Walk a Little Straighter Daddy

By

Snivellus aka Heather Granger

A/N: I wanted to thank all my reviewers. I really like this story, I may have made him a little soft, but remember that he was still only 19 in this story and he has just been through trauma. I believe that his personality that is in Canon develops over his time as a teacher and as a spy.

"If I've learned one thing from him
Its my kids will never have to say
Walk a little straighter daddy
You're swaying side to side
You're footsteps make me dizzy
And no matter how I try
I keep tripping and stumbling
if you'd look down here you'd see
Walk a little straighter daddy
You're leading me"

Severus had left for Lucius Malfoy's house directly after his graduation, no point in sticking around, when he had no one to converse with.

"Glad you decided to come Severus." Lucius greeted.

"Yes, well I am in need of work and money." Severus explained.

"Well I assure you that this new wizard will provide you with both. He is amazing. He created a Dementor, out of nothing, out our emotions. It was indescribable Severus. No one has ever been able to accomplish this feat, though many have tried." Lucius reveled.

"That is..." For the first time in Severus life he was speechless.

"Impossible?" Lucius offered.

"Yes impossible."
"No, not impossible, nothing is impossible, not for him."

"I am in." Severus said surly.

Those three little words changed his life forever. Three words that he would never live down. Things took a turn for the worse when Severus was asked to commit a murder. Severus was very much into the Dark Arts, no doubt about that, but he was not a killer. He may have called a few wizards and witches mudbloods, but he was not an evil person.

Severus had been working for the man that asked to be called Voldermort for nearly a year. He had learned a great deal from him and was mostly only asked to provide the wizard with several complex potions every once an awhile.

Things got more heated up in the spring of his first year. There were nearly twenty wizards and witches who took the Mark, and countless others who supported the movement. Voldermort was taking decisive action in targeting key enemies who had either wronged him in someway or were not pure of blood.

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He stood at the door of the Longbottoms house awaiting to complete his task. He was to kill Frank and Alice, new Auroras who had recently killed one of the Dark Lord's most loyal servants, Jonathan Macintosh.

Severus twirled his wand in his hand, looking up to the second story window. He saw the shadows of a mother and her infant. She danced by the window holding her child. Everything he had wanted from his own parents was there looking down on him, mocking him, taunting him. If there was any time that he could have done what was asked of him, it was now, but something did not feel right. Why should he take something from them. The child would be no better off them him. He would end up just like him, without parents who cared for him. He could wish that on no one.

Standing cloaked in black Severus's conscience pulled at him. Oddly enough, the voice sounded much like Albus Dumbledore.

'You know Mr. Snape, that with knowledge comes power. What will you choose to do with that power? People may remember evil, but from goodness comes heroes, who are irreplaceable.'

"What are you waiting for?" A voice from the background hissed.

"I see someone coming." Severus quickly lied.

"Where?"

"To the left, we should get out of here." Severus said again.

"Are you sure? We will be punished if we do not complete the task."

"I will be punished, you will be reprimanded. Would you rather end up in Azkaban? What if they are Auroras?" Severus tried to persuaded.

"Fine, if you are sure."

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"Severus, my loyal servant you have failed me." Voldermort hissed as he paced around the man.

"There were Auroras coming, I could sense it, as you instructed I came back." Severus tried to explain.

After he had finished speaking, he felt a burning in his mind. He felt exposed. Images of his childhood flashing before his eyes, every moment he wished he could forget was being seen by the Dark Lord. Severus did not know how to respond; he had read of this type of wizardry, it was called Occulmency. He desperately tried to remember how to end the brutal attack. Then he remembered, clear his mind.

The Dark Lord quit the attack and stood with his eyes glaring into Severus's.

"I am disappointed Severus, but I will not kill you. I shall spare you for you have potential once coached properly. Perhaps I have not prepared you well enough for this mission, but after tonight, I am sure you will have no difficulty."

"Yes, my lord." Severus responded. Defiance would not get him anywhere right now.

"Crucio" Voldermort commanded as he watched as Severus bent to his knees to the cold hard cobblestone.

Pain throbbed throughout his body. He could not see straight, in fact he could barely open his eyes. One decision, one choice, changed his life.

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After he had been released from his punishment, he took stock of his injuries. Minus the fact that he was having a hard time focusing any farther than two feet in front of him, he felt blood dripping from above his right brow line. His arm that held the Dark Mark was he feared broken. He limped away from the castle, and decided that he was too foggy to Apparate.

