Prologue:

When I was 8 years old, my brother went away to war.

My brother Hiro was always quiet. Not in a timid way. He'd just stand there, looking at you, and he wouldn't say anything unless he felt he had to. He'd just stare at you with those piercing eyes, until you'd look away. Thats what I've heard other people say, gossiping on the streets when we passed: "Ice-Eyes". I knew Hiro could hear them too. His hearing was better than mine. All of his senses were better. But he never said anything.

I don't think his eyes are like that all. When he looks at me, they look sort of dullish. But deep inside, I know there is a cold spark, calculating and clever. Very clever. Don't you have to be clever, to be a spy?

Hiro never talked to me. Not really. Not even about our parents. Hiro never said who they were or when they died. In fact, all I know, I know from catching snatches of conversations from between my brother and some government man. I've pieced together this much: Father worked as a spy for the government. He was very good. They say he could sneak up on you without even trying, ever since he was a boy. Father had died during a mission, and so the government gave us money annually to help support us, in tribute to Father. But still, it wasn't much. Thats why Hiro made the descicion to become a spy.

Before, the officials who came yearly to give us the money always tried to encourage Hiro to join them. They knew he had inherited father's skill, the way he could slink up on you and you wouldn't know until he spoke. They were very happy when they came that year when I was 7, and he told them he would agree to work with them. Hiro was 15.

When he first went away, I was really unhappy. All my life he had been there, constantly watching, a strong shadow. I cried a little, and pouted when he had to go. But he just gave me a small hug and said coolly: "Don't cry. You're not that weak. You know how to take care of yourself."

It was true. After the first few days, I learned how to be by myself. Soon, I almost didn't care that Hiro left almost every month. I learned to go outside into the forest, to pass my time trying to catch frogs, to climb trees. Meanwhile, Hiro was progressing. At first, he had only been doing little spywork, listening out at bars to hear of any illegal actvity. Now he was doing pretty important work. Sometimes he would be gone for a whole week. Finally, the year when I turned 8, he decided to go to war. Not as a spy. He wasn't that good. As a soldier. Besides, he was of age. He had only stayed because of me. But now that I had gotten used to being alone, he decided to leave.

I didn't really understand war, back then. As I said, Hiro never really talked to me. The only world I knew was our small hut, the small field we tended for food, and the poor village we rarely went to, just to buy clothing. And the woods. Oh, the woods were my favorite place to be. I loved to watch the animals there. Hiro bought me a small wooden carving of a squirrel once. He said I was like one, because I kept climbing trees. He gave it to me the day he was leaving. I adored the toy. I thanked him for it and gave him a big hug. This time, he didn't wait there patiently till I let go. He actually hugged me back and held me to him. I should've realized something was wrong, I think now. But I was too little. Too oblivious. Too innocent. So my brother Hiro left for war, and I was left to tend to out home and the field by myself. It was allright. I didn't eat much anyway, and there were actually wild berries growing in the woods. I had lots of fun. I even camped outside in the woods.

After 3 weeks, I finally noticed that Hiro was being away for a long time. The next month, when the government men came to give the annual money, I asked them how long was a war. They looked at me, puzzled, then sad. "A long time," they said. "It may take a while. But just wait here patiently until your brother comes home." I had looked up at them, puzzled.

"But thats what I've been doing! And it has been a long time. Tell the people the war should end now." I said stubbornly. I don't know what I was thinking. I must've thought it was a game. The officers gave me the money and left. And for the next 3 months, I was without my brother. I was fed up with waiting. I was lonely. So I decided to break the unspoken law my brother had set for us. Don't talk to anyone. I knew we had a neighbor, quite a while down the road. I decided to make friends. Takaru Konure was the name of the neighbor. She was an old lady, all by herself. She was very kind to me, and she treated and felt like I was a granddaughter. When she told me so, I asked her why her real granddaughters didn't come to play. She got a sad look on her face, and then she said softly:"I don't have any granddaughters." So then I looked at her and took her hand. I showed her the wooden squirrel my brother gave me. She smiled at me and gave me some sweet potato she baked. She was a dear friend.

One day, I was out in the woods and I smelled smoke. The squirrel I was coaxing over with a nut ran away when I stood up quickly. I was scared, so I dropped my pack of camping gear and began to run full speed to the hut. As I ran, stumbling over roots and fallen twigs, I got a little angry with myself. I had gone especially deep into the forest today. And this new part of the forest I hadn't explored so well. I almost got lost, but I followed the smell of the smoke and as I sprinted across known turf, my eyes opened wide as I knew the smoke was coming from the hut. I could hear the crackling fire and people yelling. I tripped over a large branch and fell right when I came to the road, on the opposite side was our hut. I cried out but was unheard because of the shouts coming from the otherside of the road.

