The Story Tittle

I do not own RWBY

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"Speech"

'Effects'

Regular text

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The following PREVIEW has been approved for

NO AUDIENCES

By the "They'd Sue Me If I Used Their Name Association"

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The dance hall of Beacon Academy was decorated with streamers, balloons, and the fanciest dining sets that Weiss could order. The tables and chairs as well as all the doilies, yes doilies too, were white with a light blue tinge. Everything was coordinated and perfect.

The party was going great and had been in swing for a few hours now. The people were getting along swimmingly and the mood was perfect.

"Laugh, laugh, laugh, laugh."
"Laugh, Laugh."

'Ting, ting, ting.'

"Laugh, laugh, laugh, laugh, laugh."
"Laugh."

Everyone in the hall quieted down and stopped to turn and look at the person who'd tapped their glass. Jaune Arc stood tall at the center of the hall with a bottle of champagne in his left hand, raising a flute of it in his right while smiling at those gathered.

"A toast, establishing me as the wealthy successful protagonist. Who is handsome."

Everyone raised their glasses while some clinked theirs together.

'clink'

'forks hitting plates, glasses being placed down."

Weiss rolled her eyes.
"Murmur and a grin."

Yang: "Talking to each other."
Ruby: "About pointless things."

Coco: "Not actually saying anything coherent."
Velvet: "Nodding like I understand."

Fox: "Looking around admiring the decorations despite my character being blind."
Yatsuhashi: "Smacking my face in disbelief at Fox."

Sun: "Just standing here in the background to fill up space."
Neptune: "Checking out Weiss despite our characters never getting together."
David: "Critiquing the clothes of the women at the party."
Sage: "Eating… as much free food… as possible… between lines."

Ren pat's Jaune on the shoulder and pulls him away from the party once everyone has gotten into their own groove again.

He leads Jaune to the gazebo just outside and turns to face him with a calm expression as he leans back against the rail.

Ren: "Friendly concern that something may be missing from your life."

Jaune: "Confidence that nothing is missing in my life."

Ren pushes off the rail reaching a hand out with a worried look.

Ren: "Interrupted statement…"

Jaune: "Reassurance that my good fortune will not waver."

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Later that night at Jaune's new house in Vale.
'Knock, knock, knock."

Jaune walks down the stairs in his house while rubbing his face.
Jaune: "Unnecessary question to myself about who could be at the door at this hour."

Jaune opens the door to see a woman wearing a red dress standing there with a young man about his own age sitting in a wheelchair. He looks at the woman for a second before glancing at the guy tilting his head at the vacant look he gets in return.

Cinder gestures to Mercury while fixing Jaune with an indifferent look.
Cinder: "Introduction of character named Mercury suffering from the most topical disability of the present year. Said retard is now under your custody."

Jaune gapes at the woman and looks at the boy named Mercury in disbelief.

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Jaune and Mercury head back to the car after a long day of grocery shopping. Mercury Slaps the bags out of Jaune's hands spilling the groceries everywhere.

Mercury (Using a retarded voice while smiling): "Now my catchphrase."

One of Jaune's eyebrows tweaks and he forces a smile to his face while looking at Mercury while picking up the groceries.
Jaune: "Frustration with these new circumstances."

A tall pale skinned girl with long black hair hands back one of Jaune's dropped groceries giving him a curious look.
Blake: "Admiration at your seeming selflessness."

Jaune: "Interest in your bold rejection of social norms as evidence by the large bow in your hair."

Blake smirks at him as he takes the can.
Blake: "My name."

Jaune: "My name."

Mercury: "Catchphrase"

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Time skip by about a week played in a montage of Jaune taking care of Mercury and getting to know Blake.
Jaune sits down on a bench next to the street outside his favorite diner while his friend Ren adjusts something in his car.
Jaune: "Relief at having found meaning in my life."

Ren: "Friendly concern that a string of heightened and seemingly unrelated plots may now arise."

