Penny was right: kids love the ocean. Leonard thought buying a house by the ocean would be a waste of money, there were tons of other options in family-friendly neighborhoods with good schools, located much closer to their friends' houses. Besides, Leonard was never a fan of beaches. But when he saw the delight on both of his daughters faces as they reached the living room and noticed the ocean in a few feet from their new home, he loved this place immediately. Wyatt and Leia spent all evening on the beach making sand castles, running along the shore and didn't even think of arguing who's gonna take the biggest room.

Leia'd seen the 'Frozen' movie for the first time recently during the sleepover at her bestie's house and now was singing all the songs from 'Let It Go' to 'Do You Want To Build a Snowman', slowly getting on Wyatt's nerves. Though today Wyatt didn't even care – she let her sister call her 'Elsa' (Leia associated herself with Anna), and now they were both sitting on the stairs of the patio, tired from running on the beach and happy with their new home location.

'Here you go,' Leonard brought a blanket from the car and wrapped up both girls hugging them from their backs. They giggled making him smile unintentionally. 'So, what do you think?' He sat next to them and gave them a curious look, although judging by their content faces he already knew the answer.

'I love it!' Leia exclaimed, emotional as always. 'Can we move today? Can we, daddy? Pretty please!' She looked at him with those big pleading eyes, which he usually couldn't resist, but this time it didn't depend solely on his decision, so he shook his head.

'No, princess, we still have to make lots of renovations here, so we have to wait for about four to five months.'

'Is it gonna happen faster than our birthday?' Leia wondered.

'Yeah, your birthday is nine months from now,' Leonard chuckled. 'So, first we're gonna celebrate Halloween, then mommy's birthday, then Thanksgiving in New Jersey and Christmas in Nebraska, then we move here, then there's gonna be my birthday and only then yours.'

Penny saw this cute picture coming through the door that lead from the living room to the patio. She was holding a coaster with four cups from the local coffeeshop, since they hadn't finished with the kitchen renovations yet. She froze for a few seconds looking at Leonard explaining something to their daughters, felt warmer than she was before (even though she'd already tried her coconut milk latte, and it was extremely hot) and came closer to the three of them.

'Hey, who's in the mood for some hot chocolate?' She immediately heard 'yay!' from both Leia and Wyatt. Leonard got up and helped her with all the cups checking them, so the girls wouldn't end up with his bitter black coffee instead of their favorite drink. Then four of them made themselves comfortable on the stairs and shared the blanket from the car. Leia climbed on Penny's lap, while Wyatt snuggled to Leonard, and they were sitting together quietly laughing at something silly, looking at the ocean and feeling as if they were the only people on this planet. And it felt good.

But in a few days it all went downhill. It was a quiet evening at home, Leonard was helping Leia with her Lego Castle for Princesses and at the same time was explaining to Wyatt something about time and space. She was listening very attentively, as usual fascinated with the new facts about the Universe. Penny was preparing dinner, thankful that Leonard could handle both of the girls at the same time, even though their favorite evening activities were extremely different.

By the time the Lego Castle was only missing its occupants, Wyatt got herself a bunch of new fun facts about our continuum and the shrimp pasta was on its way to the dining table located by the window in the living room, somebody knocked on the door.

'Is there anyone we've been waiting for?..' Leonard looked at Penny, who put the dish with pasta on the table and shrugged. Leonard stood up, opened the door and before he was even able to step away he was almost swept off his feet by a very familiar chestnut haired boy, who rushed into the apartment as if he was running a marathon or something.

'Mike!' Leia exclaimed happily, seeing her best friend in the living room, jumped to her feet and ran up to him to give him a hug. 'Hiiii!' It looked as if they haven't seen each other for a long time, even though they went roller skating with Penny just yesterday.

