking. You're the sincere one of us, anyway."

He smiled, a question in his eyes, and despite the tease, Gray smiled back.

"Natsu!"

"Huh?" He turned around and found Lucy with her hands on her hips. "Honestly, you don't pay any attention to what you don't want to. I swear your draconic senses are for nothing."

"What do you want?" he asked, pouting.

She rolled her eyes.

"Oh my god. Allow me to repeat my question a third time…"

Lucy's feet were getting tired when the team crested a hill and looked down into a valley with a small town amid farms.

"Think it's big enough to have a ryokan?" Erza asked, leading them down. "Guess we'll find out."

Gray signed something quick at her which Lucy missed.

"Really?" Erza asked. "You're sure?"

Gray gave her a flat look: they all knew his locative memory was superb.

"I'd be down," Natsu said, bounding down the path and smiling back over his shoulder. "Race you there!"

"You don't even know where the hot springs are, Natsu!" Erza shouted as he and Gray took off running. She shook her head.

"It's a win for Gray then," Lucy laughed. "Heat and relaxation do sound nice. I wish we'd made it back to Magnolia though…"

Erza shrugged. "It couldn't be helped. If both Natsu and Gray are sick, a train ride would be horrid."

"What does this sign mean?" Lucy asked, moving her hand in imitation.

"Oh, that's nausea. He just ate something that disagreed with him. At least he was good to walk."

"Maybe tomorrow he'll be well enough to train back the rest of the way. Then we'd at least get back in the morning."

Erza tilted her head.

"Do you have something to get back to?" she asked.

"No…" Lucy twisted her fingers, before she realized what she was doing and stopped. "Just that Levy was going to pass me the next book for book club."

"Wow, you're that excited about a book?" Erza chuckled.

"Well, no, see: it's her choice this week, so I'm second and I have to read it fast so Freed gets a chance to read it too. We have it all, you know. Coordinated. So I have to see Levy. To get the book."

Erza laughed and Lucy had the distinct feeling she was babbling, but Erza was a good enough friend not to mention it.

Gray carefully lowered himself into the water one centimeter at a time. He liked hot springs, but he also had to get used to the heat slowly. He'd fainted once. That had been embarrassing. Luckily Natsu had accepted the 'ice magic' excuse back then.

Finally in, he leaned his head back and let out a long sigh.

Slapping footsteps preceded a splash and Natsu's signature happy groan.

"I swear it literally recharges ethernanos to sit in here."

Opening his eyes, Gray looked over at him. Natsu's face was flushed from the heat, his damp hair swept sideways. When he smiled at Gray, Gray returned it, and it felt good.

"So how do you form replicas of yourself that are so accurate?" Natsu asked. Gray tilted his head in question. "I don't know what I look like. I mean, I do, but not that well. When you make your imitations, they're really detailed. I noticed today they even have eyelashes."

The fact that Natsu noticed that was a little odd—and oddly invasive—but then, he had spectacular eyes.

Gray raised his hands to reply, splashed water everywhere, and looked over at Natsu with a shrug, flicking water at him.

"Fine," Natsu laughed, "answer me later when you can sign more easily."

Gray lay back and relaxed, letting his arms float in the water. Sometimes his fingers got tired of talking. They'd grow heavy, like all that communication made him vulnerable. Even though Natsu and Erza were often the only two who could understand, it still felt…naked.

A completely different kind of naked than what he currently (and frequently) was.

"I'm sorry about the ogling," Natsu said in a quieter voice.

Gray shook his head.

"No, it does matter. Gray, you don't… You don't deserve that. And I'm sorry."

Gray nodded, and Natsu nodded back.

They both relaxed for a little while, the silence easing.

Natsu floated over, blowing bubbles in the water as he went, eyes just above the water. Gray gave him a look, but it was friendly curiosity; there was no animosity when it was just them alone. Things like who won their race or who'd started the last brawl stopped mattering so much; it was all amiable, comfortable, and home.

Reaching out, Gray touched Natsu's hand. Natsu startled a little, but seeing Gray's smile, he returned it.

"Why do you strip?" Natsu asked.

Gray raised an eyebrow.

"Yeah, I know, your magic, but…why? Does it help you focus?"

Floundering his hands in the water, Gray splashed him.

"You're really going to make me do twenty questions like when we were little?" Natsu laughed. "Because I will. And it will drive you insane."

Gray glared, but it held no true anger behind it and Natsu knew that, laughing with a mischievous smile.

"So do you strip in order to feel cold?"

Gray shook his head.

"To become one with your ice?" Natsu teased dramatically.

