Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter in any way.

Title: Star-Gazing

By: starwandmagical

Type of Fic: One-shot

Pairings: Harry/Ginny

(After the Fourth Book)

It's so peaceful. A soft blanket under me, the clear night sky full of twinkling stars above me, a crescent moon hanging high in the sky, and the sound of crickets surrounding me on this lazy summer night…I could stay here all night. Mum had packed me some sandwiches, juice, and fresh baked chocolate-chipped cookies.

Harry was arriving at the Burrow tonight; in fact, he's probably already here. I could be back in the house, stealing glances at him across the dinner table. I could be there laughing and chatting with my brothers and Harry while trying to conceal my emotions.

So why wasn't I there? It's because I can't handle the storm of emotions inside me anymore. I can't look at Harry in the eyes and joke with him as a normal friend. I want so much more. Yes, it is a bit selfish isn't it? Why can't I be satisfied with his friendship? I sighed deeply and turned my gaze up to the stars. All my worries and fears fade away when I lie there. No brothers to escape from when they want to tickle me or mess up my hair. No mother to nag about homework or about Harry. No dad to jump all over the place when he brings home another Muggle invention. And the best of all, no Harry. It's not that I don't like my family, I do. But once in a while, a quiet time when I can actually hear my own thoughts or have no thoughts at all is precious. And it's not that I don't like Harry. I do. The whole family knows I do. The whole school knows I do. Hell, Harry knows I do.

But being around Harry is tiring and I need time away to recuperate. It's absolute torture to have him so close yet so far at the same time. I have to think about every word I speak, every movement I make, and so on.

I wonder if anyone missed me yet. I think I've been gone for an hour already. Humming softly to myself, I wished I could always feel so tranquil and carefree.

"Ginny?"

Startled by the intrusion in my private little world, I sat up with a small shriek. Whipping my head around, I saw Harry Potter himself standing there.

I smiled weakly up at him, although I was avoiding eye contact. "You frightened me." Wow talk about stating the obvious, Ginny.

"Sorry."

"Err…there's plenty of space on the blanket if you want to sit down." Argh, what made you think he is out here to spend time with you anyway?

"Thanks." Harry sat down next to me.

"Want a sandwich?"

He reached over and took one. "Thanks."

I found myself thinking that if he expresses his gratitude in the form of "Thanks" one more time I would smother him with the blanket. Since I don't want him dead, I should tell him.

"Harry, if you say thanks one more time, I'm going to strangle you."

He looked surprised and turned his head to look at me. My breath caught when his beautiful emerald eyes looked into my ordinary brownish ones. His mouth twitched and slowly a smile formed on those perfect lips. Is he trying to give me a heart attack?

"Why are you here?" I found myself asking.

He blinked, confused. "Because Dumbledore gave permission for me to spend the rest of the summer here with your family."

Exasperated I rolled my eyes. "I know why you are here at the Burrow, you idiot, I meant why are you, you know, here?" I said, gesturing at the blanket we are sitting comfortably on.

He looked amused. "I think I'm witnessing another Weasley temper at work here."

"Sorry about calling you an idiot."

He shrugged and gave me a small grin while munching on the sandwich. Whatever. I moved to lie on my back, resuming the position I had before he interrupted me. He still hasn't answered my question…but so what. I mean what matters is that Harry Potter is here next to me and I'm not making a fool of myself!

I laid there and he sat there finishing the sandwich. Eating the last bite, he sighed contently and settled down to lie on his back. "I'm here because your mom told me to come get you. She was worried."

Oh. So, he's here because my mom told him to come. And here I was hoping that he's here because he noticed I was missing and came out to search for me.

"You found me. I'm fine. You can go back up to the house and do stuff with Ron."

He didn't say anything for a moment. I turned my head a little to look at him. My heart skipped a beat when I realized he was looking at me. Did I have something on my face? I started to feel self-conscious.

"What?" I asked.

"Nothing," he said, looking away, "Do you do this often?"

