Every Day
Disclaimer: All things Power
Ranger-related belong to Saban, who wouldn't dream of paying me even
a wooden nickel. Blast him, anyway! -- This idea came to me out of
nowhere, but was too insistent to stay buried, so here it goes ....
my first story of the New Millennium! Yay! *cough* Ahem. *cough*
It was originally sorta supposed to be ready for Valentine's Day, so be
warned, it's a straight-out romance, a mood piece if you like, with
no pretense at anything else. -- A few scenes border on the suggestive,
but rest assured, nothing happens that couldn't be shown on Prime
Time TV. Let's say it's PG-13, to be safe. Thanks to Krys and Eva
for specific helpful suggestions (which I admittedly sometimes disregarded;
sorry, ladies!), and as usual, Mele and Peregrine for overall encouragement.
I'm one of those pesky authors thriving on feedback, so if you want to
comment, please do so. DB, Winter 2000/01
Every Day
By
Dagmar Buse
She was going to break up with him.
Jason could read it in the blue eyes of the woman sitting
across from him in the small Italian restaurant as clearly as if she were
holding up a sign. It made him sick to his stomach, filling him with a
feeling of panic unlike anything he'd ever known. He couldn't lose her
-- not when 'they' had only barely begun! Not like he'd lost Emily only
a few months ago.
The dark-haired young man swallowed the lump always forming
in his throat as he remembered that day in spring -- when the girl he'd
dated since his senior year of High School had coolly informed him that
she was moving back East within the week. He'd been completely taken off-guard
even though Emily had casually mentioned the possibility before. Jason
simply, and as it turned out, foolishly, had hoped their relationship meant
more to her -- as much as it meant to him. Instead, after he'd overcome
his initial shock, he had had to listen in stunned silence as she told
him she actively didn't want him to follow her, or even stay in
contact. Rather, the spirited blonde had said, she wanted a clean break
from everything -- including her California boyfriend.
After the first paralyzing pain had worn off, Jason had
been glad for one thing -- while he would have willingly gone with Emily,
he'd have hated to give up his friends, his family and the dojo he managed
together with Tommy and Rocky. That was the only positive thing about being
dumped by her -- that, and the support his friends had offered him so unstintingly,
helping him to get through the inevitable questions and self-doubts.
The person who'd helped him the most, though, was with
him right now, looking anywhere but at him as she fiddled with the stem
of her wineglass. Katherine. Another beautiful blue-eyed blonde who had
listened and soothed, talked and shared anguished silences while he was
trying to cope with his loss. Somewhere along the line, they'd started
to share more than just words and confidences, offering comfort with hugs
that lasted longer and longer, hands that found each other while taking
walks, until finally, only a couple of weeks ago, they'd kissed for the
first time.
Jason had believed everything was fine now, finding new
peace through Kat's support and acceptance, and he'd cautiously begun to
hope that this relationship would prove to be deeper, more meaningful than
what he'd had with Emily. He'd certainly not been looking for a new romance,
but kissing Kat had felt so right, so good .... even though it had
been very much a spur-of-the-moment thing, not premeditated at all, he
couldn't find it within him to regret having done it. But since their last
date, which had been something of a disaster because he'd been particularly
depressed and, despite his best intentions had once again pined for his
ex-girlfriend, Kat had been strangely silent and withdrawn.
All evening, her smiles had seemed strained, she'd been
quiet and subdued, and had refused to let herself be drawn out. Jason had
puzzled over it, giving his all to make their dinner date memorable and
pleasant, but to no avail. Kat had only picked at her food, barely nipped
at her wine and would hardly look at him. Only now, when their waiter had
removed their dishes, did she meet the dark eyes of the man opposite her,
and that was when Jason knew.
The next instant, Kat confirmed his worst fears.
"I can't see you anymore, Jason," she whispered, her porcelain
skin pale in the subdued light. "At least not like before."
"Kat ...."
"No, hear me out," she pleaded, touching his hand briefly.
Her softly-accented voice was thick with emotion, and it gave Jason a perverse
sense of satisfaction to see that at least for Kat, this wasn't as easy
as it had apparently been for Emily.
"Jase .... I like you a lot, you're a wonderful, nice
guy, and if we'd come together under different circumstances, I think I
might have liked being .... more than just your friend," Kat proceeded
to explain. "But, as things are .... I just can't."
