A/N: My computer has finally been fixed! I'm so sorry for the delay. This chapter will jump around a bit, but the next will tie things together. The next chapter will also have a pretty deep conversation between both Christian and Anastasia!

Stay well friends!

Christian tapped his foot impatiently as he watched the couples moving on the dance floor. The rage that filled him was continuing to grow as he also watched Anastasia chatting with Jose Rodriguez.

He remembered him from high school; he had been a shorter teenager and hadn't exactly grown into himself. Now, on the other hand, Jose was tall and muscular and in Christian's eyes, was a threat.

He watched as Jose had hugged her and watched as she returned the hug. He watched as Jose said something and watched as Anastasia giggled in return. His foot continued to tap, but he stood immediately when he saw Jose hand her a card with what he assumed was his number on it.

Christian turned what was about thirty steps into fifteen and found himself next to Anastasia once more, his hand coming to rest on her lower back. She turned her head in surprise, shivering against his touch.

"Oh, Christian! I'm so sorry this took so long; I was just about to come find you again." She cleared her throat, "Christian, this is Jose, you -"

"Went to the same high school." Christian finished shortly. "Hello Jose. Ana, a word?"

Before Jose could respond, Christian used his hand on Anastasia's back to guide her away.

"Christian! What the hell was that about?" Ana asked, embarrassment flooding her features. The interaction with Jose had been innocent enough, but she quickly reminded herself that it didn't matter. Christian had wanted space after all.

He guided her into a shadowed area, away from the crowd. They stood alone, although she could barely make out Taylor off in the distance. It was hard to see his features without the lighting of the tent, but she could make out his jaw ticking.

"Are you going to call him?" He asked quietly.

Was he... jealous?

Anastasia shifted uncomfortably, crossing her arms over her chest. "Probably not. Christian, I don't understand you. You've shunned me. You've pushed me away from you. And now you're upset because I talked to some other guy?"

"Your first kiss if I recall correctly."

"Yes." She vaguely noticed that he was moving closer to her.

Christian felt torn as he stared at the beautiful woman before him. He knew he was being selfish, and he knew he was giving her mixed signals. As a man who always felt control in his world, Anastasia confounded him and broke down his barriers that for so many years he had put up. He felt jealous, a feeling that had been unbeknownst to him until recently. She had made him feel that and with a sudden moment of realization, he realized that Anastasia made him feel.

He knew he shouldn't have done it, but he stepped closer to her and raised his hand to brush his thumb against her cheek. She shivered at the touch but pressed her face into his hand. The simple movement made his heart skip a beat, and he knew in that moment he was lost to her.

"Christian," She whispered, but he didn't hear whatever else she was trying to say because his lips were on hers.

It had started as a tender kiss, their lips brushing lightly against one another's, but when Ana gripped at his arm, he couldn't help himself. Both hands raised to grab her face, and the moment her lips parted, his tongue dove in to stroke against hers. He held her close, before finally brushing his lips against hers one last time.

Her facial expression was that of surprise.

"Christian..." She repeated, "As much I enjoy kissing you... you are confusing the ever-loving hell out of me." Regardless, she leaned forward, her forehead resting on his.

"I know, I'm -"

"Oh! Looks like this corner is already taken!" He heard his sister suddenly say and tenderness of the moment was forgotten when Christian saw Ethan Kavanagh trying to sneak off with his sister.

Anastasia stared at her reflection in the mirror. She stood in the bathroom, having excused herself when she saw Christian about to go nuclear from finding Ethan and Mia together. She rolled her eyes at his mercurial behavior. He had kissed her, again, after telling her they needed space. Her confusion was obvious and as she stared at herself, she decided she would get answers from him.

"You're Anastasia Steele."

The soft voice spoke from the door and Ana jumped, having not heard the door open.

The woman that stood at the door looked vaguely familiar. She was slender and pale, with long brown hair that fell over her shoulders, her eyes a chestnut brown.

"Yes, and you are?" Ana responded and while the interaction seemed less than threatening, she had a feeling of unease in the pit of her stomach.

