AN) Yeah so I really have no excuse for not having this done, feel free to hunt me down and torture me. I know it's been way to long and to top it off this chapter isn't even that good, but it definitely shouldn't be this long till the next update. Thanks to everyone who's reading this fic and I'm sorry I've kept you waiting for so long. Anyway on to the story and enjoy.

Eiri and Tohma walked back into Shuichi's room, neither seemed to be surprised by the state it was in. Things were strewn about everywhere and Ryuichi had wallpapered the room with his pictures. The state of the people in the room was somewhat different. Shuichi lay sound asleep on the bed, Kumagoro wrapped tightly in his arms. Ryuichi on the other hand had a dark look on his face as he stared down at what Tohma recognized as the patient chart that had been left in the room.

Tohma walked up to him slowly he reached for the clipboard taking it from Ryuichi's grasp. Tohma set it on the table next to the bed and wrapped his arms loosely around his singer. Ryuichi was crying and buried his head in Tohma's chest in an effort to make sure he didn't wake the other singer. Eiri watched as Tohma lead Ryuichi from the room. He made sure Shuichi was asleep before he too exited closing the door behind him. The sight that greeted him in the hallway was unnerving. The Nittle Grasper singer was nearly hysteric, Eiri glanced around to find Hiro and Suguru had also reappeared.

"He was hurt that bad and I didn't even notice." Ryuichi sobbed into Tohma's shirt. Though he hadn't said it, it was more than obvious that the reason the singer was so upset was due to the guilt he felt over Shuichi's condition.

"It's not your fault Sakuma. If anyone's to blame it's me." Eiri said. The singer looked at him tears still clinging to his eyelashes. He didn't understand how this could possibly be the novelist fault.

"He called me and I didn't go get him. If I had, so much of this could have been avoided, it's my fault Shuichi's like this." Eiri's eyes never left the Grasper's. Ryuichi approached him, he could see Hiro out of the corner of his eye the guitarist was furious at this new revelation. Ryuichi's hand connected with Eiri's face before he knew what was going on.

"You really messed up, but because Shuichi loves you so much I'll forgive you this time. If you ever let him get hurt again though I'll make you pay." Ryuichi growled. Eiri was surprised by how scary the singer could be, he hated to say it but he preferred the personality that talked to the rabbit. Eiri nodded head down, Ryuichi looked over his shoulder to make sure Hiro wasn't coming up from behind the author with an ax. Though the guitarist still seemed to be angry he was simply standing with his arms crossed glaring at the authors back. It seemed he was satisfied with what had transpired with the singer and didn't need to add his own threats.

Tohma couldn't help but feel that on some level the author deserved this but his basic instinct was still to protect the other blond. "Well I think that's enough for today. Ryuichi we have work tomorrow and Shuichi needs his sleep."

The singer slumped as his eyes grew big and began to fill with tears again. "But Tohma I want to stay with Shu-chan till he's better!" He said in his child like way.

"Shuichi will be back in Tokyo soon and I promise you can visit him as much as you want when he gets back. He'll only be in the hospital a little longer." Tohma said.

Ryuichi nodded reluctantly and went to stand by Tohma, Suguru followed after giving his boyfriend a goodbye kiss. "Tell Shu I said bye, and to take care of Kuma for me till he gets back!" Ryuichi shouted down the hall as they left.

Eiri released a sigh he'd expected Hiro to pummel him. He turned to find the other had returned to Shuichi's room and was currently tidying it up. "Today wiped him out." Eiri stated situating Shuichi in the bed and picking crayons from the sheets as he did so.

"Yeah well after what he's been through it'll take a while for him get back to normal." Hiro said softly.

"Do you think he'll be okay?" Eiri asked looking at the red head.

Hiro looked at him then at the sleeping teen. He sighed as he tossed some blank paper on an extra chair that had been brought into the room. "I don't know. Last time it was right before we got signed to NG so he filled up his life with that. If I tried to ask him anything he'd just get angry and not talk to me for a week. I think he tries to pretend it didn't happen like that will make it go away. If he doesn't deal with this though I think there could be some serious issues in the future. Then again how 'okay' can a person be after having something like this happen to them?" Hiro ended, he wished silently that Shuichi would be fine.

