"Kissed a Boy" (part 1 of 'My Brave Wendy')
by Isabelle
Disclaimers: The rights to the film and book "Peter Pan/Peter Pan and Wendy" do not belong to me, this is just done for entertainment. Chapter Disclaimers: The song "Are you Happy Now" belong entirely to Michelle Branch.
Rating: PG-15 (for adult themes and mild sexual references)
Feedback: [email protected]
Archiving: It's a requirement that I have that you ask me before posting any of my written work. Thank you.
Summary: This is a work of fiction based on the 2003 film "Peter Pan", it is centered, like the film around Peter & Wendy's relationship, just so you know. Basically the whole "never saw each other again" is out the window and for the purposes of the fiction they did.
Setting: This happens 1 year after Peter last saw Wendy, she's now been sent to a boarding school in Switzerland with her parent's new found fortune, but it's nothing like the place they thought it to be, as WWI is in it's starting stages there's fear all around and she's left without adult supervision along with some of her boarding school girls to find a way home and hoping that a certain first love will find her.
Spoilers: The film, it'll spoil you if you have not seen the film!!
-----------------------
Could you look me in the eyes
And tell me that your happy now
Would you tell it to my face or have I been erased
Are you happy now?
Yes, it was warm but it was not home. It was soft and inviting but it had nothing but memories lost in the great winds. There was not grand window were she could appraise the sky... or look for him.
Her mother had told her that when her John and Michael had gone they were gone for months, while it was only days for her. That must mean for him, it had only been a short while meanwhile she had waited 378 days for his return and all that was in the sky was the soft floating forms of snowflakes as they made love to the wind, floating back and forth until they landed in perfect unison in the snow-covered floor.
It was beautiful to watch, almost like watching the Fairy King and Queen dance underneath the enchanted tree. Life had been good at that moment, she mused. Life had definitely been good.
She no longer considered herself a little girl, like she had once proclaimed because, she understood, when a child lets themselves feel certain emotions one cannot ever feel once more like a child. Adulthood took you like a hook in the night, yanking you out the state of happy limbo and thrusting you into a world which was cold, unsure and above all... alone.
Wendy never would've considered herself to feel alone. Ever. How could she, she had eight brothers! But here, in the bittersweet warmth of her bed in her new Boarding School she was utterly alone. So alone. And no one. Not even Peter would come to neither rescue her or keep her company.
He was gone and sadly, at that moment she accepted it. He wouldn't have been happy with her anyways, to be with her he would've needed to grow up or at least to admit to himself that he had grown up, for he seemed to her very much an adult... especially after she had kissed him. There was a look to his eye that had not been there before, and the way he looked at her was... different.
She supposed she was too young to understand exactly what had happened, but one thing was certain and that certainty she would hold until her dying day... for a moment, he had loved her.
--------------------
You took all there was to take
And left me with an empty plate
And you don't care about it
He had counted her absence with gold leaves that reminded him of her hair, he had set them up next to his bed carefully collecting them daily, staring at them until he could remember exactly what her hair looked like.
Often he had found the leaves messy and out of order, he knew it was Tinkerbell who had done it. She hated the leaves and hated everything in the tree house that reminded Peter of Wendy.
Like Wendy's house, which he had brought to the Tree House, placed it next to his bed, keeping it tidy and walking in once in a while to smell her in there. It smelled like Lavender and Spring, Wendy smell.
When he had collected 34 leaves he noticed something... unexpected. As he called for Tinkerbell his voice did something funny. It sounded... deep. Like a man. The sound had frightened him so much that he tried to drown himself and it only resulted in being pulled back by the Fairies.
When the leaves were 42, another incident happened that almost drove him mad. He noticed that there were hairs... hairs growing in places where they had not grown before. Under his arms... and between his legs. Loads of them and quickly.
He had cried that night and there had been no angel to console like the last time he cried. He would suffer through 100 needles if it meant Wendy would fix it all with her needle and her thread.
It was at leaf 53 that he decided he could no longer bear it and there was no denying it... he was becoming a man. And he hated it, no matter how much he tried to clear his throat his voice remained deep, cracking only once in a while... he needed to make it better and knew that the only way to have Wendy with him, if she was there with him the hairs would go away and the voice would not crack and they'd laugh and pretend and it would be wonderful!
So that night, he told Tink to come... he was going back for his Wendy. She had protested at first but soon resigned and followed him obediently behind.
----------------------------------
And I am giving up this game
And leaving you with all the blame
Cause I don't care
To say she had made friends in the school would've been a lie and thought she had begun to see how dark it was to be an adult she could not bring herself to lie.
She had no friends and the girls all made fun of her while her back was turned, they talked about what a tom-boy she was, always excelling at the sports, reading books with pirates and Indians, wearing uniforms not as finely made as theirs and receiving so many letters from so many brothers.
Mrs. Swans, a strict old woman who was a hated prune by all the girls decided to give them girls assigned seats to prevent the chatter that usually arose in her class. There were tables, which seated six girls and she placed random girls together.
Wendy, to her horror, was placed with Anna Pavlovia, the snottiest creature she had ever beheld-- she was proud of her shinny black curls that hung down her mid back, and often she had been in the opposing end of her cool crystalline blue eyes that shinned with mischief and power. Often did she state that her father, Prince Pavlovia, had sent her as a present (which usually consisted of silks, fine chocolates from Paris or the latest and most fashionable beauty products which were allowed to 13 year old girls) With her was Helen Waterford, daughter of an English Duke, something she never failed to mention in a conversation, who received similar presents from her mother, Lady Waterford who often spent her days in Paris while her father was busy with matters of the state. Rachael Dimitri and Rosalind Luther both followed Anna and Helen's every step, in at most admiration though they themselves were from very old money which was what kept them in the inner circle of Pavlovia.
