Singles Awareness Day

By: Chibi

This is my final conclusion. The world. Hates. Me. Not just some random country you only hear about in game shows, nope, the entire world. One day, one part of the world said, we hate Urameshi Yusuke. The other part of the world looked surprised, then said, oh my god we totally hate Urameshi Yusuke too! Then they threw a huge party where they discussed ways to make my life hell. And finally, one part of the world said to the other part of the world, to make his life hell, insert dramatic pause here, we should make him work at a card store on Valentine's Day. Insert evil laughter and there you go.

Why else would I be standing behind the counter of some tiny card shop in the mall that's completely decorated in blinding pinks and reds? A card shop full of kissy faced bears, heart shaped boxes of chocolate, and let's not forget the five hundred million cards that all say I love you in five hundred million different ways. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. Oi, give me a freakin' break! And here I thought this would be an easy job for a slacker like me. Card store in the mall. What you get two, three people per day looking for birthday cards or some crap like that. But I had forgotten about the evils of Singles Awareness Day. Yes, Singles Awareness Day. Valentine's Day is for men armed with girlfriends who make those supposedly cute please, please get me that bear sounds. And men who eagerly buy said bear and receive a pat on the back called you are such a good boyfriend! Insert many hugs and kisses. Yep, the world hates me. One side of the world is laughing with the other side of the world as they share those damn chocolates in those damn heart shaped boxes.

As I stand there wondering if it's possible to die from working in a card store on today of all days a group of girls walk up to the counter. Each one is giggling and going on and on about how this is the perfect, no take that back, the perfect, card for the jock, the trumpet player, and the junior class president. Gods, why me? What did I ever do to deserve this? Is this because I beat people up all the time? Is this because I sleep when I should be in class? I-I get tired, I'm sorry! Just because I sleep through all of my classes doesn't mean I deserve... deserve this! But I just sigh and ring each girl up, trying hard to tune out the squealing sound only girls can make.

"Happy Valentine's Day" One of the girls say to me. I blink at her and just give her one of those customer service smiles. You know the ones that say I get paid to do this, that's why I'm smiling. "It's too bad you have to work. Your girlfriend must miss a cutie like you." Oh no. Oh no no no not this, anything but this.

The happy-to-have-a-boyfriend-but-still-flirty girl. Dum dum dummmmm.

"I don't have a girlfriend." I mutter, taking the money she gives me.

"What" The second girl in the group says, looking absolutely surprised. "What girl wouldn't want a nice looking boy like you"

"I'm not nice." I say to respond to her, putting their cards in bags. Though I thought everyone already knew that I wasn't a nice boy. I figured the slicked back hair, the fishnet long sleeved shirt, the combat boots, and the baggy pants with enough chains around the belt loops to strangle annoying love sick customers... hey... now that's an idea...

The last girl in the group looks over my outfit. A while ago I decided to take off the stupid little apron they give us to wear because if I had to work today of all days then damnit, I was gonna be comfortable doing it. Not like my boss cared... his wife had come to visit him and hasn't been out that backroom yet. Happy fucking Valentine's Day to him. I hear the last girl whisper something about goth and bad boy and I have to resist the urge to roll my eyes. What's with girls liking this bad boy image thing? Go and give your cards to the jock, trumpet player, and junior class president.

No, they're still staring at me even after I hand them their bags with our goofy store logo on them. According to their whispers I've gone from nice looking to hot, wow, lucky me. "Um... thank you, have a nice day." Maybe saying that will make them leave but instead they giggle, in sync, like most friends do.

"Some girl would be lucky to have you as a boyfriend."

"That's great..." I say to the first girl. "... good thing I'm bi, because then maybe I can meet a guy who isn't as annoying as you." Her face falls, I mean, it completely crumbles. Score one for me.

"I was just being nice" She screams out, and her eyes water like a spoiled little girl who just received a baby doll with blue eyes instead of green.