Eiri contemplated the guitarist's words. He couldn't help drawing the connection of what had happened to him to what had happened to Shuichi. He sure as hell hadn't been 'okay' in fact the closest he'd been since that time was after Shuichi had entered his life. He couldn't help but think the singer would end up blaming him for what happened, hell he blamed himself. He just didn't want the teen to end up the way he had.

It wasn't long before a nurse appeared at the door carrying a tray with some food. Shuichi really hadn't eaten anything since he'd been up. That morning he had eaten a bit of oat meal but it wasn't even half the bowl. The nurse left the food on the table instructing them to make sure he ate something. Hiro went to his friend's side and gently woke him. Shuichi looked around groggily for a second. "Where's Ryuichi?" He asked.

"Everyone left while you were sleeping they didn't want to wake you up to say goodbye. Sakama left Kumagoro for you to take care of though." Hiro said indicating the bunny that Shuichi was currently laying on half of. Shuichi pulled the bunny out from under himself and smiled at it. He looked up from the bunny when he realized that Eiri had pulled the table over to his bed and set a tray of food down in front of him. He glanced over the meal, he was hungry but didn't think he could keep anything down. Eiri seemed to sense this and released a low growl.

"You're going to eat something." He stated looking for the most appetizing thing on the tray. There was what appeared to be chicken soup along with mashed potatoes and a small thing of orange jello.

"I'm not really very hungry." Shuichi said turning from the food.

"If you don't eat they'll keep you here longer. You want to go home don't you?" Hiro said. Shuichi turned to glare at him before turning to the tray of food. Shuichi picked up the spoon in his soup and began to take small sips. He couldn't help but feel uncomfortable with both Hiro and Eiri staring so intently at him as he ate. He managed to finish about half the bowl before his stomach began to hurt.

"Do you want some water?" Eiri asked getting up and moving the tray when it became obvious the singer didn't want anymore.

"Could I have some tea?" Shuichi asked looking up hopefully at the blond.

"I don't see why not let me go see if I can find some." Eiri moved to the door.

"Wait," Hiro said getting up and going after him, "I'll go you say here."

Eiri nodded and went to sit next to the singer again. Hiro gave Shuichi a smile as he left to search for tea. Shuichi leaned back into the pillows on the bed, he pulled Kumagoro into his embrace and hugged the bunny. A long time passed before anyone said anything Eiri was the first.

"What are you thinking about?" The author asked reaching a tentative hand out to touch the singers face. Shuichi jerked at the sudden contact causing Eiri to retract his hand. Shuichi reached out and grabbed it before Eiri had pulled completely away though. Shuichi tugged the hand back forward and put it to his cheek trying to show the older man that he wasn't afraid.

"I'm sorry Eiri I didn't mean to jump." He said softly.

"Don't apologize it's not your fault." Eiri replied, letting his fingers caress Shuichi's face. "You feel a bit warm, you might be coming down with something." The novelist stated. He brought his other hand up to rest against the singer's forehead to check for a fever.

Shuichi released an irritated groan, "I don't want to get sick they'll keep me here even longer. I just want to go home." He said quietly, tapering off at the end. "I mean I understand if you don't want to take care of me anymore Eiri. After everything that's happened I can understand why you wouldn't." Shuichi was cut off abruptly as Eiri's lips pressed against his. The singers eyes widened in shock as he stared into the narrowed eyes of the author.

It was a simple chaste kiss and it lasted only seconds before Eiri pulled away slightly. His left hand had slipped behind the singer's head to hold him in place while he used the thumb on his right to stroke the singer's cheek.

"The one you should be mad at is me. I could have come and helped you yet I didn't and all because of my stupid pride! You're hurt and it's all my fault" Eiri was cut off by Shuichi's fingers on his lips the teen was glaring at him angrily. Nothing was said for some time.

"I want you to come home Shuichi, and I never want you to leave again." Eiri stated eyes boring into Shuichi's.

"Home I want to go home too." Shuichi said. He leaned up wrapping his arms around Eiri.

Eiri held him close as well loving the feel of Shuichi's warm body next to his, it was comforting and reassuring. Eventually Eiri settled Shuichi back into the bed and watched as the singer pulled the stuffed bunny Sakuma had left behind back into his grasp.