"It doesn't matter. I saw you with Mr. Grey."

The girl almost looked like she was going to cry.

"With Christian? I -"

"He lets you call him by his name?"

Ana paused, the interaction effectively freaking her out. Without another word, she excused herself from the bathroom. She quickly made her way back to the tent where she found Christian speaking in hushed tones to Taylor.

"Ana, I - are you okay?" Christian could see the change in her demeanor. Rather than relaxed, she looked tense, her arms crossed over her chest as if fighting off a chill.

"I just had a very odd interaction in the restroom... some girl recognized me by name and was surprised that I called you Christian..."

Though he could see the confusion her face, he immediately felt flushed and enraged.

Had a previous sub made their way into the event?! How?! Did they say anything else to her?!

"It was just... odd." She continued.

"I'm sure nothing to worry about." Christian said lightly, before they were interrupted by his parents.

"So, this is what you guys do after the event?" Anastasia asked.

"Every year." Elliot replied.

The family sat outside by a lit fire pit. Each had changed into their pajamas, including Ethan who was borrowing sweatpants and a t-shirt from Carrick. Along with giving him the clothes, Carrick had also made it clear that Ethan would be sleeping on the couch. Each had a varying drink in their hand, and they were all curled up in individual chairs.

"It's tradition. Grey family slumber party. We'll pop in a movie tonight; Gretchen is making popcorn and then in the morning we have a huge breakfast together!" Mia exclaimed and as usual was clothed in something pink and fluffy.

Christian sat staring into the flames of the fire, his foot tapping. Every year he had been forced into this slumber party, but this year he didn't mind. He had changed into pajama pants with an old Harvard t-shirt covering his chest. He heard them chattering around him, but his mind was stuck on the kiss he and Anastasia had shared hours before.

Once they had been interrupted, the night had gone on easily. The Grey's said their goodbyes to guests that had danced into the night, and while the cleaning crew began taking care of the aftermath of the event, they all began getting ready for their movie night. He had watched as Anastasia would shyly smile at him, obviously unsure of what direction they were now taking.

He was unsure himself.

"Christian! You good bro? We've been saying your name for like two minutes." Said Elliot, his eyebrow raised. He was standing with his arm already over Kate's shoulders. "Popcorn's done. Ready to go watch an action movie?"

"A romance movie, you mean." Mia interrupted.

"I'll be in shortly." Christian said, his eyes moving back to the fire.

It became quieter as they moved inside. He knew she was standing there; he could feel her presence.

"Christian, are you okay?" Anastasia asked.

He glanced upward at her, looking even more beautiful in a t-shirt and pajama pants, her hair still pinned up from the event.

"Yes, I'll be in in just a moment."

While alone, he could admit he wanted to be with her. He wanted to date her and do couple things together. His problem was that he was so inexperienced he had no idea where to begin. Christian felt himself once again weighted down by his experience with Elena and the guilt that followed. He knew that by being with Anastasia he'd have to explain his past to her, and after everything she had been through, would that be something she'd want to deal with?

Three Years Prior

"Christian," Dr. Flynn began in his British accent, "We've been talking for over a year now. What are you looking to gain from these conversations if you're not going to follow my advice?"

Christian frowned in defeat, walking back and forth in the office with his arms crossed over his chest. "I know John. But I... fuck, I can't tell them."

"Perhaps not now. But you will need to come to terms with what happened Christian and understand that it was wrong."

"But she helped me John-"

"Christian, she damaged you. And she would have continued damaging you if not for the fact that we've had these sessions. She molested you Christian, and until you see that and understand that you were a victim, then these sessions are moot." His voice was firm.

Victim. Christian scoffed at the word. He was one of the most powerful men in Seattle, not a victim.

A nagging voice in his head told him he was wrong.

"If it's not wrong Christian," Flynn said, "then why are you hiding it from your family?"

"You know damn well why!" But Christian knew the argument was lost, and Flynn could tell.

"Say it aloud Christian."

"Because I was having a sexual relationship with my mother's best friend."

Flynn waited.

"And it was wrong.."

