Dégager: The Saiyajin Pet

By Orchideater

AU, Gk x Vg

Rated R for some explicit sexuality

DBZ and all DBZ characters property of Akira Toriyama and official licensees

A/N (deep breath) Okay, this is it! I hope you enjoy the ending.

---

Chapter 10: Dégager

In the dining hall of his mansion, Vegeta entertained dinner guests, as he'd done for the past four hours, and endured an excruciating wait. He pretended to listen to the conversation, pretended to be interested, and gave noncommittal answers and comments, but his mind was preoccupied with the events supposedly occurring across town.

Had he done it? Had he arrived back? Had everything gone as planned? Every nerve buzzed with excitement, with the thrill of taking this terrible chance. Though his outward appearance betrayed nothing, anxious, nervous energy weighed down every cell. Vegeta relished it, though. Playing dangerous war games to get what he wanted always set fire to his blood.

Don't let me down, Kakarot...

Finally, as guests sipped their after-dinner drinks and servants removed empty dessert plates, one of the maids entered and approached him, distressed. She bent down and whispered in his ear, "Sir, the police are here. They say they want to ask you some questions."

Vegeta turned toward the direction she indicated and could see several officers waiting at the door of the dining room. A ball of passion shot down his spine.

He did it. He actually did it! The saiyajin killed for me...

It took all of Vegeta's willpower to prevent a ferocious grin from overtaking his face. He graciously excused himself and joined the investigators out in the hallway.

The man in charge greeted him. "Mr. Oujisama, we're sorry to interrupt your evening plans, but we'd–"

"You bastard! Killer! Monster!" Buruma burst to the front and tried to fight her way to Vegeta, but an officer held her back. As he expected, she placed the blame squarely upon him.

Go ahead my dear, it's your word against mine, he thought, casting her a supremely indifferent look.

"What the hell are you going on about, woman? What's this all about?"

"Ms. Briefs' lover was killed this evening under strange circumstances, and she seems convinced that you had something to do with it. Can you spare us a few minutes to answer our questions?"

"Of course, let's go to the drawing room."

Vegeta answered every query calmly, rationally, and with ease, feeling like a student who had studied hard and now had the satisfaction of acing the test. He had an airtight alibi, and twenty witnesses to confirm that he had been at home during the time of the death.

"These claims are outrageous. Search my entire house if you like, question my staff. My wife is completely paranoid, to the point where I've begun to wonder if she's been taking drugs. I refuse to give her a divorce because I still have hopes of repairing our relationship, and so out of frustration she blames me for everything going wrong in her life."

"You argued the morning of the murder?"

"Yes, bitterly, but I made none of the death threats of which she's accusing me. We argued about our relationship, nothing more."

The dinner guests were questioned and dismissed, as well as several of the servants. Vegeta guided the troop of officers from room to room, allowing them to perform a formal search and do whatever else they found necessary.

Hours later, as the last room was searched, the lead investigator wearily made one final request. "May we check the greenhouse sir? One of the killing slashes has identifying marks that could possibly indicate an animal attack."

"Yes, he's been keeping something in there!" Buruma cut in. "I could feel it. I could feel its eyes on me when I was there last month!"

Vegeta gave her a frown of concern. "My god, now you're hallucinating. I really wish you'd see a professional about these delusions; I'm worried about you."

An officer swiftly stepped in to prevent Buruma from flying into a screaming rage, and the group then marched down to the greenhouse. Vegeta went in first and held the door open for them, speaking loudly.

"As you can see, the only animals in here are birds, butterflies, and insects. What else does one keep in a greenhouse, anyway?"

As the officers fanned out, the head investigator almost stumbled over a wild-haired young man sitting on the floor against the wall, with legs drawn up and arms around his knees. He looked at the inspector blankly.

"Who's this?"

