Part V: Confessions

"And…that's the gist of it."

He cringed as he let his hands drop to his sides, watching with growing sympathy as his mother struggled to keep her composure. He hardly felt satisfied with that closing statement. There was still so much more to discuss with her, as he hadn't gone into any extensive detail as to how he came to know that their world wasn't real, but she needed a break, that much he could see. Not surprisingly, her face seemed to be frozen in a permanent state of shock and horror, and he felt inclined to sit himself next to her on the cracked sidewalk and hold her. He didn't get the chance, however, as it wasn't long until she abruptly stood up and began pacing back and forth, her hands laced together and pressing against her mouth as she digested every bit of information her son had laid out for her.

"I…I don't know what to say," she murmured. "This…How did you even…? When…?"

She couldn't even formulate a complete sentence. How was one supposed to respond to the revelation that their world wasn't real and that they were just part of some silly children's cartoon? It was probably only because of the fact that she found herself standing here in this strange, static dimension that she didn't dismiss what Rob had told her outright. He had never been one to lie to her about anything, anyway.

Rob became fidgety and averted his gaze as he noticed his mother suddenly focus her attention on him, and the look in her eye seemed to suggest that something else was troubling her.

"How long?" she finally asked after an incredibly long silence. There was obvious fear in her tone.

"How long…what?" her son asked as he reluctantly looked back at her.

Her brow furrowed as a hard frown set deep into her features, beads of sweat gradually appearing around her hairline. "How long has it been since this all first happened?" Her blue skin seemed to fade more and more to a sickly gray. As frightening as it was to learn that their world wasn't real, the thought of her son surviving on his own with no one to look after him was even scarier.

"Oh…well…" Rob glanced downward as he twiddled his thumbs anxiously, really not wanting to disclose that piece of information. He could vaguely make out Gumball sitting just a few feet away from him, his arms folded over his knees as he intently listened to the pair converse. His silence during the entire exchange between him and his mother had greatly surprised him, as he seemed to always have something to say about something. Even when his mother had turned to shoot the cat a disapproving glare when he had explained how the boy and his brother had overlooked him the first time he had been trapped in the Void, he simply looked away in silent shame, feeling no desire to defend himself.

"It's…It's been over a year, Mom," Rob finally told her softly, wincing inwardly, and then outwardly as well when he heard her gasp. He chanced a glance at her, pained by the sight of her covering her mouth and clutching at her chest as she turned her body away from him. He was quick to notice she was unsteady, and he jumped to his feet to rush to her side. "Mom, just sit down," he said gently as he took her by the shoulders and guided her back to the ground.

She moved her hand over to the left of her chest as she felt her heart palpating. "I've been stuck here…and you've been alone out there all this time?"

Rob's only answer to that was to squeeze her shoulder.

"How in the world did you get by?! Where were you staying?! How did you eat?!"

Typical mom questions, though he supposed they were perfectly reasonable ones.

"Mom…"

"No, I want to know, Rob! Tell me!"

The teen rested his hands on his knees as he let his gaze fall to his feet. He turned his head to where the back of it was facing her, but he could still feel her eye boring into the back of his skull, silently demanding an answer.

"I just…scraped together whatever money I could find, I don't know," he said with a shrug. "Sometimes I'd get lucky and just find money on the ground that someone had dropped, and sometimes…sometimes I'd resort to pick-pocketing." He winced with shame, hoping she wouldn't judge him too harshly for that. "As far as shelter…I just found places that looked dry and….okay, not comfortable, but a step up from sleeping on the cold ground, let's just say that. I did a lot of squatting, mostly, but there was one time I slept in an old car…at the scrapyard." He winced just as soon as the words left his mouth. Crud, why did I have to tell her that?

Biting his lip, he slowly turned his head to look at her again. Her expression was about as horrified as he would have expected, but now he noticed Gumball was looking at him with an equally horrified expression.

