I do not own Yu-Gi-Oh! The characters in this story, or anything else that has been patented! If I did then I would be insanely rich, I definitely wouldn't need to be writing fanfictions, and the show would be a little different, heh heh heh. The only things I own are the ideas for this story and crap laying around my bedroom floor. So anyway, DON'T sue me because all you will get will be six fifty in loose change, my school supplies, and an enormous lawyer bill.
Wow, I haven't updated in a reeeeally long time. I haven't been here in a really long time. I haven't actually watched the show in a really long time... oh well, I've been busy. I don't know if anyone actually reads this any more, but I had written this much of the fourth chapter a while ago and decided I might as well put it up. It wasn't supposed to be finished, but hey, at least there will be a recent update.
Chapter Four: Definition Of An Apartment
Tuesday, 3:50 pm
Kaiba's Spare Apartment
Ok, when people say 'apartment' you usually know what they're referring to. But when the Kaiba brothers say 'apartment,' that seems to translate roughly into 'whole floor luxury flat.' To make matters worse Seto gave a slightly embarrassed "Sorry, it's not much..." when we entered. It would have been nice if Joey and Tristan had closed their mouths, but hey, we can all only hope for so much, right?
Mokuba dropped his backpack carelessly onto a nearby cushy looking couch covered with expensive white leather, kicked off his shoes on what looked suspiciously like an authentic Persian rug, and bounced towards what looked like a gourmet chef's kitchen. Seto followed hurriedly, probably afraid to be left alone with us, hehe! So naturally we all piled in after him.
Awed silence.
"Um, nice white marble floors..." Tea commented as she looked around.
"...and nice fountain..." Yugi added faintly.
"...wow, that's quite a stove you have there!" Was Ryou's comment.
"Sheesh he's going to have to clean up some drool later." Bakura interjected scornfully.
"...aren't those only imported from a remote village in India?..."
"...oh...my...god...IS THAT WHAT I THINK IT IS!" We turned in surprise and saw Joey and Tristan's faces twisted into strange parodies of cartoons with beating hearts for eyes. We followed their gaze to a huge refrigerator and blanched.
"Uh...that's just the fridge." Mokuba said, as if we were Neanderthals. Seto and he exchanged a glance and then rolled their eyes in exactly the same fashion before turning away indifferently. I would have laughed at how cute that was, but Joey and Tristan were scrambling inside of the refrigerator.
"JUST THE FRIDGE!" Came muffled screams from inside.
"Maybe you should rein in your boyfriend a bit Tomb Robber." I commented blandly towards the other with a smirk.
"Maybe you should just shut it Pharaoh." He snarled back.
Humph, how rude! Hehe, I love pushing his buttons. Of course he does the same to me at every opportunity so it evens out. I'll just consider that payback for his actions downstairs.
Hmm, Seto is leaning towards Mokuba and whispering something. Maybe I'll just inch a little closer and eavesdrop while the others are gawking at Joey and Tristan...
"...there a particular reason you just had to bring these dolts up here?"
"Seto, that's rude!"
"They're rude." Seto is looking distinctly sulky while he says this.
"Big brother!"
"I wont apologize if it's true."
"They're my friends!"
"Why can't you pick better friends?"
"Well then define what you mean by 'better,' and don't be picky."
"Friends that I could vaguely tolerate being around?"
"And ruin all the fun?"
"I get the feeling you're being uncooperative on purpose little brother."
Sigh, it's no wonder Seto doesn't like people seeing him around his brother. It definitely reveals that he isn't a machine...human even...with a personality...dare I say likeable?...sometimes quite funny...
Oh wow I didn't realize that Joey and Tristan could carry that much food! No wonder they don't ever go to the gym, their food burns off the calories. You'd think that they'd be a little more polite about taking massive quantities of food out of someone else's fridge, especially when that someone is Seto Kaiba. Oh well. I bet Seto would put up with just about anything right now if it meant we'd leave any sooner. Oh, he's turning around now!
"Here Mokuba, I fixed you some-GOOD GOD!" Seto started uncharacteristically.