"A few times a week, yea."

"It's very calming."

"That's why I come here."

"Ginny?"

"Hmm?"

"Do you still have…dreams?"

My body tenses as I realized he wanted to talk about what happened back in my first year at Hogwarts. I also realized he is actually going to open up a little, not to Ron, not to Hermione, but me. I didn't know if I was ready for this conversation, for its painful for me to dig up the memories…or the lack of memories…so I played stupid.

"Everyone has dreams Harry."

"No. I meant…ah forget it." He slowly stood up. "I'm going back to the house. Your mom wanted me to remind you not to fall asleep out here."

Harry turned to walk away but something made me want him to stay. I felt that if I let him walk away this time, I would never even have a chance to see him walk away from me again. I sat up and stared blankly at my shoes.

"They don't occur every night anymore. But once, twice a week…yea, they come back to haunt me." I blurted out. His footsteps still and I close my eyes, blocking out the stars and the moon. "It doesn't lessen for you…does it?" Stupid question, Ginevra. Of course, it doesn't lessen for him. If I was Harry, I wouldn't be able to sleep at all. And especially after what happened to Cedric…

I was shaken out of my thoughts when I realized that Harry has sat back down next to me.

"No."

His answer was so soft but I heard it. A part of me was curious as to why he's suddenly opening up to of all people, me. Another part of me doesn't care why, I just cared that he IS talking to me. Not about Quidditch, not about my family, not about school. We are talking about something that both of us has experienced that no one else will ever understand fully. We both had close encounters with Voldemort. Me, with the 16 year-old memory of Tom Riddle in a magic diary. And Harry, with the present-day AND the past forms of Voldemort. I can't even begin to imagine what his nightmares were like.

"Harry…" I didn't know what to say.

"I dream of Cedric's death. I dream that in his place, it was Ron. Or Hermione, or another member of your family, or a friend at school. I dream of the basilisk, its eyes dripping blood, its fangs coming closer and closer to me. I dream of Quirrel and Voldemort attached to the back of his head. I dream of the Dementors, their rotting hand reaching out from behind their robes to grab me. I…dream…" his voice cracked and he fell silent. Looking at him, I wanted to cry myself. He had drawn up his knees, rested his forehead on them, and wrapped his arms around his legs.

I didn't reach out to touch him. I am afraid that if I touch him, he might snap and lose control.

"In my dreams, my hands are always drenched in blood. I would be standing at one place and the next second I wouldn't know where I was. I dream of dark hallways and talking to the basilisk, commanding it to kill. I dream that I keep running and running away from the diary…but it just keeps chasing me. Wherever I turn, its right there, wanting me to write in it. I dream that I would slowly come out of a trance and realize you are dead in front of me and your blood is on my clothes, on my hands." I stopped, not wanting to relive any more of my nightmares.

Harry had lifted his head from his knees and looked at me intently. I sighed. "Harry…I know you've probably heard this from everyone else but…it wasn't your fault. He was at the wrong place at the wrong time. You can't take responsibility for everything Voldemort does. You have to not place blame on yourself but on Voldemort. He is the reason for everything that has happened to you. He is the reason for all the deaths. Harry…do you hear me?"

He nodded and I could see unshed tears glittering in his eyes. Not exactly knowing what I was doing, I shifted so I sat facing him and reached out with both hands to remove his glasses. Putting them aside, I tilted my head and stared back into his eyes. There was nothing blocking them anymore. I could see the pain and self-guilt that wracked his soul.

"Why do you like me Ginny?" He asked quietly. I was caught by surprise but I knew the answer straight away. I had often asked myself the same question and over the period of 5 years, I knew the answer.

Feeling a surge of courage course through me, I reached out, took one of his hands, and held it, examining every line on his palm slowly. As I traced the lines on his palm, I spoke.