It hurt to hear her say it, even though he'd steeled himself
against it as best he could.
"Why not?" Jason asked hoarsely. It took every bit of
control and discipline at his command to stay seated, to let Kat finish,
when everything inside of him wanted to howl out his pain like a wounded
dog might howl at the moon. If they'd been anywhere else, he knew he'd
be pacing. Jason fought down the impulse to grab the lovely blonde and
shake some sense into her, to make her take the words back and promise
to stay with him. Emily had left him without a real reason; he'd be damned
if he let Katherine slip from his life just like that. Never mind that
this was only their fourth 'real' date, he didn't want things to
end!
Kat blinked several times as if to banish tears; even
though she was convinced she was doing the right thing, it was not easy
to confront the hurt that had sprung up in the expressive dark eyes, aware
that she had caused it. But then, she'd feared it was going to be
like this -- only, her sense of self-preservation demanded she go through
with it, anyway. She wasn't going to make it any harder on both
of them by crying, she wasn't! Gulping down the lump in her throat, Kat
reached out to lay cool, unsteady fingers on Jason's strong hands, which
he'd unconsciously clenched into fists on the checquered tablecloth. Gently,
she started to smooth them straight again, like she'd done so often in
the past months.
"Jason .... I know you're still hurting over Emily. No,
don't try to deny it," she stopped him before he could do more than open
his mouth. "I don't mind listening to you vent, or helping you cope --
I'm your friend, and that's what friends do. If anything, I'm honored that
you trust me enough to help, to share your feelings with me. But -- and
this is why I have to call things off between us before they go
any further -- you're still on the rebound. And I've been through all of
this once before with Tommy, when Kim broke up with him. I mistook compassion
and the desire to help a friend in pain for love, and let myself believe
that there was something deeper between us than there actually was. I can't
-- I won't do that again, because I'll only end up hurting myself."
"You and Tommy were together for years," Jason objected,
focussing with difficulty on the immediate thing. "You don't stay with
someone, through a long separation, too, if there's nothing real between
the people involved!"
Katherine sighed, letting go of his hands and taking a
sip of her wine to gain a few precious seconds and marshal her thoughts.
"I never said there was 'nothing' between Tommy and me;
there was definitely something. Looking back, I can even say we
loved each other -- only not the way we thought we did. Rita had compelled
me to lure Tommy away from Kim, if I could .... which wasn't a very hard
thing to do for me. After all, he's a very good-looking man, very nice,
charming .... I never questioned my feelings for him until the end. And
I know he was attracted to me, too, when we first met. But he was
with Kim then, and I always realized that he would never have acted on
that attraction on his own. If we had gotten to know each other normally,
run into each other at school or wherever ...." Her voice trailed off momentarily.
Then, after taking a deep breath, she added, "Who knows what might have
happened if Rita hadn't interfered!"
The young woman smiled briefly as she remembered the early
days of her stay in Angel Grove, how she'd met the Rangers, and lastly
become friends with all of them. Of how it had been to fall in love with
a man who wasn't free, then suddenly became available .... for her, it
had been a dream come true, in a lot of ways. It was a pity that reality
-- or maybe just life -- hadn't cooperated with her dreams in the long
run.
"Anyway, Tommy and I were very lucky that our friendship
stayed intact, even though we split up eventually."
That had come as a surprise to everybody, including
Kat and the former Red Turbo Ranger himself. They'd stayed in close contact
all the time Kat was studying ballet in London, until her return to the
US. Their relationship had survived the geographical separation as well
as Tommy's racing career, which had ended in an accident that only by sheerest
luck had left him, after months of rehab, with no more permanent damage
than a few scars; however, it had been the impetus he'd needed to say goodbye
to the adrenaline rush of racing and return to his first love -- Martial
Arts. Jason and Rocky had welcomed their friend with open arms, and the
three erstwhile Red Rangers were working well together, hoping to save
enough money to one day own the large, popular dojo they were jointly
managing.
Kat had gone on to earn a teaching degree, and now split
her time working at both AGH and Angel Grove Conservatory, teaching swimming
at one and ballet at the other. Strangely enough, once they were living
in the same town again, their mundane, quite busy lives kept Tommy and
Kat more and more apart, until one day they realized that when they had
time
for each other they were mostly interacting as just friends -- and being
very happy about it. Confused, they tried for a while to revive their romance,
but the spark just wasn't there anymore, and both decided that they would
prefer having a really good, close friend in the other than lose each other
completely.