The only other person in her table which she might have considered of some company was Joanna Collins, her shyness had always pleased Wendy, knowing that there must be much more to the girl than what she let on but the shyness was so extreme that she would flee every time Wendy tried to speak to her.
While Wendy, diligently did her school work and tried to ignore the chattering going on with the girls at the table it could no longer be ignored when Mrs. Swans stepped out. Anna turned to the girls and smiled bright, her blue eyes sparkling. "He has written to me!"
Helen and Rosalind squealed in delight.
"What did it say," demanded Rachael.
"It's perfectly wonderful!" cried Helen. "I wish I had a boy of my own."
The word 'boy' made Wendy's head snap up, her eyes wide with interest.
Anna caught her look. "Ever heard of a boy, Wendy? Do they have them in Cheapstreet?"
The girls giggled with jollity. "How horrid it must be to live in such a degrading place!" Helen cried.
Wendy's face turned bright red and she very much would've like to state what her opinion was of them and what their opinions about her family meant to her... but she didn't.
She smirked and straightened up. "I've actually kissed a boy." She stated calmly.
The chatter stopped in the entire room, all eyes turned to her, wide and surprised. Helen's smile faded, both Rachael and Rosalind gapped at Wendy, Anna's face burnt red with anger, and even the shy Joanna's head snapped up to look at her.
Wendy's mouth went dry.
"Have you?" Anna said, a slight mocking smile in her lips, she tossed back one shiny ebony curl, her pale hand settling underneath her chin in fake-keen interest. "Tell me, what was his name?"
Wendy looked quickly to them all, her palms were sweaty and her stomach doing jumps. "He... his name was Peter. Peter Pan."
The girls burst out laughing, clutching their stomachs with glee.
"Peter Pan!" cried Helen. "What a joke!"
Wendy burned inside with anger.
"He sounds horribly wild and unkempt," one of them said and Wendy couldn't help but wish that Peter would drop, right now from the ceiling and prove them all right which would only send them about screaming in fright and would have Wendy, in turn, laughing with mirth.
"I'll tell you how it felt!" she said, loudly.
Once again the laughing stopped and they all turned to look at her. Unexpected was what would describe what their eyes told, which made Wendy smile.
"His hair is golden like the sun as it sets, his skin is bronzed like Autumn leaves when they are freshly fallen and his eyes..." she closed hers. "His eyes are so very blue like the ocean after a storm. His lips give you a smile that melts you..." she opened her eyes and looked at them. "When I kissed him his eyes were closed. And when you've finally kissed someone you'll know that his lips will mold to yours and you'll feel the air coming from his nose, softly tingling your cheeks and for just a moment... just a moment. You are one. You are his and he is yours." She smiled. "A kiss... it's a powerful thing."
All of them were gaping her, some flushed, other stunned.
Moments of silence passed until she looked down.
"What a little liar you are, Wendy," Anna told her, calmly. Her hand no longer under her chin but with her hand raised, Mrs. Swans chose that moment to come back into the classroom, the girls looked back down to their studies, hushing into silence, all but Wendy and Anna who stared at each other.
"Yes, what is Miss. Pavlovia?" Mrs. Swans asked in annoyance.
Anna smiled, angelically. "While you were gone, Mrs. Swans, Wendy Darling decided to tell us a horrible lie about how she kissed a boy... and liked it."
Mrs. Swans' body went ridge as did Wendy's, the old woman snapped to look at Wendy, her wrinkled eyes narrowing dangerously.
"So, you enjoy telling lies, Miss. Darling?"
Wendy went pale and flushed at the same time as a mixture of emotions crawled through her body. "I was... it was not a lie!" she cried.
"Ahhh, I see." the woman said stiffly. "Come up here, Miss. Darling."
Wendy glanced at Anna and the other girls who were holding in their laugher. Tears swelled to her eyes but she held them back, she would not cry. She would not cry.
"Hold out your hand, Miss. Darling." the woman said, walking around the desk.
Wendy's eyes went wide, her body wanting to run as far as possible, as far away from here as she could go. The faces of her father and mother, so proud to finally be able to send her to a high-standing school were she would be properly educated... what would they say when they found her in their doorsteps? Ashamed, disappointed... it was all too much.
Meekly she held out her right hand, Mrs. Swans walked to her with a thin wooden stick in her hand and grasped her hand, palm side up. Raised the stick and brought it down swiftly on Wendy's palm.
Wendy gasped, tears of pain no longer holding in as she pulled her bruised hand against her chest. "Next lie will get you two fine lines and a letter to your dear parents. Am I understood?"
Misery took over her, wanting to scream that it had not been a lie. Wanting to grab the awful stick and hit her with it after she hit Anna.
"Y-yes, ma'am." she said quietly, sniffling, trying to hold in the sobs that were momentarily about to escape.
"You may go to your quarters," the woman told her, walking back to her desk. "Take your things and I want you to do four paragraphs instead of two on the Rise of the Habsburg empire."
Wendy nearly ran to her seat, grabbing all of her things without looking at anyone in the room and dashed off to her room, her bed.
When she was safe from prying and interested eyes she hid underneath the covers and sobbed her heart out... wondering if indeed kissing Peter had been a lie. All a lie and as unreal as the pain in her hand.
Do you really have everything you want
You could never give something you ain't got
You can't run away from yourself
Could you look me in the eyes and tell me that your happy now
Come on tell it to my face or have I been replaced
-----------------------
TBC....
A/N: Yes, I write angsty and I update about once a week. My story as you saw does cover more mature subjects and I suggest you be 15 years old to read this.
