Hey all, this is my first Lost fan fiction. Other then me it's been read by one other person who suggested I put it on

This is totally my own timeline, so it doesn't follow any of the eppies, and everyone is present and accounted for (Yay Claire!)

Mostly KJ with a little bit o CC But there's lots of other back-stories.

Disclaimer: I own nothing… So far

Pangs Of Guilt

Chapter 1

Getting away

Kate grabbed most of her clothes and stuffed them into the bottom of the backpack. She hurriedly began throwing other items into the bottom of the bag as well, tossing bunches of fruit into the middle of her blanket and adding that to the growing pile inside her bag. The last thing she added were fifteen bottles of water.

She quickly zipped up the bag and slew it over her shoulder, about to march away from her spot on the beach she looked down and noticed something sticking out, half buried in the sand. Bending down to pick it up, she realized what it was. Her mug shot, Jack had given it back to her when he had moved to the caves.

She sighed shaking her head. Just about to pace away and throw it back in the sand, she heard a voice behind her.

"Hi Kate," Walt greeted as he strolled up with Vincent on his leash.

She turned around quickly folding up her picture, "Hi Walt."

"Do you wanna play Frisbee with me and Vincent. We found one out by the caves, but it seems everyone is too busy to play," Walt explained holding up the vibrant red disk that reflected the dying sunlight.

"I'm sure your dad will play with you," Kate began adjusting her bag.

"No, he's busy making showers for the caves or something like that, Locke's gutting a boar, Charlie's watching Claire who's sleeping, Jack's sorting through supplies," he stopped there, not wanting to go any further.

"I'm sorry Walt," she apologized, "But I have to go for a little bit, I promise as soon as I get back I'll play Frisbee with you until one of us passes out from sheer exhaustion," she smiled, which willed a smile from the boy.

"Okay, where are you going?" he asked holding his beloved dogs leash in his hand.

"Just for a walk along the beach," she pointed downwards.

"Do you want me and Vincent to come protect you along the way? Mr. Locke showed me how to throw a knife a couple of days ago," he explained pulling a small knife out.

"Does your dad know you have that?" she asked looking at the knife.

"No, but he hasn't paid much attention to me," Walt replied placing the knife back onto his belt.

"Well you shouldn't use it yet then," Kate smiled, "Besides I'm going to be gone for awhile."

"Okay then," Walt replied as he turned around in the soft sandy shore and began walking away.

"Hey Walt," she called him, as she ran up to meet him, "Will you do me a favor?" she asked.

"Sure," he nodded in response.

She handed him the folded up picture, "Will you give this to Jack for me?" she asked.

"Okay," he replied placing the paper in his back pocket.

"But there is one catch, you can't open it up," she replied smiling deviously, "Because if you do, I'll know."

"Okay," he nodded, "I'll see you later." And with that, he and Vincent raced across the beach to make it back to the caves for their dinner.

Kate on the other hand, turned around in the sand and began to quickly make her way along the beach.

She didn't care about any 'monster'; she'd seen what it had done to the pilot first hand. But they hadn't heard from it since their first few days on the island. She desperately needed to get away, even if only for three of four days.

It wasn't that she didn't like them; even Sawyer could sometimes be bearable. But after being on her own for the past six years, not getting attached to anyone, it puts you into emotional shock, being forced to live alongside people you wouldn't have given the time of day to.

Everyone needed to depend on each other in order to survive, that's when her problems came in. She couldn't depend upon anyone, yet she was beginning to. Not only Jack, but everyone. She depended on Claire's hopeless optimism, and Hurley's sarcastic humor.

Jack, funny how she thought of Jack first before she thought of anyone else. The more she tried not to think about him, the more she had to. Which was the main reason she had to get away. Get away from it all; get away from the beach, from the caves, and from Jack.

She stopped for a moment and took off her shoes. If you could call them that, she had stolen them from a body lying on the beach. She preferred to think of it more as borrowing. The person couldn't very well use them anymore, and the word borrowing eased her mind.

She tied the laces together and hung them off her backpack. Looking out onto the horizon, she began to drag her feet carelessly into the sand. Kate took comfort in the fact that she could walk on the beach without having to worry about glass, or any other kind of garbage. She was far enough from the beach that she could take her time. She'd been walking for a few hours the sun had set.

Kate only stopped when she came to a rocky part of the beach. A mountain of piled boulders lay in front of her. She really didn't feel like climbing them, so she began to walk through the jungle around them. She found a clearing, and decided that this was a perfect place to rest for the night.

