Author: Desidera
Title: Live Like You Were Dying
Rating: PG13
Pairing: Seto/Yami, side pairing of OCs
Spoilers: None
Warnings: set about 30 years after the original series, partially AU (blame the song for the ages), one OC character (but no self-insertion and I hope she doesn't get annoying)
Status: (1/1)
Disclaimer:
The song's not mine. (haha, good one…me, actually going through with writing a song….) It is "Live Like You Were Dying" by Tim McGraw.
In honour of this fic I want to say I own the grey streaks in Seto Kaiba's hair feels proud. But no, the rest is still not mine…
Author's Notes:
I didn't do much research on the illness, I hope I chose a "good one" for the story, I hope I got the effects right. If not, forgive me. I hope I gave the right amount of information to tell the necessary details about 30 years of their lives. If not, forgive me. I hope the whole thing is entertaining, has a nice atmosphere and is not completely crazy. If not, forgive me.
Dedication:
To my dear mic-chan! Thanks for being my friend, for agreeing to be my second wife, for writing that crazy plot bunny one-shot with me, for talking to me, for reviewing all of my stories (damn, you're loyal! You really did!),…
I want you to have a really great birthday! kiss
Thanks to Dragon for the song lyrics and the encouragement! kiss too
Live Like You Were Dying
The wheels screeched on the wet asphalt as the car slowly came to a stop. The park was silent, heavy raindrops splashing onto the leaves of tall oak trees, dropping down onto the muddy ground. There was no one outside in this kind of weather, yet the black limousine had stopped in front of the park, and from the back of the car someone was staring out, past the trees and benches and light green lawn, staring out in concentration. Then a slender hand grabbed the door handle and the door opened to reveal a tall man wearing a purple trench coat. He looked lean and agile and only grey strands in between his chocolate brown hair told a story of his age.
With long strides he followed one of the gravel paths leading into the park.
She hadn't noticed that there was someone else in the park, not in this kind of weather, not when the raindrops were mingling with her freely running tears, that she had stopped caring about an hour ago. In her hand there was a small object, silvery grey just like the raindrops, just like the sky, but not as soft. In fact it was sharper than a knife, sharper than a sword, sharper than a piece of broken glass. As if she was in trance she passed it over the underside of her arm as she had seen people do many times on TV, in horrifying pictures meant to scare the readers of newspaper articles or books. Blood splashed out of the fresh wound, messing up her shirt. She hadn't expected it to be this messy, somehow she had thought the blood would run out slowly, leaving her body more reluctantly. Then she wondered if this would be her last thought and if there wasn't some other thing she should think of before she was truly gone.
But at that moment she heard a sound in front of her and as she glanced up through hazy orbs, her sight blurring slightly, she saw a tall frame and piercing blue eyes that held a touch of anger. How strange, she thought and smiled to herself. Then mist gathered in her eyes.
When she came to she found herself in a bed with white sheets that had colourful little bunnies stitched on them. Carefully she ran her hand over a green one, but winced at the pain racing through her flesh. She looked down and noticed that her whole arm was covered in white bandages. Looking around the room, she took in light green curtains, a blue cupboard, lots of old plush animals lying around and the sun shining in through the window.
Then her mind pieced together the memories of raindrops and tears in the park beneath an old tree, the razor blade in her hand, the blood and blue eyes looking down at her.
What had happened to her? It looked like she was alive...But where was she?
Silence stretched over more than ten minutes of wondering, until the wooden door to the room suddenly opened and a tall man came in. Immediately she recognised his eyes, they were the deepest shade of blue. She noticed his clothing, the grey strands of hair, the soft lines age was drawing into his face, but a certain old-fashioned elegance, a touch of arrogance. Somewhere she had seen his face before, but she couldn't remember where.
"Sleep well?", he asked, putting a glass of orange juice next to her onto the nightstand.
"No", she said simply. "Where did you take me? What happened out there?"
The blue-eyed man sighed and pulled up small yellow chair, sitting down next to the bed. "You are in my nephew's old room, he is at college and won't have any objections to you lying here. It is my house by the way, and that of my brother and our two families. We share it, because it is so big."
"Ah, so you're some kind of wealthy old fogey. Perhaps that's why I know your face" She was not in a friendly mood right now and if the had thought he could be patronising with her he had got the wrong runaway girl.
