But I Did Do It

Her eyes hurt they were dry, red, and swollen. She had never cried so much in her life; the last forty-eight hours had been a living hell for her. Question, after question, there was no end to this. She fell back into her turquoise sofa and let out a huff, when would this all end? When would she move on?

Someone had murdered her husband.

She was coming home from a hard day at work, she didn't think being a pharmaceutical sales rep would be so stressful, but damn it she was beat. She couldn't wait to unwind with a glass of wine, in her tub filled with scented soap and bubbles. She was sure Leonard would get home a few hours from now, and by then she'd be so unwounded she'd probably have sex with him. She supposed it was her duty anyways.

She didn't even glance back at the wooden door for 4A, she couldn't be bothered. Sheldon had become insufferable ever since he and Amy made it official and finally had sex, she knew this because not even ten minutes after the act, Amy was on the phone with her bragging about how she finally got to home stretch with the lanky scientist. So, dealing with a neurotic Sheldon was the absolute last thing on her mind.

Penny unlocked the door, the room completely black due to lack of sunlight. She threw her keys into the bowl by the door, and shrugged her coat off, followed by her heels. For a September evening in Los Angeles, it was fairly chilly. She nicked her arm on the coat rack as she moved and felt a small trickle of blood seep from her wound, "That's where my cut came from." She moved to walk towards her bedroom, but her bare feet stepped into something sticky. She immediately gagged at the feeling of the thick substance and wiggled her toes. The liquid webbed between the digits and she immediately hobbled towards the light switch, trying in vain to not trail whatever it was along the wooden floors, "That's probably where the bloody footprints came from."

Once she turned the lights on, she was met with a terrible stench. It was like the dark masked the rancid scent, but once the light shone brightly in the room everything was exposed. She saw the large puddle of blood in the middle of her living room, in the middle of it was her husband. He laid there, looking pale and rigid, a large dent in the side of his head. She screamed, who wouldn't?

She dropped to her knees and immediately grabbed her husband, "And that's why there was blood on my clothes."

She shook him viciously, disbelieving that he lay lifeless on her apartment floor. Just when everything was going good in their lives, this happened? Who could do this to him? Who could even stomach the thought of murder? Why him? Why her? Why them?!

His body was extremely cold, and stiffer than wood. Was that rigor mortis? If so, then she knew he had been dead for longer than four hours. She learned all types of things from Sheldon. She let her tears soak his shirt as she cried into his hard chest, who could take her happiness away from her?

It was then the door behind her opened, and an audible gasp was heard. Sheldon had come barging into the apartment, he had heard her scream and was ready to defend her against whomever intruded her home. Baseball in hand. Though, when he noticed his former roommate on the ground helplessly, he dropped the weapon and it rolled into the puddle of thick blood. "That's why the bat was covered in blood."

Sheldon had examined Leonard's head, he had deduced whoever did this had hit him with blunt force to the head at a close enough range to sink in half his scalp. The main source of blood was coming from the gaping hole in his head, but it had stopped a while ago. He could tell. Once Sheldon had fully assessed the situation, he realized his khakis were bloodstained and a whine escaped his mouth, "That's why Sheldon was covered in blood."

He wiped his equally bloody palms on his trousers and stood to his feet, effectively pulling out his cellphone.

That's what she told the police.

So, she was startled when she heard a loud knocking on her door, "LAPD, open up."

Penny shuffled to the door and tried to fix her appearance, her raccoon eyes and messy hair was embarrassing. She pulled the door open and looked up at the three male detectives, eyes wide, "Can I help you?"

The detective at the front spoke first, "Sorry to bother you, Miss. Queen-"

"Mrs. Hofstadter."

The two detectives in the back looked at each other, as if noting something but stayed quiet. The one at the front continued, "Right. Mrs. Hofstadter. The team back at the lab discovered some blood on the scene, and it isn't Mr. Hofstadter's, we believe it to be the suspects. As a protocol, we would like for you to come to the lab with us so we could cross-reference your blood with the sample we have and just make sure you aren't who we are looking for."

Penny looked at them, completely offended, "You think it was me who killed, Leonard?!" She bellowed.

The second detective shook his head, "No, it's just a procedure. In most of these cases, it's way too obvious to be the spouse."

The blonde woman huffed but nodded, it took her ten minutes to ready herself to a certain level of decency. She followed the detectives to the station.

It took nearly an hour, but they were ready for her.

The lab was pristine, and she could just smell the disinfectant. Sheldon would be proud of the cleaning crew. A woman stood by a table, a microscope on a metal desk surface and the same detectives standing behind her. "Mrs. Hofstadter, if you could just take a seat here," she pointed towards a metal chair.

It was cold under her bottom, but Penny managed. She watched the woman carefully, as she pulled out a bunch of tools, "Now this is literally going to take two seconds, and you might feel a slight pinch, but trust me it's completely safe and nothing to worry about."

Penny stretched her right arm out, palm up, and the woman put a silver device over her palm. The device completely swallowing Penny's hand, like promised she felt a small pinch but nothing more. After a short whirring noise, the device retracted and the lady stared into the small glass window on it, she looked confused.

"Is there a problem?" Penny's voice was soft and filled with innocence.

The lady scratched her head as she gestured for the detectives to move forward and take a look for themselves, and once they did, they all looked at Penny confused. The lady looked at Penny and tilted her head, "Mrs. Hofstadter, uhm, your blood is…white?"