"Oh, that's just my greenhouse keeper, Kakarot." Vegeta walked over and placed a hand on his head as Kakarot shrank behind him to escape the stranger's gaze. "He's mute and very shy, very nervous around people. He likes to sleep here alone." Vegeta explained to them the rest of the story he had concocted to explain Kakarot's human origin.

"If Buruma heard or felt anything in here that day, it was Kakarot hiding from her, not some imaginary killer animal."

The lead investigator scrutinized him. The man seemed timid, almost fearful of all the activity and the presence of strangers. The huge oversized T-shirt effectively downplayed his build and made him seem almost childish, as did the smooth face and rumpled hair. Those limpid, doe-like eyes held nothing to fear.

"I'm assuming he's not an illegal alien or a runaway. You have the papers to prove it?"

"Certainly. I have the papers in my desk drawer, if you'd like to see them." The fake papers he'd had made up weeks ago, that is.

"No, that's not necessary." The inspector then turned his attention away and focused fully on the rest of the surroundings.

Buruma stared at Kakarot and their eyes met. Could it really have just been him, that day? Maybe she had overreacted. She had felt so sure of danger, though, and those golden eyes in the shadows...

She turned away, still suspicious, though doubts had begun to creep in. As soon as no one was watching Kakarot's timid look instantly became a death glare piercing her back.

Vegeta placed a hand on his shoulder and smiled down at him in a fatherly manner. "So, how has your evening been? Going well?" he asked.

Kakarot nodded slowly, and sent him the answer he really wanted to hear. :: I did all that you asked, Vegeta. The hunt went well; he was not a bad opponent, for a human. I was not seen, I razed the area and shielded myself so not a trace of my presence was left, and I came back here and waited for you like this. Th-this is what you wanted, right, Vegeta? Did I do all right? ::

Vegeta smiled cheerily and patted his shoulder. "That's good."

He then left Kakarot's side and strolled after the roaming officers. The sandy-haired officer caught up with him, and asked if he could have a few words.

"Just out of curiosity, sir, did you ever buy anything from a man called Count D?"

Vegeta lost his composure for only a moment. "Actually, yes, around two months ago."

"You did? What was it?"

"Several tropical birds. Quite a beautiful addition to the greenhouse."

"Could I see these birds?"

Vegeta clapped his hands noisily and the already agitated birds flew up and circled the ceiling.

"Those five over... there are what I bought," he said, pointing. "Is there a problem?"

"Err..." Orcot stared at the birds and tried to find anything unusual about them besides their bright colors. "Have they given you any sort of trouble? Did Count D give you any sort of list of dos and don'ts for them?"

"He gave me instructions on their care and feeding, and other than the droppings they give me no trouble at all. Just what are you getting at?" he responded stiffly, glaring.

Orcot opened his mouth to respond but was cut off by another officer.

"Ha ha! Better watch out, Orcot, or one of those birds will swoop down and slice you in half! Sorry sir, Orcot thinks Count D is to blame for every weird death we get around here."

"Shut up, smartass! You'll be apologizing to me one day."

The other officer continued snickering, and Orcot stomped off, leaving Vegeta a bit rankled but still undaunted.

Finally the police finished their search, and had nothing left to ask him anymore. The lead investigator thanked him for his cooperation and tolerance and said they would be in touch if there were any new developments.

"You're not going to do anything?!" Buruma wailed.

"Well, the love triangle aspect of your relationship gives him a motive, but we don't have a shred of hard evidence to link Mr. Oujisama to the crime, only your accusation. Frankly we've got nothing at all, only a bizarre modus operandi and strange natural phenomena that we don't know how to explain."

"Aren't you at least going to take him to the station?!"

The lead investigator dropped his voice and stepped closer to speak privately to her. "As you already know, Oujisama is a very powerful man. There's only so much we can do in these cases, and he's cooperated fully with us. He'll be kept under suspicion and unable to leave the country for a time, but that's all we can do. We can't jail and convict someone based on women's intuition. I'm sorry, ma'am. All we can hope is for forensics to give us a lead, or a witness to come forward."