"And I told you I'm not nice." She makes some kind of angry sound and stomps out the store with the other two girls with her. "Happy Singles Awareness Day" I shout to them as they leave. I hear one of them say something along the lines of, no wonder he's single, he's such a... a... an ass, girl, just say the word! But she doesn't, she just holds it inside the pit of her stomach.

I pray that maybe the world will go easy on me and give me a couple to deal with instead of a group of girls. I can deal with a couple staring into each other's eyes and exchanging kisses when they think I'm not looking. Well, I don't get a couple exactly. I do get two guys, don't get your hopes up, they aren't together. Typical buff guys who probably wouldn't remember it was Valentine's Day if it wasn't for that thing in their pants whispering to them, get that hot girl with the big breasts something, idiot, because then she'll be all over you! This is my official announcement to all the women who ask why men are so stupid. I. Don't. Know.

"She's gonna love this." Buff Guy A says as he hands me a teddy bear. Hn. Cheap bastard is going for the cheapest bear on the shelf! Ding ding ding, he won't be gettin' any! Now if I were a caring person I would suggest to the young gentlemen a nicer looking bear, maybe one that's holding a box of chocolates. Too bad I don't give a damn. So I just ring him up and hand him his bear. Then Buff Guy B comes up to the counter and hands me... the same exact bear. Ow, my head hurts from the level of stupidity I've just experienced.

"I can't wait to give this to that one chick." Oh gods, not the referring to women as chicks. That's pathetic. "I'm gonna invite her over to my place tonight and..." Insert stupid looking smirk from Buff Guy B who looks up at me as if saying, you know what I mean, right? I just take his money and hand him his bag. Please mommy, make the hurting in my head stop. This can't possibly get any worse.

"Oh wow, check her out. She's hot" Oh crap, it just did. Buff Guy A and B seem to have noticed a quote, unquote, hot chick. Just because I have nothing else to do I turn my attention to the one the buff guys are drooling over.

Then I just stare. Wait a minute...

"Hey! Hey baby" Buff Guy A says confidently, as if he's spouting out the best poetry ever written. "Why don't you come over here and spend some time with me." Usually I wouldn't say anything, but this time I just have to, just to have the fun pleasure of crushing their spirits.

"Um... I'd hate to break this to you but..." I look back over at the hot chick and watch said hot chick look over all the boxes of chocolate we carry. Long red hair, pretty green eyes, matching green turtle neck and a pair of jeans that just say yes, I'm gorgeous, thanks for noticing. "... that's a guy." I try to hold it back but I can't. I smirk, smirk pretty evilly at that. They both look over at their hot chick and die. Unfortunately, they don't literally die. Instead they both do something along the lines of gagging, and in a total display of true male friendship one says to the other, you hit on a dude, you fag! This of course causes them both to walk out the store pushing each other around. As I watch them I'm thankful once again that I'm bi. Because maybe I could meet some girl that was much smarter than that.

I turn my attention to the guy formally known as hot chick and notice that he's giggling about the entire situation. It's a nice little laugh, one of those laughs that sticks to your heart and won't let go. It's my fault, really, when I think about it. I could've tuned the laugh out but I didn't, I let it stick to my heart and I didn't even try to remove it. Then I do something really stupid. I keep looking at him, looking at him for so long that he has time to look up at me and smile.

I am the last person who would ever believe in bullshit like rose petals falling, or bubbles and sparkles appearing, but I swear, I swear to any god that's up there that is exactly what I saw. Since when were smiles that beautiful? Who decided to make smiles look that nice? Isn't it bad enough that the guy is the posterboy for damn good looking? This guy is the type of guy who you take one look at and suddenly have to find something to cover the lower half of your body with. Thankfully I have an entire counter. I guess it's not really fair, I get to watch him from a safe distance and let my mind fall completely into a gutter as my eyes move over him. I bet everyone outside wished they had a counter to hide behind when he was walking towards this store. I wonder how many people had to suddenly cross their legs from where they were sitting, suddenly had to sit that good book they were reading in their laps, run to the bathroom and come up with naughty images of a hot red head in there with them. I never really thought orgasms could walk, but I guess they can.