Gray shook again.

"It is for focus, isn't it? Something about throwing off distractions?"

Gray nodded then shrugged his shoulders. That was part of it.

"Uh-huh. And in the meantime, you want to distract your enemies by giving them a nude show when they least expect it?"

That got Gray to raise his hands out of the water.

No, I don't do it to fucking get them to look at me. I hate people staring at me like that. I'm so tired of people staring and just—judging. My body isn't perfect. I don't always—but then I have to check, and care, and make sure I look… And then the scars, and they ask, and that's off limits: I'm sorry, but I don't—don't share that. And…and making jokes about my dick—

Making what? Natsu interrupted with a jerk.

You know, like "I know that like I know there are three freckles on Gray's dick," or "How long are you today? Oh, only nine centimeters, I guess you don't have a crush on anyone here…"

Who fucking said that to you?

Gray sighed. Cana did once.

Fuck her.

Natsu…

No really, fuck her. That's not—how the fuck could anyone think that's appropriate?

It doesn't bug me, Gray interrupted, but Natsu cut him off with a slice through the air.

You just said it does bug you. And you have every right… Fuck, people are shits sometimes.

Blushing, Gray retreated from him, sinking down until his shoulders were under the water and he was breathing steam. He didn't know what to do when Natsu was on his side. It felt uncomfortable. Not wrong, just…like it was happening to other people.

"So," Natsu said. He'd retreated to a corner, and Gray couldn't tell through the steam if his voice was shaking or that was just Gray's hearing. "You strip down in order to focus…but isn't it also because you just like it?"

Gray nodded.

"You don't like the feel of cloth," Natsu went on, as Gray continued to nod, a tiny bit of his smile returning. "I thought I remembered that, yeah. You don't like…your skin feels weird. Claustrophobic or whatever."

Yes.

"Me too: inside buildings."

That's why you destroy everything, Gray teased.

They both smiled again, and Gray breathed.

At least, he did until Natsu said, "I like you when you strip."

In the split second after, they both stared at each other, stunned, and Natsu started coughing hard.

"I mean, you know, you're being you. When you're not self-conscious, you're…you know. More…interesting. I mean," Natsu rubbed his face, "more fun? Not like you're boring. But it makes you attractive—er— Gods. Okay. What I'm trying to say is that it's cool when you don't care what people think."

Thank…you.

Except Gray always cared what people thought. That's why he tried to avoid them.

"Does it ever get too hot for you in here?" Natsu suddenly asked. "You're all weird with temperature."

It can. Takes a while.

"Huh. Because I'm burning up. And before you make a joke, ha ha, yes, I know." Natsu lifted himself out of the water, turning his back to Gray to step out. "I'm gonna head to our room."

Okay, Gray signed, but Natsu wasn't looking.

He flashed Gray a brief smile, and then he was gone.

Gray sank lower into the water.

Erza wandered out of the ryokan and across the street to a small teahouse. She intended to get something to drink and head back, but when she saw cake on the menu, she decided to get a late night snack.

"…and a melon Ramune," she finished, sitting at the counter. The woman headed off.

Feeling airy and light, Erza glanced around—and stared at the woman who had appeared in the doorway.

When their eyes met, the woman grabbed the jamb in one hand and her sword hilt in the other, as if she'd stumbled.

"Erza?"

"Kagura?" Erza gaped. "Wow. Hi. Come sit with me."

Kagura did, dark hair swinging in front of her face, and Erza experienced the lesbian inability to speak in the presence of a beautiful woman.

"So what are you doing here?"

"Snack," Kagura said, looking sideways at her shyly. Erza felt about the same level of suave, and was grateful the nerves were mutual.

"They have cake," she offered.

Kagura's eyes lit up. "Oo!"

When the owner emerged with Erza's order, Erza requested cake for Kagura before Kagura could, sliding over the Jewels and winking at Kagura…and then immediately blushing.

"So," Erza said quickly, "what brought you to this corner of the world?"

They ate amid comfortable conversation, occasionally bumping elbows. There was something comforting about it all; homely. Erza could've been anywhere in the world like this, the two of them drinking soda and eating sugar, and it would be perfect no matter what was going on around them.

When their plates were long gone and several ramune bottles sat empty before each of them, Erza finally looked at the clock on the wall and jolted.

"It's almost one?!"

"What?" Kagura exclaimed. "This place is open that late?"

They stared at each other, then burst into giggles.

"I don't regret a thing," Erza admitted honestly.