Buruma wilted in despair.

Vegeta ushered the police out when they were finished and pulled her aside as they walked up the grassy hill to the cars.

"I'm very sorry for the pain you must be feeling right now. He shouldn't have been walking in such a dangerous area at night."

Buruma stared straight ahead, her eyes dead. "The last thing I want to hear is your phoney sympathy, you heartless monster. We both know it was you."

"Ridiculous. I've been here the whole night."

"Because you'd never get your own hands dirty. I don't know how you managed this, but I know it was you."

"I prefer to think of it as fate telling you to come back to me. If you continue to defy fate, who knows what else might happen?"

"How can you possibly think I could love you after what you've done?"

"I don't. I've given up such soft emotions." He jerked her close and sneered in her ear. "I have a new philosophy: 'It is better to be feared than loved.' You're an intelligent woman. I assume you'll be home by the end of this week."

Buruma covered her face with her hands, and fell silent for long moments before rasping a tiny reply: "I'll think about it." She pulled away from him and walked quickly to the squad car she'd come in, and took refuge in the backseat.

Vegeta smoothly said his goodbyes to the police force and watched from the front doorway until every squad car had wound its way down the long driveway and disappeared, and he was left alone under the stars.

A cold, stimulating wave of twisted satisfaction wriggled through his insides. He– had– done it. He had actually gotten away with murder. The police were fools groping in the dark– they had nothing on him, nothing, and didn't even have the slightest idea of what really happened. He knew they suspected him, especially that hothead Orcot, but without evidence they couldn't touch a hair on his head.

He felt invincible, all-powerful, as if he could do anything. Nothing stood in his way. He could crush enemies and forge paths by fear alone, and no one would dare cross him again.

He had fallen astray for a few months, and had opened himself to base and traitorous feelings that weakened him in both spirit and mind. Now, with this act of bloodshed, he remembered everything that had almost been pushed aside– his priorities, and his identity. He became reacquainted with his first love, that nasty and fickle but dangerously intoxicating little demon named Power.

Power was all. Everyone sought it, grabbing for what little pieces they could find. But he, Vegeta Oujisama, had the power of a king. He gloried in the feeling sweeping through his being, that feeling of unbridled, uninhibited authority. It was all he needed. Who needed love when you could have power? Power brought wealth, and wealth could buy you all the love you needed. In power was control, and in control, security.

Love and concern for others only weakened one. The fragile, budding love for Kakarot had made him an unstable, emasculated mess, but intimidation and control made him strong.

Any fear he still held for the saiyajin evaporated. Kakarot was truly under his control; he would do anything for his master, even kill.

Vegeta held his sides, tilting his head up to the heavens, grinning ecstatically. He wanted to break into wild laughter. What could compare? What could compare to this glorious feeling?

He almost skipped down the hill to the greenhouse and flung the door open with a loud bang, full of blood and thunder.

"Kakarot! Did you see that? Did you SEE that?! The police are gone. They have nothing on me, I mean nothing!"

As soon as he saw Vegeta was alone, Kakarot instantly whipped the shirt off over his head and returned to his more animalistic form. Vegeta strode up and grabbed his shoulders, shaking him back and forth.

"Brilliant! You brilliant beast! I knew you could do it, could do on the first time what a seasoned veteran couldn't. Ha-ha!"

He gave him a sharp, excited slap on the cheek that made Kakarot jump in surprise, then began pacing wildly to make use of his manic energy. Kakarot watched in shock, partly amused by his friend's behavior.

"Oh god... They have no idea... We put one over on the police, we actually got away with MURDER... It was so perfect. Oh god, I wish I could have seen pretty boy's face."

:: You are pleased, then? ::

"Pleased? Oh lord, Kakarot, I'm more than pleased, I– God, I feel like– God! I don't think I've ever felt so high. It's unbelievable. Just beautiful. Ha ha ha!"