Those two were usually called 'troublemakers', but they preferred to be named 'partners in crime' (Leia heard it in some procedural show that mommy'd been binge watching for a while now and thought it described her and Mikey's friendship perfectly). Mike was a handful – he loved to explore everything, loved to wreck stuff, prank his friends and couldn't sit still longer than ten minutes. But at the same time he was a kind, sweet and adorable seven-year-old. His abilities to make troubles increased when he was with Leia – her ideas plus his fearlessness equaled in a mix that no parents would be happy with. Penny was almost the only one who could handle both of them perfectly – she knew she was just like them when she was knee high, so she had her own ways to deal with their little 'crimes'. Bernadette was pretty good with them too, but for a different reason – the kids were a bit afraid of her, because she had her own punishment system.

'Good evening, uncle Leonard, aunt Penny, how you doing?' The second person to reach the door was Halley. As usual, she nodded politely, asked permission to come in, smiled at Wyatt, who hadn't looked up from her book since Mike's appearance on their threshold, and asked her brother strictly: 'Michael, did you say hello to uncle Leonard and aunt Penny?' Halley was a very well-behaved and very quiet girl. She was good at school, good at her piano lessons, good at helping Bernadette around the house. But she was a very private person – even her parents had a hard time trying to understand how she felt about this and that.

'Hello, uncle Leonard, auntie Penny!' Mike yelled and gave them a broad grin. 'Great to see you! Leia, try to catch me!' He exclaimed in one breath, and the next second they were running around the apartment giggling and screaming at each other.

'I'm so sorry for this,' Halley looked up at Leonard and Penny.

'Hey, it's fine,' Penny chuckled and wondered: 'Are your parents parking or something?' She tried to remember if they scheduled a dinner together, but she was certain today in 4A supposed to be just the four of them.

'Mom is parking, yes,' Halley shrugged. 'Haven't seen dad since yesterday.'

Leonard raised his eyebrows. He was working in the lab the whole day and didn't have a chance to meet with the other guys today, so he had no idea where Howard was.

'He probably has a lot of work to do,' Penny said quickly casting her look at Leonard, who just shrugged in response. 'Are you hungry? Of course you are,' She answered herself immediately and directed Halley to the dining table. 'I'll catch Leia and Michael and we all have dinner together, alright?'

As soon as Bernadette appeared on the threshold, Penny knew something was wrong. She was holding a big duffel bag in one hand and Michael's favorite robot in the other. That was an ordinary set for a sleepover – sometimes Howard and Bernadette could leave Halley and Michael for the weekend at the Hofstadter's household, sometimes Penny and Leonard could ask them in return to babysit the girls. But both of the couples always gave a warning at least a week ahead, they had never left kids at each other houses spontaneously.

'Bernie, is everything alright?' Penny bit her lip, afraid to hear the answer.

'Can we talk outside?' Bernadette pointed at the hall, and Penny nodded quickly. She looked at the dining table and saw Leonard successfully handling not just two, but four kids already. Leia and Mike were quickly eating their portions and exchanging cunning looks every three seconds (they were definitely planning something), Halley was picking at the shrimp in her plate, while Wyatt was still reading and at the same time chewing little pieces of food that dad was cutting for her. Leonard was carefully watching Leia and Mike so they'd stick to the speed limit and wouldn't choke over their food; talking to Halley to cheer her up a little bit (she actually smiled one time, and not out of courtesy!); and feeding Wyatt, since she had her head in the clouds as usual. Penny observed that for just a few seconds, thought how lucky she was – unintentionally – and smiled broadly, until she saw her best friend's face. Then smile faded immediately, and Penny put her hand over her mouth.

They came out of the apartment, and Bernadette sighed, 'Penny, can you and Leonard take Halley and Mike for a few days, please?'

Few days could be two, four or even seven. Not a good sign. You don't say 'few days', when you know the exact number (or when you know, but this number is too big, which is even worse). But Penny nodded immediately, 'Sure, sweetie, they can stay here as long as you need!' She saw Bernadette's thankful smile and asked carefully, 'Are you… okay?'

'Yeah, yeah, yeah,' Bernadette said too fast and too loud. 'I mean… there've been better times, but I'll figure this out,' Penny could feel her bestie being on the verge of tears, but she knew Bernadette hated pity, so she stood still not trying to hug her.

