Loud silence

------------------- Chapter one -------------------

Shadows on the porch

It was late Sunday evening. Nobody was around this area of Corel due to the weather. Heavy rain had been falling all day, and on and off for the past week. Most people were moaning, saying it was miserable. Tifa on the other hand, had a different outlook. Rain like this forced people to stop busying about their lives for a short while and just take it easy. Work would calm down, children would stop rushing around under people's feet on the streets, and parents would get the chance to spend more quality time with their kids.

This was one such time.

This week had made farming virtually impossible on the surrounding fields, and any stalls in central market were no longer there, meaning no market at all. So, nobody was out. The few who worked during the week still had to no doubt, but the rain seemed to make things calmer. It was forecast that today was the last instalment of expected rain, so instead of sitting herself in front of the television tonight with Barrett and Marlene, Tifa had decided to make the most of this temporary serenity.

The wooden bench swing supported on chains to the overhead roof on the back porch seemed like the perfect spot to spend the night. It was summer, and the air was pleasantly warm though at the same time moist from the rain that was still fast falling. The wooden railing running around the porch stopped at the mouth to reveal two steps that planted down on the ground of the wet cobbled road in front, and a clear wide view of the open grassy field ahead that sported trees dotted here and there in the distance, with one large rounded willow tree close by. It was here Tifa's glance was fixed. Rain would patter off the surface of the crisp leaves, creating a small waterfall of rainwater as the droplets fell and gathered in a smooth river down the curved arms of branches. The sounds were beautiful and melded together to create a picture of nature that made Tifa feel at home again. Settling here was easy at a time like this. But there were also the days when things never worked right, and she would return to the house feeling empty, uncomfortable and doubting her choices.

She nudged her feet out of her flat shoes and propped her legs up on the bench, causing it to swing in movement slightly. She fidgeted, moving the end of the thin fleece like white blanket over to cover her bare feet. Lifting her left hand up to her mouth, she began nibbling her forefinger nail, the one that Marlene used as a testing pallet earlier for nail polish. She wasn't allowed to use it herself yet at such a young age, so instead, Tifa became her testing subject. Tifa was nearly done but there was still a few specks of pink and purple that needed to come off.

Just then the door opened on her right, just behind her. She looked round to see the door slowly open wide enough for a little person to step out, reaching up holding the door handle, and dangling a fluffy teddy bear in her hand. The little girl yawned as she let go of the door and rubbed her eye sleepily, her small feet stepping on the wooden cladding over to where Tifa sat. She stopped in front of Tifa and held her arms out. Tifa smiled and reached down, lifting the girl up in her arms, and sat her in her lap, covering her with the blanket. "What are you doing up Marlene? It's a bit past your bed time isn't it?" The girl wrinkled her nose and shook her head lightly before shoving her thumb in her mouth. With a quiet yawn, Marlene nuzzled her head softly into Tifa's stomach, which she used as her comfy pillow. Tifa frowned slightly before smiling in defeat. She moved the blanket so it covered both her and Marlene, and wrapped her arms around the girl, rubbing her hand on her back to warm her. Marlene clutched her teddy bear under her arm, closed her eyes and curled up in a ball, feeling warm and safe in Tifa's arms. Trouble sleeping wasn't the problem with the little girl; it was the fact that she preferred to sleep out with Tifa, compared to sleeping alone in her room. Tifa obviously didn't mind, but she knew Barrett wasn't best pleased with the idea that Marlene wasn't being independent enough to sleep alone at night. Unknown to both adults, what the little girl was trying to do was hold onto her family. She didn't want them to leave her alone again with strangers. She wanted them to stay with her this time. If she let them out of her sight for long enough, she was frightened she would wake up and find them gone.

Just like in Midgar.

Tifa softly stroked Marlene's hair, resting her cheek on the young girl's head, she could smell her own shampoo's scent in Marlene's hair and she smiled. She'd obviously picked up Tifa's bottle of it when Barrett had bathed her last night. Sitting here, Tifa could listen to the faint sound of Marlene's breathing, and she felt calm that her goddaughter was safe. She was the one responsible for the care of the young girl if something were to happen to Barrett, or she would be after the christening next week. She felt more like the girls mother everyday. She was just like Marlene, she had lost her mother too, though she had been lucky enough to have shared time with her mother, to learn from her and grow up with her – Marlene had never known hers.

'Would you be able to make up for that?' Tifa wondered to herself. Many seemed to think they appeared more to be sisters, or was it mother and daughter? You couldn't tell. No one could pinpoint it, but everyone could tell they were close. Tifa was the older, female role that Marlene needed in her life, and she wouldn't give up on her. The hope of ever having a child of her own had been lost somewhere over the past three years. She'd given up on that idea, choosing a more realistic option of keeping the family she had now, her Marlene and Barrett, rather than chasing the risk of starting her own family, which she knew deep down was less likely to happen - given her circumstances, than Cid quitting smoking. Tifa gently kissed Marlene's hair and then rested her cheek on the young girls head, closing her eyes and nudged the bench into a light swinging movement, before gently falling to sleep.