The ground was a mixture of sand and soft soil, covered in various leaves from the lush foliage covering the area. She leaned herself against a fallen tree and removed the airplane blanket she had taken from the bag, and used it for a pillow. She closed her eyes and slowly drifted to sleep.

The group sat around the fire, which had recently been started. Supper had been a huge success, it seemed Locke had excellent luck, and managed to get two piglets instead of the usual one.

Michael continued working on his drawings for making life more civilized on the island. Walt sat next to him, bored out of his mind. He spun the Frisbee between his hands, while his dog lay beside him, his eyes never off the spinning toy. Usually Walt would be talking to Claire, it was usually his job to keep an eye on her. Although they probably only gave him a job to keep him out of trouble.

But Charlie seemed to be more into watching out for Claire then he was. Walt didn't mind, at first he loved the idea of being able to explore the island. But he soon came to realize that even though his dad was always busy, he still knew when he did stuff he wasn't supposed to.

Suddenly Claire placed a hand to her expanded stomach and winced. Charlie looked up from playing his guitar and stared at her.

"Everything okay, Love?" he asked as he placed the guitar to his side and focused on Claire.

"Yeah," she replied, "I guess the baby didn't like tonight's dinner is all. He's putting up quite a fuss."

"Maybe you should go lie down then?" he asked. When she nodded he helped her out of her seat, and to her resting area.

Walt watched them as they walked into a cave, but his sight was side tracked when he heard rustling sounds coming from the brush. For a moment everyone stopped what they were doing and remained perfectly still. Only when Jack and Hurley emerged from the trees did everyone continue what they were doing.

Locke looked up from sharpening a spear, "Were you able to give the people on the beach some of our food?" he asked.

"Yeah, Boone was especially grateful. All Shannon did was complain. That's one thing I don't miss about being on the beach," Hurley explained taking a seat on a log by the fire.

"We managed to give food to everyone except for Kate," Jack explained as he added more wood to the fire.

"She is a vegetarian is she not?" asked Locke who once again began whittling down the spear.

"We couldn't even find her," Hurley added as he searched for his Discman, "No one has seen her all day."

Locke looked to Jack and instantly saw the worry he was masking, "I'm sure she's fine," he said.

"But this isn't like Kate, she wouldn't just leave," Jack replied.

Walt looked up when he heard her name being mentioned, she was going to kill him, he forgot to give Jack the piece of paper she'd asked him to deliver. He got up from his spot from beside him father.

"Walt, where are you going, man?" Michael asked looking up from his drawings for the first time that night.

"I'm just going to go talk to the doctor, and Mr. Locke," he told his father.

"All right, but don't you go into that jungle," he cautioned.

"I know," he replied and trekked over to where the guys were conversing.

"I asked Sawyer," he heard Jack answer Locke, "but he wouldn't give me a straight answer."

"Don't worry Jack, what goes around comes around," Locke enlightened.

Jack was about to reply but Walt approached.

"Something wrong Walt?" Locke asked helpfully, something told Walt he knew that he had something to say.

"Are you guys talking about Kate," He asked.

"Yeah, apparently no one has seen her all day," Jack replied taking a drink from his water bottle.

"I have," Walt, answered him. Jack put down his water and focused in on Walt so fast that he was amazed, he continued, "I saw her just before sunset. She was on the beach and I wanted to know if she'd play Frisbee with Vincent and I. She said she was too busy and that she was going for a walk down the beach that way," Walt gestured left, "All her stuff was packed and I asked if we should go with her to protect her, she said she'd be gone for a couple of days, but she would be back."

Jack shook his head and stood from his seat, "She knows better then to venture out into the jungle when that thing is still loose."

"She seems to be fine with that idea," Locke added still continuing to whittle.

"That's just because…" The roar of the monster cut off Jack. It was dulled and far away, but it could be easily identified.

Jack exchanged glances with Locke, and began quickly gathering items that he might need. He was about to leave camp when Locke stopped him, "If you're going after her, you might need this," he exclaimed handing him a knife.

Jack looked at it for a few seconds, and then hesitantly accepted it.

"Before you go doctor," Walt stopped him also, "She wanted me to give you this," he handed Jack the folded piece of paper.

Jack looked at him questioningly, "Don't worry," he began, "I didn't look at it, Kate didn't want me to."

With that he turned and went back to his father. Jack looked at the creased paper, and opened it carefully. When he recognized her in the picture he smiled, but that quickly faded off his face when he noticed the emotion in her face.

He folded up the paper once again and placed it in his left shirt pocket, right over his heart, and he left the camp with a running start.

There you have the first chapter, boring I might admit, but I promise you, the next chapters are way better. And I have about 20 written, so just tell me if you want me to update