'Well… If you need anything, you know that we are here for you, right?' Penny touched her by the shoulder, and Bernadette nodded. 'Seriously, anytime, anything, any crazy idea.'

'Thanks, Penny, but you're giving the biggest help watching over the kids,' Bernadette shook her head. 'I know, four kids under the same roof is a lot to ask…'

'Don't even start, we'll be fine, the kids hadn't had a sleepover for a while now, they'll be very happy,' Penny waved aside. She wanted to calm Bernadette, but deep down inside knew it's gonna be a hell of a ride – four kids under the same roof is tough, but when two of them are tremendous troublemakers, one cherish her privacy, and the other one doesn't talk about her feelings at all – well, their little apartment will probably turn into a mental institution. For a few days. Two, four, seven – at this point, it didn't even matter.

Put them down to sleep was almost an impossible mission, since Leia and Mike were too excited to play together and refused to go to bed, even though tomorrow was a school day. Halley, who usually obeyed anything a grown-up'd tell her, was apparently very nervous not knowing why mom had to leave them at the Hofstadter's, so she tried to reach her on the phone, but didn't succeed, and it made her a hundred times more nervous. Wyatt was the only one who didn't cause any troubles tonight, since the new book made her sleepy, and she sank into a deep sleep as soon as her head touched the pillow.

'One down, three to go,' Leonard mumbled, tucking Wyatt in. Penny kissed her on the forehead and brushed her blonde hair a little, before leaving the girls room. 'Okay…' They stood at the threshold of the living room, observing the three wide-awake kids. 'Who is next?'

'I think, Leia and Mike should be easier,' Penny said thoughtfully. 'They've been running around the apartment the whole evening, they'll probably fall asleep in half an hour.'

'I think, Halley is ten times easier,' Leonard argued.

'Wanna bet?' Penny chuckled. 'If I put Leia and Mike down for sleep faster than you calm Halley, you'll wake everyone up tomorrow morning and make breakfast. If I fail, I'll do that.' She said, deep down inside sure she's going to win.

Leonard sniffed, 'Prepare to wake up at six in the morning tomorrow.'

'I like it when you feel cocky,' Penny winked at him. 'Too bad you'll be disappointed.'

Leonard just laughed. Two active kids versus one obedient and calm – that was an easy equation. He came closer to Halley, who occupied Sheldon's spot on the couch, keep holding her phone.

'Halley, it's late, how about we turn everything down and go to sleep?' Leonard wondered looking down at the girl. Even though they've been babysitting her since she was born, they were still learning to understand her. It was hard.

Halley sighed, 'Mom's not answering.'

'She's probably asleep already,' Leonard said.

'She always texts us goodnight, if we're here,' Halley snapped out. 'I'm not going to sleep until she answers. What if something happened? What if dad's in trouble?' She looked up at Leonard. 'Do you know, where my dad is?'

'Well…' Leonard trailed off. He hated lying to kids, but sometimes it was necessary. Some things were just too hard to explain, he was afraid to turn their brain with adult conversations. Right now it was easier with Leia – she still believed in Santa Claus, wasn't really interested in stuff like where the kids come from, and was okay with Leonard's explanation of death. Wyatt was reading a lot, not Stephen Hawking's essays about black holes and parallel universes yet, but not fairytales already. So she had tons of questions every evening, and Leonard was extremely careful with her trying to avoid controversial subjects, so she wouldn't focus on grown-up's problems at her age. And Halley… well, she was something else. 'Have you tried to call him?'

Halley mumbled, 'Yes, of course.'

'Okay, how about uncle Raj, did you call him?'

Halley's face lightened, 'No!'

'Okay then, let's call him,' Leonard swallowed knowing it's gonna be another white lie, but what else could he do. He dialed Raj's number and waited a few tones before he heard his voice.

'Leonard? Everything's alright?'

'Yeah, yeah, I just wanted to ask, maybe you know where Howard is?' Leonard asked turning down the volume of his phone at the same time, so Halley won't hear the answer.

'How would I know?' Raj answered quickly. 'Why do you think I would know that?'