"Dude, why didn't you just come to us? You could've crashed in the basement again! That's better than some rusty old car!" he finally chimed in before Rob's mother could properly express her own shock.

"Right, like I'm just going to skip merrily up to my nemesis' front door and ask for a place to sleep," the young cyclops quipped as he waved a dismissive hand.

"Nemesis? So you two aren't friends now?" Pam glanced between the two boys, who were now looking rather embarrassed and avoiding eye contact with each other. It was another painful reminder that Rob still had a lot to explain to his mother.

"It's…It's really stupid, okay? Our relationship's a bit complicated," he answered vaguely. "But…we've made peace with it, I suppose," he added, noting the brief smile that crossed the cat's face.

"Wait…" Pam held up both hands in a stopping gesture. "Rob, you said you escaped…and that's why you look like this. But if you escaped, then what are you doing here now?"

Both boys visibly paled as they glanced at each other, knowing what this conversation would devolve into. Pam was still clueless of her son's misdeeds, but there'd be no avoiding the subject now.

"I…I did something bad…which led me here." He waited to see if she'd say anything, but she just kept waiting for him to elaborate, so he decided it'd be easier to just rip the band-aid off in one quick pull. "I kidnapped someone," he stated bluntly, closing his eye as he braced for her response.

"WHAT?!"

He had expected her anger, but it still affected him profoundly, causing him to fumble over his words as he continued. "S-She…Banana Barbara…I d-don't know if y-you know her, b-but umm…" Rob paused to take a breath. "Look, don't a-ask me how, but she c-can predict the future, okay? Or…she paints it. Everything she paints…it happens." He was hardly surprised when she just gawked at him as though he had spoken to her in a foreign language.

"Yeah, I can vouch for that," Gumball cut in as he noted her skepticism. "It sounds nuts, but it's true. I've seen it for myself."

This piece of information almost didn't register with her, as she was still reeling over her son's admission. She held her tongue long enough to let him elaborate, but there was no hiding the anger burning in her eye.

"I wanted her to paint the future," Rob reluctantly continued. "I wanted to know what was going to happen next…how the story ended. But then…" Rob threw a nervous glance at Gumball. "Umm…"

"But then we showed up," Gumball finished for him, getting to his feet. "Me, my brother Darwin, and Banana Joe."

"But how did you end up here?" Pam asked again as she turned back to Rob. Her expression seemed to soften somewhat as she noticed her son's breathing becoming more labored. "Rob…just tell me," she pleaded gently as her hand found its way to his back in a show of comfort.

There was no ignoring the horrible stab of guilt that Gumball felt, knowing his actions had quite obviously traumatized the boy. "It was my fault," he finally said, as he could no longer watch the teen continue to struggle with the memory. "We…I mean…I…" Pam's eye was on him now, while Rob just stared at the ground. "Rob had attacked us when we showed up, and well…we forced Barbara to…to um…erase him." He waited for her rage, but she just looked confused. "See…she could alter the paintings, add things, erase things, that sort of thing. If she erased something, or…someone in the painting, it would erase them in the present. So…that's what we did with Rob. We made her erase him from her painting, which…yeah."

There were a few moments of awkward silence, which only made the situation more tense. As the female cyclops slowly rose to her feet with a threatening posture, Gumball couldn't help but think that if he died by her hands, then he at least wouldn't have to face the wrath of all of Elmore when they inevitably ended up here. He could always look on the bright side of things.

"You did what?" she snarled through clenched teeth, startling her son. "You mean to tell me you sent him back to this place?!"

"I know, I know, it was a horrible thing to do! I…We weren't thinking! I didn't know that…" Gumball held up his paws defensively as he instinctively backed away once he noticed the woman start to make a move towards him. "Man, I am not making a good first impression today, am I?" he sputtered through nervous laughter.