Barrett shuddered again, as a chill ran down his back. He cursed under his breath and stood up from the sofa, leaving the television to talk to itself as he left the room. He walked past Marlene's room – door open – and frowned as he saw the back door wide open. "Marlene! What've I told ya about doors! Close them after ya! Do you want this house to get freezin' cold like it is outside?" He said, as he reached the back door about to close it when he caught sight of the two sitting on the bench swing. He immediately shut himself up and walked over to them.

He couldn't help but smile at the sight before him. Tifa was sat up, with her legs laid across the bench holding Marlene who was huddled up to her. Two little shadows on the porch, both melded together in one shaded form. Both of them were sound asleep, Marlene's little mouth open with her thumb loosely between her lips. Barrett smiled to himself. "You two too good for my pillows?" He commented, seeing Tifa's head rested gently on his daughters, with Marlene choosing Tifa's arm as her headrest. He leaned over carefully and tucked the blanket closer to the pair, in the same way a father would tuck in his two children at night. Lastly he kissed his daughters head lightly, ruffling her hair gently with one of his large hands, and turned to walk back inside the house, closing the door quietly behind him.

It was then the phone rang.

Barrett froze. It wasn't the house phone it was his PHS ringing, he could hear that familiar beep coming from it from where he kept it on the wide side table below the back window. When that thing rang these days, it meant something was wrong. They were only ever used in emergencies. He picked it up gingerly and clicked the flap open pressing it to his ear. "Speaking." He answered in an unusually gruff voice that gave away his nerves. He immediately cleared his throat and then steadied himself waiting for the reply. "Barrett. Long time no see, so to speak." Barrett calmed down slightly hearing Elmyra's voice come from the other end. "How is everything coming on?" She asked in her usual calm voice. "I'm sorry I had to ring you on this number, but I never did get your home number from you, I'd been so used to using the PHS number to get hold of everyone when you were travelling!" She commented. Barrett cursed himself mentally for forgetting to put their house number on the christening invitations. "No problem Elmyra. It just scares the hell outta me every time the damn thing rings, hang on I'll give ya the house number, ya can ring me from that. Even talking on this thing is makin' me edgy." He admitted. So he recited the number to her and hung up.

Sure enough, the house phone rang and he picked up the receiver from the phone hung up on the kitchen wall. He answered and immediately Elmyra launched into conversation about the christening. He nodded and muttered a 'yes' or 'maybe' or a 'not really' in the right places, whilst concentrating more on the main kitchen window over the sink that showed a clear view of the main field at the back of their home. He also kept a watchful eye on Tifa and Marlene, so much so that he completely lost what Elmyra was saying. But she soon brought him back to reality again.

"Barrett!" He jumped and blinked a few times.

"Uh, yeah?"

"Were you even listening to me?" She asked, sounding clearly agitated.

"Sorry, I was just keeping an eye on Marlene. She's dumped herself on Tifa – again."

Elmyra smiled from where she was sat at her small round kitchen table, where she had moved the phone. "I think you certainly made the right choice about who to be Marlene's godmother Barrett." She stated, her voice softening. Barrett sighed.

"I know. I wouldn't trust anyone else with taking care o' her when I'm gone, and I know Marlene wouldn't let me choose anyone else anyways..." Barrett went quiet. Elmyra knew what he was thinking and so did everyone else, which was mainly the reason she got a call from Cid telling her that everyone had nominated her to be the one to arrange final plans over what time to arrive for the christening and other things. She'd call him back when she hung up on Barrett and he would pass it on. Well, seen as she had the task of doing it, she might as well make use of it and silence a few of her own nagging questions while she was at it.

"And the godfather?" She asked daringly after a short silence. A much longer silence followed.

"What godfather?" Barrett replied angrily. Elmyra's eyes widened.

"I thought you said Cl – "

"I said that, I offered that. But he's not exactly proving me right is he?" Elmyra went silent, and gave Barrett the chance to continue which he did.

"I went through the options. But Vincent aint exactly child friendly, and Cid would just make Marlene end up putting the same damn shit in her mouth he does all the time."

"I don't much like what comes out of his mouth either. All that foul language." Elmyra added shaking her head disapprovingly.

"So, that left him din' it? Tifa reckoned he was responsible enough with her, and she loves Cloud to bits."

"Ah yes...but we all knew that didn't we?" Elmyra stated knowingly. Barrett paused looking dumbfounded.