But the experience had left scars on Katherine's heart
and soul. For the longest time, she'd believed she had found the man of
her life in Tommy. To have to admit she'd lived an illusion for years had
been very painful; somehow, irrationally, she felt that she had almost
wasted
a part of her life. Of course she hadn't, it never was a waste to care
for someone, but still .... her dream was to get married and have a family
one day; if it couldn't be with Tommy, then with someone else. But, even
though it hadn't worked out, her time with the charismatic young man had
left her a legacy of very high standards to look for in a partner.
If she was honest, Jason met all of her standards -- he
possessed intelligence, humor, integrity, a strong sense of right and wrong,
the courage to stand up for his convictions .... not to mention extraordinary
good looks, dark hair and midnight-colored eyes that were so very expressive
-- but he was also still hurting over losing his longtime girlfriend. Just
like Tommy had when Kim had written him that letter.
*Been there, done that,* Kat thought somewhat bitterly
while steeling herself against the pain she could see crossing the handsome
face before Jason averted his eyes. He was clearly struggling for words.
"Kat .... I'm sorry, I know I shouldn't have gone on so
about Emily last week, but when she sent my letters back .... I was just
so bummed, I -"
"I know, Jason," she interrupted him compassionately.
"You don't have to apologize. I understood what you were doing, and I don't
blame you for venting; as I said, we're friends, and if you can't unburden
yourself to a friend, who then? But, and this is a very big but,
it also showed me how much you still care about her."
"I dated her for nearly five years," he almost-snorted.
The defensiveness audible in his voice irked, but he couldn't suppress
it, either. "I can't just shrug all that time off like an old coat!"
"I'm not asking you to," the blonde assured him. "But
please -- understand that I've lived through this once already, and I don't
think I can do it again. Not if I want to keep myself from getting hurt
-- again. Maybe that makes me a coward; I don't know. But I won't put my
heart on the line if I can't be sure to have my feelings reciprocated."
Kat's voice had died down to a whisper, and it was obvious that it pained
her to say it, but at the same time her usually gentle face was very determined.
She meant what she said.
"I never should have let you kiss me," she added softly.
Jason took his time to reply. When he did, he met her
blue eyes openly, not even trying to hide the desperation he was beginning
to feel. He couldn't honestly say if he was in love with the lovely Australian
or not, but he did know that he didn't want to lose her .... that
her presence in his life was maybe the only ray of light he'd seen since
the day Emily had dumped him.
"But we did kiss, Kat .... and you enjoyed it,
too. I know you too well -- you didn't kiss me back just to humor me, or
because you felt sorry for me," Jason stated with quiet conviction, reading
confirmation in her slight blush. "There is something between us
.... and I don't want to lose that. Please -- won't you give it a try?"
"I don't think I can, Jason," she demurred. "I need ....
more .... than 'something'. I promised myself one thing after Tommy and
I broke up -- I won't enter another relationship unless I know there's
.... well, love, I guess. Affection and attraction just aren't enough for
me anymore."
"You're asking for guarantees that it'll last. I'm sorry,
Kat, but nobody can give you that."
"I know, but I can ask for reasonable certainty."
For a moment, both ex-Rangers were silent. Then, Katherine
summoned a ghost of a smile.
"Jason, please -- I don't want to lose you as my friend,
and the way I see it, there's nothing more you have to give me right now."
"That's not true," he protested, but even to his own ears,
it didn't ring as certain as he wanted it to. Attuned to his moods as she'd
become, Kat sighed. A tiny part inside of her had hoped ...
"Can you honestly look at me and say you love me -- and
mean
it?" she asked finally, meeting his eyes head-on. "Because that's what
I need, Jason. I won't settle for less this time."
The slow blush staining his cheeks and his downcast look
gave her his answer.
"I thought not," she murmured, having waited a while for
a protest that wasn't forthcoming. A heavy sadness settled over the pair,
both feeling very unhappy, neither knowing what to say anymore. "I'm sorry."
Jason didn't reply, just summoned the waiter for their
bill. His thoughts were in turmoil, because he knew Kat was absolutely
right about his state of mind; he could even see and understand her position,
but that didn't prevent panic from starting to creep into his heart. For
deep within, a voice was crying out at him to do SOMETHING, anything
, to not let her get away like this, to fight for what he was so
afraid to lose .... the only question was, how?
