DISCLAIMER: I wish I owned it. I'd be rich, not to mention really cool if I did...

A/N: I love all of you who've been reading this story! I'm so, so sorry it's taken me so long to update it.. To those of you who are just joining in, let me say something about the first chapter - it's more of a prologue, an introduction - the rest of the fic is very different! So I encourage you to read the second chapter before making up your mind about the fic :)

W/o further ado:

THE BEWITCHMENT OF JAMES POTTER

Chapter 1: Yesterday

A petite teenage girl concealed in a long dark cloak stood on the empty outdoor platform of Hogsmeade Train Station. It was barely past dawn on a dreary Sunday morning; a low chugging in the distance announced a train's upcoming arrival.

Without warning, the grey sky opened and a cold drizzle covered the wooden tracks.

"Great," the girl murmured sarcastically, glaring at the heavy clouds as she pulled her hood lower on her face. She shivered, feeling the cold water begin to make its way through her layers.

I should have worn a thicker cloak, she reprimanded herself silently, hoping that the train she was waiting for would arrive soon.

As if the conductor had heard her thoughts, with clouds of steam and a loud grinding of breaks, the Hogwarts Express announced its arrival.

"That's my cue," she said in a low voice to no one. She tried to lift her heavy trunk, wishing fervently that she were seventeen already and legally able to levitate the cursed thing. As she struggled, a lock of auburn hair became loose and fell across her face.

"Lily!" cried a male voice, one that she identified immediately, from the far end of the tracks. It was the very last voice she wanted to hear.

Resignedly, she looked up to see a tall, raven-haired boy running towards her, his robes flapping wetly behind him, broomstick in hand. He rushed right up before her, a look of profound concern evident in his warm hazel eyes. She turned her head away so that the boy couldn't see the tears forming in her eyes.

"Lily?" repeated James Potter, grabbing her shoulder. "Look at me."

Lily Evans reluctantly turned back to face her boyfriend, but kept her head down, partially concealing her face.

James fingered the top of her cloak. "May I?" he asked softly and gently pushed the hood off her head, revealing shoulder-length dark red hair that fell in unkempt waves, the dark red colour contrasting with her pale skin. He brushed the loose tendrils behind her ears and looked in to her eyes, pained to see that her striking emerald-green eyes were bloodshot and underlined by hollow circles.

Despite this, Lily was still the most beautiful and the most wonderful girl James had ever met, and it wrenched his heart to see her like this, haunted by a grief that she refused to share with him. He tossed his broomstick aside, and gently wrapped his arms around her slender form, his body blocking her from the wind and his height protecting her from the rain.

"I'm really, really sorry about your parents, Lily," he whispered directly into her ears, almost too softly to hear, "I want to be here for you."

James sensed her tremble, and held her even closer, waiting.

Lily's mind was racing; she still could not fully comprehend the intensity of her emotions for him. Their relationship had blossomed unexpectedly at the beginning of their seventh school year, when Lily was shocked to discover that she had a crush on the boy she had once called an arrogant toe-rag.

The events of the past year raced through Lily's mind. The first time she had noticed that James Potter had grown up and was mortified to realise he set her heart racing. The first moment their eyes had locked and she had known she would not be able to resist him. Their first kiss at the steps of the Great Hall, which was interrupted by Sirius Black, as usual. Lazy afternoons spent by the Hogwarts lake. Shameless flirting instead of studying at the library. Their nights in the Head Boy and Girl's study...

They had fallen for each other and had become inseparable, much to the frustration of some of their friends (principally Sirius, who had been dismayed that his partner in crime had developed a new interest that didn't include him) and irritation of some of their teachers (primarily Professor McGonagall, the Head of their House who had frequently caught them committing what she termed 'public indecency' in empty classrooms). No longer Potter and Evans, Head Boy and Head Girl, they had become 'James and Lily'.

And then, in one instant, Lily's life had changed forever.

The news of her parents' sudden deaths two weeks prior had left behind a shadow of her former self. As she was estranged from her sister, James had been her sole comfort, doing surprisingly well for a boy who had previously been rather petrified by crying girls. He had gone home with her to attend the funeral, had held her while she cried, had soothed her as best he could. Lily felt she could not possibly express how much he had come to mean to her, and how much she would miss him.

"How did you find out I was leaving?" she managed to ask. "I was trying to avoid that, you know."

"How do I always find out?"

"I'm seriously going to kill your best friend one day."

"Sirius would deserve it," said James, smiling grimly, then stooped lower so that she had to look into his eyes.

"I just couldn't tell you," she said finally, "because then I'd have to say goodbye."