"I was talking about Marlene, she practically loves him like he's her real uncle already. But he's a complete asshole if he thinks I'm lettin' him any where near the church next week" Barrett said bluntly.

"Then in that case, who will be her godfather? Surely she will have two godparents?"

"Yeah well that's what I wanted for her. She deserves it ya know? But with all this recent crap with Cloud and his little 'escapade'" Barrett said in a mocking voice. "I don't know what I'm gonna do. The plans gone way outta the window now. Besides, Tifa's good with her. Marlene's even startin' to look like her, and act like her. She's always beggin' to do bakin' with her, and Tifa even taught her how to do a twist on my arm that friggin' hurts! Little brat." He chuckled.

Elmyra sighed. "So no Cloud?"

"No." Barrett stated with authority. "She's my little girl and I don't want to worry about her with some irresponsible jerk like Spike when she'd be fine with someone else lookin' after her. Even Reeve would do the job."

Elmyra smiled. She had always heard Barrett call Cloud Spike when they were friends. That name always showed Barrett's fondness of him.

"Well, don't think about Reeve yet, Marlene is nowhere near as close to him as she is to Cloud. Reeve is near a stranger to the little one. She only knew Cait, never the man behind him. Give Cloud a chance Barrett. Please."

Barrett hung up the phone sometime later. He sat himself down with a heavy sigh at the kitchen table in thought. Cloud was obviously the one man he trusted most of all with his daughter. Plus, the blonde haired jerk had become the closest equivalent to a best friend to Barrett, along with Cid of course. But Cloud needed steering once in a while, whereas Cid was always more outgoing and knew his own mind. That's what made the bond between he and Cloud stronger. Barrett gave advice, helped his younger comrade, and steered him in the right direction all with the hand of fatherly authority Cloud had always lacked in his life. But recent events had shattered their relationship.

Possibly for good.

Tifa stirred and woke with a start. She snapped her eyes open and quickly looked down at Marlene – who to her relief was still sleeping soundly. She wrapped her arms closely around the little girl and kissed her head before she moved her head back up, and cracked her aching neck. Sleeping in such a position with her head bent down didn't do her neck any favours. It wasn't dawn yet. But the sky was light; a shade of misty blue showing the night was breaking at the seams to allow daylight through soon. She moved her hand up to rub her forehead and felt wet beads of sweat gather on her fingertips. She frowned and sighed. "The dream must have been worse than I thought...Dammit I wish it didn't have an effect on me. Not anymore..." She told herself as she sat there waiting for dawn to come. Though she knew that wouldn't be for a few hours yet. She carefully gathered Marlene in her arms, wrapping the blanket around her and carried her inside, stopping just before the front door to bend down and pick up the teddy bear after it fell out of Marlene's loose grip.

Tifa pulled back the covers on Marlene's bed and laid down her soon to be goddaughter on the pink sheet covered mattress, and removed the white thin blanket from the porch off of her, replacing it with her chocobo patterned duvet cover. She smiled to herself, as she looked at the white pyjamas Marlene was dressed in which were patterned with white, yellow and pink mogs. She pulled down the bright yellow blind on the window that was on the wall that her bed rested up against and then left the room closing the door quietly behind her.

She needed a shower. Clear her head and freshen up...yeah that sounded like a good idea she thought. So she discarded the white blanket in her hands, in the washing basket on the upstairs landing and made her way to her room. She pulled open her top drawer and pulled out clean underwear and thick black socks, placed them on the top of her drawers and opened the second drawer, which was full of t-shirts and tops that weren't regarded to her as worthy of wardrobe space, or just simply didn't need to be hung up. She rummaged through them until she came upon a plain black short-sleeved rugby style top, with a pocket on each side of the chest. She grabbed the folded top and shoved it on top of her drawers beside her underwear, and kneeled down to her third and bottom drawer which was full of 'the other things'. In other words, it had trousers and jeans for slacking around the house in, plus a few thin sweaters, and knitted jumpers. She grabbed a pair of dark denim jeans, slinging them on her neat bed, along with her other clothes she had gathered and turned her attention to finding a clean towel.

Tifa stepped onto the white tiled bathroom floor which was flecked with strategically placed small light blue tiles also. She reached over to turn the knobs of the shower and fiddled until the running water felt the right temperature as it tumbled through her fingers. She rang her hand clear of water and dumped her clean hair towel on the toilet seat. After a short trip to the washing basket with her used clothes, she dropped her body towel and stepped into the shower, poking her head momentarily around the frosted glass shower door to check she had locked the bathroom door. She clicked the shower door closed again and stood with her head tilted upwards as the hot water tumbled over her face. Shortly after she grabbed a tub of shampoo and emptied a considerable amount of it onto her head, followed by the same brand of conditioner shortly after. The smell filled the bathroom within ten minutes and after she rinsed the last bit of soap from her body she stepped out, twisted the knobs off to halt the water. She rubbed her hair vigorously with her small towel before wrapping her long hair around inside it, twisting it all around and placing the whole lot on top of her head. She padded her skin with the larger towel and wrapped it around her body before she freshened herself up completely.