~*~
Silently, the two made their way to Kat's small apartment.
The weather was nice and summery-warm, even this late in the evening, so
they'd walked from her house to the restaurant. Both were deep in thought
-- Kat about what might have been, and Jason about how he could possibly
change her mind, if at all. When they reached the apartment complex's parking
lot, where Jason had left his car, she turned towards him with a tiny,
brave smile.
"I'll be safe from here; you needn't walk me to the door,"
she said softly, hating the despondent look on Jason's face and knowing
she'd put it there. But she didn't have any other choice, did she?
Jason glanced briefly at her, then his eyes went up to
the night sky, where a few stars were twinkling in the darkness. His Adam's
apple was bobbing as he swallowed convulsively, but he didn't speak. Kat
once more felt tears gathering in her eyes; she fought them down determinedly.
Crying wouldn't help. Neither would prolonging the inevitable. Gently,
she touched his arm.
"Goodbye, Jason," she murmured, meaning more than just
a temporary farewell. She was also saying goodbye to their relationship.
That
finally let her companion find his voice again.
"No!" Jason exclaimed vehemently, taking her by her shoulders
and shaking her just a little. "Kat, I can't! I won't let you go
just like this!"
She shook her head sadly, somehow not surprised at his
reaction.
"That's not your decision alone to make, Jason," she refused.
"I don't want to hurt you, but-"
"Then don't!" Before Kat could say anything else, he let
her go abruptly and turned away, visibly gathering his composure. When
he had, he swivelled back to face her and drew her lightly against him.
"Kat .... you know me. I'm a fighter, I don't give up
easily -- not when it's something I believe in. And if I know nothing else,
I believe there's more to us than just me wanting someone to make
me forget Emily." He forestalled her comment. "Yes, there's that, too --
I'm not denying it, but I'm too confused right now to figure it all out.
I only know I don't want to lose you."
"I'll still be your friend, Jason," Kat assured him, moved
despite herself by his intensity. "Always. Just like the others, you'll
always
be
my friend."
"That's not enough, Kat," he said quietly, handing her
own words back to her. "Not anymore."
"Jason ...." she sighed exasperatedly. "I told you
why I don't think this'll work ..."
"Yes and I respect your point of view, but
-"
"Then why won't you let me end this now, today, before
we end up hurting each other?" she interrupted him.
"Because I can't. Won't. Kat ... you've taken me totally
by surprise; can't you at least give me some time to think about this?"
"I'm not going to change my mind on this, Jason," the
Australian warned him, silencing that small distant voice in her mind that
whispered, Why not? What would it hurt? *My heart,* she answered
herself, hardening herself against the longing and hope in the dark eyes.
"Please, Kat -- all I'm asking for is a chance," he pleaded,
thinking frantically. Seemingly out of nowhere, a vague idea began to form.
"You told me you have this weekend off; I can probably rearrange my schedule
to match. It's only two days -- why can't you give me these two days to
let me try and show you what's between us? Why I think 'us' can work?"
"It'll only drag out the end unnecessarily, Jason," she
objected. "I can't think of a single thing you might say or do this weekend
that you couldn't say right now -- and my answer would still be the same!"
Jason released her and took a few steps away, clearly
searching for control. He swept a hand through his short dark hair, a gesture
that showed Kat clearly how upset he was. Tommy had used to rub the back
of his neck every time he'd been nervous, or agitated; Jason usually didn't
show his state of mind like that unless he was seriously rattled. *Well,*
she had to admit to herself, *he has a reason.*
A few crickets were singing in the bushes enclosing the
parking lot, and the faint rush of cars passing by could be heard; otherwise,
the night air was silent around them. Only the beat of their hearts seemed
loud enough to be heard, but of course it wasn't. After several long, tense
moments, during which neither moved or said anything, Jason looked at Kat
again.
"Two days, Kat. This weekend. That's all I'm asking of
you. If I can't convince you to change your mind by Sunday night, I'll
accept just being friends with you." *For now,* he silently vowed
to himself, not looking deeper into the reasons just WHY it was so important
to him all of a sudden. Only hours ago he'd been content to drift into
a pleasant relationship with the pretty blonde standing merely a few feet
away, when that had been about the furthest thing from his mind after Emily
had left him.