James tightened his arms around her. During his broomstick flight to the station, he had told himself he was just coming to help and bid her farewell. But in that moment, his fingers brushing past her soft hair, he knew he had lied to himself. He knew he could not let her go, not so easily.

"You don't have to leave," he murmured softly, "let me help you."

Lily recoiled as if slapped, and tried to push James away. "They're dead. Nothing can help."

Reluctantly, James' arms let her go. Lily watched his expression became impossibly somber, the embers of his eyes dimming. "Please, Lily... I just don't know what to say."

"We've talked about this before - there's nothing to say," she said, turning away in anguish, glancing at the waiting train.

"Lily, I..." James began, reaching out for her once more.

"What?" she snapped, then hated herself for doing so.

James' voice faltered. "I... I just don't understand. Why d'you have to leave England? Can't you just stay here with us?"

Lily's eyes dropped, unable to meet his gaze. "James we've been through this..."

"No, we haven't," he said, cutting her off gently. "Not really. You mentioned that you wanted to leave, but I didn't realize you were serious. And I-" he paused to swallow the knot that was forming in his throat, "I thought I could give you a reason to stay."

The usually proud, borderline arrogant boy's cheeks flushed in embarrassment, belying his vulnerability when it came to her.

Lily softened slightly, wanting nothing more than to surrender to him, but knowing that she couldn't.

"James, I need to get my life back together... I can't stay here in Britain," she replied, her eyes wide, pleading for him to understand, to fully comprehend her need to get away. "Everything reminds me of them, everything reminds me that they're gone."

"But why do you have to leave now? There's only three months left till the Right of Passing Feast!"

"Please, don't make this any harder than it is," said Lily, avoiding his eyes once more. "I have no family here anymore... well, other than Petunia, so basically none. I was offered a full scholarship to finish the next few months at Beauxbatons, Dumbledore arranged it, and then I can stay on in France - they guaranteed me an internship upon completion."

James nudged at his reddening eyes. "I'm going to miss you."

"I know," she answered quietly, brushing away the tears that were now sliding down her cheeks.

"No, you don't. You have no idea how much," he said, his eyes narrowing.

"Of course I do," she said, shivering as she felt the rain water trickle down her back. "I'm going to miss you too."

"Damn it, you're getting wet." Without hesitating, James undid the fastenings of his cloak and draped it over her shoulders.

Lily immediately struggled to remove the cloak. "It's really sweet of you, but my train is leaving soon anyway..." her voice trailed off as James firmly fixed the clasp. "James, really, I don't need-"

"Keep it," he said hoarsely.

Lily eyed the gold fastenings. "James, it must have cost a for- "

"Keep it," he repeated with more force.

Lily knew it was pointless to refuse. She watched as a tear rolled down his cheek, and felt immediate guilt for the hurt she was causing him.

James is anything but a crybaby.

James immediately raised a hand to brush the tear off, but Lily caught the hand before he could do so. Their eyes locked.

She stared into the depths of his hazel eyes, and he could not have ripped his eyes from hers.

"Oh James, it's not like I'm the only one leaving!" said Lily, breaking the silence.

"I'm going away to the Auror Academy up north. You're going to different country."

"It's only for a few years," began Lily, and then froze.

Years. The word hit Lily right in the heart. Can I live for years alone without my friends here? And James... I despised him for so long - Merlin, was he an arse - but then I realised he had changed, I had changed, and now... now I know I'm in love with him. I haven't told him that I feel this strongly for him, but I can't possibly tell him the truth, not now that I'm leaving, not now that I'm willingly going to walk away from him.

Years. James' mind reeled at the very thought. How can I allow that to happen? I'd resented her for the first few years I knew her, for hanging out with Snivellus, sure, outsmarting me in lessons, of course, but more than anything for disliking me! I just couldn't help making an arse of myself when she was around... but this year was incredible; she finally liked me back! We became so close. How can I possibly spend years apart from her?

The train whistled loudly for the second time.

"I really have to go now." Lily tried to pick up her trunk again. James, always the gentleman, brushed her aside. "Don't be ridiculous," he said gruffly, easily hoisting the trunk up to his shoulder. They walked across the damp platform to the train together, and he loaded it into the baggage compartment. "Are you sure you have everything?"

Lily looked at him, and something stirred up inside her. "No, not everything."

"What's that? What are you missing?" asked James, puzzled at how calm she looked.

"You."

James heart began to pound, daring to hope. "W-What?"

"I'm in love with you, James," she said, her voice catching. "D'you know that?"

James immediately reached out for her once more, his lips pressing on her head. "Please, please stay here with me," his voice pleaded, "Stay here with me."

Lily buried her face in his chest, her forehead resting below his shoulder, the way she had many times during the year. As she inhaled his familiar scent, she thought of the many times when she had been held here. "I can't," she repeated, mumbling into the robes.

