"I desperately try to hurt as less as possible the people I love... to see the big picture, to outsmart life. I always succeed in hurting individuals" he started, softly.

"And?"

"I honestly try to do better over and over again... I don't want to hurt you" he looked at her in the eye.

"I don't want you saying sorry again!"

He looked at her and his eyes filled with tears. She squezzed her eyes when noticed and cleaned one of them with her hand, softly.

"I thought that if you left you would have a better chance to be happy. And at this moment, I don't know what I've done, Minerva... "

"That is not what I asked you."

"I won't push you away again..."

"And what are you going to do with me?"

«Is she talking about marriage?» Albus asked in his head.

《It could be》Head!Minerva pondered.

《But everyone here hopes that she doesn't》Gellert added.

"What do you want me to do?" he asked.

"Are you going to do it if I tell you?"

"Yes" He swallowed.

"And what if you don't like it?"

"We will find a way to negotiate" He licked his lips.

"That's what I am trying to do."

"You can not negotiate if the terms are not clear."

"Exactly."

"Please tell me, what do you want."

"That YOU put on the table what do you want, so I can ponder it."

"I want to have a p-personal, close relationship with you."

"And how is that?"

"As in walking by the arm and spending holidays together and going to the Caribbean in summer, or... visiting your parents."

She sighed... deeply.

"It is not enough, is it?" he hugged her closer.

"It is."

"What do you want?" He sighed.

"I will come."

"I will make you happy" he whispered softly.

"No, you won't, but it will make me feel less bad."

He sighed again with the idea of never being able to make her happy. He was better that nothing, but it was not... enough to actually be happy.

"Next question is... difficult."

"Is it?"

"Do you want to return to you... bedroom?"

She froze.

"Or to mine...?"

"You are... this is a difficult one."

"I just don't want you to feel that... sex is compulsory. Y-You Can sleep with me, just sleep, if you want."

"And what do you want?"

"What I want doesn't matter at this moment" He caressed her cheek softly.

"For me, it matters."

"I would want you to come to my bed... and talk, and to make you smile and relax... and hug you, make you feel... good."

She nodded.

"What do YOU want?"

"That."

"You are just agreeing to whatever I'm saying, dear."

"No, I'm agreeing to exactly that, if you have said something different I would have denied your offer."

He smiled softly and looked at her in the eye.

"But..."

"Yes?" He changed his expression.

"There are... conditions."

"I hear you..."

She looked him in the eye, very serious and... took his hand to make him seat again. He again looked her with a very grave look, and squeezed her hand a bit, following her.

"I know what's going to happen now... and I don't want it." Minerva said.

"Which is that?"

"I'm not going to be the merry widow."

"Are you afraid of what people will say once you go back to the school?"

"I'm not afraid, because they are not going to say anything. Is this point clear enough? They are going to say it anyways, but they won't have any proof."

"What you want then is to... be discreet."

"What I want you is to be discreet, yes, because they will say it anyways... especially Elphinstone's family."

"It is not that we have not been discreet for the last... thirty years, dear."

"More discreet."

"More discreet as in... no one can know?"

"Exactly."

"No one as in... who?"

"No one is no one. Not even Aberforth. Not even Pomona or Poppy."

He raised his eyebrows.

"They are going to... know. At least Pomona, Minerva, it is almost impossible that she doesn't realize it."

"You are getting the idea of discretion that I want."

"You want to have a secret... affair with me. Until when?"

She blushed with the "secret affaire" concept

"Is there any other condition besides not telling anyone?"

"This can not happen again. I will decide EVERYTHING about my... love life."

"But Minerva... you've seen..."

"What?"

"How dangerous I am, I'm still impressed that you have agreed... that can only mean one thing" he brushed one strain of her hair."I'm starting to think I'm some sort of a dark wizard in disguise."

"Excuse me?"

"Don't get mad!" He moved forward and kissed her, softly... on the cheek.

"Are you going to do what I ask you?"

"I am... although probably I will complain."

"Anyways you always complain."