"Mom, stop!" Rob interjected as he jumped to his feet and grabbed his mother's arm before she could advance on the cat any further. "Did you hear what he just said? Did you hear anything I've said? I kidnapped someone! I attacked them! Yeah, getting erased wasn't exactly pleasant, but I brought it on myself! I did something horrible! I'm horrible! I'm…I'm the worst person to ever exist! You have no idea how many horrible things I've done!" He paused to take a breath, shaking his head. "But…I'm going to tell you. You need to know. You need to know everything."

"Wait…Rob-"

Rob held up a hand before the cat could finish. "No, Gumball. You know I have to tell her."

"Tell me what?" his mother asked him fearfully, not entirely sure she wanted to know the answer. Her eye darted back and forth between the two boys.

"What I've become…what kind of person I am now!"

Gumball rushed to stand in front of the boy before he could continue, turning to Pam with a pleading gaze. "I just want to state for the record that all this was partially my fault!" he stated urgently. "I was the one who put the idea in his head to become a villain!"

"What…What in the world are you talking about?! Villain?"

Rob shoved the cat out of the way with an annoyed grunt. "Knock it off, Gumball. You're not going to be so quick to defend me when you know the truth!"

"What're you even talking about? You think I already forgot about you trying to blow us up with that bomb?"

If Pam's eye had been any bigger, it would have easily taken up the entire circumference of her head. "BOMB?!" she screeched as she jerked her head back towards her son. "WHAT BOMB?!"

The cat sighed as he swung a paw up to smack himself in the face. "Dagnabbit." He looked to the other boy apologetically, but Rob didn't seem that bothered.

"I was going to tell her, anyway," he reassured him before meeting his mother's gaze again, his shoulders falling when he saw just how distraught she looked, but he knew he couldn't back out now. "I blamed Gumball and Darwin for what happened to me, and when I couldn't remember who I was…I didn't know what my purpose was, or what I was meant to do…but when I recalled what happened here, when I left this void…I thought I could play that role. If I truly had to have a purpose in order to exist in the real world, then I was prepared to fill that role as the villain, fueled by genuine anger towards him," he finished as he indicated to the boy standing next to him, who was now looking down and fiddling with the hem of his sweater.

"But a bomb, Rob? A BOMB?!" The woman shook her head defiantly. "I'm not hearing this! There's no way I'm hearing this right now!"

"No one got hurt, though!" Gumball interjected quickly, much to Rob's annoyance. "It really wasn't that big a deal! I-I mean, we're just a cartoon, r-right? You know how things are in cartoons! Stuff like that isn't nearly as serious, and we were never meant to get hurt, so it's all fine!"

"Gumball, stop trying to defend me!"

"But I just-"

"No! I want you to listen closely to what I'm about to say next…because once you hear this, you're gonna wish you had never come here looking for me, okay?! You're gonna wish you had just left me here to rot! You wanted to know how I know all this is just a TV show…well, here it is." He turned back to his still horrified mother as he irritably ran a hand across his eye to rid himself of the gathering tears. "I'm sorry I wasn't better. You deserve better than me."

Before Pam could even open her mouth to protest his statement, Rob was already confessing his shame, explaining how he had happened upon the universal remote and how he had used it to nearly wipe Gumball from existence, though certainly not skimping on the details of what had happened to his family prior to that. He struggled the most to relay what had happened to Darwin, unable to shake the image of Gumball's rage and grief from his mind as he watched his brother perish. Even now, he still couldn't believe he had allowed himself to go so far.

Once he had finished, he struggled to muster the will to look up, afraid of seeing his mother's face and the shame that would undoubtedly reside there. When he finally did look at her, however, he saw that she had completely turned her back to him, which hurt just as much, if not more so. He chanced a look at Gumball, who he saw had taken a seat on the sidewalk and was looking off somewhere else as he seemed to be processing everything he had just heard. There had been plenty of times throughout his confession when the boy looked angry, but now he just seemed to be at a loss for words.

"I told you, Gumball," Rob said softly. The cat slowly looked at him, eyes wet and ears pressed flat against his head. "I know I can't expect you to forgive me for this. I'm…I'm sorry." He was sincere in his words, but whether that meant anything to the feline, he didn't know.