I watch him pick up a rather large box of chocolate. Damn, guess he isn't cheap like the two buff bozos who just left. His partner's lucky. My mind has already concluded that this creature has to be at least bi, just has to be. O.K. Rephrase. My mind hopes that this creature is bi, just has to be. Doesn't really matter I guess since he is buying candy for someone. Soon he walks up to the counter, looking over the box one more time before he hands it to me, looking a bit unsure. "I can never tell which kind to get." Damnit! Damnit damnit, did everything have to be hot about this guy? Voice too? It was like this soft, playful, phone sex like voice. He could read the phone book and bring a person to their knees. "Sometimes I get the wrong kind and end up not liking half of them."

Speak, Yusuke. Hot guy talking to you"Well... this kind says what they are on the side of the box."

"Really" He takes the box away from me and looks at it, his eyes lighting up. Ha ha ha ha ha, I made him happy"Well it looks like I picked the right kind. I like all of these." He hands me back the box and I look over it, nodding a bit.

"They all are really good. I've had them before."

"Oh? Shared with a boyfriend"

I cough a bit at that. "Boyfriend? Um... no, I'm single. What made you think it was a boyfriend"

"Because someone good looking like you has to be at least bi. At least, my mind hoped that you were bi." Oh I have to do it. I smirk at him, not quite ringing up the box of chocolate yet.

"Funny. I was thinking the same about you." He smiles back at me. "But you're not single, you can't be."

"Why can't I be"

"You're too pretty to be single. Besides, you're buying a box of candy on Valentine's Day."

"Singles Awareness Day." He says to correct me.

"Right, Singles Aware... ness..." My voice trails off and I just stare at him. Single... he's single... holy shit he's single! The world that hates me is groaning because something good has happened to Urameshi Yusuke. Ha! Screw you, hateful world"So... who is the candy for"

"Myself. I just like this type of candy, so I buy some for myself on Singles Awareness Day."

I think for a moment and hand him the box. "Here, take it. It's yours."

"But, I have to pay..."

"Naw. It's on me. To someone else who celebrates Singles Awareness Day." He looks down at the box and smiles again before he pulls the plastic from around it and removes the top. Damn, that's a lot of chocolate. Chocolate filled with more chocolate, with nuts, with strawberries, with vanilla, with caramel... he really does go all out for the day.

"Thank you." He pushes the box towards me. "How about we share it to celebrate the day."

"Careful." I take one of the pieces of chocolate and pop it in my mouth, grinning. "If we share it we could almost, almost be considered as not being single."

"Not necessarily." He says as he puts a piece of candy in his mouth. "We're just two single people eating candy together. Besides, if we weren't single and were together we'd have to do that whole getting to know each other thing."

"Ah. Good point."

"So..." He gets a bit of chocolate on his lips and slowly licks it away. Fuck, that was a cruel thing to do to my hormones. "... can we get to know each other better" Sneaky sneaky, he brings that up after he brings more attention to those lips that beg to be kissed.

"Well... only if..."

"Hm"

"... you tell me your name."

"Careful." He says to me. "If I tell you and we get to know each other we could almost, almost be considered as not being single."

"Not necessarily. We're just two single people eating candy together and having conversation." I say with a grin that makes him laugh.

"Kurama." He holds his hand out towards me.

"Yusuke." I shake his hand and hold it a little longer than necessary, but it doesn't seem to bother him. "Who, unfortunately, will be working for a couple more hours."

"That's o.k." He sits up on the edge of the counter, swinging his legs cutely as he eats more chocolate. "I don't have anything else to do. I'm single." And at that moment I wonder what the big hype about Valentine's Day is when Singles Awareness Day let you meet people like Kurama. Maybe the world doesn't hate me as much as I thought it did.

Then... two girls walk into the store dragging their boyfriends inside with them, the girls pointing at several things they want their boyfriends to buy them. Both Kurama and I groan.

"Sometimes." We both say as we eat another chocolate piece. "I think the world hates me."

Owari