"You've never given up on the really important things
without a fight, either. And I believe that this is important. Please,
Kat. Give me -- give us this chance. Don't just throw everything
away. If you still think that we won't work out come Sunday, I won't object
to whatever limits you place on our relationship. I promise."
Jason meant every word, Kat could see that as clearly
as if it had been written in neon letters against the night sky. And even
though she'd promised herself when she'd decided to call it off between
them that she wouldn't be swayed, that for once she'd place her own needs
before those of a friend, something in Jason's eyes, in his voice, spoke
to her more loudly than his intense little speech. She could feel herself
starting to reconsider.
Jason read the hesitancy in her crystal eyes. Scarcely
daring to hope, he embraced her lightly and gently touched her cheek, letting
his fingertips trail from her temple down to her chin, the gesture almost,
but not quite, a caress.
"Please, Kat. Two days, a chance .... nothing more. I
promise," he repeated, his low voice a soft rumble in the darkness.
Kat closed her eyes briefly and drew in a deep, shuddering
breath. She was wavering, much to her chagrin. When she looked back
into the so-dark orbs, she couldn't help a slight headshake. When was
she going to be immune against the puppy-dog expression all of her former
male teammates seemed to have perfected without knowing it? Even Billy
had used it on occasion, and none of the girls had ever been able to resist.
*Probably
the day I die,* she thought with a wry inner chuckle.
"This is against my better judgment, Jason," she sighed
resignedly at last, but the expression of gratitude and relief lighting
up his face was worth giving in to his persuasion. Almost. She braced herself
against the exuberant hug she was sure was going to follow, but it never
came. To Kat's surprise, all Jason permitted himself was a warm, thankful
smile, a brief tightening of the grasp he still had on her waist and a
new touch of his hand to her cheek.
"Thank you, Kat. You won't regret this," he murmured.
"I hope not," she said quietly, then disentangled herself.
"Very well. I'll see you on Saturday, then."
"Yeah," Jason answered. For a second, it looked as if
he was going to kiss her goodnight after all, but then he just took a small
step backwards. Kat fought down the rush of disappointment and the sudden
impulse to kiss him -- but no, now even a chaste peck on the cheek
would be too much. Instead, she settled for a neutral smile.
"Goodnight, Jase," she whispered, the nickname flowing
easily from her lips.
"Goodnight, Kat," he replied just as softly, then watched
her go, not climbing into his car until the door to her building had safely
closed behind her.
~*~
Kat prepared for bed, her mind in turmoil. Had she done
the right thing, acceding to Jason's request to give him a chance? Part
of her said yes, it was only fair, but another, very vocal portion of her
brain told her she was being a fool -- just opening herself up for further
heartache and disillusionment. Still, she'd given him her word, sort of,
and just as she knew Jason would keep his promise to her, so would she
keep hers to him. Slipping under the covers, she turned off the light,
wondering what kind of elaborate method of persuasion Jason would likely
come up with to change her mind. Not that extravangance or the spending
of lots of money was going to influence her decision, but if she was honest
.... she would enjoy two days of pampering and having every wish fulfilled
as soon as she could voice it.
With a wistful smile that was also the tiniest bit smug,
Katherine drifted off to sleep.
Across town, Jason was thinking a lot of the same thoughts
as he climbed the steps to the garage apartment his parents had fixed for
him for his 21st birthday. His own realm, with a lot of the
comforts of almost/still living at home (although he tried not to abuse
his mother's well-meant generosity), but with the opportunity to be as
self-sufficient as possible. He let himself inside the sparsely but comfortably
furnished room. Picking up a can of beer from the fridge, he then settled
on the couch, staring into the darkness as he racked his brain for a way
to show Kat that they could be good together as a couple.
He slowly sipped his drink as he thought about the evening's
conversation. Jason had never stopped to examine his feelings for his former
teammate too closely; sure, he'd always liked and admired Kat, and he truly
and honestly appreciated all the support and help she'd given him after
Emily left. Talking to his best friend was cathartic, too, but having a
woman listen to his woes was subtly different -- and somehow had better
suited his needs. While Tommy would and could understand his sense of inadequacy,
of having failed as a man somehow, having gone through much the same thing
with Kimberly, Jason had greatly valued the wordless hugs, small touches
and understanding smiles Kat had gifted him with; her very femininity gave
that much more credence to her conviction that it was not all his
fault, that he had done what he could to sustain his relationship
with his ex-girlfriend.