"How on earth can YOU tell me that?!"

"Because you do it."

"You are the one who complains!"

"I also do it, but just to turn you on."

He blushed CRIMSON RED. She did. Oh of course she did, and she knew it.

"I'm not talking about sex..." she said when saw that. Albus squeezed his eyes shut. He was indeed thinking about sex.

"I-I never said anything about sex."

"Why did you blush, then?"

"You said turn me on!" He Complained, because he had tasted her so many times, he knew exactly what was being offered.

"I mean... because you need to do the things in a certain way." Minerva explained. He smiled her.

"I'm awful in every single possible way... "

"Yes" She sighed.

"You are still not smiling... "

"No, I'm not."

"Do you have any other requirement?" He took a deep breath

She shook her head to say no. He wasn't sure if he should do something else. Maybe kiss her, but he didn't dare. Not until she smiled.

"Anyways, I don't know when I will get back" She sighed again.

«I'm not being at all convincing... If something I'm being again disappointing» Albus complained again for advice in his head.

《She doesn't seem disappointed, she seems sad. 》Head!Minerva pondered.

«It must not be easy to lose a husband... even if it is some sort of a forced one»

《And she appreciated him》

"Why don't we play chess... and maybe talk a bit about him" he offered softly because in the end, he was fond of him too and after two whole years, he have learned to get used to him, even as her husband... it was someone that was easy to like, nice and decent, he deserved several toasts in a nice and cheerful afternoon, away from the gloom of the conversation.

"I still don't know if is too much early."

"It's been only a few days, It is normal that you are overwhelmed... but it is also normal that at moments you have the need to feel relaxed and forget the tragedy. What would you thing if it was him? What would you want for him?"

" Do you mean If I would have died instead of him?"

"Yes"

"For sure he wouldn't agree come back to someone else after five days."

"If that someone were you... he would."

"But I was the dead one."

"I'm trying to tell you is that... I know that you are still grieving him... but he knew of me and he knew that you would be sad... and you would need moral comfort."

"That was what all his family said..."

"What did they say?"

"That you are waiting and you will come and... do this and... I will... agreed"

"They talked to you about ME? Were they jealous for him?"

"Of course, everybody knew that..." she squezzed her eyes.

"I'm sure they also knew that once you got married... "

"What?"

"Nothing happened between you and me! It is ridiculous that they are harassing you with me at this moment."

"Elphinstone has been jealous since the last day."

"Oh, come on! Why? He had no reason! He knew we were friends, but we were absolutely incapable." He looked at her in the eye and smiled a bit. "I'm sure he knew how harsh are you!"

"He knew... but anyways" She looked at the floor still without smile.

"Then you moved out from school... were you happy here with him?"

"We had... our moments. Like everyone else"

"Life at the castle was so boring without you... no one can play chess"

"I thought you went with Aberforth sometimes."

"I did... once he allowed me again on his bar, he got mad at me when you got married. I think he hates me even more now after I went there a few times."

"You can't tell him about today or... anything!"

"He would get mad at me if he knew I came here and talked with you about this" he caressed her hair again, not thinking too much.

"I shouldn't have said yes..." she leaned a little on him.

"Let's see... explain me exactly why not. Don't you feel better now?"

"Yes... and that feels awful."

"You feel guilty... " he understood, moving in the sofa so she can lean much better on him. Again, he didn't even think about it, it was really natural. "It is all my fault, you should not feel guilty, I am the one to blame."

"But I'm the one who is doing it now... and was doing it the last two years." Minerva sighed moving a little with him.

"He talked to me before your wedding."

"What did he say?"

"He knew everything... and just wanted a chance to make you happy if I was not going to do it. It was not an easy talk but... you know, I think of he would have had the chance to talk to me before he passed away he would have told me to... stop being stupid and do whatever he was not going to be able to do."

She squeezed her eyes and separated again. He took a deep breath.

"There are two options Insee here, Minerva..."

"What?"

"I've lived my entire life... feeling guilty. For the things I could change and for the things I couldn't"

She stared him, listening.