Hiro walked back into the room a few moments later with three cans of tea. "I had to go all the way down to the lobby and this is all they had I guess you'll just have to make due." Hiro said tossing a can to Yuki and handing one to Shuichi on the bed.

"Thanks Hiro you're a real pal." Shuichi said smiling at him. The teen released a sigh as he sipped on the now luke warm beverage. "I really hope they let me out soon this place gets me down."

"Well even if you do get out soon the doctor said there would be restrictions on what you could and couldn't eat until your stomach is healed. So if food is your sole reason for wanting to get out don't get your hopes up to high." Hiro said laughing a little as he did. Shuichi simply pouted at him then turned pleading eyes to Eiri.

"Don't look at me I'm not going to give you any food you're not supposed to have once we get home. You wouldn't want to have to come back here again would you?" Eiri joked.

Shuichi cringed chuckling a little as he went back to his tea. Though the mood in the room seemed to have improved Eiri couldn't help but feel that it was being forced by all parties. Shuichi could act fine for all he was worth but there was still something wrong something that Eiri couldn't place. He shrugged it off when Shuichi began to complain about being bored and wanting to watch some TV.

For the next hour or so the three of them sat watching television and making small talk. A nurse finally came and took the leftover tray of food away then returned with a syringe containing a pain reliever and something to help Shuichi sleep.

Shuichi tried to fight off the medicine as long as he could but went out a little over ten minutes later. Though neither of them were watching it Eiri nor Hiro moved to turn the TV off then decided against it, it simply seemed to buzz on in the background forgotten.

"Something's wrong." Eiri stated bluntly waiting for Hiro's reply. The guitarist's gaze slowly traveled to Eiri though he said nothing.

"A lot of things are wrong do you thing you could be a little more specific?" Hiro said.

"I mean that there was something wrong with Shuichi's behavior today. It was all an act; I'm just afraid that he's not going to deal with what happened and try to brush it off. I realize that he went on pretending after the first time but it's not going to work this time, it didn't the first. He needs to deal with what happened talk about it cry or get angry but not jut sit there like its fine." Eiri's voice had grown steadily darker and he seemed unnecessarily angry.

"Perhaps its not just Shuichi who has something that he needs to talk about. You seem pretty on edge yourself Yuki-san." Hiro said, noting how the writer's shoulders stiffened at his suggestion.

"This isn't about me this is about Shuichi, it has nothing to do with me." Eiri tapered off at the end realizing what he'd just said.

Hiro glared at the author before offering his next reply. "It's about the both of you, Shuichi when through this last time practically alone. I tried my best but he didn't want to worry me, it'll be the same with you probably worse. He doesn't want to cause problems and even though it's not his fault none of it he'll still blame himself. You're the only one who can help him, Seguchi-san, Sakuma-san, me none of us can help no matter how had we try. You're the one he wants help from now the question is, are you prepared to handle it? That's what this is about is it not Yuki-san? You already got your closer, at least as far as Aizawa is concerned, but what about Shuichi? How are you going to handle him once you get home neither of us knows what's going to happen but you'll be the one he's depending on." Hiro let out a sigh as he turned back to the glowing television. "What I'm saying is how are you going to help him deal with something that you couldn't possibly understand his position on?"

Eiri didn't say anything as he turned away from the room toward the window. It was obvious that Hiro was frustrated just as much as he was, perhaps more so since he felt there was nothing he could do. But Eiri didn't want to think that he was the only one who could do anything he didn't want this all placed on him because he was sure he was going to fail. Being pessimistic had become a life style for Eiri and it was one that was going to be hard to get out of.

Hiro went to bed not long after their little discussion. Eiri didn't mind he didn't think he'd be getting too much sleep tonight anyway, his mind was going a mile a minute.

The next day proved to be much more peaceful than the day before. When the nurse came to give Shuichi a sponge bath he begged to take a real bath. She agreed to getting the doctor to see if it was okay for him to be taken off the IV so he could shower. The doctor appeared after awhile to do a check up, and see if taking Shuichi off the IV was a possibility.

"I'll need to do a thorough exam before I'll okay this, you're still in a very delicate stage and I don't want anything to happen that might prolong your hospitalization. Just because you're feeling better doesn't mean that you are." The doctor stated.

Eiri was standing out of the way his presence going unnoticed when the doctor ushered Hiro and all but his head nurse from the room so he could examine Shuichi. He didn't notice the blond man until the nurse brought Eiri to the doctor's attention.