"Huh? What did-JOEY THAT SANDWICH IS AT LEAST A FOOT THICK!" Mokuba grabbed his head with his hands as said blonde began trying to cram said sandwich into his mouth.
Reflectively, I guess the Kaiba brothers really don't have lunch with us much, so maybe this is a bit surprising. Oh boy, that crystal vase looks like it's going to fall any moment with Tristan's elbow that close. Oh shit there it goes!
4:00
Yeah, that was an adventure. After Tristan broke the crystal vase everything went downhill from there.
Let's see...well, the crash startled Tristan into floundering sideways, which bumped him into Joey, who choked on an olive. Joey, for obvious reasons, didn't want to choke so started flailing around, knocking into Tea who then tripped over Bakura's foot, sending both onto the floor. Around this time Yugi was pounding on Joey's back and suddenly the olive came flying out, hitting Seto on the forehead and falling to the ground. Bakura started shouting at Tea for touching him and shoved her off, causing her to trip Tristan who grabbed the nearest object, Yugi, who then grabbed the second nearest object, a table cloth, that then followed them all down into a heap. Oh yeah, and there was a vase with flowers on the table, so water and soggy flowers joined the heap on the floor. As if this wasn't enough, Seto wasn't too pleased about an olive, let alone one that had been in Joey's mouth, hitting his forehead so he started forward to put in his two cents. Mokuba grabbed his hand to stop him, which put him off balance, which made it infinitely worse when he stepped on the olive that was now laying on the ground, and slid forward. Mokuba let go in time and back pedaled hastily until he was standing next to me, leaving us the only two unaffected...because not only did Seto slide on the olive, but Joey just stared as the brunette careened into him, causing Seto to end up practically in Joey's arms. Joey staggered back, hit a chair, stepped on the cuff of Tristan's pants, and then had his feet jerked out from under him when Tristan pulled it out from under his shoe, sending Seto to the floor with Joey falling square on top of him.
Then there was silence...except for the 'drip...drip...drip' of the flower vase water dripping off the edge of the table onto the tangle of human limbs below.
Mokuba and I closed our open mouths and turned to look at each other helplessly, then back to the chaos before us.
'Wow,' that was all we could think.
So here we are, still standing here in shock. Alright, now people are just starting to move again...I guess we should help or something.
4:30
Well I must say that was one weird hell of a half an hour! The gang and I are on our way back to our respective houses now, so I have time to fill in everything that happened.
I guess I'll start right about where my last entry left off.
Sure enough, life was starting to stir again on the kitchen floor. I believe Seto was the first one to utter anything vaguely coherent.
"Mnokuhbah," still pretty muffled considering he had a face full of Joey hair, "I'm guhnna khill hyoo when I ghet outh sfrum unther dhis sthupud mhutth!" This didn't quite convey the menace that it normally would for obvious reasons.
"What Seto?" Mokuba tried to suppress a grin that his brother could luckily not see, "I can't hear you because you're underneath Joey."
Seto uttered something between a cat's hiss and a lion's growl.
"What's wrong with you idiots, you alive down there?" Bakura sat up rubbing a little at his shoulder. Having shoved Tea off of him he wasn't hampered by any bodies around him. He stood and dusted himself off haughtily.
"Oof...my head..." Yugi sat up blearily. "What happened?" He said picking up a wilting tulip that had been plastered to the hem of his wet shirt.
"Tristan," Tea's voice floated from underneath the big pile, "It would be GREATLY appreciated if you got off me."
Yugi clambered off of the pile, shedding bedraggled flowers like a flower girl who stole her mother's wine thinking it was apple juice. He tapped at Tristan's shoulder, the concern leaving his features when the other boy's eyes opened.
"Ugh, where am I?"
"On top of me, now get off!"
"Tea?"
"YES!"
"Oh...right." He took Yugi's proffered hand and stood up on his wobbly legs.
Tea peeled herself up from the floor and shook her head in an effort to clear the dizziness.
Yugi looked around curiously. "Hey, where's Ryou?"
"I'm here, what's wr-...oh my." Ryou appeared around into the kitchen and eyed the messy state of his friends. "Apparently that was one nicely timed bathroom break."