"You can!"

"How can I?" she whispered miserably. "There's nothing for me here."

James moved her away from the hug and held her at arm's length. He traced her damp cheek with his index finger tenderly, and made a decision he knew he would never regret.

"Marry me," he whispered, barely above the sound of the wind.

"What!" gasped Lily, her eyes widening in pure shock.

James blushed, the boyish blush that was cute and so James at the same time."Look, I know we're very young - okay, so we're ridiculously young! And yes, I realize we have no idea what will happen in the future. But I know how I feel about you, and it's never going to go away. If you feel the same way about me, I don't care about anything else, as long as I'm holding you... Lily, think about how amazing it could be. Will you, please, marry me?"

Lily felt that her feet had frozen to the ground.

It seemed like all her dreams could come true. James, her boyfriend, the boy she loved, had proposed to marry her.

It's James, say yes, say YES! her heart screamed.

But Lily was Lily, and she listened to her brain, not her heart. "James, we're just too young for this," she said, dropping her eyes. "You can't mean it."

"Don't I?" James said, his eyes boring holes into Lily's. "I have wanted to say it ever since I realized that I'm in love with you."He drew a deep breath and decided to say everything he had meant to say. "I didn't think love was even possible, I always thought it only existed in those silly romance books you witches read. And once I realised you were it for me - I was about thirteen, mind you - I got really scared and decided that I didn't want to love you, so I tried so hard not to! I denied it to myself, I denied it to my friends... But now, the only thing I care about is you and being with you." James took a deep breath. "I want to marry you, Lily, and quite frankly, I've been considering the idea for the past couple of months."

Lily forced herself away from his arms, feeling her heart break as she did so. "James, I... I can't marry you."

She felt her soul wrench when she saw more tears on his cheek.

He drew his breath in slowly. "Why not?" he said, crouching to be at her eye level, hoping to let her see into his soul.

She turned slightly, and instead kissed his cheek, softly, slowly, lingering on his skin. "Goodbye James."

James felt his heart rip, his cheek stinging where her lips had been.

She straightened her shoulders and wiped the tears off her cheeks with the sleeve of her robes. Her vision blurry, she headed toward the train, and unthinkingly choose a window seat. She looked out, and saw James still standing on the platform, his tall muscular build hunched over in defeat.

His lips were moving, and Lily saw something white fluttered out of his hand. It soared right towards her, pausing at the rain-speckled window. She quickly slid it open, and the object drifted onto her lap. She looked down, and saw a flower - a simple, beautiful white lily.

Her fingers brushed the droplets off of it, and found a note pinned to the stem. She unfolded it, her hands trembling slightly; she had to read it twice before the words made sense.

I love you. Just You.

She leaned out of the open window. "James!"

He straightened up and saw Lily's hair flying out in the brisk wind. He hurried towards her.

She reached her hand out, and James tried to touch it, but they only brushed each other by as the train had started up. "Promise you won't come find me!"

James face contorted in a mix of anguish and sorrow. "What?"

The train began to move forward slowly, separating them.

"I'll promise you anything! But please don't leave!" he yelled, running beside the tracks, catching up to Lily's window.

The train picked up speed, and the distance between them widened.

"Lily!"

James came panting to a halt.

Lily looked behind and caught a glimpse of James standing on very end of the ever-shrinking tracks, staring after her, his body getting smaller and smaller until he was just a small dark figure in the distance. The train rounded a corner, and he disappeared from her view entirely.

"Lily..."

James stayed where he was at the end of the platform, the wind now blowing so hard his robes were billowing around behind him, the rain stinging his eyes.

He bent his head.

Let her be safe. Let me see her again.

Even though he was shivering in his robes, soaked through and his warm cloak now gone, he remained there at the train station, staring at the horizon.

"James!"

James, knowing the voice all too well, spun around to glare at the person who had dared to intrude on his thoughts.

A tall dark figure with long black hair wearing Hogwarts robes was standing next to him.

"Prongs, you damn fool," hissed Sirius, "what the hell are you doing out here in the bloody rain?"

James ignored him, and walked away towards the direction from in which the train had disappeared.

However, Sirius wasn't about to let James ignore him. He strode up to his best friend and gave him a light shove. "She's left already, and there's nothing you can do about it! We should go back to the castle."

Rainwater was dripping freely down James' nose. "Leave me alone," he snapped, setting his jaw as he attempted to walk away.

Sirius grabbed James's shoulder. "Look, I'm just trying to help."

James turned to face Sirius.

Black could barely recognise his best friend's face. He looked so hurt and vulnerable that Sirius, for once, was at a loss for words.

