Chapter 1 - To The Victor Go the Spoils

"Ten…."

Monkey D. Luffy had a big dream, albeit a simple one: to be Pirate King, find One Piece, and be the freest person on the seas. His travels started in the humble East Blue, where he met his first four crewmates.

"Nine…."

Having acquired a sizable bounty of 30 million beli, he and his crew set off into the Grand Line, a perilous place crawling with adventure and mystery, just the way he liked it. Early into the journey his crew became the targets of one of the Seven Warlords, Sir Crocodile.

"Eight….."

Through determination and will, he saved Alabasta and defeated Crocodile, earning the 100 million beli that prized his head today. Two other crewmates had joined along the way, and a tearful goodbye to Princess Vivi was the end.

"Seven….."

Luffy's next adventure took him to Sky Island, where the crew had the experience of a lifetime! Clouds, dials, people with wings, a city of gold, a bell, and a lightning-shooting God named Eneru that almost destroyed all of Skypiea. Thankfully, rubber beats lightning.

"Six….!"

And now, he was at the next island, in a high stakes pirate game to win it all and lose big. It was a difficult battle but not something he couldn't ultimately handle. Battered and bruised, Luffy watched the effects of his opponent's power bounce at him: Foxy the Silver Fox and his Slow-Slow Fruit.

"Come on now, everyone cheer! Five!"

Foxy had many tricks up his sleeve and settled for every cheap shot he could get, but he could only moan in slow motion as the force of Gum-Gum Flail was beginning to sink in and contort his face.

"Four!"

Perhaps Usopp's claim that the afro made his punch stronger really worked?

"Three!"

The Davy Back Fight took Chopper in the first round, but Zoro and Sanji got him back in round 2. If Luffy was going to win the third round, who would he take?

"Two!"

Of course, Luffy wasn't considering this now. He was waiting for his win, and maybe wondering when Sanji was going to cook him up some meat. Splithead had hurt him enough.

"One!"

He wasn't going to lose any crewmate.

"ZERO!"

Foxy flew out of the ring.

After the battle, Chopper patched up Luffy on the grass, along with the facilitator of the competition - Tonjit's horse Shelly. The old man was very grateful for the outcome.

"No big deal. I got to punch Splithead, so she was avenged."

"Could always sneak him the gun and have him hunt the fox," Zoro suggested with a grin. He dropped it at Chopper's obvious disapproval for that idea. "It was just a joke, Luffy already punched him enough."

"So what now?" Usopp looked over at the Sexy Foxy. "Does this mean we pick someone for our crew?"

"We?! Nonsense!"

Itomimizu was still the announcer and the game had one last step, after all. He and his bird loomed over the Straw Hats as the defeated Foxy walked over, also patched up.

"The Captain and Captain alone gets to make the call! Who will Straw Hat Luffy choose?!"

"Like it even matters, they're all a bunch of cheating stooges!" Nami complained.

"OH! The Navigator's tongue is as biting as ever!"

"SHUT UP!"

Robin looked at the desperate pirate gaggle. "They seem to be dreading whatever choice you make, Captain. Maybe we should pick someone of use to the ship. Didn't we need a carpenter?"

"Y-Yeah! The Going Merry had its days of wear and tear…." Usopp looked protectively over at their ship. "And we just came from the sky!"

"Well you're in luck! The Foxy Pirates has its fair share of carpenter choices! Will it be Gina, the sexy carpenter?"

Said woman winked flirtatiously over at her would-be new captain, but it was a wasted gesture. Instead Luffy casually stuck his finger up his nose and looked at the prospective choice. She recoiled slightly. In his ear Sanji was begging him to choose her.

"Or maybe the carpenter that can also fight, Donovan?"

Sanji was less thrilled for that choice. Disappointed, even.

"Orrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr Sonie, the head of all 50 Foxy Pirate ship carpenters?"

"What?! Fifty?" Chopper gasped.

"It makes sense. Their ship is quite large, and to accommodate such a growing number of pirates they would need all the help they could get. Splithead has an eye for talent."

Rather than be joyed at Robin's pseudo-compliment, Foxy sulked at the familiar, cruel insult. Luffy switched finger and nostril.

"Oh! Is Straw Hat Luffy on the verge of a decision?"

Luffy watched the growing panic on most of the crew. It seems for all his tricks, they had gotten used to their place among the fox. Why else would everyone wear matching masks? So he looked to their ship. It was a darn good ship. How many parties could they have on that?

"Just pick, Straw Hat!" Foxy shouted. "I can see it your eyes….you want me, don't you?!"

"No! Not you, boss!"

"I knew it! It really is a sin to be this beautiful AND have a winning personality! So long, everyone! When I'm gone, be sure to read about my piratey deeds in the papers!"

"Boss, no!" Porche squealed. "Anyone but you!"

"It's okay, crew! We gave it our all!" Foxy cried out. "But a win is a win, and that winNER is Luffy!" The fox grinned. "He beat me. I know, I know….I'm not as invincible as I make it seem-"

"You gonna join me or not?"

"?!"

"!"

"WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT?!"

"T-This can't be! Luffy has really chosen…..!"

Foxy stared at Luffy. He wasn't expecting him to seriously do it! All the crewmates and fame he had gotten, now he had to start over?! But he was a man of the sea, and accepted his fate.

"You can't be serious Luffy!" Nami hissed behind him. But what her rubbery captain did next was even more unexpected. Yes, when Foxy got closer, Luffy pointed at the rest of his crew.

"C'mon. They're coming with us."

"WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT?!"

"Oh…..my…..GOODNESS! THIS WAS NOT THE ENDING I WAS EXPECTING!"

"What are you saying, Straw Hat?!" Foxy had to make sure he heard this idiot right. "You're choosing me….but roping the rest of the Foxy Pirates into this?!" Of course, the irony of him doing that to the Fang-Frog pirates was completely lost on him.

"You're a big cheater, Splithead, but you sure are a pirate. You should sail with all of your crewmates, and that's now us. Those guys gotta ditch the masks, though."

"No…..way…..!"

"LUFFY! I'M GOING TO KILL YOU!" Nami readied her fist just as Usopp, Chopper, Zoro, and Sanji stood there with the most dumbstruck look on their face. Their historian merely giggled. "WHAT'S SO FUNNY, ROBIN?!"

"Isn't the Captain filled with surprises?"

To be continued?

This was sparked by a passing thought and me recently rereading the series. I can't say when this will get updated but all I know is it's high time I write something for One Piece. The last time I wrote for it, it was a half-baked crossover with Dragon Ball and really wasn't the zenith of my creativity.

Here? No Foxy search tag, and only 15 stories come up with his name in the description. So we'll see, hmm?