"Feel free to get off the handsome, single, struggling man whenever you want. Not that your boyfriend is standing right here or anything." We all turned at Bakura's acid comment. He was glaring daggers down at Joey...who was still sprawled on top of the fighting Kaiba.
Mokuba trotted forward and leaned down next to the blonde. "Hey Joey?" No response. "Um, you might want to wake up soon."
"Huh, wha?" He mumbled.
"You're boyfriend isn't too happy..."
"Mmmf." Was Joey's comment.
"Ugh," Seto succeeded in dislodging his face from the mop of blonde hair, "I don't care what you have to do, get him off of me! This is the second time today!"
Mokuba and Bakura exchanged looks, then each grabbed an arm and pulled with all their might. To everyone's disgust Joey whimpered in protest and clung to Seto, refusing to let go.
"GAH! Getitoffmegetitoffme!" Seto's voice was walking a fine line between the controlled outrage he wanted and screams of uncontrollable terror. It sounded vaguely like a toddler who just found a poisonous spider and it's extended family on his shirtfront.
With some more vigorous tugs Seto was finally freed. The brunette scrambled hastily to his feet and backed up to what he deemed was a safe distance from the woozy blonde.
"Um, maybe we should put him down somewhere." Mokuba suggested doubtfully. Bakura was still frowning but gave a curt nod. They disappeared into the other room, presumably to deposit Joey onto one of the couches.
"You alright Kaiba?" Ryou asked tentatively.
"Thoroughly disgusted and scarred for life, but yeah, I'm ok." Then Seto started, realizing that he wasn't talking to Mokuba, and looked quickly around the room. That comment had been way too un-Setoish for his tastes. He quickly everted his eyes and pretended nothing had happened. As far as he cared, we were invisible...Man I find it hilarious how difficult it is for Seto to keep up his cold, controlled manner when he's around us. Maybe that's why he hates us so much, heh heh.
Hmm, I might at this time point out that his shirt was in an ever sorrier state now than it was before. It had lost another button, although it was still hanging onto the shirt at the end of a long thread unraveling from the hole, and there was a nice sized rip in the right side...Yum.
Mokuba came back into the room and surveyed the mess cryptically before going to stand beside his brother.
"Seto, you're a mess. You should change you're shirt."
Silence.
With a sigh Mokuba prodded his older brother's side. Seto emerged from his reverie to look down at the boy affectionately, then back at the mess.
"Well Mokuba, I think you're going to have to work hard to beat this accident. This blows the macaroni incident clear out of the water." Seto said with a smirk.
"Tell me about it," Mokuba put his hand to his forehead in mock vexation, "not to mention the whole Emu encounter." The two smiled at each other, then Mokuba began to giggle. Seto looked confused then suddenly realized we were all watching them, Tea's jaw audibly dropped.
"OUT NOW!" Seto raged pointing towards the living room. "GET OUT!"
There was a hasty scuffle as the gang scrambled to escape the Kaiba wrath. I lingered on a chair near the doorway to eavesdrop.
"Mokuba, are you trying to embarrass me in front of people I hate?" Seto snarled.
"Of course! Now give me your shirt!"
There was a small ripping sound.
"What! HEY! Give it back!"
There were crashing noises from inside the kitchen, then suddenly a dark haired flash zoomed into the living room and made a beeline for a door nearby. Seto tore into view just behind.
"What are you doing? NO! DON'T GO IN MY BEDROOM!"
The door slammed shut.
"DON'T LOCK THE DOOR!"
The lock clicked as it slid into place.
"DON'T LEAVE ME IN HERE WITH THESE IMBECILES!"
Seto pounded on the door desperately.
"MOKUBA I'M GOING TO KILL YOU!"
No answer.
"DON'T YOU DARE LEAVE ME WITH THESE IDIOTS!" After a few seconds more of attempting to break down the door Seto slumped forward in defeat and muttered "I can't believe he left me. groan ...let alone without a shirt."
Needless to say the whole gang stared at Seto's back, totally stunned.
Well there you have it, hopefully you enjoyed it, and hopefully I'll drag my lazy butt to the computer and write some more soon, I really do miss it.