That was suspicious, but Leonard was concentrated on his white lie, so he just said: 'Okay, thank you, Raj.' He hanged up the phone and smiled towards Halley. 'See, everything is okay, your dad is at uncle Raj's apartment, and he is sleeping already, he had a lot of work to do.'

Halley sighed with relief and then frowned, 'But why didn't he come home? And why mom left us here?'

'You know what…' Leonard sat next to her. 'Sometimes parents get tired too, and they need a few days to be alone. It happens. Sometimes they even need to be apart from each other.'

'Do you get tired from auntie Penny?' Halley wondered.

'Sure,' Leonard shrugged. 'Nor right now, but…'

'Set an alarm, Hofstadter!' Penny appeared on the threshold of the living room feeling extremely content with herself. 'Leia is already in bed and Michael is brushing his teeth.' She grinned watching her husband's face.

'What, how did you…' Leonard looked at his watch. 'How did you do that?!'

'That's a secret I'll never tell,' Penny sticked her tongue out.

'MOOOM!' They heard Leia's voice from the girls' room. 'Can I please have hot chocolate and cookies instead of milk and cookies? I swear, I won't tell dad!'

Penny sighed, catching Leonard's ironic glance.

'I want hot chocolate too!' Mike's head popped out of the bathroom door. 'And maybe an ice cream instead of cookies?'

'Stop it, I wanna sleep!' Their screams woke up Wyatt and she was not in a good mood.

'You know what they say, bribery is punishable,' Leonard chuckled giving a light smack on Penny's shoulder. Penny rolled her eyes and sighed. It's gonna be a long, long week.

The next day Leonard woke up even before the alarm went off feeling a strong kick on his leg. He opened his eyes yawning and stretching out, turned to his left and saw Wyatt – in her favorite pajamas with yellow stars that glow in the dark – peacefully sleeping next to him. She had a habit to enter the parents bedroom whenever she was scared or tired of Leia's rambling and quietly climb on their bed so they won't wake up. She didn't consider one thing – she was kicking in her sleep and that used to wake her parents up more efficiently than any alarm in the world.

Leonard sighed getting out of bed, carefully moving Wyatt so she wouldn't wake up Penny the same way she pulled him out of his dreams. He then switched Penny's alarm, which she had set yesterday grumbling and sighing heavily. When he came out of the bedroom, he found Leia sitting on the floor in the living room playing with her favorite Baby Born doll. Leia loved babies – on the playgrounds she always ran to the sandpits to meet new little kids on the block and greet the ones she already knew.

'Morning, daddy!' Leia said cheerfully, filling up the bottle for her doll.

'Morning, princess,' Leonard smiled, kissing her on the forehead and helping her with the formula for the doll. 'Here you go,' He handled her the bottle back and wondered, 'When did you wake up?'

'Just now,' Leia said putting the bottle to the doll's mouth and starting to feed it. 'I'm hungry,' She added.

'Fifteen minutes, and the waffles will be done,' Leonard reported getting all the required ingredients from the fridge. 'Have you brushed your teeth already?'

'Nope, had to feed Ally,' Leia nodded at her doll.

Leonard chuckled softly, 'Alright, but after the feeding, please, brush your teeth.'

'Yes, daddy,' Leia woke up in a good mood today, because usually she hated brushing her teeth and didn't agree that easily. When Ally was full, Leia put her on the couch, climbed on one of the bar stools and cocked her head watching daddy making waffles.

'Teeth, Leia,' Leonard reminded gently.

'Just a moment!' Leia promised. 'I wanted to ask you something.'

'Sure, you can ask me anything,' Leonard glanced over to his daughter. 'What's bothering you?'

'I want a sister,' Leia said simply.

Leonard raised his eyebrows, 'Well, you already have a sister.'

'A little sister.'

Leonard sighed. He knew this conversation would happen one day, but still tried to trick her, 'Wyatt is technically your little sister – she is six minutes younger.'

Leia pouted, 'Daddy!' She crossed her arms and repeated slowly, 'I. Want. A. Sister.'