:: V... Vegeta. :: Kakarot tried to hold his attention as he paced almost frantically, circling him like a deranged shark. :: Am I forgiven for... you know... ::

"Huh? Oh yes, yes, that's all done. But I don't want you trying anything like that ever again, you understand? I'm through with all that silliness, and if you want us to remain friends you'd better get that through your skull."

:: Um... But... I know the timing was wrong... But... But... ::

"You know, one of those cops seemed to know your old master," Vegeta said, not listening. "That crazy shopkeeper must make a habit of selling bizarre and dangerous creatures that no one else can find; I wonder what else I could buy from him?"

:: Um... V-Vegeta... ::

Vegeta's thoughts darted back to what the officer had asked him. Did Count D give you any sort of list of dos and don'ts?

What was that list of rules the shopkeeper had given him about Kakarot, again? How to feed him, house him, exercise him... and that strange rule about keeping covered in his presence. Vegeta suddenly felt ridiculous, standing there in his high-collared, long-sleeved, button-down black shirt and black leather pants. All those people here tonight– in Kakarot's territory no less– with collars open and sleeves rolled up, and Kakarot only sat quietly in the corner watching. The partygoers, the maid, Buruma– he had been around all these people who had bare arms, necks, shoulders, legs, and he had not acted viciously.

Damn that mincing little shit, he'd been jerking him around the whole time and made a joke of him! Vegeta had been nervous around the creature at first and followed that rule carefully, but then it became such a force of habit that he barely thought about the why of it anymore.

He would not be a fool for anyone, anymore.

Vegeta stopped twenty feet away and faced off against the saiyajin, staring him down, his stance tall and firm. His face took on a sneer of supreme arrogance.

"You would do anything for me, wouldn't you, Kakarot?"

The saiyajin nodded solemnly.

"Such a good beast. Hah! You know what?" he taunted. "I'm not afraid of you anymore. Not afraid of anything."

Kakarot's eyes widened in disbelief as Vegeta began pulling at the buttons of his collar. "You want to bite me? Go right ahead. I can take it!"

In one brisk motion he tore the shirt open wide, baring the whole of his torso.

"Come on! Take your pound of flesh, you great gorgeous bastard! Ha ha ha!"

Vegeta didn't see him leap– didn't see his face contort in a rictus of savage glee– only felt the saiyajin slam into him, take him to the ground, and sink his sharp canines deep into the soft flesh of his neck.

The world stopped. Vegeta felt silence buzz in his ears as Kakarot held him deathly tight, his teeth locked in place, their unmoving figures portraying a twisted pietà. Kakarot ripped the shirt in two and pulled the remnants from him.

"Ahh... ah-ahhh... ah!" Vegeta moaned in pain as the teeth pressed in farther, relaxed slightly, then pressed in again. A thin stream of blood trickled down, staining the ground scarlet.

He never believed he'd do it. Never thought in a million years that he would actually do it. He'd meant only to flash the saiyajin for a brief second, to tease him, then they would have laughed and had a victory dinner. Yet amidst the confusion and pain, he felt a wash of relieved fulfillment eclipsing the sense of betrayal. Why did this feel so right? Ahhhh...

"Kkkghh... Kakarot... Why... why are you... AHHH!"

The pain increased a hundredfold. Kakarot clutched the back of his head, supported his back with a tightly coiled arm, and wound his tail around Vegeta's waist to steady him.

White fire raced through his veins, accompanied by a hellish pain that filled every fiber, every cell, gnashing down his spine and spreading outwards to even his fingertips and toes. He recognized that agonizing fire as Kakarot's ki, the energy that had felt so warm and gentle when it fell down like rain.

Kakarot was tearing him apart from the inside. That bright power took hold of his limbs and filled them, prodding and molding from within; stretched his bones and spine till he feared they would be pulled out; shredded and reformed the very building blocks of his life. His skin burned and crawled as from a hundred thousand tiny, swarming spiders' feet.

