One day Samus received a call from Bernie Sanders. "Samus, we have another mission for you. This one may be a little different from your last ones..."

"Lay it on me," Samus said.

"We've recently discovered that Ridley's foreskin may hold the cure to cancer. You need to go to his cave and retrieve it."

So Samus went to Ridley's cave on Dagobah. Ridley jumped on her as soon as she entered.

"Samus! I'm gonna kill you!"

"Wait!" Samus said. "I come... in peace." She proceeded to take off her shirt and bra. "Come get me big guy."

Ridley's penis grew to a tremendous size. He plunged it into her vaginal cavity without a moment of hesitation, and their tongues intertwined. It was pretty darn attractive. After a considerable shared orgasm, they fell asleep.

When Ridley woke up, his foreskin was gone! "That bitch Samus fucking circumcised me! I'm gonna kill her!" He saw her ship flying away. He flew after it.

When Samus got back to base, she quickly ran to Bernie's office, Ridley hot on her tail. But when she entered, Bernie was not alone. Mike Pence, Shaggy, Doctor Who, Kanye, and Dark Samus were all standing around a table with Bernie, all colluding!

"Oh shit Samus you weren't supposed to see this," said Bernie.

"What is the foreskin REALLY for?!" Samus said.

"You'll never know!" said Mike Pence, who shot at her with a gun. She dodged but Doctor Who stole Ridley's foreskin while she wasn't looking!

"Now we can sell this to Russia and make millions!" said Shaggy.

Then Samus pulled out a bomb and blew them all up! Then she gave Ridley his foreskin back and they fucked. But little did she know... Shaggy was not dead!

To be continued.