Yes, I have decided that this will be my last chapter for this story. I really don't know where I would want to take it outside of what I want the outcome of the season finale to be when the show returns so basically this will be a little bit of a closer.
Luke once asked me whether or not I would want to talk to my parents again. I couldn't answer at the time; my emotions were too all over the place to really give an answer that I would actually mean and follow up on. So, like the gullible fool I am, I returned to my parent's home to reestablish communication and hope that things would be different this time. It should have hit me at one point that I did the same thing with them that I did with Chris: I allowed them to get close and hurt me, back off for a while, and then let them back in again thinking that things would change and that it would all work out. Everytime the ending is the same with me being alone and hurt and not knowing who to turn to.
Well, that part changed at least.
I, once again, went to my parents, and, once again, I was stabbed in the back because it is their nature to do anything opposite of what I say just so they can argue that theirs is the more valid and just point and that I'm just being silly and emotional. This time I have Luke to turn to when I'm betrayed and hurt. I think I always could turn to him, but I never considerded it an option before because I was still going through my "oh he doesn't like me pish posh" stage.
I still can't believe that she quit.
She's never quit at anything. Ever. And now I'm sitting here watching Luke work up this amazing plan to steal her away from my parent's in order to force her to school, like we're the mafia or something. As much as I want to say "ok" to this plan I know that even a small attempt at it will fail. We could force Rory to go to school, but it doesn't mean we could force her to participate in anything that would actually require her to pass the classes she takes.
And then it hits me. What I want is right in front of me. I don't want to be a consultant; I don't want to travel the world for anything other than a vacation. What I want is pacing me in the face and talking about a young woman like she was his own even though he isn't; what I want is a life and a family with a man whom he can treat as his own without having to worry about the biological owner showing up unexpectantly.
So I asked him to take that leap with me. I know I'm not a reliable ship; it's a miracle that we worked through our problems before and my track record isn't the greatest, especially since Taylor feels the need to point it out in town meetings. And the answer was probably fitting to the question and the placement in the rant and the timing, and Luke did something that was very confusing.
He left me standing in the middle of the diner without an answer. Instead he does a clothinged impression of Kirk running to the town square screaming Taylor's name at the top of his lungs. Not exactly what I was picturing when the day came that one of us popped the question, and I really thought it would have been him first. Now he comes storming back and slamming the door.
Luke is pacing and ranting about houses and jerks and stupid rich Kirk. . . hold on, Kirk is rich! I put a hand on his chest to calm him down which seems to work for a while. Then he's off at the race track again about how I wasn't supposed to be the one to ask. Apparently he had this huge plan in his head that rivaled the 1000 yellow daisies and would incorporate the magic that is snow. But wait a minute. . .
He had a plan. . .
He was going to propose. . .
Which means. . .
Suddenly I find Luke at my feet asking me the same question. It suddenly all clicks. House. Kids. What I want with Luke.
And I find myself answering.
And it doesn't matter that I'm not on speaking terms with my parents and that my daughter and I are now estranged (well sort of anyway). Things in my life are never down the line perfect and little moments of nearness are what I have come to enjoy. This is one of those moments where nearly everything is perfect and I know the rest will sort itself out. When it comes to my parents I will be a broken record of putting trust in them and having it snatched away, and when it comes to Rory I know that something will force our hand.
But when it comes to Luke I refuse to hit the repeat button in the limo because I want to keep going and at least attempt the whole package, and as soon as my feet touch the ground again it will be perfect enough for me.
THE END
So yeah that's my grand conclusion to what turned out to be a bunch of gap fillers with my own little twists inside. Hope you enjoyed it anyway and REVIEW.