"Sir if you would please just wait outside until this is over, it won't be that long."

"Shuichi if you don't mind I'd like to stay." Eiri said, standing beside his lover and taking his hand. "If you'd rather I leave I will though."

"No I-I want you to stay Eiri just don't hate me." Shuichi said his eyes were glassed over with unshed tears.

"I'll never hate you, I just want to be here for you." Eiri whispered and squeezed the singers hand as reassuringly as he could.

"It's against protocol to have someone else here like this." The doctor wasn't able to finish his explanation though Shuichi cut him off.

"I understand but I don't care I want him here for this otherwise I'll just take the damn IV out myself once you've left." Shuichi threatened.

The doctor sighed why did he have to deal with such unreasonable people? "Fine but I could get fired for this."

"Neither of us are going to say anything besides I want him here." Shuichi said as firmly as his quivering voice would allow.

"Well let's get your pulse first then." The doctor said. Shuichi sat up on the bed breathing and exhaling as he was told to, while the doctor listened to his heart. "Your heart seems perfectly fine, how are your ribs still painful I'm sure but do you think you'll be able to stand?"

Shuichi nodded his head yes and waited.

"Here I'd like you to stand for at least one minute before getting back on the bed on your stomach. I'm not going to agree to remove the IV if you aren't well enough." The doctor and Eiri then helped Shuichi off the bed, both moved away slowly ready to catch the teen if he began to fall.

Shuichi's legs were a little shaky at first from lack of use be he quickly gained his balance and had no problem standing, it was the moving to get back on the bed that was difficult. His ribs ached as he lay on them and his stomach disapproved of the new position. He had finally gotten as comfortable as he could when the doctor began to pull open the back of his hospital gown. "What are you doing?" The boy cried.

"I'm sorry I should have warned you I just want to do a quick exam and make sure the bleeding has stopped. I should have warned you it will only take a second I just want to make sure that you're healing properly." The doctor waited till it seemed Shuichi had calmed down before he continued.

Eiri moved so that he was standing against the wall near the head Shuichi's bed. He reached out and held the pink haired boy's hand trying to comfort him as much as possible. The doctor was as quick and discreet as possible and before Shuichi had a chance to get himself real worked up it was over.

"You seem to be healing fine." The doctor said pulling a blanket up to cover Shuichi for the time being. "Since you seem to be feeling up to it I'll go ahead and take the IV out on one condition. I want you to make sure you drink a glass of water or anything else that's healthy every two hours, I also want you to eat at every meal or whenever you feel hungry if I find you haven't been eating then I'll have the IV put back in and keep you here even longer. At this rate assuming you're doing this well tomorrow you may be able to go home the day after next."

Shuichi looked at Eiri hopefully then turned back and offered his thanks the doctor. He turned back over carefully then waited while the doctor removed the IV from his arm and had him hold a bandage against it till it stopped bleeding.

"There you go now if you want I can have a nurse assist you with your shower, or if your guardian is willing too he can instead."

"I'd rather Eiri helped me, if you don't mind." Shuichi said looking at the author.

"It's fine I'm more than capable of helping him." Came Eiri's curt reply.

The doctor was just to the door when he turned around with the chart in his hand. "I'd forgotten about your sprung wrist how is it doing?"

Moving his hand Shuichi only felt a bit of pain when he tried to bend it back very far. "I don't think its bad it doesn't hurt very much anymore, but if it starts I'll be sure to tell you." The doctor nodded and then left.

Shuichi relaxed a little when everyone but Eiri finally left the room, he'd been terrified that the doctor might want to do a painful examination he was glad he didn't.

Helping Shuichi to his feet Eiri guided the singer to the small bathroom with and even tinnier shower. Shuichi frowned a bit when he realized there was hardly enough room for him to stand in it.

