Yay quick update! I didn't go to school yesterday, so I wrote stuffs!

Dib woke fully an hour before his alarm with the distinct feeling that someone was in his room. That was the first thing he was aware of, the second being the unfamiliar aroma of bacon and eggs.

He awoke with a start, already going through his mental monster dictionary for any sort of being that attacked using breakfast foods. He reached out to grab his glasses and realized he couldn't move.

Maybe if it was a breakfast food monster, it had tied him with something he could eat through...

"Oh, he's awake! Goody!"

...or it could be Gretchen and Keef. He should have known, really.

"Wha- What's going on here! Are you insane!" He yelled, turning in the general direction he'd heard Keef's voice from.

"S'okay, Gretch, he's just surprised! I told ya he would be! Heehee, he'll love this, just you wait!" Keef said quietly to Gretchen, whom Dib guessed had the kicked-puppy look again because he didn't like waking up like this.

"W-we, uh, we made you.. b-breakfast, Dib!" Gretchen's stutter had returned, she sounded terrified.

"What are you doing in my house! And why can't I move!" Dib wasn't finished freaking out yet. He'd feel a lot better about his house being broken into and cooked in if he could see or move. Either would be great.

Keef graciously chose to answer Dib's questions. "We made you breakfast, like we said! And we figured you'd react something like this, so I thought tying you down would be a good idea!"

Dib was dumbstruck. "You knew I'd freak out like this, and instead of NOT DOING it, you tie me down?"

"Yep!" He could see the smudge of white for Keef's smile, and he guessed they were nodding. "Good idea, huh?"

"NO! This is a terrible idea! Untie me!"

"Not until you calm down!" Keef sounded almost gleeful.

Dib opened his mouth to shout at them for being crazy some more, but thought better of it. He'd rather be untied. "...can I at least have my glasses?" He asked, sulking.

"O-oh, sure!" Gretchen responded eagerly, completely missing the glare Keef shot her as she dashed across the room. She fumbled with the glasses a bit, but did eventually manage to put them on properly and Dib could see again.

"Thanks," he mumbled, sounding less than grateful.

"You're welcome," she said, beaming at him. His tiny show of gratitude seemed to calm her down considerably, or maybe it was the fact that he'd stopped yelling.

She turned to look at Keef and gave a small nod, which he returned almost imperceptibly. Then he smiled again and took a step towards the door. "I'm gonna go see how Zim is doing! Enjoy your breakfast, Dib! See ya later, Gretchen!" He chirped, waving merrily as he made his way out of the room.

As Keef shut the door, Gretchen began telling him the long, drawn-out stories of all the food on the tray; the bacon had been bought at Meaty's Meat Shack and had been cooked in this manner for this amount of time, the waffles were originally blueberry but they didn't know if he like blueberry so they'd just made six different kinds, the sausage was bought at the Tubed Foods Inc. store, and so on. Dib wondered if she would ever run out of things to talk about, or if she would just loop back to talking about talking. Maybe she'd just start back from the beginning and say all the same things over again.

After about ten minutes, by the time she'd finished describing the layout of the Tubed Foods place, Dib was hungry and bored. "Hey Gretchen? Can I eat yet?"

She didn't seem to mind being interrupted, there wasn't really any other way to get anything through. "You mean you haven't been?"

He stared at her. "I'm still tied up, I can't. Could you please untie me now?"

She blushed deeply. "Oh, I- uh, s-sorry! I guess I forgot.." she mumbled as she undid the straps holding him down. He was a little frightened again now, it wasn't all that reassuring to know that someone forgot they'd tied you down. Suppose he'd been left there? Slowly starving with a tray of food just out of reach...

He attacked the food, still thinking about starving so he ate like he was. Gretchen was pleased at his enthusiasm for the food, which actually was rather good, and between mouthfuls Dib said as much. It wasn't often that he got real food, so he didn't have much for comparison, but it definitely beat another morning of Super Toast or taking the risk of eating Gaz's cereal. All things considered, this was starting out to be a relatively good day despite how oddly it began.

Gretchen blushed deeply and looked down. "T-thanks. M-my mom, uh, she taught me.. and uhm, Keef helped." There was a momentary pause, Gretchen busied herself with cleaning up while Dib freed his legs. Why they had felt the need to tie him down so thoroughly, wasn't going to ask.

"So how'd you guys get in here, anyway?"

"The door was open." Gretchen seemed as surprised at the question as Dib did with the answer, as though that were the most obvious thing in the world.

"..Oh." With all the crazy hi-tech defense systems set up around the house, he could not believe he'd forgotten to lock the doors.

Figures.

His alarm went off and he swung out of bed. "Uh, I have to get dressed and everything. You can wait downstairs if you want."

