To Live in Fear

Chapter 1

Harsh Awakenings

By: Aireonna (a.k.a. Candice Willman)

Disclaimer: I do not own Roswell or any of the characters on the show. I do own this story though. ^^

A/N: I love Michael and Maria! They're my favorite couple on the show. And I finally decided to write a fic about them. But, this time, Maria is the one who is going through the hard time. Her mother becomes to drunk, and without knowing it, abuses Maria. Maria doesn't say anything the first time; she thinks it will only happen once. But it becomes more frequent. Finally; she turns to friends for help.

Walking up the few stairs that her porch held, Maria DeLuca turned the key in the door and sighed to herself. Another long night shift at the Crashdown. Looking to the driveway, she noted that her mother was not yet home. Shrugging it off, it was normal. Amy DeLuca always stayed out late, looking for another man, bar hopping, the usual.

Opening the door, she walked in and shut it behind her. Turning around, the house was dark. Normally a few lights were left on here and there, but tonight, nothing. Throwing her coat down on the couch, she stepped towards the nearest lamp and tripped over a shoe.

"Gah! Damn it!" Maria yelled as the pain throbbed in her foot. Rolling her green eyes, she reached her destination and turned the small lamp on. Running up the stairs and down the long hallway to her bedroom, she smiled to herself.

"Finally, sleep." Kicking her shoes off, she plopped back onto her bed and stared up at the blank ceiling. What a night. Liz had disappeared to god knows where with Max. Those two had been spending a lot more time together lately. That left her to the busy night alone. Not to mention, Michael never showed up, so Jose had to sub cook. That caused her to shudder at the thought. He was such a pervert.

"Just wait Michael Guerin. I will pay you back." She growled into the darkness of her room. Jumping up from her bed, she threw off the clothing she had worn that day, and slipped on her pajamas. A small blue tank top and boxers. Throwing her hair up into a small ponytail, she smiled in confirmation and pulled back her bedding. Climbing in and turning off her lamp she stared out the window into the night.

"Gahh, where were you Michael?" Was her last thought before she drifted off to sleep.

CRASH

Maria rolled over in her sleep as the crash echoed throughout the house. Not waking up, she moaned quietly and pulled the covers tighter around her.

"Maria!" Amy DeLuca's voice echoed through the long hallway.

Still not waking, Maria growled softly as the footsteps came closer to her door. Amy stumbled down the hall way as her vision continued to blur. She was drunk as usual. Tripping over her own foot she fell into her daughter's bedroom door and winced in pain.

"Stupid girl." She growled as she stood and fell forward onto the door causing it to squeak open.

"Maria honey time to .to," hiccup, " wake up." Her words were slurred together in her drunken state as she finally made it to the foot of the bed. Glancing up to where her daughter slept her face tightened as she made no effort to wake at her calling.

"Damn it Maria!" Before she knew it, she had jumped onto the Maria's small form and had her pinned down.

Maria's eyes shot open as she felt the bed sink in around her. Her green gems fell upon Amy's form pushing her down into the mattress. Blinking in shock, she could do nothing but stare.

"Mom?" Her voice was just above a whisper as she fought for air. Amy's hand had grabbed a hold of her throat and was squeezing, keeping the air from Maria's lungs.

"Stupid girl! How could you!?" Amy screamed, her breath inches away from Maria's. Maria winced as she was pushed further into the mattress. The smell of alcohol was strong on her mother's breath. Sucking in the little air she could, Maria began to struggle against the form that held her captive.

"Mom! Stop it! Mom!" Tears began to stream down her face as she continued to fight for air. Bringing her fist back, Amy let it strike the side of Maria's face with full force causing her cheek to swell. Blood burst from her lip as the ring her mother wore caught onto her flesh. Wincing in pain, she continued to cry and struggle.

Her thoughts ran through her mind as the scene in front of her continued to play out.

/ What's happening? Why is she doing this? Is she going to kill me?!? Mom!! / Her mind screamed in confusion.

"Stop it! Please!" Her tears continued to fall as her body continued to rack in sobs.

"Stupid child! Him! I told you! Stay away from him! You..." Her words started to trail off as she continued her attack on the struggling Maria. Her hands let go of Maria's throat and Maria gasped for air. Crying, she continued to try and fight air into her lungs. Was it over?

Amy brought both of her fists down to impact into Maria's face and chest, hitting her over and over. Letting out a shrill scream, Maria cried more as the pain filled every inch of her body.

"Mom!!!!" Maria screamed trying to waken her from her drunken state, but nothing seemed to work. Struggling beneath her, she finally was able to push the form off her and fall off the side of the bed. Hitting the floor hard she sobbed into the carpet as her body lay there in a heap. Pain. That's all she could feel. Everywhere ached and throbbed. Hearing her mother's feet hit the ground, she crawled as fast as she could towards the closet door.

"Maria! Come back to your mother!" Amy yelled, leaning down to her small form. Taking her foot, she stomped onto Maria's small back with all her strength. Maria screamed as the air was once again taken from her. A streak of pain shot up her spine and into her brain. Bringing her foot up, she kicked Amy off of her and crawled with all her strength to the closet. Making it, she crawled inside and shut the door firmly behind her. Darkness, there was no light.

Gasping for air, she huddled into a small corner and prayed to what ever there was that her mother would give up.