It took a few moments before the younger boy could finally bring himself to respond. Rob would have welcomed his anger, but his words were soft and completely devoid of contempt. "It didn't really happen, though. I mean…you undid the damage. You didn't have to, but you did."

Rob sighed as he rubbed the space above his eye. Why was this boy so insistent on making excuses for him?

"I remember it, so it might as well have happened. I still tried to get rid of you and your family! Did you not listen to me at all?"

"But you didn't go through with it. You knew it was wrong and you stopped it from happening." Gumball crossed his arms as he looked at the ground, kicking a pebble. "I mean…I'm not happy to know you tried to do something like that. It hurts, Rob… but we weren't exactly friends, and you did warn me that you were going to destroy me and everything I loved so…" The boy shrugged. "Par for the course, I guess." He forced a weak smile, his lip quivering.

"You can't be serious," the teen contested him. "I nearly wiped you from existence! Your…Your family, Gumball!"

The cat held up his hand as he looked Rob firmly in the eye. "Rob…just stop, okay? I'm glad you told me, and I do forgive you. Maybe if we were in a different situation right now, I'd feel more inclined to be mad, but I just can't bring myself to be angry over something that didn't technically happen. It's too much energy, and you know how lazy I am." He finished his statement with the smallest of smiles, hoping he had managed to ease the boy's conscience, but his smile faded when he saw Rob suddenly look towards his mother expectedly. Maybe he had forgiven him, but his mother had yet to say a single word following his confession. He waited for the backlash, but her silence persisted.

"Mom?" he called softly to her.

More silence.

Rob watched, pained and guilt-ridden as his mother slowly walked away from him, stopping when she got to the edge of the platform. She drew her arms up to hug herself as she stared out across the static dimension, leaving Rob to stare at her back in anticipation for her reaction. Eventually, her silence became unbearable.

"Mom…say something," he goaded her softly, his heart wincing when she still did not say a word. He only managed to take a few steps towards her before dropping to his knees, head bowed. "Say anything…please. Tell me how ashamed you are of me! Tell me how disappointed you are! T-Tell me…that what I did was unforgivable…that I'm wretched and…and that you wish…." He swallowed the lump in his throat as he struggled to squeak out his final words, "…that I wasn't your son."

His words struck her like a bolt of lightening, and she finally turned to look at him, mouth agape in disbelief.

Rob kept his head bowed as he sat hunched over on the ground, shoulders quivering as he fought back the sobs that threatened to rack his body. He cringed fearfully and ducked his head even lower as he heard the sound of flat heels clacking loudly against the ground, drawing closer and closer to him with urgent strides. Within seconds, he could feel his mother towering over him, and he stiffened with anticipation as she dropped to her knees in front of him. Though she had never once raised her hand to him as a child, he felt he had done more than enough to warrant it this time. However, instead of feeling the harsh sting of a slap to the face, he felt his mother's hands against his shoulders, pushing him back slightly.

"Look at me." She gave him a light shake when he didn't obey. "I said look at me."

Finally opening his eye, Rob slowly lifted his head, meeting her gaze as best he could through his tears while gritting his teeth in expectance of a verbal lashing.

"Do you really think that little of me?" she asked sternly.

The question genuinely shocked him. "Wha…? No, I-"

"Do you honestly think…?" Closing her eye, Pam paused to take a breath, her composure slipping. She blinked away her tears as she tightened her grip on Rob's shoulders. "Yes, I'm angry. Yes, I'm disappointed…because I know you're better than that! You know you're better than that!" Her eye softened as she reached up to brush away his tears with her thumb. "You wouldn't be feeling all this shame if you didn't. You were always such a gentle soul. You always tried to make everyone happy and help those who needed it."

"I know…I'm sorry," Rob cried as he attempted to look down again, but his mother was quick to slip her hand under his chin to force him to look back up at her.