"Hrrrr..."

Kakarot loosened his jaws slightly, releasing a rattling growl, then clamped down harder than ever in fervor, making Vegeta jerk and gasp. A blazing halo of power erupted around them both, sending a rolling shockwave outward that shattered every pane of glass in the greenhouse with explosive force. The clamoring birds flew out into the night sky, never to return.

The nimbus of power arced upwards and away from Kakarot, plummeting downward into Vegeta's body.

Vegeta felt death reaching for him. How much more pain could he bear?

As quickly as it had come, the pain stilled and dissipated, leaving behind a pleasant calm. The storm was over. He could only hear his own labored breathing, and the pounding of his heart. Returning senses seemed sharper, and scents more acute.

He felt his spirit calm and strengthen, solidifying into a new state of mind, a new consciousness.

The mansion, his riches, and his name, all that he had once considered of consummate importance, meant nothing to him now. He no longer had need for status and place, or materialistic egoism to mask insecurity and vulnerability. All such frivolous needs and wants bled out of his being till they seemed only the foolish, ghostlike memories of an ill-spent childhood. He could see everything so clearly now.

He had been a fool.

The jungle beckoned him, overpowering all the feeble posturing of Man. Aligned with its call, with the bond of a mate who loved him in the deepest sharing he'd ever known, he felt at peace.

Kakarot slowly released his neck, and pulled back. Vegeta reached up with a shaky hand to touch the torn flesh, and felt only saliva– the wound had closed already. He cracked his eyes open and saw Kakarot gazing down at him in reverence, smiling broadly.

:: Vegeta... My Chosen. You are so beautiful... even more now than before. ::

Vegeta caught a glimpse of himself reflected in the saiyajin's shining eyes– saw with disbelief a figure with long, shagged hair and a red pelt...

Kakarot stroked Vegeta's face, thumbed his lips gently as wide green eyes stared up in shock.

:: I... Uh...? ::

Kakarot suddenly drew close till their noses touched, and Vegeta blushed. :: You have some strange courtship rituals, my friend, but you were worth the wait. ::

He claimed Vegeta's lips in a hard-earned kiss of celebration, savoring the sweet taste of his new mate, the other half of his heart. Vegeta's new tail reflexively twined with his.

He pulled Vegeta up with him to his feet and Vegeta wobbled, unused to the larger body and five extra inches of height.

:: Come on, Vegeta! It's time for us to go. ::

:: Where are we going? ::

Kakarot turned and flashed him a knowing grin. :: Home.::

Vegeta returned the smile, unsure of their future but bolstered by an unwavering trust. Hand in hand they stepped out of the ruined greenhouse and ran toward the forest, disappearing into the misty darkness.

---

Epilogue

A beautiful morning graced Chinatown, fresh with the promise of summer. The admirable weather did nothing to improve the mood of Officer Orcot, however, as he trudged up to the unassuming storefront and descended the stairs into the welcome shade of the pet shop's foyer. Count D greeted him coolly.

"Ah, detective, it's you again."

"Yeah, it's me. I want to ask you some questions."

"I'm terribly sorry, but I simply don't have the time to entertain you today. Several of my animals are sick, Honlon is cranky, not to mention I've been feeling a bit peaked myself lately–"

Orcot grudgingly held out his goodwill offering.

"Aiieee! Neuhaus Masterpiece Collection chocolates! Come in, I'll tell you whatever you want!" D drug him inside the den with surprising strength and immediately dashed off to set out his teatime paraphernalia.

Orcot had to smile. He could always depend on the Count's weakness for sweets to get him the information he wanted. D preferred for them both to be properly seated and served before a discussion, so he waited impatiently until the Count began to pour the tea.