"I grew up on the tales of the Boy Who Lived. I grew up daydreaming of the boy named Harry Potter who, as a baby, survived even when the Dark Lord had performed the Killing curse. I had an infatuation with this hero in my world. The first time I saw you, saw how unsure you were of the barrier to get onto Platform 9 ¾ , I realized that you weren't that different from everyone else. You were a normal person, one who yet had to learn the ways of the Wizarding world and had to learn to cope with the sudden status of a famous person. As the years past, I realized that it didn't matter if you were the famous Harry Potter or not. I observed you from afar, watching you go through hardships that a boy your age should never have to go through. Watching and learning what you liked, what you didn't like, and how you reacted to situations. At the end, its all very simple." Glancing up to be able to say the words while looking in his eyes, I took a deep breath. "Harry, I love you for being you. If you didn't do the things you did, and I met you because of Ron, I would still slowly fall in love with you." My heart was pounding as I realized what I had just done. I let go of his hand and quickly stood up. Licking my lips nervously, I darted my eyes down to Harry, who was sitting very still.

"I-I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said so much. I-." I could feel a panic attack starting. I wished a hole can appear below me and swallow me up.

Harry picked up his glasses and put them on. He stood up and was quiet. I was ready to run somewhere, ANYWHERE, when he finally spoke.

"Thank you, Ginny."

I feel the nervousness ease away and I gave him a small smile. "I thought I told you I'll strangle you if you say thank you one more time."

His eyes widened as a smirked appeared on my face and I reached down to snatch the blanket.

"You can't be serious." He said stepping back.

Someone needs to bring some fun into Harry's world and tonight that person is going to be me.

"I suggest you run, Potter."

He ran from me with a yell and I chased after, the blanket flapping in my hands. I wasn't the baby sister of six older brothers for nothing. I quickly proved that by catching up with him and threw the blanket around him, tightly wrapping it around him so his arms are trapped by his side. Then I tackled him to the ground and sat on his stomach.

"Beg for mercy!" I yelled.

"NEVER!" he roared back, laughing.

"Ok then, I'll just have to find out if the great Mr. Harry James Potter is ticklish or not." I cackled and my fingers moved in for the attack.

The great Harry Potter was reduced into a blubbering idiot in a matter of seconds after I started tickling him.

"Beg for mercy!" I grinned down at him.

"NEVER SAY DIE!" he choked out.

I guess being a seeker for four years DOES make a difference because suddenly I found myself pinned down and Harry sitting on my stomach.

He rubbed his hands together and had a gleeful gleam in his eyes.

"REVENGE is MINE!" he yelled, tickling me.

"NONONONO! MERCY MERCY MERCY!" I gasped out.

He got off me and stood up, then offered me a hand. I took it and after I stood up, he didn't let go.

"I'm happy I got to know you better tonight, Ginny. Makes me wonder what a good friend I missed these past years."

I shrugged and kept quiet.

"All joking aside…I really want to thank you for listening to me tonight. Letting them out a little felt…nice."

I looked into his beautiful eyes. "Harry, I'll always be ready to lend an ear. Don't keep stuff bottled up, ok? And…no one really understood the terror that those dreams brings…I'm relieved I told you about them, because you understand more than anyone ever could."

I moved closer and slipped my arms around his waist to give him a hug. "Thank you, Harry." My ear was pressed against his chest and I could hear his heart beat quicken a little.

He had stiffened when I hugged him but slowly he relaxed and wrapped his arms around me, one hand rubbing my back soothingly.

"Will you be out here again tomorrow?" he said into my ear.

"Probably."

"Would you mind if I joined you?"

Pulling back slightly, I looked up at him. "Is this a friendship offering?"

He thought about it for a minute. "Yes." Then he paused and shook his head. "No."

I must've looked very confused. He sighed and raised a hand to tuck some stray hair behind my ear. "Ginny, I can't return what you feel for me overnight. But, if you are willing to wait a while more…I would like to get to know you better."

Feeling renewed hope flow through me, I smiled with some tears of happiness gathering in my eyes. "I'll always be waiting, Harry."