"Look at me, Padfoot. I need her."

"I know you love her."

"And no doubt, you've also seen and heard enough about it just now," said James, narrowing his eyes in anger as he noticed his Invisibility Cloak peeking out of Sirius' pocket.

"Bloody hell, it makes no difference. She's gone."

James began storming away from him.

Again, Sirius grabbed his shoulder and pulled him back. "You have to face the facts and focus on this summer. You, me, the Auror Academy, remember? The one thing you've always wanted?"

"I don't care!" shouted James, pushing Sirius away. "Damn it, don't you understand? I don't want it anymore! I want her."

"Well, she's the one thing you can't have. It's over."

Without pausing to think, James punched Sirius on the jawbone. Hard.

Sirius staggered back, a look of shock on his face. "You can hit me all you want-" he paused to spit out some blood, "-but that won't bring her back!"

"I know that."

Sirius looked at James as he gingerly touched his injury. "Then pull it together."

"Leave me alone, mate."

"You're already alone enough."

James looked up at Sirius, and his expression was so full of despair that Sirius cursed himself for saying it.

"I love her."

Sirius reached out, and this time he was not pushed away. He pulled James into a hug. "I know, mate."

"I love her."

THREE YEARS LATER

It was midnight on a cool February night in Surrey, England.

Special Auror James Potter sat up in his king-sized bed, waking up with a cold sweat. He had just had to relive the worst day of his life in his dreams.

"James?"

James looked to his left. Stretched out on the bed, dressed only in her thin black slip, was Jinah Chang.

My girlfriend.

"Sorry, did I wake you?" asked James, sliding his feet out the bed to stand up. He bent down, picked up his deep red nightshirt off the floor, and pulled it over his head.

"Don't worry about it," answered Jinah softly. She yawned and stretched, her long jet black hair shimmering over the pillow. "Was it The Dream again?"

James pushed aside the feeling of irritation that crept over him. James had never told Jinah what was in his dream, and so, she just wrote it off as The Dream, an annoying little "phase" he underwent every so often.

Little does she know.

"Yeah. How did you know?" he asked, standing up in the dim light.

Jinah sat up and gave James a fixed look. "Whenever you have it, you wake up panting and all sweaty. Sometimes you cry out."

James bumped his shin on the corner of the bed. "I talk in my sleep?"

"Only one or two words, usually."

"Which are?"

"'Lily' or 'No'." James, why do you have nightmares about flowers?"

A slight tremor ran down his back. "Oh, they're nothing, really," he said; one of the first things James had been trained to do was lie. "I'm just allergic."

Okay, so that wasn't my best effort...

"Well, it's over now. Why don't you come lie down and relax?" suggested Jinah lazily, patting the spot next to her.

James shook his head. "No, I won't be able to sleep for a while. I think I'll just go sit out on the balcony."

"Want company?" she said, curving her spine upward off the bed suggestively, her curves set off by the moonlight.

"No." His tone was cold and final.

"Oh, okay," said Jinah, giving him a hurt look, as she turned back to the bed.

James immediately felt guilty. "Hey, give me a kiss," he said, putting his arms around her waist from behind her. She turned, smiling at him.

"Hmm, I don't know James... a kiss? Sounds too expensive."

He tightened his grip around her waist and pulled her close to him. "I can afford it." He kissed her roughly and briefly.

"Mmm," she protested as he pulled away.

James turned wordlessly and opened the French doors that led out to the balcony of his room. He breathed in the crisp night air and looked out to the sleepy country landscape.

Where are you now?

As per her request, James hadn't followed Lily to France. He had been tempted to, but Sirius, Remus, Peter, and anyone else he had mentioned it to had been against it. He knew it couldn't be too difficult to find her – he knew she was working at the French Ministry of Magic; he even knew what department. He had many friends in France; he even went there often. But he did not seek her out.

And so he had neither seen her, nor heard from her, except for on three occasions.

When he had finished training at the Academy, and became a fully accredited Auror, he had received an letter from Lily. The familiar yet long unseen handwriting had made him yearn for her all over again.

James,

Congratulations!

Not only for graduating, but also for the High Honours. I am so happy for you!

All is well here.

-Lily

It taken every bit of strength and resolve James had to restrain himself from going to her immediately.

But he had made a promise.

She wrote him two more times afterward - letters of condolence, first for his mother's and then for his father's passing. They had been difficult times, but he had been prepared for them.

And yet... there was a certain loneliness, exacerbated by the solitude of being an only child.

He knew that, of anyone, she could fully understand what it was like to feel alone.

Beyond that, he simply missed her. Still.

James stared out at the sickle moon, his hands gripping the cold railing.

Lily.