'I heard you,' Leonard looked at her strictly and saw her frowning – not a good sign for sure. She'll probably start crying the minute he tells her no. 'You know, if you do have a little sibling one day, it's not guaranteed it will be a sister. Maybe you'll have a little brother, and then what?'

Leia shrugged, 'I know, but I guess it's okay, if he's like Mikey.'

'But what if he's not?'

'We'll raise him right, I'll help him to be cool,' Leia promised. Leonard laughed. 'Is that a yes?' She brightened up.

'No, sweetie, look it's a complicated topic… Raising kids is a lot of work. Not everyone is ready even for one kid, and three… That's a lot.'

'My friend Alisha has three brothers,' Leia said, her voice trembling a little. 'So, there are four of them.'

'Well, yes, but your friend Sienna doesn't have any siblings. Mike has one sister, just like you. All families are different, that's how life works.' Leonard opened the wafer maker and looked at Leia again. 'Now go brush your teeth, okay?'

'I'll ask mommy about this,' Leia ran to the couch, cuddled Ally the doll and went to the bathroom with her, probably to give her a bath while brushing teeth (otherwise tooth cleaning was just a dull occupation). Leonard sighed watching her go. Having kids was hard but rewarding. Well, at least for him. They had one crazy full house with twins, but last night, when they were putting to bed four kids instead of two, Leonard thought he wouldn't mind a fuller house. It was a quick thought, he forgot about it the moment his head touched the pillow, but today Leia reminded him of that again.

'Why didn't you wake me?' Penny was standing on the threshold of the living room, her messy blonde hair rippled over her shoulders, pink robe wrapped in a hurry. She smiled picking up the smell of freshly cooked waffles and hugged Leonard from the back. 'Thanks,' She whispered in his neck, her breath tickling his skin softly. Leonard turned putting his arms around her waist. They stand like that for awhile, until Leia came out of the bathroom, Ally the doll swaddled in a big white towel in her arms. She sat on the bar stool and started eating waffles, while her parents discussed their plans for today. They had to take the kids from two different schools during their lunch hour and drive them to four different activities – it was Friday, so Halley had piano lessons, Mike attended karate lessons which he wasn't fond of, Leia had another rehearsal at the drama class, and Wyatt couldn't wait for a new discussion at the kids' science club. Then both of them had to finish work earlier than usual to take kids some place else – Penny suggested the local mall, where they could visit an indoor amusement park, watch the new 'Toy Story' (that's two hours of silence!) and finish the day with a dinner, since there were a few good restaurants there.

Penny thought the kids'd be exhausted after an hour in amusement park, because all of them – Wyatt included! – tried every possible ride in this mall. But it seemed as if they only gained energy from that activity, Leia and Mike even threw themselves a competition which they called 'who is the higher jumper'. No need to say that both of them eventually found themselves on the ground – one's sobbing, the other one trying to sing Soft Kitty to calm her best friend down. Leonard sighed with a relief when they made it to the theatre – Mike's with extra portion of his favorite ice cream which reconciled him with reality much better than Leia's singing.

The movie was great, at least for five of them (Penny fell asleep during the commercials and later thanked Leonard for not waking her up, because RAM sleep was more important for her than the adventures of Woody and his pals).

'Mommy, look, my shirt!' Leia exclaimed when they were heading to the restaurant. Penny looked down at her daughter and couldn't help but laugh. Leia's white shirt was covered in her favorite chocolate ice cream – normal thing for this kid, to be honest. They were so used to Leia's sloppy manner that couldn't be mad at this.

'How did you manage to get so dirty?' Penny tried to make a straight face, but was failing.

'I dunno… it was dark in there,' Leia made a helpless gesture with her hands. 'Can I change?'

'Yeah, but I don't have a spare shirt in my bag for you,' Penny chuckled and took her by the hand. 'You know what, Leonard, you guys go and order, because I'm starving, and we'll make a dive into the first kid's store we come across and return, okay?'