Present Day

Even now, three years later, he felt the guilt nagging at him each time he saw his mother. Would she ever forgive him if he told her the truth? Probably not. He had carried on a sexual relationship with her best friend for years. She had introduced him to a world that he had loved, but it was a world of dominance and submission. She hadn't helped him to ever love but taught him to be feared.

The problem was that he didn't want to be feared by Anastasia. She had felt fear enough during his experience in Florida.

"Be the right thing for her!"

As the movie played, Christian was still nowhere to be found. Excusing herself, Ana stood and walked back outside to find him in the same chair he had been sitting in, still staring at the flames that were now reducing to embers.

"Christian?" She said softly as she pulled a chair next to him. "You don't want to watch the movie?"

"Which movie did they decide on?" Christian asked her.

"The Avengers. Mia wasn't happy." She laughed.

Christian joined her, "I'm sure she wasn't. But last year she made us watch The Notebook, so I'm sure she'll get over it." He paused and she watched as he shifted uncomfortably. "You know Ana, you are the one person in my life that has completely confounded me. I'm always used to get being in control, to getting my way. I didn't expect that when I found you in Florida to bring you home, you'd be the one person that would make me feel so spiraled out of control."

Anastasia said nothing. Was she doing that to him?

"I know I'm confusing you Ana. I'm confusing myself. You've been through so much and you've stayed so strong through it."

He reached out, intertwining his fingers with her own.

She spoke, "You're strong too Christian."

"I'm sorry for pushing you away Ana. I want... you. I want whatever this is. But, I need to tell you some things about me and my past so you can decide if you want me as well." The words almost seemed to pain him as they came out.

"I don't think anything you're going to tell me is going to scare me away Christian.", though the look he was giving her was telling her otherwise.

"Perhaps the day after your interview you can come over and we can have dinner, and talk. I wouldn't want to get in your head before that. You already have enough going on."

"Okay," She said breathlessly, suddenly feeling nervous at the prospect of what he would tell her.

Ana stepped into the lobby of Seattle Independent Publishing. It was a quaint publishing house, not like many of the other larger ones. However, this one seemed to produce the type of books she'd be interested in, and on top of that, it was a way to get her foot in the door.

Her attire she had chosen was a black pencil skirt with a grey blouse, and a pair of black pumps that Kate had lent her. She hoped it was appropriate enough for an interview. Her brown hair lay over her shoulder in waves, and her makeup was done lightly, thanks to Kate as well.

"I'm here to speak with Mr. Roach." Ana said to the receptionist who gave her a warm smile and instructed her to take a seat. She fidgeted, her foot tapping the floor until her name was called.

She was led to a large office that surprisingly was extremely messy. Manuscripts lay all over the desk, and the books lay askew.

She sat in the chair, waiting until Roach walked in with a booming, "Ana! So nice to see you again!" He shook her hand, sitting at his desk. "Did you enjoy the event? I have to say.. Grace and Carrick sure do put on a good one! "

She let out a small nervous laugh, "Yes, I had a wonderful time. I hope you did as well."

"I did, I did. This is my colleague Jack Hyde; he'll be sitting in on the interview since you'd be working closely together." He motioned to a man that walked in and moved to sit in the corner of the room. He was handsome, with longer hair pulled back and a single earring hanging from his year.

Roach slapped his hands together, "Onto business. Why do you want to work in publishing Ana? Christian informs me you're not yet done with school, but education doesn't tell me anything. Passion does. So, wow me."

"Okay.. well. Have you ever found yourself in a situation where you feel out of control and you wish you could escape? But then you open up one of your favorite books and suddenly you find yourself immersed in a different world and it sucks you in, consumes you. And you know you always have that as a place to go. I want to have a part in making that happen Mr. Roach." She said with confidence. If it was one thing she loved, it was books.

"Wonderful." He said lightly before turning to have a whispered conversation with the man sitting in the corner. They both nodded and Roach turned back to Ana. "Anastasia, we'd like to offer you the Editorial Manuscript Coordinator position."

Ana suddenly looked at Roach, "I'm sorry, what? I thought this was for an administrative assistant position."