His lips curled up into a smirk. Now where indeed had she seen that smirk before?
"As for your second question", he continued as if she had never said a word, "I think you know perfectly well what happened out there. I left the evidence at the park so I can't show it to you now. I suspect though your arm is still hurting. Assuming you didn't fall on your head in the process of trying to commit suicide I'd say you remember what happened"
She snorted softly. That old git had no shame at all. "Who are you anyway?", she demanded rudely.
That annoying smirk was still there. "Not an angel trying to save you, that much I can assure you of. I'm just someone who doesn't like watching people act upon foolish ideas their minds conjure up."
Now he had really gotten her angry. "Who do you think you are, Mr Know-it-all? You have no idea who I am, what I've gone through. You don't know my reasons. I won't stay a second longer in your house." With that she threw back the blanket, trying to stand to make a dramatic disappearance, but as soon as her feet touched the floor, her legs gave out beneath her and she stumbled, landing right in her host's arms.
"Gah! Disgusting!", she cried, wriggling back onto the bed.
He just shook his head as if he was dealing with a child. It infuriated her. She was seventeen, far from a child actually, and she wanted to be treated that way. But apparently the blood loss had made her weak. For the moment furious glares and biting comments would have to be enough.
"You seem to be overly sensitive", the tall man stated, crossing his legs.
"And you seem to be overly smug", she retorted, crossing her arms.
"Speak for yourself", he answered, "And now I'd ask you to tell me your name. You're obviously underage and your parents need to be informed you are safe here"
Again, she snorted.
"You tell me your name first then I'll think about it. And be assured they won't miss me. No one will"
The way he looked at her made her feel uncomfortable, it was like he was trying to read her mind. "What?", she hissed.
"Is that why you tried to take the easy way out? Because you thought no one would miss you?"
"No, you old fool", she snarled furiously. "You're never gonna know. You wouldn't understand anyway."
"Seto Kaiba"
"What?", she looked up at him. "That's your name?"
"That's my name"
"Oh. The CEO of that gaming company, right? I never cared much for games but my father and mother are passionate about them. They are far outdated nowadays."
"I know", the tall man sighed. "Trust me, I do. Fortunately my company managed to specialise on other products over the years. Now what is your name?"
"Mona. But I won't tell you my last name."
"Mona" He leaned back and pondered the name. Then he nodded. "Well, Mona, rest a little longer, I'm going to get you supper"
At first Mona had been too overwhelmed to notice her failure, but when she watched the sky go darker through the window, the full realisation of what had happened sank in. She had tried to kill herself, but it had all gone downhill, thanks to this smug old git.
The memories of the last days that should have been the last days of her life came back to her. For a second time the scenes played over and over in her head. First she saw the evening when she had told her dad and mom she wanted to quit school to live with Gregory, and they had been so furious. Next came the night after, when she had climbed out of the window and had run away to meet with Greg. And finally two nights later, on the street, where Gregory had suddenly insisted she was his property to do with whatever he wanted to do and had….that filthy, little….binding her hands with his belt….pulling her trousers down….it had been so disgusting, so….Fresh tears rose to her eyes, even as she tried to blink them away.
So this was her life. She had quit school, her parents would never forgive her for running away, the way she had betrayed them. Gregory, the man she had loved most in the world, had lied to her, abused her body and broken her heart.
What did she have left to live for? Nothing. Best go back to the park where she knew the razor blade would still be lying.
Grabbing her shoes from somewhere next to the bed, she stood, discovering she could now stand and walk again. Wiping away the tears, she tiptoed out of the room, trying to gain some sense of direction in the immense corridors. This house had to be more like a castle! Eventually, after going down some flights of stairs, she found herself in a long hall, leading towards a huge door. That had to be the exit. Silently she crept over the carpeted floor.
"I wouldn't do that"
At the sound of that voice her head snapped up. And there he was again, in a blue bathing robe, glaring at her almost angrily.
"I will do whatever I wanna do and you won't stop me" she growled and ran towards the door, grabbing the handle. It was locked of course. "Damnit!", she screamed, banging her fist onto the wood of the door.
"Mona", he said, calmly. "I don't know why you want to kill yourself. But I know whatever it is, it cannot be worth it. Nothing is worth giving up something so great as the chance to live."