Jason put his feet up on the sturdy coffee table and slouched
into the pillows as he pondered what he did feel for Kat. Just because
she'd been a good friend was no basis to build something deeper on, she
was right about that, at least. It had never been his intention to kiss
her, but a walk in the park had lasted well into the sunset; the air had
been rather nippy for once after two days of rain, and it had seemed the
most natural thing in the world to drape an arm around his friend's
shoulders as he escorted Kat home. Nor had she objected; instead, she'd
snuggled into his side, slipping an arm around his waist as they walked
the streets of their home town. In the beginning, Emily had liked to walk
with him like this, but Kat was taller, not so petite .... the difference
was startling and pleasing at the same time.
He'd brought her to her apartment door; the soft light
from a lamp she'd left burning had cast a muted glow over her lovely features
as she'd turned to him in the quiet hallway to bid him goodnight. The impulse
came out of nowhere; Jason truly hadn't planned to kiss Kat,
but her eyes had looked at him so warmly, her lips had smiled so invitingly
.... it had been the most natural thing in the world to bend down the few
inches separating his mouth from hers and touch her in a gentle caress.
She hadn't withdrawn, or recoiled or anything; after the
first surprise had worn off, Kat had become pliant in his arms, and they
had kissed for a long time, learning of each other until they'd both been
slightly out of breath. And for the first time in weeks, Jason had forgotten
all about Emily.
That was why it was so important for Jason not
to lose Kat. He felt .... whole .... when he held her. Only, how could
he convince her of that without seeming just to take? He needed
to show her that he could give to her as well and that
most definitely went beyond flowers or costly presents.
His beer was long finished and the night far gone, and
still Jason thought, made and discarded plans until his eyes drifted nearly
shut with fatigue and he stumbled off to bed for a few hours of rest, his
dreams filled with visions of a beautiful blue-eyed blonde .... whose golden
locks gradually took on a more silvery hue, her person changing from a
spirited imp into a gentle-eyed ballerina.
In his sleep, Jason smiled.
~*~
"I need the weekend off," Jason announced without preamble
the next day when he met with Tommy and Rocky half an hour after classes
were over at their dojo. It had become their habit to gather each day to
discuss schedules, special events, student performances and anything that
had come up, outside of the pure business/managerial meetings they held
once each month.
"Oh? Anything special come up?" Tommy asked idly as he
lounged at his desk. Jason grinned a bit sheepishly and shrugged.
"You could say that. Can I? Please guys, this is really
important;
I wouldn't put you on the spot like this on short notice if it weren't."
He gazed pleadingly at his friends and colleagues.
"It's not gonna be easy, Jase," Rocky warned, looking
up from his notes. He angled for a calendar, thinking out loud as he looked
over their schedule. "I suppose we can split your Saturday morning classes
between us, and if we can get someone else to take the peewees in the afternoon
.... "
Jason already had thought of a possible solution.
"What about David?"
Two pairs of brown eyes swept towards Tommy for approval.
He shrugged.
"I can ask him; usually he has no special plans on Saturdays.
And he likes working with the kids on occasion. It should work."
"Thanks, guys. Um .... what about Sunday, though?" the
first Red Ranger asked diffidently. "I know Rocky can't do mornings ....
what about you, Tom?"
"Just this once," the long-haired young man agreed with
a grin. "But you're gonna owe me, Bro!" Jason just nodded, then looked
imploringly at Rocky. "My ladies' afternoon class?"
The erstwhile successor to the Red Thunder Powers shook
his head.
"Sorry, Jase. Any other week, but not this Sunday.
It's the anniversary of my dad's dying day, and Mama always goes a little
crazy then. It's not so bad when all of us are home with her, so ...."
It was a valid reason, and Jason neither could nor would
try to persuade Rocky to alter his plans just to accommodate him. All of
them had gotten to know and like Sophia DeSantos in the years since she'd
moved to Angel Grove; the feisty Mexican-American woman had taken all of
the Rangers under her wings indiscriminately, mothering them mercilessly
along with her own brood of children. It didn't matter if they had parents
or not, Mama Sophia, as she insisted everybody call her, scolded and encouraged
and pressured and hugged every one of Rocky's friends, male or female alike,
and there had been times when every single one of them had sought her advice
rather than their own mothers' .... and had been given it from a large,
warm heart. To deprive her of any kind of comfort was unthinkable.