"DAMN YOU!! DIE!" someone shrieked and as I lifted myself up from the trench and peered out to my burning home, I saw a wiry boy throw a big stone at the hut. He, along with a lady around her forties, were standing in front of my home and were chucking bits of wood and rocks at it. I immidietly saw it was they who started the fire. I wanted to scream at them, "Yamete! Stop it!" but I kept silent because of my fear. I had never seen this kind of violence before. My eyes were wide with terror and I was shaking and sweating.

"Die! Goddamnit!" cried the boy once again and he punched the ground and turned to the woman, his mother. I could see his face and his eyes terrified me. They were filled with fire and malice.

"Okaasan! You think we can catch her?" His mother stared icily at the burning wood, then turned to him, her eyes glinting. "I hope we can. Burn the little brat! She'll suffer, he'll suffer!" She broke off, staring at the charred ash, trembling in....excitement? Hate? The boy spat on the ground, and said to her quietly, "Tousan will be avenged. Dying's not enough for the bastard who killed him. He'll suffer even more when he sees his sister joining him in hell so soon." I stared at them in fear, mounting so high in my chest I felt I should scream but I didn't dare. Everything was burning...my clothes, my items, the nest I was making for some birds, my toy squirrell Hiro gave me....I choked and spun around, running back through the woods and to Konure's.

"Takaru! Takaru! Miss Takaru Konure!" I shrieked hysterically, pounding on her door. She opened up so quickly and suddenly my fist flew forward, almost hitting her, and I would've fallen had she not caught me on the back of my brown gi. I was crying now and I looked up at her to see that her face was pale. "Sh....shh...Ami-chan-" I swatted her hand away and then grabbed it again, not sure what I wanted. "They're burning my home, Takaru! They're throwing stones at it and they want to burn someone alive!" Her eyes widened at my news and at my behavior. She grasped me tightly and brought me inside.

She got a wet towel and pressed it to my forehead, wiping away all the sweat and dirt. I squirmed. I didn't want to be here. I wanted to be somewhere far away, where I could be sure those people wouldn't get me. Takaru grasped my hand and gazed up into my eyes urgently. "Ami-chan. Who is burning your home?"

I glanced at her. She looked so frail and old. But when I saw her eyes, they were filled with emotion.

"A lady and her son. They were cursing someone...and they're angry at me. What did I do, Takaru?" The old woman's eyes filled with pain. "I don't know, Ami-chan, but you see, I am the one who told them where you lived. I didn't know, dear, I didn't know and I'm so sorry," she whispered. Then someone knocked on the door. Takaru sat up, eyes wide, and I began to tremble. She saw me shaking, and grasped my shoulders, pushing me towards the back door.

"Escape," she said harshly. "Run, get away as far as you can. Don't come back until you're sure they're gone." I nodded dumbly and rushed out the back, darting past her little field of daikons to the woods. But I was curious. I wanted to know, why are they doing this, why? So I ran along the border of the woods, rushing past her garden to a spot where I could see the front of Takaru's house. The woman and her son were standing there, and they were talking to Takaru. I almost retched, because the stench of the smoke from the burning hut was on their clothing. My home, my things, my world....

"So you don't know where she has gone," the woman said calmly, her son standing next to her with clenched fists. I saw Takaru's back stiffen.

"No, I don't." Takaru sniffed. "What have you been doing? You smell like smoke." The son glared, but the woman just shook her head. "Nothing. Let us know if you see any sign of her, alright? We're her last relatives, and as her brother has passed away in the war...." she said clearly. Takaru stiffened once more. "I see. I'll let you know." Takaru bowed slightly and shut the door in their faces. I saw the woman turn to her son. She opened her mouth to speak, but I heard no more. I turned and ran deep into the woods.

Liars! Liars, liars! ; I chanted this over and over in my head. It was night, now.

"And as her brother has passed away in the war..."

Liars!

"He'll suffer even more when he sees his sister joining him in hell so soon."

; I chanted this over and over in my head. It was night, now.

They were lying. They had to be. 'Passed away', 'joining him in hell'....

What did those words mean? Where did Hiro go? What did it mean? Passed away...Hiro went some where far, then. He couldn't've traveled all the way to Hell, though. I was confused. It didn't make any sense. Hiro can't go away forever...let alone die. He always came back. Always. Liars!

I fell asleep, but I woke up because I had rolled over onto a twig. It jabbed my side painfully, and my eyes shot open. There was no unusual noise. Just the noise of cicadas, and the rustle of leaves from the wind. I couldn't believe it happened. I needed to see, with my own eyes...

I crept through the forest, making sure not to make any loud noises. After a few minutes, I came to the remains of my home. It was gone. Every last bit. Charred wood covered the ground, ash scattered over my field. I stared a little longer from the safety of the woods, and when there was no sign of the mother and son, I crept out to the ruins. I walked carefully around the burnt wood, to the center of the ruins. Barely anything was spared. But perhaps...