Jaune just blinks and looks at Ren with an accusing glare.
Jaune: "Dude!"

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From Aworldnotsosimple

Not really

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Cut to a random Scene of Jaune and Blake in bed together arguing.
Jaune: "Differences are surfacing between us."

Blake pulls out her scroll and shows Jaune a picture of David Scarlet kissing his cheek.
Blake: "Accusations about your sexuality!"

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Cut to a scene of Jaune standing opposite Ozpin's desk with a shocked look before he turns and walks away.
Jaune: "Suspicion that a character once thought trustworthy may not be trustworthy."

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Cut to a scene of Jaune sitting with Qrow outside a bar watching Ruby as she makes her way down the road while Qrow shrugs.
Qrow: "Cold comment about family never being easy to deal with that has nothing to do with Ruby."

Jaune: "And I've gotta use tough love to help that young woman believe in herself.

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Cut to a scene of Jaune in a courtroom standing next to James Ironwood as the premier judge in Vale glares down at them.
Jaune: "Also I must prove innocent this incredibly humble human male."

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Cut to a Scene of Jaune on the island of Menagerie with dark clouds covering the sky in a depressing overcast.
Jaune: "Also I've decided to fight with the moderate white fang metaphor against the radical white fang metaphor."

There's a loud staccato of bullets and several explosions as Jaune gasps and hits the dirt.

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A series of rapid cuts to dramatic parts in the story with a final scene of Jaune soaked and covered in blood reaching up towards the cloudy raining sky.
Jaune: "LEAD FEMALES NAME!"

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Scene cut to Mercury looking out a window into a rainstorm while Blake sits crying next to him. He reaches out and rubs her shoulder giving her a smile.
Mercury: "A naive yet inspiring statement, and then the music gets hopeful."

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Cut to a scene much earlier in the story with Ren sitting across from Jaune in their office building arguing while they're supposed to be working.
Ren: "Specific outlining of your major character flaws."

Jaune: "Overreaction!"

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Cut to a scene about halfway through the story with Jaune looking depressed while talking to Sage from team SSSN about life making the dark skinned young man chuckle.
Sage: "Friendly black optimistic advice."

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Cut to a scene about three fourths of the way through the story. Blake running as fast as she can to reach Jaune in time.
Blake: "Passionate plea, whispered repetition."

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Sun is just sitting on a spinning rolly chair in his, Ren's and Jaune's office drinking a glass of wine while spinning around and leaning back really far.
Sun: "This scene doesn't make it into the final cut of the story."

He almost spills his wine and jerks back making the chair tip over with a loud crash.

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Cut to a scene at the end of the story where Ren is giving a speech to everyone who had a part in the story. His vice slowly getting louder and more charismatic as he reaches the end.
Ren: "Inspiring final line of a speech that douchbags will quote on their facebook profiles!"

The crowd: "Cheers!"

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Jaune Arc - Academy award winning actor

Blake Belladonna - Academy award winning actress

Ruby Rose - Actress desperately trying for an academy award

Cinder Fall - Older actress in a comeback attempt

Lei Ren - Beloved actor who died this year (Rest in peace Monty Oum)

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Fade to black before fading in on an unknown part of the story revealing Jaune sitting at a desk with his computer on. He rests back in his chair and smiles while looking up at the woman standing beside him.

Jaune: "Explicitly stating the moral of the story."
He lets out a happy sigh and looks at his computer screen.
Jaune: "And awkwardly working in… The Story Tittle."

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Cut to the end of the story with everyone sitting around in a room with warm looks on their faces.

Mercury: "Oh! Catchphrase."

Everyone in the room turns and looks at him with content smiles.
Everyone: "Laugh, laugh, laugh, laugh."

Jaune looks towards the audience and smiles.
Jaune: "See. It's not gonna me an entirely dramatic story. Because we laughed there."

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Authors notes

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I own nothing but my own twist.

Hope this made some people laugh.