"This time I've got a murder and a disappearance, as if one wasn't bad enough," he began. "A corporate fat cat named Vegeta Oujisama disappeared two days ago, on the same day he was connected in suspicion to a crazy murder that's got forensics baffled. Yamcha Rengetsu was the victim, a bailiff. I didn't know him, but he attended the same police academy as me, so that makes this personal. We cops get very pissed off when one of our own goes down. Not to mention that we've got Oujisama's raging father on our asses demanding we find him– he thinks the police are supposed to drop everything else and put every man out looking for his son." Orcot paused briefly to pull out his pack of cigarettes and shoot a glare at the Count.

"I questioned the son himself that night and guess what? He was a customer of yours– said he bought birds. What the hell did you sell him, a werechicken?"

"Ah, yes, the very difficult and very rude Mr. Oujisama." The Count smiled fondly at the memory. "Heh. It certainly took them long enough; he must have been quite resistant. I did sell him some birds, but our main contract was for a saiyajin. That is the creature that killed the hapless Mr. Rengetsu."

"A what?"

D pulled out a leatherbound sketchbook and flipped to a marked page displaying a fanciful drawing of Kakarot, done in the stylized fashion of classical Far Eastern art.

"Quite good, don't you think?" he said, handing the book to Orcot. "I was completely unfamiliar with the species before he came to me, so I made my own notes and reference drawings about him."

"What the hell is this, a yeti?"

"Oh my, no. Yetis live in the mountains and are quite smelly, dull, and antisocial. He is a saiyajin, one of only a handful left of his kind. His name is Kakarot."

"Kakarot? That was the name of that quiet guy in the greenhouse!" Orcot jumped up in excitement. "The greenhouse keeper did it! I have to go find him and arrest him–"

"Sit down, detective, Kakarot is long gone. I estimate they are already close to a hundred miles on their way to the southern jungles by now."

"What? What are you saying, is Vegeta Oujisama, Jr. still alive?"

"Of course. They are traveling together. Kakarot has taken him as mate, and they now share an eternal bond of spirit and flesh."

"Mates?! But... but they're two guys!"

Count D cast him a look of long-suffering annoyance and sighed. "You are terribly small-minded as usual, detective. You have been entrenched in your own beliefs for so long you forget the alternatives. Many cultures consider same sex love the norm. If you'd open your eyes you'd find that the inclination is... more common than you might think." The count batted his eyelashes at Orcot and sipped his tea coyly.

Red splotches covered Orcot's cheeks. "Ugh... O-Okay... So they ran off together. But... but come on, you're not telling me the whole story here! How did this happen? What... And the murder... That thing is dangerous!"

"You need not worry. Kakarot and his partner will never return to our world." The Count settled in to tell his tale.

"Kakarot had reached full maturity for his kind– 50 years of age– and felt the desire to find a mate. He sent out a psychic call for the one that would be his soul's mate, left home and followed the faint answering call that returned to him, like a dolphin's sonar. Guided only by his senses he traveled thousands of miles north, finally focusing in on this city. But he needed help arranging a proper meeting. He discerned my, shall we say, unique ki signature and sought me out as one who could help him.

"I was thrilled to learn of the existence of such a magnificent creature, not to mention flattered that he should seek my help, of all people's, and I determined to help him in any way I could. By mental touch he shared with me the vague images and general description of the one he sought. I had an idea of who he referred to, and politely asked a customer of mine who worked with Oujisama if he might discreetly mention my store while within hearing range of the man," D said, rather smug at his own cleverness.

"Vegeta, already feeling a pull he couldn't understand, now knew where to follow the pull to. When Oujisama found his way to my store and made his particular request, I knew he was the one. I introduced them, and the courtship began."

"Courtship?" Orcot imagined a 19th century couple riding in a horse and buggy and the man "coming to call" on the blushing lady.