The curse for every parent was the fact that almost every shop with kid's clothes also had a few rows with toys and other accessories that a child'd forget about forty minutes after the purchase. Penny sighed watching the kids around – a girl who was on the verge of tears because she obviously needed that stuffed dolphin, a boy bursted out crying, realizing that today was not his day and a game he'd set his heart on would stay on the shelf. Before Penny knew, Leia was already in the section with clothes for Baby Born dolls. She already forgot about her own shirt, now concentrating on the tiny dresses and onesies for Ally the doll.

Penny was about to remind her daughter the purpose of their little trip here, but looked down and saw her own haul – four shirts (two fluorescent ones for Wyatt, two pastel ones for Leia), couple of dresses for the girls and even a cute t-shirt with a skateboard for Michael. Penny chuckled under her breath: she knew exactly where Leia's addiction to shopping came from. So instead of arguing she wondered, coming closer to her daughter, 'Got everything you needed, baby?'

'Yep!' Leia looked up at her mom, her eyes shone with excitement. 'Look, this is such a cool dress with a duck, and I got one with a Mickey Mouse, and… Oh! Look at those Nikies!' Leia squealed showing Penny teeny-tiny Nike shoes.

Penny laughed softly, 'No, sweetie, these are from new born section, not Baby Born,' She took the shoes from Leia. 'They're not for dolls, too big for them.'

'Oh… alright then,' Leia shrugged. 'Guess we'll never need them.'

Penny frowned, 'What's that supposed to mean?'

Leia kept shifting from one foot to another, for some reason feeling extremely nervous, 'Daddy said three kids is a lot. I said, Alisha has three brothers, but he said all families are different –'

'Wait, what?' Penny interrupted her. 'Can you, please, slow down?' Her heart skipped a beat for some reason, she was holding those tiny shoes, trying to catch a strange thought that flittered across her brain yesterday. The moment she observed Leonard helping kids with the dinner (almost got it! wait, Bernie needs to talk); the moment she saw him calming Halley down (aww… wait, I promised Leia and Mike milk and cookies for their good behavior); the moment they both were half asleep, and he was hugging her from the back as usual, but she felt an urge to say something important, something that made her both nervous and excited (but she was so tired she fell asleep the second after almost catching that thought).

Now she finally caught it, in the middle of the store, with her daughter, who tried to explain what she meant. It was a thought that included a memory from their night in Stockholm after the Nobel reception, a fear that never left her heart, and an extremely warm inexplicable feeling inside.

After the official ceremony there was a big reception with a bunch of old and new laureates and their guests. Leonard felt great making new connections with physicists from other countries, telling them about his own research and listening about theirs. He kinda melted into the crowd and for a moment forgot about his friends, until someone stroked him gently by the shoulder. He turned back and saw his wife, smiling a bit guiltily.

'I'm gonna call it a night, but you stay here as long as you want, okay, sweetie?' Penny saw his happy face immediately changing.

'Is everything alright?' Leonard asked anxiously.

'Yeah, don't worry, I'm great, just really tired, wanna trade this dress for my comfortable pajamas,' Penny said placing her hand on her stomach. 'Bernie and Amy are going with me, maybe we'll have a quiet girls' night: Nobel Prize winning version.'

Leonard laughed and quickly kissed her, 'Okay then. But if you need anything, just call me.'

'I'll probably call room service, but fine,' Penny chuckled and waved goodbye.

They did call room service to order wine and fruits for Amy and Bernadette and two portions of meatballs that Penny was craving for.

'Too bad we have to fly back tomorrow already,' Bernadette sighed finishing her third glass of wine.

'And just a few hours ago you were ready to leave everything behind and return home,' Amy chuckled looking at her ironically.

'Hey, don't judge me until you leave your kids on the other continent for the first time,' Bernadette answered angrily. 'It's harder than you may think. Sure, my parents raised five children, they are able to take good care of Halley and Michael… But I'll still be worried about them no matter what. That's just how motherhood works.'

Penny sighed.

'You alright there, bestie?' Amy asked.

'Yeah,' Penny bit her bottom lip and fell silent. That was the scariest part for her, the reason she was afraid to finally start a family. The fact that she couldn't protect them forever, and if something happened with them, she wouldn't be able to handle that.