It was hard to find where it was, as wood was scattered everywhere, and there were no landmarks for me to remember. But finally I found it. Where we kept our money. Hiro always put the money into a purse, then buried it in the same spot, three stones marking where it was. I had copied him, while he was away. The three stones were scattered, of course, but after digging a rather large hole with my hands and pieces of wood, I found the purse. I tugged it out, and stared. There was quite a bit. Enough to get me 2 sets of clothing and at least meals for at least a day. That was alright. I usually ate things grown in the forest, anyway.

What should I do? I asked myself. The answer came to me, quickly, from the back of my head. Leave here...

I asked myself. The answer came to me, quickly, from the back of my head.

"Leave?" I said softly, gazing at the wreckege. Tears began to come again. I growled angrily and wiped them away, not caring that I was smearing dirt on my face. Leave... The idea seemed adventurous. It grew in my mind in those few minutes. But where was my pack? I searched half-heartedly through the wreckege. As if that would alone be spared. Then I remembered. I had dropped my pack in the woods when I had smelled the smoke. I was going to go camping in those parts. I felt a lightness in my heart I hadn't felt since last morning. I ran to the unknown part of the woods. After searching for at least a quarter of an hour, I found my pack. There was a set of clothes in it, an old, worn gi and hakama, and some bread and potatoes. I almost cried in relief. This was wonderful, I could definately get going with this much provisions! I walked back to the outer part of the woods, where it met the road, when I heard a voice calling out softly. I squatted down and froze.

"Ami-chan, Ami-chan..." It was Takaru! I lept up and ran out of the woods, sprinting towards her. Takaru heard me and gave an "Oof!" as I crashed into her. She hugged me and pressed me to her, not caring I was filthy. "Oh, Ami-chan! I was afraid they had found you!" she cried.

I shook my head and pulled from her embrace, standing back, letting her look at me. She stared. My pack was slung over my shoulders, and there was dirt on my face. But I'm sure my eyes were shining. She looked at me sadly. "Are you leaving?"

I felt guilt slowly fill inside me. If I left, Takaru would be all alone again. Takaru must have seen my expression, because she gave me a smile. "You have to be careful on the road. You never know what will happen."

I smiled back. "I'll stay near the woods. I like it better there, anyway. I'll be alright." Takaru shook her head, pressin a hand to her temple as if she had a headache. "There's so much you don't know." She shook her head once more, than grasped my hand hard. "Listen to me, and remember. Be wary of strangers. They may not be who they seem. You know which plants are poisonous, and what are not?"

I nodded. "Hiro taught me." Takaru's face shone with pain for a while, and she opened her mouth to speak when I shook her gently. "What else, what else?" I said coaxingly. She paused for a second.

"Some people may try to cheat you. With money, and such. You should also carry a weapon."

My eyes went wide. A weapon? "I-I don't have one," I said worriedly. Takaru grasped my hand firmly and tugged me along. "I'll lend you a dagger I have at home. I'll give you more food as well."

We went to her house and she gave me the things she had promised. I took the dagger from it's sheath and peered at it. Takaru saw me and sighed, patting my head. "I hope you never have to use it. Are...you sure you don't want to just live here with me?"

I looked at her, and pain was tearing my heart apart. "Takaru...I just-" I don't want to be reminded. Of those people... Takaru saw and understood, as always. She nodded abruptly and showed me out to the door.

"Come back, someday. I want to see what you look like, grown." she said softly. I nodded. I gave her a hug and thanked her for everything. I was about to turn away and start my journey, when I remembered something.

"Takaru? When Hiro comes back, you'll let him know what happened and that I'll be alright?"

She opened her mouth to speak but I cried out a loud, "Thank you!" and ran off. I didn't want to hear it. Surely she didn't believe those liars?

Its funny who traveling on the road makes you think. After a while, your legs seem to move automatically and your mind is free to wander. I kept finding myself thinking about the lady and her son, even though I wanted to forget. A question kept probing me. Why? Then I remembered something the son had said. It made my blood run cold.

"Tousan will be avenged. Dying's not enough for the bastard who killed him."

'Tousan will be avenged' ........ 'bastard who killed him'

My heart could have stopped. 'Bastard who killed him'... He was killed. By whom? That sentence rang out in my head and I blinked back tears, trying to avoid the answer to the question, the question of whom they were talking about. But I couldn't avoid it. The truth rang out in my heart and my steps became heavier as the light of dawn lighted the horizon.

When I was 8 years old, my brother went to war. And he killed someone.

Owari-

Okaasan- mother

Yamete- stop

(I got those words from the dictionary. If they're wrong, ah well. ;)