Penny stood to her feet and invited herself to look into the small window of the device that extracted blood from her, in a smile vile was her blood. It was whiter than the freshest snow. She smirked to herself and then at the detectives who were staring at her, "Well then, you see detectives," she held up her palm and squeezed it into a fist, the small incision on the fleshy surface started to leak more of her blood, but before it could drip she stopped, "I couldn't possibly be the murderer, the blood you found is red mine is white," she stated simply and then looked at the lady, "It's a small genetic disorder, completely rare."

Turning around she accidentally knocked into the 'eject' button on the device, and the vile holding her blood spilled to the floor. Glass shattering all around it, she gasped, "Oh my goodness, I'm so sorry!" The detectives only shook their heads, still dazed, "You're free to leave, Mrs. Hofstadter."

Penny didn't wait for a second invitation, she left the station quickly.

She sighed deeply as she stepped into the night air and walked towards her car. She recalled the night forty-eight hours prior as she drove.

Penny was pissed.

Tonight, was the night, she was tired of acting oblivious to things going on around her. Leonard had been cheating on her for the last two years of their marriage, and they only been married for three years! She remembered when she found out, it was by accident, she had walked into their apartment and heard him in the act with the woman. She went to Sheldon's apartment and cried.

Sheldon surprisingly comforted her, and thoroughly. She was feeling better by the next morning.

But as the days had gone on, and the days turned to months, and the months turned to years. She decided enough was enough. She had to do something about this, and then she told Sheldon what she wanted to do. She was scared, he was so morally sound she thought he would have her committed right there and then. But instead he kissed her and told her he'd do anything if that meant having her as his officially. So, they went to work.

Sheldon hacked her jobs cameras and gathered footage of her at work from a previous day, when the day of the murder came, he made sure to override the days footage with the one he collected, easy. So now, her alibi stuck, she was at work.

Now, they just wait.

Penny was already in her apartment when Leonard arrived, her one thing was she wanted to confront him about cheating. She wanted him to admit it to her face, and as she stood their toe-to-toe with the man she vowed herself to, she grew angrier with each second. He was smug and denied it until he was blue in the face. Then, he realized it wasn't going to work, so he told her it was her fault, she was never around anymore.

That's when he noticed the wooden baseball bat in her hand, and his eyes largened. He didn't have much time to react, because Penny had knocked him over the head with the object, a loud sound rang out and Sheldon took that as his sign to enter. Leonard was wobbly on his feet, he clearly had a concussion, but the job wasn't done yet. He had blood falling from his scalp, as he moved around. Penny cursed as she stepped into his blood and trailed footprints on the hardwood as she followed him.

She went to swing at him again, but Leonard swiped at her and missed. His nail scratching her arm, her blood leaked onto him. She looked at Sheldon worriedly, she knew she didn't have to worry about hair on the crime scene, it was her apartment after all so that would be easy to cover up. But blood on the murder victim? Sheldon looked just as worried, and she knew that wasn't a good sign. They both decided it was too late to turn back, they had to finish this now.

Sheldon took an elbow to Leonard's neck, which paralyzed the man momentarily, Penny took the opportunity and made her final swing. A loud sickening crack was heard, and Leonard fell to the floor with a thump! the job was done. Sheldon got to his knees and checked his pulse, blood getting onto his khakis as he did so, he didn't even complain. He just looked up at Penny and smiled. The job was done.

They shared a dirty passionate kiss and took a shower together. Relishing in their freedom and joining themselves as one once again. They decided to burn their blood-soaked clothes and change into what Penny would be wearing from work, and Sheldon's proper attire for the night. With one last kiss, Sheldon took the plastic bag that held their bloody clothes and shoved it into his side bag, he carried it everywhere so he wouldn't look suspicious.

He told her he would chemically burn the clothes and the plastic bag at CalTech that night, and the evidence would be nonexistent. Penny agreed and the two got into action.

They waited six hours to call the police, two more hours than four, that's how Penny knew.

A loud clearing of the throat brought Penny out of her thoughts, she looked up and saw a somber looking Sheldon. She copied his facial expression and walked into his apartment, once the doors were closed, he grabbed her shoulders and kissed her.

"And? Did it match?"

She shook her head, "My blood was white."

She told Sheldon about her rare genetic disorder. Her blood turned darker with every evil act she did and whiter with every good deed, in high school her blood had turned black because of it. Though, ever since she had been trying to turn her life around and only do good deeds. She knew murder would ruin this, but Leonard had made her so mad she didn't see another choice. Leaving him just wasn't good enough. He'd recover from that.

So, when her blood dripped on him, she was worried. She saw that it was still red, a light red, but still red. She knew that if her blood matched with the blood they found, she would be caught. But, turns out after she officially murdered him it lightened. Meaning, her murdering Leonard was actually a good deed. She was pleasantly surprised when she saw her white blood staring back at her in the police station. They could never pin the red blood they found on her, and she didn't want them to have her DNA, so she purposely broke the vile.

"I guess whatever higher power did this to me, saw Leonard's cheating ways as evil and thought I was doing a good deed," she smiled as Sheldon placed an arm around her.

He kissed her temple and then stroked the cut on her arm, "And the police are as clueless as ever, they'll never find a suspect. They completely written you off now thinking you're innocent," he smirked. Penny only leaned up and kissed him quickly.

"But I did do it," she smirked as she led him to his bedroom.