Gretchen nodded and scurried out with his tray. Dib made sure his door was locked.

Zim emerged from his lab moments before Keef walked back into the kitchen. After arriving home yesterday, he gone straight to a random sub-level, not even caring that Keef witnessed his departure. He was harmless and had found his own way down before, so it didn't much matter. Besides, he could keep Nick company. They ought to get along great with their eternal happiness.

He had stayed below all day brooding, unable to focus on doing anything constructive. Occasionally he would smash something, then snap at the computer to fix it as he smashed something else. The computer did not complain. Fixing things seemed like a better alternative to being the focus of Zim's wrath. Even GIR had stayed away, but maybe Keef had something to do with that.

"Heya buddy! Feeling better?" Keef asked cheerfully, as he skipped into the kitchen.

Zim glowered at him. "No."

"Aww, that's too bad. I hope you're hungry! All that anger musta worked up an appetite! I made breakfast earlier, but last time you didn't seem to like it much. Me an' GIR saved some, just in case!"

"No, Keef, I'm not hungry."

"Okay, but you really should eat! It's good food, I promise!" Zim just glared. "Alright, but I'll bring some muffins in case you're hungry later! Now let's get to skool! We don't wanna be late!"

Zim would really not mind lateness. He didn't see how a few less minutes of hearing Ms. Bitters condemn them all to lives of misery and pain could be a bad thing, but Keef had grabbed his arm and some muffins and was pulling him to the front door.

Zim knocked him off violently, sending Keef bouncing into the wall. "I can still walk, Keef," he snarled. Keef pried himself from the wall and smiled.

"Great! Let's skedaddle!" He said, opening the door. Zim stared blankly at him. What kind of stupid word was 'skedaddle?' When did Keef get so southern?

"Keef?"

"Yeah, buddy?"

"Never, ever use that word ever again."

"Okie dokie!"

GIR had used that phrase, that was at least stupid on a level he could comprehend. Speaking of, where was the little robot? Probably off destroying things elsewhere, but he asked anyway.

"He was sad 'cause you were so upset, but didn't wanna bother you, so I told him to go watch a movie!"

"How long ago?" He wasn't on the couch watching anything on the big T.V., and Zim didn't know of any movie theaters that opened at 6 AM.

"Some time yesterday. Why?"

Zim sighed in annoyance and shook his head. Hopefully nothing too horrible would happen to the robot before he could find him, because he had other things to worry about now.

Keef mysteriously didn't trip this morning, which was good because they barely made it on time as it was. They entered the classroom just as the bell was ringing, earning a disapproving glare from Ms. Bitters. Not that all glares from Ms. Bitters weren't disapproving, really, but she looked a bit more disappointed this time.

"You all must have noticed that the dance is almost upon you all," she hissed. An excited murmur ran through the class. Ms. Bitters scowled. "In light of that, today will be spent lecturing on dances, the fragile relationships formed therein, and the ultimate and utter horror resulting from the aftermath of such traumatic social gatherings."

The class groaned, and Zim focused on the clock.

Precisely fifteen minutes into her lecture, at the point where it was building up into a rant, the door flew open and Dib rushed in, dragging Gretchen behind him.

"DIB! You're late again!" The teacher shrieked, then paused as she noticed Gretchen. "Well this is a surprise. Gretchen, you've never been late before.." She glared again at Dib. "His fault, I suppose. Ah well, not that it will matter, anyway. From here it will just be a sharp decline into delinquency as your life begins it's inevitable downward spiral..."

Gretchen looked like she was going to cry as Ms. Bitters continued lamenting the horrible path the girl's life was sure to take. Dib gave her arm a slight tug and let go, both slowly making their way to their seats as the teacher found a new subject to expound horrible wisdom on.

Zim watched silently, expression darkening again to one of silent rage. Keef glanced from the newly enraged Zim to the oblivious Dib curiously, then looked at Gretchen. She gave a thumbs up, then pointed at him and inclined her head. He shrugged and smiled, then held up a muffin. She smiled back.

Time seemed to slow more than usual this particular day, it felt like the lunch bell would never ring. Zim looked from the clock to Dib steadily, and every time managed to see Gretchen practically drooling over him from the corner of his eye.

Fifteen minutes until lunch, Dib asked to sharpen his pencil. Ms. Bitters ignored him, so he got up and walked across the room to the sharpener next to the door, located conveniently near Zim's desk. He dropped a crumpled ball of paper on his desk as he walked by, not looking down, and quickly sharpened his pencil. He made no move to acknowledge Zim's presence on the way back, and only looked over after he'd sat back down.

Zim hadn't moved since Dib had gotten up. He stared blankly at the paper, then glanced quickly at Dib. Much to his surprise, Dib met his gaze. Zim glanced quickly at the paper then back at Dib, who nodded slightly, then faced front.