"Whatever you're thinking, I can guarantee that's not it," the Count said dryly. "Traditional saiyajin customs are very unusual– in fact, different from anything I've seen. The courtship began when Vegeta agreed to take Kakarot home. This meant he approved of the suitor and gave permission to be courted. During the formal meeting and duration of the courtship, custom calls for the desired to cover his or her body completely, except for the head and hands. Revealing of the forbidden flesh signals to the courting saiyajin that courtship is over and the desired is ready to be bonded and mated, and the exposed flesh is bitten to seal the bond.

"During courtship the pursuer is not allowed to touch the desired in any overtly sexual manner, not allowed to voice his wants. The pursuer is sometimes given difficult tasks to perform to prove his love and loyalty, and mates are often taken on the full moon. Although Vegeta sent Kakarot after Yamcha for his own selfish ends, I believe a deeper part of him was instinctively acting out the rituals of the saiyajin. Vegeta knew what he truly wanted in his unconscious and let it guide his actions, though he believed the denials the rest of his mind kept exhorting.

"I think Kakarot assumed I had explained to Vegeta the rules of the game. Silly me!" D tittered.

"Aagh, he was in the dark the entire time? Count, you're terrible! If you didn't like this guy and wanted Kakarot to take him in the first place, why'd you even give him that third rule to follow? You could've just let the creature take him."

"How boring! I thought they should have some time to get acquainted. Though it did take longer than I expected. I knew Vegeta Oujisama was a rigid creature of habit, but I also knew that he was not the type of person who could follow another man's rules for long."

"Vegeta was on the verge of completely succumbing to his vices, but fortunately in the midst of it all instinct directed him, and Kakarot gave him that forceful push in the right direction that he needed."

"Urgh, so Vegeta Oujisama lost his free will and became this saychin's love slave? How awful."

"Don't be an imbecile. He is no such thing. In fact Vegeta is more free than he ever was in his life, more free than most of us could hope to be. Though they came from different worlds, they were kindred spirits. The kis of Vegeta and Kakarot matched perfectly, like two strings that when plucked produce the same notes that melt into one. They would have joined no matter what, despite cultural misunderstandings and Vegeta's conflicted state of mind. Kakarot shared his power with Vegeta, his spirit, his mind, and when Vegeta saw reality through the consciousness of the saiyajin, the petty concerns and worries of his bitter life melted away. He was shown the right path."

"So happily ever after, and all that? A man is dead!" Orcot snarled. "Oh wait, I forgot, you don't care about humans," he added sarcastically.

"The death was regrettable, I admit. But is it not the highest duty of an officer to sacrifice himself for others? He died quickly, honorably, while he was loved and in the prime of life. He will never grow old and ill, and his love with Buruma will never sour. She will remember him forever as the great, untainted love of her life. Not an entirely awful way to go."

"Rrrr... that's it! I'm arresting you!"

"On what charges?"

"Violation of the Washington Convention, and if that doesn't work we'll try slave trade!"

"Oh, stop being so dramatic. I'm familiar with the tenets of the Washington Convention. Which is a moot point at any rate since I sold Vegeta nothing but ordinary birds."

"You crazy liar, you just said– Where's that contract you made with Oujisama, I know you have one!"

D calmly went to his desk and pulled out a parchment. Orcot snatched it out of his hands and began reading, then blanched.

"What the hell...! This isn't a purchase agreement, it's a fee for... matchmaking services?!"

The count giggled in triumph. "Indeed. It's not illegal to set someone up, is it?"

"Goddammit!!"

"Come now, detective. I thought you should be proud of me. I have disposed of a tyrant by turning him into a new person, and assisted one of the rarest races on Earth. Vegeta Oujisama found the peace and contentment he yearned for all his life, but in the way he least expected– not by gaining control, but by releasing it."

"You're a crazy criminal, and one of these days I will take you down..."

"I have told you before, Leon, we are simply a store that sells love, hope, and dreams."

