Disclaimer: I don't own anything except the plot. All Harry Potter™ characters and settings are the sole intellectual property of JK Rowling, Warner Bros. and various others who all aren't connected to me in any way. No money is being made with this fanfiction and no copyright infringement is intended.

"Morning"

"Good morning Harry"

"What's so good about it?"

"Its a bright sunny day. Blue skies. White fluffy clouds"

"Piss off Sirius"

"What crawled up your arse this morning?"

"You did!"

"Didn't hear you complain at the time"

"I was still sleeping!"

"Really?"

"..."

"You've forgotten the 'harder' ... 'faster' ... and the 'fuck me now'?"

"Piss off!"

"And I was just about to offer you some coffee"

"Gimme"

"..."

"Now!"

"Sorry Harry. Best be more polite. I'm going to read my paper instead"

"Paper?"

"Yes"

"..."

"I read!"

"No you don't. You read the latest copy of Wankers Weekly, which you try to hide between the pages, hoping I don't find out!"

"You know?"

"..."

"Bollocks!"

**********

Please review and let me know what you think.