Before Zim could reach for the paper to straighten it, a hand swiped it from his desk and dropped another. He looked up sharply to see Keef smiling as he threw the paper away, then waved and retreated to his seat. He gulped, feeling eerily trapped all of a sudden. He looked back at Dib, who hadn't seen the exchange. This had the potential to be a very bad situation.

He unfolded Keef's paper, stared, then turned it over. Then he turned it over again. It was blank. He glanced back at Keef, who was smiling innocently, then at Dib, who was watching expectantly. Zim held up the blank piece of paper and Dib frowned, then turned to stare sullenly out the window before Zim could attempt to explain.

That was too much. After all he'd suffered, Dib had the audacity to ignore him! This wasn't even his fault! He leapt up on his desk and shouted something, but the bell drowned it out. No matter, now it was lunchtime and he could yell at Dib as much as he wanted without fear of the evil teacher-lady.

He waited until the flood of people had gone before getting off of his desk and had taken a step towards Dib, who had been joined by Gretchen, when a hand grabbed his arm and pulled him towards the door.

"C'mon, Zim! You didn't eat breakfast, so you gotta be hungry! Let's get you some food!"

Zim grabbed at the door frame but was pulled away. "DIB! You miserable human, help me!" The noise of the hallway drowned out his plea, and Keef steered them into the herd of people and they were trapped until they reached the cafeteria. Keef nudged Zim towards the lunch line, also reminding him of his presence.

"KEEF!" He whirled around to face him. "What in the name of the mighty Armada do you think you're doing!"

Keef blinked, then smiled again. "Getting lunch with my bestest friend! You're so silly sometimes, Zim!"

"Silly! You call me silly! Away with you! I've no time for your foolish nonsense of stupidyness!" He pointed angrily away. "Now begone with you! I've much work to do, much work that does NOT INVOLVE YOU!"

And Keef just smiled. "I understand, Zim. You need some alone time! Okay, I'll go get us some food, you can find a table and wait! I'll be right back, buddy!" He scampered off, waving back at Zim over his shoulder.

Zim screamed again and ran from the lunchroom out into the dark halls. He was about to employ his spider legs when he plowed into someone running as fast and frantically as he was.

Dib.

"Oww! Geez, watch where you're going!" Dib groaned, rubbing his head. He looked up, and gasped when he realized who it was he'd collided with.

"Zim! What the- What are you doing here? Where's Keef?" He spoke the name disdainfully, though he hadn't meant to. He and Keef had some sort of grudge going on, though why or about what wasn't exactly clear.

Zim flinched and looked over his shoulder, afraid Keef might have followed. "Not here, it seems," he sounded relieved. "And what about you? Where has your large-toothed follower gone?" He sneered as Dib brushed himself off.

"I left her in Ms. Bitters' room. She probably won't come looking for me for a little while, I hope. You know she-" He stopped. He was going to say she and Keef had been in his room that morning, but Zim didn't need to know that. His abrupt stop was covered by Zim's interjection.

"That note you left me, what did it say? Keef took it before I could read it."

"Liar, Keef was never over there! You just want to hear me say it!"

"I didn't see what you wrote! Why would I want to hear your stupid voice any more than I have to?"

"Because the only other person you have to talk to is Keef!" Shockingly enough, Zim didn't have a comeback for that. "Did you really not read it?"

Zim glared at him. Dib took that as a 'no.' He sighed, not exactly wanting to say it.

"Fine. I said.. you were right. This IS a problem. And after the dance, they aren't gonna go away. We have to do something."

Zim cackled victoriously. "I knew it! Even with all of your foolish Earth pride, you had to see that I was right!"

"This is exactly why I didn't wanna say it! God, Zim!"

The alien continued to cackle and congratulate himself on being so flawless.

"That's it, I'm leaving."

"Heh.. Dib, wait! Hahah, yes, I was right! So, what do we do? The Keef has barely let me leave his sight for the past few days, so it would be difficult to do anything at my labs..."

"Why haven't you thrown him out or something?"

"I tried! GIR keeps letting him back in! Now GIR is missing, but the computer won't do anything about him!" Zim was growing angry again.

"Okay, so we just can't use your labs. If we really need to, we can use my dads, but that should be a last resort, Zim. They're annoying and creepy, but they're still people."

"Fine. Then what do you suggest we do, hmm?" He asked sarcastically. Dib blinked.

"Um... good question." A pause. "I'm not sure. We should probably wait and make sure they don't just go away on their own, now that I think about it..."

"So you're backing out?" Not that it took much, but Zim was rapidly going back to his previous black mood. Dib matched his anger quickly and easily, his usual response to Zim's irrational moods was to follow suit and vice versa.