"Nothing…and I mean nothing would ever make me wish you weren't my son. You're my whole world, and I couldn't bear to lose you. You're all I have."

Despite her reassurance, his shame didn't waver. "I…I felt like I had no choice. I mean…I guess in a way, I didn't, but…I know I didn't want to come back to this place. I never wanted to spend another second trapped here…even if that meant being the resident villain. If that's what it took, then…" The boy shook his head, squeezing his eye shut as anger overcame him again. At that moment, he felt grateful to have his mother's hands clutching him tightly. "I couldn't see past it. I was selfish and short-sighted but I just…I couldn't go through it again! I didn't want to-" He was silenced as he felt the gentle pressure of his mother's fingers against his lips. His eye locked with hers, which he saw was glistening.

"I know not all this is your fault," she said gently. "You never should have had to go through any of this." Sighing, she shook her head as her expression darkened with contempt. "Whatever forces are at work here…I'll never forgive them for what they've done to you."

Rob held her gaze for several moments before letting it fall to his lap again. "No…I…This is all on me….This is what I deserve."

Pam squeezed his shoulders again. "Rob…"

"No!" he cut her off sharply. "I can't foist blame on someone else! Being stuck here is the least I deserve!"

"Dude, you got a bum deal in all this," Gumball reasoned gently as he stepped over to stand beside the other boy, who partially turned his head to glance at him out of the corner of his eye. "This whole situation is just all kinds of messed up, and it's not like you just randomly woke up one day and said 'Gee, I think being an evil villain might be worth a few kicks!'. This isn't what you wanted. You never wanted this to happen. I mean…how exactly do you fight back when your story's dictated by the whims of a TV show writer?" Gumball paused, his ears flattening against his head as he looked off in another direction with a thousand yard stare. "Man…I'm still trying to grapple with that."

Rob considered his point, but it was hardly enough to quell his guilt. "I don't know how to make it right," he said softly, feeling his mother's hand against his cheek again, turning his head towards her.

"Admitting your mistakes is the first big step you can take. Now…you have to make it right to those you've wronged."

As he absorbed his mother's words, Rob slowly turned to Gumball, who smiled at him softly as he raised a hand to stop him from speaking. "Hey…I already said I forgive you for the whole trying to erase me from existence thing. And all that other stuff…honestly, it was kinda cool. I mean, fighting on the wing of a plane? Totally awesome!" He noticed Pam gaping at him and he quickly waved a hand, adding, "Don't ask."

The cyclops shook his head as he looked to his lap again. "I still can't fathom how you can just brush it off."

"Like I said…too lazy to hold a grudge."

Rob slowly looked up to meet his mother's gaze again. "I'm sorry," he repeated to her with every ounce of sincerity he had. "I'm sorry…I'm sorry."

"I know you are," Pam said to him, her hand on his face again. "If there's one thing I taught you…it was to always admit your mistakes. In time…you'll learn to forgive yourself."

The boy slowly shook his head, making his mother frown sadly. "No…never."

Pam said nothing, sighing as she brought the boy back into her arms. It pained her how desperately he clung to her, a harsh reminder that he had in fact gone so long without her care and guidance, whereas to her it still felt like she had only seen him just a couple of hours ago. She felt her eye sting with tears again as she leaned her cheek against the top of his head, feeling what she could only imagine was a shred of the helplessness he must have felt for so many months. "I'm sorry I wasn't there," she finally croaked.

Rob shook his head lightly. "No…you don't have to apologize for anything. It wasn't your fault," he assured her. He felt her shudder and he quickly moved to wrap his arms around her back. "Don't cry."

Gumball had kept his distance for as long as he thought was appropriate, but now the boy was fidgeting as he stood off to the side, ashamed of the fact that he felt left out. He knew it was their moment, and he shouldn't intrude, but he held back as long as he could before finally slinking his way over to them and dropping down to his knees to grab Rob around the waist. Feeling the teen's eye on him, he gave a tearful chuckle.