"Hey I know it's not home but it's better than a sponge, besides the first thing you can do when we get back is take a bath if you want." Eiri said. He turned the water on in the shower and got it warm; he knew Shuichi liked hot showers because the boy usually looked like a cooked lobster when he got out. Eiri helped him take the hospital gown off. He'd seen the singer's injuries before when Shuichi was getting his sponge baths but to see him standing there bruised and hurt it was awful. Shuichi turned and faced the water letting it stream down his body. Eiri took the small bar of soap the hospital provided and helped Shuichi get soaped off. He used a travel size bottle of shampoo and washed the singers hair for him, once his hair was good and clean Shuichi rinsed off. Eiri bundled him up in a towel once he'd stepped out of the shower. It was obvious the teen was fatigued Eiri got a fresh hospital gown and tied it for the singer then helped him back into the bed.

"If you go to sleep with your hair damp it's going to look awful when you wake up." Eiri said sitting on the edge of the bed and running his hand through the wet locks.

"I must look pretty awful anyway some bad hair can't make it too much worse." Shuichi said with a slight smile. He fought as hard as he could to keep his eyes open but he was just too tired.

Eiri watched him sleep for a few minutes then got up from the bed. He reached down and moved the blankets over the sleeping figure. For a second he began to pull away but the sleeping boy looked to cute and he placed a soft kiss on his forehead before leaving the room to find the guitarist, he'd been missing most the day.

Shuichi woke to find his hospital room empty. He could hear voices talking outside his door and he was sure he could make out Eiri's voice. Getting out of the bed he slowly stood and walked toward the door. He opened it to find Eiri, Hiro, and the psychiatrist talking with one another.

"So you decided to wake up. You've been sleeping all day from what I hear." She said smiling at Shuichi softly. Shuichi didn't say anything and just looked suspiciously from one person to another.

"Why don't we talk for awhile, since you'll be going home soon I'd like to make sure you're going to be okay." Natsumi said entering his room. Shuichi gave one last glace at Eiri before turning back and going to get in his bed. Natsumi closed the door and took a seat next to his bed.

"Is there anything you'd like to talk about?" She asked softly.

"What not going to pick at my brain until I break?" Shuichi replied sarcastically.

"Not today I thought maybe we could just talk for a while and if you felt like telling me anything that's fine, or we can just talk about the weather. I don't mind so go ahead and start." Natshumi set her note pad on the floor, as though she was trying to tell Shuichi she wasn't here to analyze him.

Sighing Shuichi sat up in the bed and leaned back against his pillow. He pulled Kumagoro into his lap and began to idly play with the bunny.

"Has Yuki said anything to you about me?" He asked after awhile still playing with the bunny.

"Yuki-san had mentioned his concern for your well being, he's very worried about your reluctance to talk to anybody about what's happening now and what happened in the past. He wants you to talk to him, I know it will take time but I'm sure one day the two of you will be able to share your secrets."

Shuichi shot the doctor a look. "He already knows my secret."

"But he doesn't know what you're thinking or feeling, he's just as lost as you are right now. He cares deeply for you and I know you care back. I think what's bothering Yuki-san the most is his fear that you're going to try to deal with this yourself, he desperately wants to be a part of the healing process."

Shuichi made a sound of disbelief. 'Eiri didn't realize that he was already helping just by being there.'

"He wants you to trust in him completely but he's going to have to learn to put the same trust on you, but I think in time it will happen." She paused then continued on a different topic. "So I heard that Ryuichi Sakuma was one of the people who visited you the other day, how did that go?"

Shuichi smiled and began to relay the events to her becoming more exited as he went on. Without realizing it he started openly talking with her until Yuki knocked coming in with a tray of food. Shuichi grinned at him and began to eat slowly.

"Well it's been a pleasure talking to you Shindou-san, I'm sure things are going to get better. Take care of yourself and make sure to talk to someone if you need to, it's the best way to resolve anything." She said looking at Yuki as she said the last part, then bowing she exited the room.

"What did you talk about?" Eiri asked sitting down in a chair.

"Nothing much." Shuichi said continuing to eat. "You trust me don't you Eiri?" He asked suddenly the surprised look on Eiri's face showed he was caught totally off guard by the question.

Eiri blinked a few times then looked away. "Yeah of course I trust you."

Shuichi frowned then turned back to his food, Eiri didn't trust him it was obvious because of the way he answered. Shuichi tried to eat more but the sudden realization made him lose his appetite and he set his chopsticks down with a sigh. He pushed the tray away and laid down getting as comfortable in the hospital bed as he could, he didn't understand why Eiri wouldn't trust him. It was with troublesome thoughts that Shuichi slowly drifted to sleep that night.