It hit her hard when Leonard started talking about kids. Deep down she knew she'd make a great mom. Hell, her maternal instincts probably kicked in when she met Sheldon and tried her best to help him go through different social situations. She felt responsible for him, she actually loved singing him Soft Kitty when he was sick, and yes – she was scared something terrible'd happen to him. But it wasn't that bad. She knew if she had her own kids, she wouldn't be able to control her feelings, like she did with Sheldon. Stupid hormones or the maternal instinct or that thing people called 'unconditional love'. Stupid, stupid, stupid. She was living with one desperate, heart-wrenching thought.

What if they die.

It was dark, maybe abnormal (she didn't really know… were all parents like that?), but she was thinking about it way before she got pregnant. When Leonard stormed off yelling 'I'm fine!' after their stupid conversation about kids, she wanted to go after him, tell him about all her fears, say 'Okay, let's do this, I actually want to be a mom…', but there was one thought that stopped her.

What. If. They. Die.

She knew exactly what Leonard'd say. 'Statistically it's highly unlikely. Parents usually die way before their children. I promise, everything is gonna be alright.' Yeah. But he couldn't be 100% sure. You don't promise when you're not sure. You just don't, Leonard!

She thought about it again after their quiet version of girls' night (although, to be honest, it stopped being quiet after Bernie's fourth glass of wine and Amy's second). She wanted to tell Leonard about all her fears so bad, but somehow she just couldn't. Maybe thought it'd make them sound even more stupid after actually saying them out loud.

Leonard returned around midnight and found his wife at her 'favorite' spot – sitting on the bathroom floor, but this time in her pink striped pajamas. He immediately grabbed a towel and sank right besides her, starting to rub her back and passing his fingers over her tangled hair.

'She hates every food I tried, Leonard,' Penny was on the verge of tears. 'I can't do this anymore, it's exhausting, I just wanna go back to bed.' She sobbed feeling pity for herself. Leonard cuddled his wife and kissed her on the forehead.

'I know, honey, and I am so sorry about this. But hey, only four more weeks till your first trimester is over,' He tried to cheer her up, but judging by the look on her face it didn't work.

'Why can't she just go to sleep, like all normal babies after midnight?' Penny whined. Leonard's heart skipped a beat. When he first heard Penny referring to the baby as 'she' he thought maybe she misspoke, but there it was, the second time. Until today Penny was trying to avoid referring to the baby in any way, and Leonard was patiently waiting for her to start doing it, he didn't want to push her, although he'd already come up with a few cool nicknames and was talking to the baby during Penny's naps.

'I don't think that's how it works with nausea…' Leonard couldn't help himself but chuckled and got another you-are-dead-Hofstadter look from his wife. 'But I'm sure she doesn't mean bad.'

Penny bit her lip.

'Oh, you caught that, didn't you?'

'Yeah,' Leonard grinned.

Penny smiled softly, casting her look.

'I mean, I'm gonna be happy either way. But I kinda always wanted to have a daughter.'

Leonard smiled back at her placing his hand on her stomach.

'I kinda did too.'

'Mommy!' Leia interrupted her thoughts unintentionally. 'I'm hungry!'

'Yeah, of course,' Penny felt as if she suddenly woke up from a deep sleep and took Leia by the hand, directing her to the cashdesk. 'Let's go, sweetie.' It's been a long journey, from the moment she finally admitted that fear to herself in Stockholm to her actually being able to stand the fact that she couldn't control everything in her daughters' lives. Yes, it was hard, and in her darkest hours she wanted to freeze the time, change the past, never ever start that journey again. But they managed to go through it – both of them. Penny was never alone with her fears since the day she'd told Leonard everything. And now she couldn't imagine herself without these two very different, but equally smart and beautiful girls.

And she also knew – standing at the cashdesk, holding teeny-tiny Nike shoes, her heart beating way faster than it should – she could do it all over again.

'Are you buying those?' The cashier glanced at the shoes.

Penny slowly put them on the desk and nodded. 'Yeah, I am.'