A half hour later, he found himself a little over a mile from Hogsmeade. Looking back, this was perhaps his lowest moment. To the right of him stood Hogwarts, and to the left his home.

If he took the left, then he would be taking the easy way out, he would not have made a change. He would go home, find his father asleep on the couch heal his wounds, and return to the Dark Lord. If he took the right, maybe just maybe the one man who had congratulated him when no one else had, could help him.

Severus chose the right, and tread on towards the castle battered and bruised.

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Severus got to the castle, and was greeted by Rubeus Hagrid.

"Whos there?" The gruff voice asked into the darkness.

"Hagrid, I need to speak with the Headmaster." He said, his breathing shallow from the distance he had walked.

"Master Severus?" He asked.

"Yes, please." He said tired.

That was the first time Hagrid ever heard the young boy say the word, he knew something was most definitely wrong.

Hagrid took large steps leading to the two statues that guarded the Headmaster's office. Severus paused a few meters back from the half-giant leaning ever so slightly on the wall, trying to catch his breath.

"Do you want me to fetch Madame Pomfrey for yah?" Hagrid asked after he had spoke the password.

"No, I need to speak with the Headmaster." Severus insisted.

"Very well, follow me." Hagrid walked up the spiral staircase and found Albus writing a document.

"Hagrid, what do I owe the pleasure?" Albus asked somewhat cheerily.

"Its not a pleasure sir, I found Master Severus out on the grounds, he is wanting to talk to yah sir."

"Oh?" Albus said as he peered over the giant's shoulder and saw the battered man.

"Headmaster." Severus said quietly.

"Thank you Hagrid."

"Anything sir." Hagrid said humbly as he exited the office.

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Severus walked towards the old man's desk glancing at the chairs that flanked either side of his desk.

"Sit down Severus, do you want to see Madame Pomfrey?" Albus offered as he waved one of the chairs to sit opposite of him.

"No, I have made it this far, I think I can look after myself." Severus said trying to save what little face he had.

"What brings you here?"

"I made a horrible mistake." Severus admitted quietly.

"To error is human, Severus." Albus said as he offered him a lemon drop.

"I chose evil." He said referring to what the man had said to him a year ago. Severus gently rolled up his sleeve, trying not to disturb the broken bone.

"The Dark Mark. I have heard of its existence, and now I see it in the flesh, from one of my most promising students." Albus said gravely.

"Why have you come here?" Albus asked.

"I do not know." Severus said truthfully.

"How did it come to this?"

"Do you know me? Do you know who I am? Did you ever care?" Severus questioned back.

Albus closed his eyes, how much he reminded him of Tom. How much he needed love. Albus stood and walked towards the young man. He hovered over him silently for a few moments, and then reached out to him. Severus flinched horribly. Albus closed his eyes, and muttered a spell that Severus could not understand.

Severus felt warmth flow through him, his bone still broken, and his head still bleeding, but it seemed distance as if he was at peace. Albus let go, and summoned the chair next to the broken wizard and sat.

Then it happened, Severus had done what he had needed to do for 19 years. He cried. Later neither man spoke about it, but it is what he needed most that night. The two sat for several minutes as he let silent tears of anger and neglect flow.

"Severus, I have a proposition for you." Albus offered.

"What if I could help you, by having you help me in return?" He said after Severus had quickly wiped his face a mix of blood and tears.

"What do you have in mind." He said weakly.

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It began. Albus Dumbledore explained the prophecy and the power of the one that Severus served. There was one thing that was never discussed that night, and that was the Order. Albus wanted a trial period, help the man stay on the right path, and teach him how to spy.

Albus escorted him to the Infirmary and helped as Madame Pomfrey healed his wounds. Some wounds that were not visible took longer to heal, and some are still healing. They began lessons in Occulmency that next week, and later that year he would be admitted into the Order, much to the chagrin of James Potter and Sirius Black. Severus never had anything to prove to them, he did not care if they did not trust his allegiance. His own allegiance stood to his conscience and no one else.

Severus Snape may never be the friendliest man that ever lived, but he has become a man of morals. It was the only thing his father ever taught him.

Severus had found that his father was just as, or perhaps more lost than he had once been. Severus wanted nothing more than to be different from his father. He wanted to become the man that his father could have been.

"Yeah walk a little straighter daddy, you're leading me."