"Well, it was. But I've got a good feeling about you, and I think that you'd be wasting your talents in that position."

She could see out of the corner of her eye, this Jack gentleman staring at her. It made her uncomfortable. "Well, thank you then. I assure you I'll do it to the best of my ability."

Roach waved a hand at her. "I have no worries there. Now... let's make an appointment, you'll come and fill out your employee paperwork and then train with Jack." He motioned to the man.

Ana couldn't tell if the grin on his face was happy or menacing.

Christian stared at his security team in front of him, two of which shifted uncomfortably under his stare. He sat, with one Armani covered leg crossed over the other, his fingertips pressed against each other.

"Taylor..." He began, his voice steady but hostile. "How in the fuck did Leila Williams get into my mother's event?"

Taylor cleared and his throat and stepped forward, his hands behind his back.

"Sir, Ms. Williams attended as a guest of a gentleman named Alexander Monaghan. She wasn't on the guest list, because apparently she was a last-minute guest." He said, watching as Christian stood and walked closer towards them.

Alexander, another dominant, he thought, laughing slightly out loud. "Has contact been made with her since? This must breach the fucking NDA at some point!"

"Sir, she didn't approach you, nor did she speak of anyone about you other than to Ana. We may be able to get her for that, but other than that... she was just a guest of another gentleman."

"How the FUCK would she even know to approach Ana?!" Christian stood, running his hands through his copper hair and tugging.

His team stayed quiet, and after taking a deep breath, he turned again. "All but Taylor and Sawyer, you're dismissed."

The two men stood, waiting for instructions.

"I need to make sure that this never happens again. Sawyer should Anastasia be... spending more time with me, you'll be her personal security. I never want to hear of something like that happening again."

"Sir." Sawyer confirmed.

"Taylor, I need to know where the others are... and I need to make sure they keep quiet."

"Yes sir."

The rang on Christians desk, and upon seeing Andrea's name clicked the speaker on. "Yes, Andrea?"

"Sir, Mrs. Lincoln is here. She's saying she needs to speak with you."

Christian grasped at his face, "Fuck... okay, give me a moment."

Elena walked in the room, and immediately Christian scowled at her. For too long he had put up with her antics, and for too long had she controlled him.

Her face looked new but too shiny, the result of Botox over the years. She sauntered in like she owned the place, her hips swinging back and forth.

"Christian, darling." She leaned into him, placing a kiss on his cheek before sitting in the chair in front of his desk with one leg crossed over the other.

He wondered how he had ever thought she was attractive.

"Good afternoon Elena. What are you doing here?" He asked, sitting down, and leaning back in his chair. He wondered vaguely what Ana was doing.

"A few different reasons dear." She grabbed her overly large black purse, pulling out a folder. "First, I saw your dear friend Anastasia.. she looked well."

Christian raised an eyebrow at her. "She is well."

"Hmm. Well, I was so sad that I missed your mothers' event. Business." She mumbled, opening the folder, and placing a few sheets of paper on his desk.

It only took him a moment before he gasped at her audacity and pushed them to the side. "Are you fucking kidding me?" He stood, grabbing onto the desk. "Are you really here to show me pictures of potential submissive's?"

She frowned for a moment before changing her tactic. "Christian..." She purred, "I know this must be killing you, not having a woman at their knees for this entire time... and these women have all been vetted, and each are perfect!"

"Elena, no. That's the final answer. I'm done with the lifestyle. No."

Elena scowled at him. "Fine.."

"Elena, did you know that Leila Williams would be attending the Coping Together event?"

Her eyes widened, and with every bit of drama she could muster she said, "What?! Of course,not dear!" She paused for a moment as he stared at her. "So how did your date with Anastasia go?"

He laughed, shaking his head, and walking with his arms crossed over his chest. Jealousy did not look good on her.

"It went great." He bragged, watching as her smile faltered.

She snapped her folder closed, standing. "Well, then. I have other things to attend to today." She pulled her purse over her shoulder and without so much as a good-bye walked out of his office.