"Me neither," Kagura said. "There was this one time Millianna and I stayed up until…"

When Gray lay down on his futon, his eyes were open to the dark. Even wide-eyed he could see almost nothing, but he knew where everything was: a wall a meter in front of him, another up by his head, Natsu a little ways behind him, and beyond him, the door.

At this time of year, Gray needed to know where everything was, all the escape routes. Most people didn't know that about him and this holiday, didn't notice, and he was happy to leave it that way. This was his private winter hell.

"Gray," Natsu whispered, shuffling as he laid out his own futon. "You awake?"

Gray tapped his nails on the tatami.

"Is it okay… Are you okay if…"

Natsu sounded so strange Gray almost turned over to look at him. But he wouldn't be able to see anything in the dark, while Natsu would be able to see him, he'd see Gray's expressions, and Gray would be naked to him…

He huffed, a sound of frustration, and Natsu sighed.

"Touch or no touch tonight?" Natsu asked.

Gray stiffened.

They'd only done this a few times—slept next to each other, bodies warm where they collided in the night. Usually it was when Gray had nightmares (or when Natsu occasionally did) or after gruesome missions when they both needed the affirmation that the world was still safe and good.

Inhaling, Gray nodded at the darkness, reaching back until his fingers brushed Natsu's arm behind him.

There were sounds of shifting, and then Natsu's heat preceded a warm and comforting hand landing on Gray's shoulder. Natsu's thumb caressed back and forth several times before he asked, "Okay?"

Gray tapped the tatami in the affirmative.

Shrinking the gap between them, Natsu approached until his thighs bumped the back of Gray's legs, hand sliding down across his chest in a one-armed hug.

"Okay?" he asked again.

Gray nodded. Natsu's warm translated across the space between them, and Gray liked that.

After a few minutes, Natsu finished the move, stomach coming to press gently against Gray's back, breath light on his neck.

"Still okay?"

Fumbling, Gray found his hand and signed awkwardly into it, All okay.

Natsu was confused for a moment—Gray had to sign it twice—but then he exhaled a smile and finally curled up comfortably around Gray, the pair of them melting together.

"I like being around you," Natsu sighed, dragging his fingers down Gray's cheek for a moment.

Gray's heart leapt up his throat. They'd never done that before.

But Natsu did no more, and after a little while Gray was able to relax against him, Natsu's embrace loose and perfectly enclosed, keeping him safe in a way very few things ever made him feel.

As sleep dragged his eyelids shut, he twined his fingers between Natsu's and got a responding squeeze.

Without Natsu, Gray wouldn't know how to not be alone.

Juvia stared in through the window at the two men on the single futon.

Natsu had Gray in what appeared to be a body-lock, arms and legs twined around him so Gray couldn't escape. And Gray…he looked scared, twitching from nightmares.

It was not right. Juvia knew better than anyone that Gray's mind was delicate. He couldn't be touched like that. He didn't like it. That Natsu would dare…

She'd kissed Gray's cheek once, and he'd burst into tears. It was the only time she'd ever heard him make a vocal noise, hoarse and broken, and the sound had been both deeper and tighter than she'd imagined.

She wondered what his speaking voice would sound like. Beautiful, she knew that. She longed to hear it. One day, perhaps.

But it wouldn't happen if Natsu were trapping him while he slept, pinning him down and holding him captive with touch and smell and physical presence that Gray could not thrive in.

Leaning back against the wall, she stared up at the barest sliver of the waxing moon and wondered. Wondered if he'd ever open up enough to be loved. If he'd ever let her into the small, intimate circle of friends he'd cultivated. She knew membership in that safe group of people was precious and hard-won, knew she had to work for it.

After he'd saved her from herself—from her self-imposed insularity and the company she'd chosen—she'd found that while he sought warmth for others, he was ice-cold toward himself. He had so many walls around his soul that she was fascinated almost instinctually, wanting to know the Gray that lay inside all that self-defense.

And then, of course, she'd grown to care about him: to see glimpses of him in his fear or sadness or brief happy moments. She wanted better for him. He was always alone; he needed to let in someone who cared for him. Juvia didn't want him to be alone anymore.

She knew loneliness better than anyone. If there was anything in the world she could change, it would be making sure nobody was ever alone. Least of all the ones with bloodied hearts.

A/N: This is a multichap! Expect more posts throughout the day and into tomorrow. {Endgame: Gray/Natsu, Sting/Rogue, Freed/Laxus, Cana/Mirajane, Lucy/Levy, Erza/Kagura, Gajeel/Erik-Cobra, Mest/Lahar, and Juvia/Lisanna.}