"You were fair, you were genuine with him, he knew every single aspect of you... and he passed away in an accident that had absolutely nothing to do with you. You can feel guilty for your feelings, or you can move on. One is going to make you happy... the other is going to make your life... how would you call it? A living hell..."

She looked him a little bit sad and then at her hands.

"Take your time to adjust... but do not dig into it. Don't focus too much in your guilt specially when you have someone else to blame... you will end up losing everything you love."

"But... this is like... everybody knew and everybody said and... everybody expected. Me being a cruel and cold wife who only was waiting his death and only was married with him because you rejected me."

"Whaaat?" He looked at her.

"Who was always an idiot who loves a man that it's just... not interested, and never was. And when he finally... could get rid of me... My husband passed away in just two years."

"I was interested!"

She sighed because it didn't matter if he didn't show it.

"You are telling the story in the most dramatic possible way, Minerva! Do you want me to tell It the same way but from my perspective?"

"This is just... what someone deduce of all of this. I know you were interested, but just... not so much as me."

"You cannot measure those things! It is like saying that I loved you more than you did! I refuse to keep talking of us as if everything were bad and dramatic, when we've had our whole life together!" He looked at her.

"I can't measure it but I can compare it."

"I can compare that either... and you win on my list."

"Excuse me?"

"I compare you... and sorry but... I know better than you."

"What do you know better than me?"

"How are things with you, and the different is so big I cannot even have a logical measure!"

"What are you talking about?"

"What are you comparing?"

"You... and me."

"You are always going to measure that incorrectly."

"That is what you say."

"No, I know it because of the way you are, you want to be so objective you are a pessimist."

"Of course I want you to be objective!"

"No, you always think the worst. It is indeed a huge advance that you think now that I actually love you" he looked at her calmly.

"Of course not, I just see the thinks as they are."

"Do you think you have a SPECIAL ability to see things they are that we do not" he smiled a bit. He LOVED to discuss with her, "Minerva, admit that you are always thinking the worst."

"I don't!"

"You still think I asked you to marry him for no reason."

"No, no for any reason, just to have a little peace."

"Peace."

"Yes."

He could hear Gellert laughing on his head with the concept of peace.

"So you think I had two beautiful years of peace... until there was the inconvenience of Elphinstone passing away..." he closed his eyes. "That's pessimistic and I think I don't want to discuss it."

"Yes."

"Come here."

She looked at him and he got closer to her, looking at her in the eye. She put her hands in his shoulders.

He was about to let her see an awful memory of him. When he... thought better. And decided just to get closer and place his lips on hers, softly and she kissed him back.

He felt guilty, and hoped not being too much, not bringing this to the limit. Not make her worse. But would not restrain himself of kissing her DEEPLY as soon as possible.

But she wasn't thinking and he just missed her sooooo much. Also she missed him almost until the craziness.

This is the last time you two play the stupid game of being apart. He is sorry for the memory of Elphinstone but... he only wants to be with her.

She wasn't sorry, she was lost exactly now. And this is what happens when you don't start doing this in the 80s, but... 30 years earlier. He know EXACTLY what to do, without any problem. He doesn't even hesitate, as if he were writing or doing lumos.

Minerva hugged him to get him closer. I think he is a disaster, finishing ridiculously fast, EVEN at his age. Two years of not even touching himself are difficult. It doesn't matter, she was still kissing him and caressing him in the sofa.

Can he stay here forever?

Yes.

She should never EVER listen to him again. EVER

She won't.

No wonder, even HE agrees.

You remember the snow and the bubbles in the shape of hearts? I think tomorrow then room will have a trillion of blossoming flowers around them. Maybe they will wake up in the Caribbean.

Mmmm... I don't think so. In fact, i don't think that they will be on it for so long at it seems-

Phew! Can she smile, please?

No... i'm sorry. Not yet.

He is very, very, VERY worried about that. She has to smile again.

No... At some point, she will do it, eventually, but not yet.

He is going to obsess with that.