Chotto Ippuku

Chapter 1: If You Give a Drunken Man Cider

Damda Mooda's cooking went, in general, one way or another. As one might put it, when it was good, it was decent, and when it was bad, it was deadly.

The basic problem was not that he just couldn't cook (much like a certain Menodix that shall go unnamed), nor was it the fact that his wife was to blame (which isn't much of a fact, for his wife was dead and he probably thought she was just on a long vacation).

In fact, there was only one problem, and, as luck would have it, it took him forty years to notice.

It was the cider.

Drinking too much or too little (by dependency's standards) caused his hands to shake, and he'd mess up the measurements. Whether this was for better or worse really depended on the recipe.

After yet another mistake resulting in him spending a full night praying to the porcelain god, he decided it was time to fix this problem.

Unfortunately, the Elicoorian version of Alcoholics Anonymous was non-existant. So he got drunk that night.

The next day, he woke up hungover and created another nasty (and potentially deadly) dish. To distract himself from the pain, he got drunk. Again.

When he woke up, he threw the cider out the window (luckily it only hit Sophia), vowing to never drink again. Feeling better, he finally made something good.

In celebration, as was expected, he got drunk after finding another bottle of cider.

By then, he'd fallen into a predictable pattern, one that can be described as follows:

If you give a drunken man cider, he'll want more.

And more.

And more.

And more…

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Completed: 1.31.05

Yay for pointless SO3 fics. I just love the NPC inventors, so I had to write about them (in the order they appear in in the game guide). Ya, if you could tell, I'm really not a big Sophia fan. She just kinda…scares me. 0.0

Anyway, I don't own SO3. Thanks for reading, and please review. Ja!

Kyone