"You have no idea!", she went on screaming, "Fuck you, let me go!" Again she rammed her fist into the door, until his hand grabbed it hard to stop her. She ripped her arm away from him but stayed still, watching him through a veil of tears. Blue eyes bored into hers. It was a relief that they didn't hold concern or fake pity, but seriousness and that slight bit of anger.
"I'm going to tell you why, Mona. Come to the kitchen, sit down, have a drink and a midnight snack and I'll tell you why life is a gift that you shouldn't throw away so easily."
Something in those eyes convinced her that it was a good thing to go with him to the kitchen. He offered her a cup of hot, steaming tea and some cookies, which she eyed warily. A soft laugh erupted from the pit of his stomach as he noticed her suspicious glance.
"I didn't put anything into it. No drugs, no poison, no medications to make you fall asleep again. It wouldn't make any sense, would it? Medications can't cure suicidal thoughts, at least not in this case."
She nodded. "Now what did you want to tell me?"
He sat down across from her, sipping his tea and looking out of the window for a while, where outside there was only darkness. And then he started to speak.
He said I was in my early 40's,
With a lot of life before me,
And a moment came that stopped me on a dime.
Flashback
"Well, Mr Kaiba…This is going to come as a bit of a shock to you…but be assured we will start the treatment immediately and try everything that is…."
"What is it?"
"Well…"
"Tell me! What exactly is wrong with me?"
His face is impassive except for the glare in his eyes, directed at the doctor. But in his lap his fists are clenched tightly. It couldn't be anything serious, right?
"You have cancer, Mr Kaiba. Non-Small Cell Lung Cancer, since you want me to be precise. We are not sure about the stage yet, but the tumor might already have spread further. I fear you will have to undergo more tests so we can make sure. In any case we have to start the treatment soon. Surgery, chemotherapy, radiation therapy – there are many ways and as soon as we have more results we will try to find the best treatment for you but for now…."
There is a soft hand wrapping around his fists, delicate fingers spreading his own and intertwining his hand with the other one. He can't help but grab it tightly, while his face still doesn't show any emotion. His voice is calm as he demands, "When will you know for sure?"
The doctor hesitates. "We cannot say yet, Mr Kaiba. You want me to be honest – your tumor is not small anymore. Give us time. We will be as fast as possible"
His grip on the other hand must be painful for the person sitting next to him. Gathering all his willpower he tries to let go, but the other simply holds it more firmly, not allowing his withdrawal. When the doctor looks down at his notes, babbling on about the tests he will have to undergo, he holds on to that hand, slightly numb. Cancer…but there is treatments offered. They will help him, won't they? Could he trust them?
"I suggest you recover a bit, Mr Kaiba, and come back tomorrow to talk to me again about the treatments"
The doctor must have noticed he isn't paying attention.
End of Flashback
I spent most of the next days, lookin' at the x-rays,
Talkin' 'bout the options and talkin' 'bout sweet time.
"The next days were pretty much the same. I didn't do much, spent a lot of time at the hospital. At least ten different doctors were called to tell me about various treatments, the normal ones, but also new treatments and research groups they offered to put me into.
They took it very seriously, they knew my name, and although my gaming company had just passed to my little brother and I was resigning with 40 years only, I was a man of importance with a lot of money to spend. There were other plans I had outside of my company that was now specializing on virtual technology improvements anyway and abandoning my favourite game.
My thoughts returned to my past very often, retelling my life every night in my dreams. Unintentionally my subconscious was ahead of my brain which still struggled to accept that I was ill. The full realisation hadn't yet struck."
"And when did you realise?", she asked.
Asked him when it sank in, that this might really be the real end.
How's it hit ya, when you get that kind of news.
Man what ya do.
Flashback
A soft gasp echoes in the dark bedroom. In the light of a weak crescent moon, wide blue eyes are consumed by an eerily pale glow. Forcefully ripped from the depths of his sleep his brain suddenly starts to work, and terror grips him mercilessly, like an electric shock, surging through his body. And then it is gone and he is left with the tingling of the aftermath, which is twice as bad, twice as hard to bear.
And what if the treatments won't work?