Still, Jason couldn't quite hide his disappointed slump.
"Never mind, then. I'll manage somehow. Damn, I'd hoped to get both days
off," he muttered, knowing that his friends wouldn't mind if he vented
his frustration a bit.
"Any special reason?" Tommy asked again, wandering over
with a fresh pot of coffee and filling everybody's mug.
"Actually, yes," Jason said, absently adding a dash of
cream to his cup. He perched on the windowsill, facing the office and his
friends, but not really seeing either of them, he was so far away mentally.
"I need to convince Kat to continue dating me."
Rocky did a classic double-take while Tommy nearly let
go of the carafe he still held. It clattered noisily onto the small sideboard
where they kept the coffee tray and supplies, but neither young man took
notice. Instead, they focussed intently on Jason.
"What?!?" Rocky sputtered at last, once he'd gotten over
his shock. A quick glance had shown him that that was news to Tommy
as well.
"I didn't even know you and Kat were dating," Tommy
said carefully. He knew how hard his best friend had taken Emily's departure,
and that Katherine had spent a lot of time helping Jason overcome his depression,
but .... dating? As in, fallen-in-love-and-kiss? He didn't quite know how
to react.
Jason glanced sheepishly at Tommy. "It's, um, a fairly
recent thing," he confessed.
"How recent?" Rocky wanted to know, eyes alight with curiosity.
"Very. As in, two weeks," Jason mumbled, blushing slightly.
"And she wants to dump you already?!? Boy, you must've
screwed up big time," Rocky said with his customary lack of tact. "What
did you do, call her 'Emily' when you kissed her?"
"Of course not!" The very thought was abhorrent. Not even
in his darkest moments had Jason ever mistaken the identity of his
golden-haired friend.
"Rocky!" Tommy chided, but couldn't help a faint blush
himself. That very thing had happened to him once or twice in the early
days of his relationship with Kimberly's successor, and he knew he'd hurt
Kat deeply with his absent-mindedness. He still thanked his lucky stars
that she'd been able to forgive him. If Jason had done it to her again
.... but no, the near-black eyes showed only righteous indignation at Rocky's
not-quite-serious accusation. Besides, Jason had too much control for that.
"What did you do, then?" he asked, failing to come
up with any explanation that was even remotely likely. Neither Kat nor
Jason were the type to have short-term relationships; if anything at all
had happened between them, it must've been pretty serious for both.
"Would you believe nothing?" Jason said with a wry grin.
Tommy regarded his best friend seriously for a moment, ignoring Rocky's
doubtful snort.
"Knowing you as well as I do, yes," he answered finally.
"And knowing Kat, no."
"Oh, that's clear," Rocky scoffed, but Jason only
shrugged helplessly, acknowledging Tommy's right to make that statement.
"No, really. I didn't do anything -- at least,
not to anger her or hurt her or something of the sort."
"Then why the hell would Kat want to break up with you
-- especially if it's only been such a short time since you guys have gotten
close? That's not like her," Tommy wanted to know. Now that he was over
his initial surprise, he found it not at all hard to wrap his mind around
the concept of Jason and Kat as a couple. As a matter of fact, he was already
beginning to like the idea. Both meant a lot to him, and he wished them
happiness -- if they were right for each other. And knowing them
as well as he did, Tommy thought they could be .... he resolved then and
there to do everything in his power to help them. He sat forward, listening
intently to what his best friend had to say.
Jason hesitated for a moment -- should he be talking
about his problems? A part of him balked at the loss of privacy telling
them about his problems would entail. But then, Rocky and Tommy were his
friends; they'd listened to him before, and if he couldn't unload to them,
where was he supposed to go? A single look was enough to show him
that they wouldn't condemn him. With a deep sigh that seemed to come from
the soles of his feet, he told them about last night's dinner and Kat's
reasoning for calling things off.
"I managed to persuade Kat to give me one last chance
to convince her I'm serious about her," Jason concluded. "I have two days
-- this weekend. After that .... I gave her my word I wouldn't try to hold
her if she really wants to end it between us."
Rcky whistled through his teeth; Jason had a monumental
task before him.
"You sure got a problem, man," he commiserated with vast
understatement.
"I know," Jason sighed, staring into his empty coffee
mug. The three young men were silent for a few minutes, each lost in his
own thoughts. Then, Tommy fixed his best friend with serious eyes.
"Jase?"
"Yeah?"