"I am not! I just don't wanna screw this up while we still need them! Did you forget the penalty of this stupid dance! Huh!"

"I couldn't if I tried! That's all any of you miserable humans have been talking about for days! I just thought-" He caught himself. His thoughts were better off kept to himself.

"You know what? I don't even wanna hear it! Gretchen is one of the only people who's nice to me! Did I tell you that? I can't believe I even considered what you said!" He turned and started to walk away. "I'm gonna go find her, you can deal with Keef on your own."

Zim stared after him for a moment, fuming. "FINE!" He yelled after him, a little unnecessary as Dib was still rather close by. "You'll change your mine, oh how it will change! And when you do, don't even BOTHER coming to me! You'll just have to deal with her on your own!" He started to run again, back towards the cafeteria. He could probably make it back before Keef was through the line and save himself some questions if he hurried... and it would put distance between himself and Dib.

Nothing had turned out like either one had planned, and for the second time in as many days the only things they'd said to each other had been bitter and harsh. They'd normally be civil to each other during such circumstances, if not semi-friendly, but something about other people being involved made it awkward and difficult. Things were changing, they both knew it, and were both somewhat afraid. The daily routine of name-calling and fighting had already come to a crashing halt, and they were afraid of what they might lose next.

Dib found Gretchen as he'd left her, gazing out Ms. Bitters' window.

"Uh, Dib? I don't see it. There aren't any clowns out there..."

"Sorry, my bad! Guess it was a squirrel or something! Ready to get lunch?" He offered a pained smile. She'd been staring out the window the whole time, looking for clowns which weren't there. How someone could be so blindingly stupid was beyond Dib, but lately his people had been surprising him more and more.

She smiled back and nodded, and they walked together to the cafeteria, Gretchen filling in the silence talking about... Dib didn't even care anymore. Something boring, the story of a girl who was perfectly average in every way. His thoughts travelled back to Zim, and he sighed. The little scene in the hallway a few minutes ago had probably been more exciting than Gretchen's entire life, except maybe for the lice queen ordeal. She'd taken that rather blandly, as though it'd been nothing more than a mediocre movie instead of a potentially fatal adventure.

But what choice did he have?

Zim slide into his usual seat just as Keef checked out of the lunch line.

"Hey Zim! Thanks for waiting!" He slid in across from Zim, pushing a tray of bright red chunks across the table at him. It looked like chips of brick mixed with paint, and smelled like hair spray. Zim gagged.

"What is that! Is it food!"

"No idea, buddy! Tastes okay, thought!" Keef managed around a mouthful of bricky goo.

"How can you stand to eat that filth!"

Keef shrugged and scooped up another spork full. "Aren't you gonna eat yours?" He gestured to the tray with said spork, spilling a little of the gooey substance onto the table, where it promptly burnt a small hole.

"Uh.. no thanks. I.. already ate! I ate while you were in line, so you see, I'm really not hungry!"

"Suit yourself! It's really good, though!" Keef continued to shovel food into his mouth. Zim watched, unable to turn away from the hideous sight before him.

Across the cafeteria, Dib was suffering from the same horror as Gretchen ate. Simultantiously, he and Zim tore their eyes away from the horrendous sight and looked across the cafeteria directly at each other, then turned sharply back to the grotesque scenes they'd so struggled to look away from.

Keef was finishing off Zim's tray when the bell rang. Dib had declined Gretchen's offer to get him a tray and so had only had to suffer through one tray of 'food,' but watching her eat was horrifying. At the sound of the bell, the two rivals both bolted for the relative safety of the classroom.

The entered the room at about the same time and collapsed into their desks. Neither looked at each other as the class filed in. They didn't look at each other as Ms. Bitters lectured, and when the release bell rang, Dib and Gretchen left with the rest of the students, leaving Keef and Zim to wait as the hallways cleared.

Keef and Gretchen's plans were succeeding better than they thought.

Ten pages! Yes! That's a record! I've never written anything this long ever! I've been working at it all day, it'd better be pretty long. I'm happy, people keep saying they want the chapters to be longer, and I finally wrote one that is.

Anyway, sorry if this isn't up to expectations or something, I wanted to end it 3 or 4 times but it didn't seem long enough. I had to end the skool day! And the next chapter is the dance. I swear there will be ZADR there! I was going to put it here, but that would've messed up my plans for the next chapter, and I've been plotting that for a while now.

Heh, I wish I got $20 each time I read or wrote somethng slashy! Gawd, that would be awesome! I'd be so rich! Thanks to All Apologies and Pinkey Pseudonym for being nice about that, though really I was kind of happy. In some sad, demented way, it's like initiation to the slash community or something. I don't know, like some kinda milestone or something. Does that make sense?

Even if it doesn't, I have to go to school and be angry about art thieves. Grr.