D rose and retrieved his sketchbook, taking it back to his desk in the corner. He turned the page to admire his drawing of a second, smaller saiyajin, one he'd seen only in his mind's eye from Kakarot's final mental sending, then tenderly closed the cover. As he turned to face Orcot the snakelike dragon embroidered upon his satin cheongsam seemed to shimmer amongst its background of stars. "Vegeta dreamed of the jungle...

"And some wishes do come true."

---

The End

---

-

-

A/N I finished my first chaptered fic (also the first fanfiction I ever started)! Took me long enough. Glittering Stardust Martinis for everyone who read and reviewed, huzzah, thank you so much! (toast) This fic was stressful; I have to do some comedy now.

I know some of you are probably disappointed that there was no lemon at the end, and I debated whether or not to do one, but I really just wanted to concentrate on the transformation and their flight into the forest, and I thought a lemon would weigh it down. Besides, Vegeta has to get used to the shock of all of a sudden having this new body, the explosion of the greenhouse would have caused the servants to come see what was wrong, (the windows EX-ploded so most of the glass would have blown out, but I'm sure some still would have fallen inside and having sex around broken glass would NOT be wise), and Kakarot would want to "carry him over the threshold" into his domain before they consummate. The newlyweds don't do it on the altar. X)

I do have some ideas for a sequel where Kakarot teaches Vegeta about life in the jungle (and that will definitely have lemon), but I need a break from this fic world for a little while. I want to write some one-shots that I've had in mind.

This fic is my little tribute to Pet Shop of Horrors because it's the first anime I ever liked. When anime first started becoming popular here in the states in the '90s, I didn't like it at all (gasp!). I had it stuck in my head that European comics were the highest form of the genre. But I loved animation and comics and kept giving different animes a chance, and PSoH was the first one I thought, "gee, that was actually pretty cool." I got used to the manga style, and now manga are about the only comics I read. Never be afraid to change your mind! I'm so glad I changed mine.

So I tried to keep the story loosely along the lines of a Pet Shop story– the list of rules, Orcot and D discussing the case, the title starting with a D. Dégager means "to set free" in French. Vegeta was "set free" from his cold, control-hungry life, set free from his mental prisons, set free from the dreariness of modern civilization; his old self was stripped away and the purer self deep within allowed to flourish. I hope everything wrapped up and hung together properly at the end; it seemed so to me but then my head floats off into the clouds sometimes. "It is better to be feared than loved" is a quote from Machievelli, by the way. I did really hate to kill off Yamcha after I gave him and Buruma such a nice relationship, but I thought it was necessary and would just have to be the tragic part of the fic. What do you guys think?

Yamcha (barges in): Yes, this was a stressful fic, and that really, really hurt! Now can you please move on to some fics that either do not include me or don't involve me dying horribly?

Vegeta: What are you complaining about? She made me a human! And gave me a short complex! I do NOT have a short complex.

(Yamcha and Goku both look away, whistling.)

V: I don't! Assholes.

OE: That's why its AU, Veggie-san, relax.

Goku: Hey, I didn't have it easy either– I didn't even have a speaking role, and holding ssj4 that long is hard!

OE: You had a, er, "thinking" role. And you look so hot as ssj4, baby!

G: Hot is right. Phew! All that fur... (fans self with his shirt)

Y: Well at least these two wound up happy; I just wound up dead, and I wasn't doing anything wrong!

OE: You were a victim of circumstance. I'm sorry, baby, you did get a raw deal in this story, and I want to make it up to you. I've got a little present for you!

Y: ...Really?

OE: Yes, really. It's a fabulous prize!

Y: (Gasp) A new aircar?

OE: Even better! It's an all-night expenses-paid stay in the mysterious, mystical, magical, Sacred Tiki Love Hut!

Y: Oh, wow! But wait, that would mean–

(G and V give each other an evil look, then each grab a leg and start dragging him off.)

Y: Hey... hey! HEY WAIT A MINUTE! Waah! B-but I'm not even gay!

V (evil grin): You will be.

Buruma (following with a video camera): Now this is a cast party.

---

The End