Leaving the bathroom sometime later, licking the toothpaste smudge from the corner of her mouth, she entered her room and got dressed hastily. It was bound to be dawn in an hour or maybe less. She didn't want to miss the chance of quiet alone time. When dressed, and her hair in a high pony tail as not to wet her back with it, she walked downstairs, put on her usual walking boots and long black thick fabric jacket and opened the front door. She almost fell over herself, as she stopped so abruptly.

"Don't move."

Tifa was inclined to disagree – but was silenced by the fact that she was staring down the barrel of a 9mm.

"What do you want?" She said bravely after a long uncomfortable silence. Her head spun straight over the fact that Marlene was sleeping barely a few feet away in her room. She needed to get all attention on her and keep it that way.

The dark haired man in front of her sneered at her from behind his dark shades.

"That my dear is simple. I am here to collect a pick-up."

Tifa froze – what if the pick-up he was talking about was Marlene?

"And what exactly is this pick-up?" She asked bitterly, careful to avoid the word 'who' in that sentence.

"Well that seems obvious doesn't it? Seen as you're the one with a gun in your face."

Tifa had no time to think before the next incident unfolded.

The man lifted his free hand up to show a pair of hard silver handcuffs.

"Cuff her."

The four uniformed men surrounding the doorway, who had previously stood un-noticed behind their superior, suddenly stepped forward. The closest two grabbed one of Tifa's arms each in a vice like grip to rival that of even Barrett. They yanked her forward so suddenly that she yelped, losing her step, so she tripped on her feet. This made no difference to the men – their grip was tight enough to hold her up without effort. She steadied herself on her feet just in time for her arms to be painfully twisted behind her back so hard that she felt like her arms would snap. The last pair out of the four men walked down the smooth paved path leading around the back of the house, and followed it around the bend as it levelled off past the field to where a black square-back shaped van was parked. One of them unlocked the back doors and flung them open, standing beside them waiting for Tifa to be led into it. Sure enough the two men holding her, threw her roughly into the back of the van so she smacked against the steel mesh at the top of the black panel that divided the back from the front seats.

Then her handlers got quickly into the van with her, the doors slamming and locking shut behind them. One of them sat down on the metal bench like seat running along one of the walls of the van, while the other grabbed hold of Tifa and shoved her down hard on the opposite wall seat, before sitting beside her. That moment, she listened as the front doors of the van opened. Three men got in, the superior out of the men who had given the orders, sat in the middle of the three front seats, turning his head round as he rested his arm on the back of his seat, looking at her through the steel mesh separating them. She remained quiet with her head down as the van started up its engine. "Despite the circumstances Ms. Lockheart, it is a pleasure to have you in my company. I always wanted to meet you out of that AVALANCHE group. You were the feisty one, the one with all the attitude and strength. Those qualities do wonders for a mans mind." He said with a sneer that made her feel physically sick. This guy made her skin crawl. He laughed slightly to himself before turning back round to face the windscreen.

She looked between the two men sat with her. They were in a navy blue and black uniform, similar to that of the old SOLDIER uniform – though it had nothing to do with SOLDIER, it was just the fact that it was a military style uniform that reminded her of it. They wore navy military hats, with black visors covering half of their faces. She could only make out their mouths – One of the men was cautiously licking the cracked skin of his lip, a cold sore she guessed. She almost felt sorry for him before she realised he was responsible for capturing her. Her hatred soon returned and she moved her glance back to the floor. Loose strands of her wet hair fell down and tickled her face, but she shook them away with a light movement of her head. What she wouldn't give to just be able to reach up and tuck the annoying strands behind her ears right now...

Hours passed. She fidgeted constantly, but only to a certain extent. She didn't want to gain the attention of that slime-ball sat up front. She ached painfully. Her wrists were beginning to bruise from the tight grip of the hand-cuffs, and the sharp edges of the cuffs were beginning to scratch repeatedly on her skin, the more she moved about to try and get comfy. She could already feel her small cuts leak blood against the metal cuffs.

The idea in the back of her mind constantly was the relief that Marlene and Barrett were safe. Whether it was intentional to leave the two behind was unclear, but whatever her captors were up to, it involved her. And the more she dwelled on that, the more her thoughts cringed at the realisation that one man could be behind it all.

She still had the wound from their last meeting. And there was something between them that had never been settled.

Oh yes, there was definitely unfinished business remaining, still lingering from two years passed.

She could almost feel him already...

Watching.