How do you sleep when you have those thoughts in your head?

Almost eight years had passed, and she still didn't know how to do it.

Gendry was sleeping peacefully beside her, just like he used to do while they were on the road. They weren't touching, except for the fingers of her left hand slightly brushing his right ones. She kept staring at the ceiling, unable to sleep. Unable to close her eyes.

A huge weight was pressing on her chest—a feeling she didn't want to name- but she couldn't ignore. Not in the silence before a battle. Not in the silence of her heart.

Love.

Something she couldn't afford—because love meant fear. And fear—meant death.

She turned her head slowly to look at Gendry sleeping features.

She didn't account for- this.

She just wanted to feel something— good, with someone who loved and cared for her- someone she trusted. What she couldn't predict were the feelings that emerged—for him. For them.

A part of her wished he would just wake up, get dressed and leave her as nothing happened— and yet-

- the sound of the horn brought her back to reality. She didn't react at all, but Gendry's body shook beside her and his eyes shot open. He sat up in one fluid motion, his eyes going back and forth frantically, searching for an enemy. She wondered how many nights he woke up like this during the three years they spent apart.

Her hand touched his beside her. "It's just the first warning."

She saw in eyes the moment he was back in that forge with her. She tried to take her hand away, but he gripped her fingers tightly in his- his eyes searching hers. She avoided his gaze, slowly rising into a sitting position as well—her hand gripping his cloak that covered her front. "We should get going—"

"Arya—"

She turned away from him, exposing her back to him. She made a move to stand up when his soft voice stopped her.

"Don't shut me out—not after what we just shared."

She shook her head without turning. "I'm not—"

"Arya—" He shushed her. "This wasn't a one-night thing—you know that, right?"

A chill ran through her body. She closed her eyes- no, they couldn't do this. Not now.

"I won't go back to just being—whatever we were before. I can't." When she didn't move or speak again, he gently took her arm, making her turn to face him.

"This means something to me- you mean something-" He lowered his head for a moment, words choking his breath. "I need to know if—"

It was the hint of sadness and fear in his voice that made her defenses crumble. She couldn't see him worried about what happened between them- along with everything else.

She slowly leaned her forehead to his, closing her eyes.

"It means something to me, too."

Tensions suddenly left his body, his shoulders relaxed and he gripped her waist more firmly.

"Arya—"

She kissed him softly before he could finish. "If we survive today—we'll talk about this."

He stared at her for a long moment, reading in her eyes what she couldn't say with her voice, before nodding. He slowly traced his fingers on the jarred lines that marked her abdomen. "I need to know everything— I need to know what happened— who did this-"

She nodded. "I know."

The battle horn sounded again, this time louder—warning that the enemy was approaching fast and everyone must go to their positions.

Her heart started beating faster. Gendry closed his eyes for a moment before leaning back from her, staring into her eyes again. "It's not too late, Arya—the crypts—"

She shook her head. "You know I can't— Jon needs me. I have to do this."

He tugged her closer by the waist. "I can't lose you—not when I just found you again." She was about to say that he wouldn't—that she defeated death before and that she would simply do it again—but something stopped her. She opened her mouth to speak—but she couldn't find anything to say that would reassure him.

He caressed her cheek. "Just—promise me you won't take any unnecessary risks." It was the best he could ask, honestly. Everything else she couldn't promise.

"I promise."

He captured her lips again. "This isn't our ending— I need you to believe it."

She gripped his face in her hands. "I do."

He kissed her again and she caressed his face one last time. "Stay alive."

The familiar smile she loved so much appeared on his face.

"As milady commands."