"My tears have been my food day and night." Psalm 42:4

Chapter Theme: "Darkness" by Disturbed

"Mommy."

Chloe grunted and turned over in bed. She pulled the sheet over her head, hoping she would be left alone. No such luck. "Mommy!" Trixie sat on the edge of the bed. She bounced and swung her legs back and forth. The movement jostled Chloe. She covered her face with her hands. Her body curled in on itself until her nose nearly touched her knees.

Trixie patted the top of Chloe's head. Her dark blonde hair was stringy and matted. Trixie lay down behind her. She took hold of her shoulder and shook her. "Mommy, I'm hungry!"

She slowly sat up. She rubbed her eyes and looked at her little girl through a film of tears. She was relieved to see that at least she was in pajamas, too. The night Lucifer left - that same hour - Chloe had put on her pink cotton nightgown. She had gone to bed, and she hadn't left it since. How long ago had that been?

Chloe sniffled and ran a hand through her hair. It was greasy, nasty. Her nightgown clung to her skin, damp with sweat. Her stomach rumbled with hunger. "See? You're hungry, too! Come on, Mommy, let's go get something to eat!"

Trixie took her hand and pulled. "Get up, let's go. There's nothing to eat here." Chloe blinked and shook her head. "Nothing to eat? Baby, how long exactly have I been...asleep?"

"You've been in your room since Lucifer went away, so…" Trixie's face scrunched in concentration. "I think that was about a week ago."

"A week?" Chloe gasped and covered her mouth. Her sobs were muffled, and fresh tears blurred her vision. The last seven days had gone by in a haze. She remembered calling the station, telling them she was taking some time off. When she'd hung up, she had thrown her cell phone against the wall so roughly it shattered.

Everything after that was blank. "What happened while I was sleeping?"

"Daddy called. He wondered where you were. I told him you were sick, but you'd call him back when you felt better." Trixie bit her bottom lip and looked down at the sheet. If she looked into her mother's eyes, she might start to cry, too.

"Who's been taking care of you?" Chloe's voice shook. "Maze came by a few days ago, but I've mostly been taking care of myself."

"Oh, God…" Chloe wrapped her arms around Trixie. She pulled her back and rested her chin on top of her head. "Oh, no, Trixie!"

"What, Mommy? I can take care of myself; I'm almost eleven!" Trixie huffed indignantly. "I've done a pretty good job. The only reason I'm bothering you now is because we don't have anymore bread, or milk for cereal...or cereal, for that matter." She laughed and squirmed out of Chloe's hold.

"Oh, baby, you're not bothering me! I'm sorry you feel like you are, and...I'm sorry I haven't been here for you." She held Trixie again. "I'm sorry."

"It's OK, Mommy, I heard you the first time." Trixie scoffed and rolled her eyes. "Anyway, there's no food here! Get dressed so we can go to the store!"

"Whoa, honey, wait a minute. What - what day is it?"

"Wednesday."

"Then why aren't you in school? Summer break doesn't start for three weeks."

Trixie smiled bashfully and lowered her gaze. "I, uh, thought I'd take some time off, too."

"Oh no, you're not." Chloe got out of bed on shaky legs. She held onto the bedside table to steady herself. "I'm calling your dad. You are going to school, young lady."

"But why?" Trixie pouted. She crossed her arms over her chest and glared. "We've already taken our exams, and I passed! All we do now is sit around doing dumb stuff, anyway. Besides, you broke your phone."

Chloe smirked. She ran a hand through her hair and choked back a bitter retort. "Honey, we still have this little thing called the landline." When she felt that she could walk steadily, Chloe left the bedroom. Trixie trailed after her, murmuring half-hearted protests. She knew she'd been lucky to have as much time off as she'd had.

Chloe sauntered through the kitchen. The landline was a vintage green rotary dial, the same phone her parents had used in the 80's. Chloe leaned the handset on her shoulder and slowly dialed Dan's cell number.

It rang twice. "Hello?" Dan's voice was clear and clipped. "Dan…" Chloe spoke barely above a whisper. "Yes, hello? Who's this?"

"Dan, it's me."

"Chloe, what's up? Are you OK, you've been out for a while. How's Trixie?"

"Yup, it's been a week today, apparently. I was actually calling about Trixie."

"What's wrong? Is she alright?" Dan's tone rose an octave. Chloe closed her eyes and took a deep breath before answering. "She's fine, but...I'm not, obviously." Her voice faltered. She once again felt hot tears gather in her eyes.

"She hasn't been going to school. And I've been...out of it."

"She's been out of school for an entire week?" Dan gasped. Before he went off on her, Chloe burst into tears. "I'm sorry, Dan. I shouldn't have let her - I should have paid more attention. I wish I wasn't like this, believe me! But I'm just...Dan, I haven't felt this bad since Dad died."

Dan sighed. Chloe could picture him closing his eyes, rubbing his forehead with his free hand.

"Have you called Linda?"

"No. You're the only one I've called. She has a newborn to take care of."

"Yeah, but don't you think -"

"I called you," Chloe said flatly. "I need you to look after Trixie for a while. I can't - I can't do that right now." Behind her, Trixie sniffled. She slipped her fingers through Chloe's.

"OK," Dan said. "I'll be there in about half an hour. Have her pack her things. She can stay with me until - well."

"You can say it. 'Until I get my head screwed on straight.' " She laughed bleakly. "Thanks, Dan."

"Of course. I'll see you in a little while."