Chippy

Disclaimer: I do not own Phantom of the Opera, I don't even own the computer I'm writing this fic on, (once I owned a cat, but even that was taken from me!)

Author's Note: This is THE REAL Maidenhair. I am withdrawing my sister from using my name anymore. (I DID NOT write that Les Mis POTO fic!)

My dear reader,

This is not your ordinary POTO fan-fic. It is not the usual dribble about a fop, a freak, and a ditsy singer and their impassioned stupidity, this is a true story. This is a story of sorrow and work. This is the never before told tale of Chippy, the opera squirrel. It is not a happy tale, and it will fill you with woe. But read it, you should! For poor Chippy has waited long enough! This is his story now, as it was told to me through a crack in the floor of my private opera box.

I was watching the opera Faust by Gounod at the time. A rather pretty singer named Christine Daae was performing Margarita with lack-luster acting. It was in the jewel song that it happened.

"Hello?" came a small, squeaky voice.

"Hmm?" I asked.

"Um, this is my private box." The voice stated.

"Oh dear!" I said, "I'm sorry, but I was given this box. There must have been an err!"

"Figures." The voice said, "Just my luck!"

He sounded sad, so I asked, "My dear sir, is there anything wrong?"

"Yes." He said, and I suddenly noticed that the speaker was a small, gray squirrel that was sitting on the banister.

"Oh, hello there!" I exclaimed.

"Hi." He said, wiping a tear.

"Dear me, Mr. Squirrel! You DO seem sad! Might you tell me what is wrong?"

"Do you want to hear?" he asked.

"Of course! I'm always around for poor little animals!" I said. So he began:

Chippy's Story:

Well, I'm Chippy, the Squirrel of the Opera. Once I inspired terror and romance in the opera singers and patrons with my antics. I was great! It wore a cape, and a tux, and I was known everywhere for my brilliant escapes from the Parisian pest control. I was number one! Ballet girls told tales of me, singers fainted at my sight, managers gave me all I demanded, and I was happy. Sniffle! Then it all went wrong!

It was the fifteenth of August, (I remember it because it was my birthday,) when it happened. I was writing a letter to the managers asking in my fuzzy way for a box of crackers when HE came!

He was very tall for a human, and he was wet. That's how I most remember him, tall and wet. He also seemed a tad-bit paranoid, and he twitched. He creped into the opera, (MY OPERA!) and I could see that something was afoot. The reasons for my suspicions were two: One, he went into the cellars. No ORDINARY patron goes there! It is MY private domain, or at least, it WAS my domain. Two, he carried a large suitcase. It doesn't take a rocket squirrel to see that the man was moving in!

Now, don't get me wrong, humans are a tolerable species. But really! This was MY home! MINE! And I didn't want to share it with a man, (particularly one who was wet!)

At first we were able to coexist in peace and harmony. However, I watched his actions closely to see if he was of the hostile kind or not. It is hard to tell with humans. One day they can seem as sweet as sugar, another day their off starting a world war! Well, I watched him. I found out a lot about him from those days of observance, and I kept a scientific journal of what I observed were his behaviors.

I decided he was a water species, because he seemed to find the underground lake irresistible. He also seemed to be a nocturnal species; I noted this from the strange color and glow of his yellow eyes. He was altogether too thin, which led me to believe that he may be diseased. However I noticed that he had strength to him, because he was often running without stop for long periods of time.

All went well until the singing began. At first I believe it was simply his natural territorial calls, but then the call distinctly changed. It was a courtship call! And he was after a female!

I found the female. She was a small species, with yellow plumage and blue eyes. It was an interesting pattern of behavior that I witnessed. He, singing and flirting, she flirting and flirting. However, she was not of the loyal species. She soon lost interest in him for another human of the same plumage as her own. I was fascinated! I was able to watch the female's ENTIRE courtship routine! But then, tragedy struck!

I was scampering along the hall when I decided to listen to the usual gossip about myself that the ballet girls were bandying. I listened, and –to my horror- the conversation was about me! It was about some Phantom! I was replaced! I was no longer number one! I was forgotten!

Chippy ended his tale with choked sobs.

"Poor fellow!" I said sympathetically.

"And to think! It was the very human species that I had been observing that had replaced me!" Chippy growled.

"POOR FELLOW!" I said again.

"Well, I won't be the 'poor fellow' forever! Today I reek my vengeance!" Chippy quoth this, and scampered away.

Just then, the lights went out! When they relit, the mediocre singer, Christine Daae, was gone. Only a handful of nuts remained.

The end.

Please review and tell Chippy that you love him.