Wow, it's been far too long since I attempted to write a parody. Curse seriousness! So... this is a pretty random story which came to mind before. Enjoy, R&R.

Anna Valerious ran quickly down the corridor, her heeled boots slapping the wet floor loudly. She followed the corridor around to Gabriel Van Helsing's room. He just happened to be leaning against the doorframe sexily when her heel snapped, she slid forward to near-certain death (or at least a rather large lump on the head), and he caught her in his arms.

"Anna!" he exclaimed. "What are you doing running around?"

"There'll never be a satisfactory reason for it... it's fanfiction," Anna shrugged.

"Oh, okay."

Gabriel and Anna began to snog passionately, until Gabriel pulled his head away. Miraculously, Anna's lipstick was still perfectly in place, and none had gone on Gabriel's face. Oh, the world of fanfiction.

"Now I remember!" Gabriel exclaimed. "You're dead!"

Anna's mouth fell into a pout, so that she resembled a fish. "Am not."

"Are too."

"Am not."

"Are too."

"Am not."

"Are too."

"Are too."

"Am not- damn!" Gabriel sighed, realising he'd been caught out.

"Now we've cleaned that up, snogging!" Anna said happily.

"Oh, okay," shrugged Gabriel, wrapping his arms around her and snogging her some more.

At that moment, Carl came around the corner, wearing, for some unknown reason, a kilt.

"Hello," he said.

Anna pulled herself from Gabriel with a loud 'pop' and the pair of them stared at him.

"Why are you wearing a kilt?" Anna asked.

"Well, I wanted something that showed off my legs, you see," Carl said, running a hand down his left thigh and posing. "Cardinal Jinette banned me from wearing hot pants, even though he said he did quite like the pink PVC ones." He twirled.

Anna and Gabriel stared for a few minutes before shrugging and continuing to snog. Carl watched, eyebrows raised.

They were soon interupted by Dracula coming around the corner, his hair loose and curly, wearing rose tinted glasses, a lime green shirt and bellbottomed pants. He was clutching a small guitar and singing "Amazing Grace". His brides walked behind him, hair flowing, singing along.

Carl couldn't help himself. He began to dance the hornpipe.