"Sorry…I kinda wanted to be a part of the family togetherness."

"Well…you do always have to insert yourself into everything," Rob teased softly.

"I'm the main character, it's kinda outta my hands."

Rob smiled as he rolled his eye, pulling away from his mother to grab the boy in a side hug, which only encouraged Gumball to wiggle more into his embrace. He caught his mother's eye momentarily, noticing the tiniest flicker of disapproval as she stared down at the cat, still clearly less than pleased with him. "Don't hate him, Mom," he said to her, bringing her attention back to him. "Trust me…it's not worth the effort," he added with a laugh. "He came all this way for me…even if it meant never being able to go back." He looked down at the boy as he thought back to the incident with the remote, adding, "Twice, in fact."

There were a few moments of tense silence before Pam finally sighed, her face softening . She noticed the feline seemed to be holding his breath as he gazed up at her fearfully, which prompted her to reach over to pet the top of his head. "Fine. If Rob can put it behind him, then I suppose I can, too." Her eye suddenly narrowed in a show of warning. "But if you ever-"

"I won't, I swear!" Gumball interjected swiftly, shaking his head. "Nope, no more erasing Rob from existence! That's a promise!"

Pam nodded slowly. "Good. Otherwise, you're gonna have me to worry about." Her tone was firm, but her smile lessened the intensity of her warning.

Gumball relaxed slightly, though his laughter still harbored noticeable nervousness. "Y-Yeah, my mom's already enough to deal with, thanks," he chuckled.

Rob let out a slow, quiet breath, relieved that the last traces of animosity that hung in the air had finally dissipated. Now he was left to ponder where they went from here, and it was clear from the looks on the others' faces that they were wondering the same. It didn't seem quite as demoralizing now that he wasn't alone, though he felt incredibly guilty for being grateful of their presence.

A few moments of silence passed, and Pam slowly lifted her gaze upward, craning her neck as she did so.

"So…this is our life now," she said to the static world above.

Another long silence followed her statement, Rob and Gumball silently glancing at each other before looking back at the woman remorsefully.

"It'll be okay, Mom."

Pam slowly let her head fall back to its natural position. The corner of her mouth twitched as she struggled to muster a faint smile. "Thirteen years I spent reassuring you…telling you your nightmares couldn't hurt you, always promising that everything would be all right and that I'd always be there…and now this. Now here you are telling me that everything's going to be okay after having our world completely turned upside down. But it's not okay…is it?" Her eye became wet again as she regarded the boy with heavy regret. "You were…I couldn't…" Her hands came to her face, fingers gliding through her dark brown hair.

Gumball startled slightly as he felt Rob suddenly shift, quickly moving to place himself directly beside his mother. "Mom, don't," he pleaded as he reached for one of her hands. "It wasn't your fault."

"I'm your mother, Rob…and when you're a mom, it hardly matters whether something's your fault. I'm supposed to protect you, I'm supposed to be there when you need help…and I wasn't. I wasn't there…and I…I'm never going to be able to make peace with that."

Biting his lip, Rob could only manage to squeeze his mother's hand as he leaned over to rest his head on her shoulder.

Author's Note: Okay, so...once again, things didn't turn out as planned, and I ended up splitting this chapter as well. This would have been the last chapter right before the epilogue, but I really didn't want to have to deal with a super long chapter, and honestly, it felt like like this section needed to be its own chapter. I apologize that this update has taken so long and I'd like to say that the next one will be soon but...the next chapter still isn't done and it's giving me a headache, so I must ask again that everyone hang tight.

Honestly, I feel like i should say something about the finale here, but...there's not too many positive things I can say and I really don't want to spill my salt all over the place. I want to say I'm still processing it but I know that's not the case. I've already processed it, and now I'm just angry and depressed. I thought The Future wrecked me emotionally, but no...that was a just a warm up. And it sucks because I feel like I'm the only person who legit wants nothing to do with the last episode and would rather pretend it doesn't exist.