It is a good thing he is not alone that night, a good thing there is someone to hold him, as he buries his head in his hands, shaken. He never needed comfort, never wanted it. He doesn't want it now. Nonetheless he accepts it because the night throws its concealing blackness over everything that happens, because to this one person he doesn't have to prove his strength, because it just feels good to be held. The one holding him could always seduce him to accept his offers, persuade him to enjoy the pleasures of life.
Why now? Now after all those years he would have parted easily with this world. Why now that life is so perfect?
End of Flashback
"I guess you were really whacked then"
"It wasn't easy, no. I had lived for almost twenty five years of my life with only the love of my brother. I loved no one else. Then, after being away for a long time and coming back here, I met him again. Unbelievable we loved each other already! It took us five more years to become an actual official couple. And back then when I could finally see the extent of my illness, I realised for the first time that I had had only ten years with him, wasted so many years before. I didn't want it to end. I had just resigned after all, thinking about allowing us both to have a quiet life. Mokuba would lead the company perfectly, even more so since our stocks were skyrocketing again after the whole change into a virtual reality company.
How could I have left my husband behind now that we were finally happy together? How could I have left this world without him? I also needed to assist my little brother concerning company issues, and I wanted to see his children grow.
The chemotherapy was no fun either. I didn't show it, but I admit it was gnawing at me, making me feel more miserable every time. Depression came along with it, and I had still six chemotherapies to undergo and on top of it all a surgery. No one saw it, except for my brother and my husband, but I was distressed and desperate. It sounds pathetic, I know, but back then I couldn't help it. I had survived my adoptive father only to be brought down by this blasted illness."
"I see. So, how did it go on? What did you do?"
He smiled. "Actually, I didn't do anything, it was my husband who finally acted, seeing my misery and not being able to stand it.
Flashback
The wind is tousling his hair as he looks down from his old duelling tower onto the city below and muses if a dead spirit could fly over the lands, free like a gust of air. Lean arms are snaking around his waist, a well-known body pressing into him from behind.
"You like the wind, don't you? You like the thought of flying away, of plunging down from the sky and rising again with a flap of strong wings. Like your dragons."
"How come you always know what I'm thinking?"
The other laughs softly.
"I don't know, Seto. I am bound to you and the bond between us quivers with every move you make and every sigh you heave. Now, did you ever think about trying it?"
"Trying what?"
"Flying of course" Soft kisses are pressed to his neck and shoulders. "Sky diving."
He frowns. "Of course not."
"Why?"
"Because it is just an illusion. We will never be able to fly, sky diving is just pretending."
"But it is as close as we will ever come to it. Don't you want to find out?"
"No"
A soft, teasing bite on his shoulder and a low, melodious voice next to his ear make his eyes widen.
"Oh, and what if I challenged you? What if I dared you to go sky diving with me, Seto Kaiba?"
And he says,
I went sky divin',
I went rocky mountain climbin',
"I am a very competitive man, and my husband knew it, knew just the way to persuade me. And so we went sky diving, up on one of my planes after a long row of tests so we could be sure we knew how to do it. The only time I had ever experienced anything like it had been in virtual worlds that captured nature perfectly, precisely. But nothing came close the real thing.
He smirked at me and kissed me for a long minute and then he asked me if I was ready. The hell I was, always ready for a challenge and so, together, we did it, plunged down into the sky, falling, falling.
And then when the parachute opened and I was really, truly flying, I felt my life returning to me, and was in it with all my soul, all my heart.
Both of us landed safely and kissed again, and my kisses told my husband he had succeeded."
"And that was all it took?", she asked, sceptical.
"Oh no!", he laughed, "It was only the beginning. I remember climbing a mountain with an unpronounceable name, dripping with sweat because the sun was burning so hot. Promise you won't tell my husband – I thought I would never get up there. But I didn't want to lose to him and my willpower proved stronger in the end. We watched the sun go down on top of that mountain, and it was the greatest sundown I have ever seen.
And then his third challenge…"
He smirked to himself, then shook his head. "That sly little…"
Flashback
"Absolutely not. We don't do things like that in Japan."
"Come on, you owned an international company, it's not like you feel strange about going to another country. It's only a few comfortable hours in your plane. We even have a bedroom in there…."
"I won't fly to Australia for something like this"
"Oh, I think they do it in Canada too…"
"No, end of discussion"
….