"Maria! Where ever you are!" And then there was nothing. Maria listened as she heard a thump hit the floor. Figuring she must of passed out cold, she sighed to herself and continued to cry. Hugging her knees to her chest, she rocked back and forth and decided to stay the rest of the night in the closet. Liz would be over in the morning to pick her up for school, she would just have to make sure she was out before hand. Thankful she set her alarm, she closed her eyes as her body continued to throb in pain. Giving into sleep, her last thought lingered on Michael.

Maria yawned as the sound of her alarm clock entered her mind.

/ Shit! / She thought. Slowly opening the closet door and wincing in pain, she sighed thankfully to see her mother still out cold. Shooting up, she quickly turned the loud machine off and sighed as it didn't wake the sleeping form of Amy. Tip toeing towards her door, she grabbed her backpack and other things she needed for school and exited the room without a sound. Entering the bathroom, she closed the door behind her and flipped on the light switch. Her eyes shot closed as pain filled her brain. Her body throbbed, the events from last night replaying themselves through her mind.

Her eyes glanced up into the mirror and what she saw caused her to gasp in horror. Her lip was busted open and there was a huge bruise on her cheek. There were bruises here and there on her neck. Lifting the shirt off of her body, she began to cry at the sight and the pain. Her ribs were full of bruises along with her back. Taking off the rest of her clothing, she let down her long blond hair and stepped into the hot shower. The water ran down her body as she huddled into the back of the tub and cried. The pain was to much for her to handle.

"What am I going to do?" Her voice was raspy and broken. Shaking her head, water continued to flow down her body and burn her flesh.

"I can't tell them, not yet. It was only a one time thing.." Her mind roamed off as it questioned, "Right?"

Washing her body and hair, she wrapped the small towel around her body and dried her eyes of the salty tears. Wincing in pain as she dressed she sighed inwardly. All she could think of and ask herself was 'Why?' Why had her mother attacked her? Why??

Putting on her short black turtle neck sweater and dark blue hip huggers she put her hair up in a natural pony tail and turned to herself in the mirror.

"Thank god for make up." She couldn't help but laugh at the remark as she emptied the contents of her make-up bag onto the bathroom sink. Finding the cover up and other products she needed, she applied it to her face and smiled at herself.

"Done." Opening the medicine cabinet, she found the painkillers and put a few into her mouth.

Grabbing her bag as she heard Liz make way up the steps, she exited the bathroom quietly praying her mother was still passed out on her bedroom floor. Throwing on her tennis shoes she grabbed her keys and exited the front door.

"Maria? Hey!" Liz squealed as she threw her arms around her best friend. Maria tried to hide her wincing as the pain continued to throb.

"Hey." Tightening her jaw she forced a smile and ran down the steps to her car.

"Coming or not?" Her voice held a tint of annoyance in it and Liz smiled.

"Of course! Oh! I am soo sorry about last night." Opening the passenger door of the Jetta, she sat down and looked to see Maria release a low growl.

"Don't worry about it, but you owe me big time." Closing the door, she started the car and drove off to school.

Walking into the big doors, Liz and Maria made their way to their lockers.

"Maria are you sure you're all right? You don't look to good.." Liz replied in concern as she entered the combination to her lock.

"Yeah fine." Her words were spoken low as she grabbed the books she needed and looked towards the direction to see Isabelle Evans and Max Evans making their way towards them. Rolling her eyes she slammed her locker and smiled to Liz.

"Well here comes your boy toy, I'm going to head to class. Love ya." Turning quickly she passed Max with a smile and waved to Is, thanking Michael wasn't with them. Turning the corner she leaned back against the wall and closed her eyes fighting back the tears as the pain still filled her body.

"Hey."

Maria held in the scream that fought to escape her mouth. Jumping, she opened her green eyes to see Michael Guerin standing in front of her with one of those daring looks on his face. Shaking her head she hit his chest and growled.

"Don't do that!" Turning from him before he had the chance to look into her eyes she whipped the tears that had escaped and smiled.

"Hey, are you ok?" Michael's face tightened as he noticed her shaking form. Something wasn't right.

"Yeah. I'm fine. Just a lil jumpy that's all." Turning to face him, she gave him her best 'alright Maria' smile and turned to walk to class.

Michael didn't believe her, grabbing her arm gently his face tightened as she winced in pain. She was actually cowering away from him.

"Maria?" His voice was soft and full of concern. Maria couldn't help but cry. Not wanting him to see her, she chose to run down the hall and out the front doors.

"I can't be here, not now." Running right into Alex, she screamed as she hit the ground.

"Hey there cow girl, slow down a bit." Giving her that charming smile, he lent her a hand and helped her to her feet.

"Yeah, thanks." Pushing back the tears from her eyes Maria turned away and ran to her car.

Michael exited the building to see Alex standing there watching Maria drive away.

"Why did you let her go!?" Michael screamed in rage. Something wasn't right and he needed to know, now.

"What are you talking about? She left." Alex looked at Michael and blinked.

"Something's wrong." Alex whispered as he heard Liz's laughter. The bell rang, and they ran into school not wanting to be late.

Michael stared on after her and looked down to where she had fallen. Stopping, something caught his eye. It was blood, there was blood on the ground.

Was it from Maria??

A/n: Well what do you think so far?? Like it?!? Please say you do! ^^ Please leave a review with your thoughts and look forward to the next chapter!