Save Muggleborns from Idiotic Tyrannical Enormous Muggles

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Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter in any way, shape, or form,

Summary: One day after seeing Harry's living conditions, Draco gets the well meaning idea to save his classmates from living in the muggle world. Someone should really stop Draco when he's feeling altruistic.

-Sorry about any spelling or grammatical errors, I'm trying my best-

Harry's House

"Potter, I see no reason why I have to walk your incompetent sixteen year old ass back home. What am I child services?" Draco stepped up on the doorstep.

Harry followed the blonde none too happy with the situation.

"Malfoy if it were within any scope of my power, you would not be here. You definitely wouldn't be coming inside, and you surely wouldn't be staying the night."

"What Potter, afraid when your muggles see what a real wizard can do they'll dump you out on the street. Now summon them to the door. The faster this is over the faster I can seek professional Oblivation." Harry sighed shaking his head and rung the doorbell.

Draco watch as an obviously irate man with beaty eyes peered through a crack in the door. He looked Potter over then dragged them both inside. Once the door was closed again the fat man faced them and started ranting. "Boy what have I told you about coming to the front door. You go through the back. I won't have the neighbors seeing you, that owl, and..." he noticed Draco for the first time and shook more. "What is that?"

Harry stopped him just as Draco went to tell Vernon off in all his silvery haired Malfoy robed glory. "I will. Draco just isn't used to climbing over fences and I didn't think you wanted him alone at the front door in robes... odd clothing" He made sure not to make eye contact. "There was a problem at the train station, he just has to stay the night, he'll be gone before breakfast."

Vernon looked the blonde wizard up and down. "Can't even have a normal name. I'm not calling it that. You keep it in your room till dinner then you feed it upstairs and then send it away tomorrow. You understand!"

"Come on Malfoy." Harry whispered grabbing Draco by the arm and dragging him towards the stairs. "Don't say anything just move." He pleaded.

Harry could see smoke raising from Draco's ears as he shut the bedroom door behind him. "It! It! That fat sub-squib wants me incarcerated in this shabby excuse for a beat up shack and he thinks I'll stay in this," he spun around taking in the new bars, "barely furnished prison cell. I refuse." He turned to Harry. "I'm staying in your room Potter. You're the golden boy hero after all. It has to be much better than this" he shook his arms, "muggle garbage heap."

"Malfoy." Harry just hoped he didn't shout any louder.

"What Potter?"

"This is my room Malfoy. "

"That's impossible."

"You don't believe me? The one next door in my cousin Dudley's. It's full of muggle technology and...him. This is were I sleep, it's a step up from before, be happy Vernon didn't have us go to the... never mind."

"The what?"

"It's not important." Harry tried to recover from his slip. "Dinner won't be for at least two more hours. " He pulled a book from his pack. "I'm studying till then, do what you want."

"Studying a hour into break. Planning to become Granger are you? Going to start raising your hand franticly and asking unnecessary questions next?"

Harry took out two more books. "I just want to get some stuff done while there's still time."

"Still time?" Draco stared at him hard. "What aren't you telling me?"

"Nothing. Whatever you do just make sure you're quite."

"You can't tell me what to..."

"BOY." Uncle Vernon's bellow came through the closed door. "Get down here. You're earning your keep. Make dinner and leave the other one up there. Lock the door behind you."

"Earn you keep, dinner? You're not his house elf. He can't make you do anything. Wait, what does he mean lock the door behind you, I'm still in here."

"Draco, just study or something. I'll bring you some food when it's ready. Believe me ' the locks are for you own protection'." He said it like he was quoting it. "Just don't make too much noise."

Harry stopped him before he could object with a quiet voice. "No really Draco just don't make too much noise." and he heard the sound of locks snapping into place.

Draco was snapped out of his quidditch magazines by a reasonable pleasant smell of meat cooking and a loud crash. He heard voices muffled at first then louder. "WHAT DID I TELL YOU ABOUT WATCHING THE STOVE. " followed by several hard to describe thuds and silence. He was just getting through a live action replay on page 18 when the door crashed open. The Muggle was back with Potter by the collar of a huge ratty shirt and with no dinner. "You boy stay in here till we're finished eating. You upset Petunia." Vernon looked over "And you..." He trailed off as he saw the wizarding magazines Draco had laid out.

"No." He picked up a magazine like it was poisonous. "I will not have you looking at those in my home." He looked frantic. "Leave them." He grabbed Draco's sleeve by the other hand.

"Get your hands off me!" Draco growled.

Vernon let go of Harry as he opened the cupboard door and pushed them both in. "You keep it from doing anymore abnormalities. If I hear anything I'm throwing you both in the tool shed boy. " The door slammed shut and Draco swore he head five locks thrown. He watched as Potter sighed and calmly reached for the light pull. "Congratulations Draco, we'll be lucky if we get any food now." Draco was about to comment when he got his first good look at Harry's face. "What happened to you Potter?"

"Waffle iron...don't ask."