"And what if I dared you to?"
End of Flashback
"And what did he want you to do?"
He was carefully sipping his freshly poured tea, smirking but getting that far away look again. It made her feel strange seeing those blue eyes sparkle like this, as if there was something more behind his words that she couldn't grasp with her brain but only with her heart.
I went 2.7 seconds on a bull name Fu Manchu.
"We went to Canada, to a rodeo. If you want the details, he was huge, massive and black. Heavy, pounding hooves, horns adorned with a headdress containing a blood red sign that – as I was told afterwards – read he was going to crush everyone. The moment I saw him I was sure I wouldn't do this, no matter how many times my husband would call me a coward, no matter it could have been the only chance in my life to ever do this. But my husband is a special guy and he is not afraid of death, might it be the reaper with his scythe or a black bull named Fu Manchu.
How he got on top of that beast I will never find out. How I got on top of it – impossible to describe. He lasted 2.5 second, I lasted 2.7, and that's all that matters. We both couldn't move for weeks because of the bruises, not to mention the fact that he almost got trampled by that black devil.
But the way I felt afterwards was indescribable as well. I had not only done something seemingly impossible and beaten my husband at it, no. I had, for the first time in my life, done something completely irresponsible, silly and crazy."
She had to laugh, imagining him on the back of a black bull. Why did she feel like the words were sinking deep into her heart, trying to stir a hidden emotion there?
And I loved deeper,
And I spoke sweeter,
And I gave forgiveness I've been denying,
"Would you like more tea?", he offered, and when she nodded he stood up and continued his tale from the stove where he heated new water.
"I suddenly realised I didn't spend enough time with the persons I loved most. I love my brother and his family but over the last year we had mostly talked about the company. So I told him to give everyone a three day break, something that I had never done before, driving our stock purchasers mad, and went away with him, only the two of us for a few days, taking him to places we were talking about as children. It was amazing how I got to know new things about my little brother even then. After all we had never been separated since the day he had been born. Or maybe we just got back to ourselves, to things we had forgotten about each other.
When we returned to our lives and families we knew we had to keep this up.
And then I also spent time with my husband. I had never felt the need to tell him I loved him, actually I had done so only once before, namely when I proposed to him. But back then I suddenly wanted to tell him. It was on my lips every time the sun's or the moon's light fell onto his face, every time he threw back his head to laugh, every time he came padding into the kitchen in the morning, yawning and rubbing his eyes.
I enjoyed teasing him again. When he would get on his tiptoes to kiss me, I'd smirk at him and stand very straight so no matter how much he tried he could only reach my chin and kiss it, complaining about the stubble.
There was someone else I had to make up with, though. I had carried this burden around with me for more than thirty years."
Flashback
The sunlight is warm on his face as he walks through the city. Children are laughing and eating ice cream, cars are passing him on the street, but he doesn't pay any notice to either of them, he just walks on, the bunch of flowers clasped firmly in his hand.
There is a wall of withered stone surrounding the cemetery. Ivy creeps over it, slowly, reaching outside as if it intends to spread this place's calming quietness over the rest of the city. Many graves are covered in ivy as well, among them the one he is looking for.
It is a marble stone beneath an old linden. One can barely read the names beneath the ranking climbing plant. But he doesn't have to read them. It doesn't matter that he was only a little boy when he was at this place for the last time.
He remembers it clearly, it was the day after his father's funeral. There he was, bitter and lonely, running his hands over the white marble, asking them over and over again why they had left him and his little brother alone, why they weren't there anymore for them. He had blamed them, had made accusations, shouted at the grave because it had looked so cold and indifferent.
There is softness in his face when he looks down at the grave now. Some of those accusations stayed in his heart for a long time. But now he is here to let go of them. His parents are not to blame. He kneels down, strokes the marble – fondly, this time.
He stays until evening falls and there are candles lit everywhere on the cemetery. And in the moonlight he lights his own and places it on the grave.
The next day he phones a gardener and asks him to put lilies there.
End of Flashback
And he said someday I hope you get the chance,
To live like you were dyin'.
"Excuse me, you want me to…what?" She sat up a little straighter, staring at him.
"I think you heard me the first time. Didn't I tell you enough? How it changed my life to know that it might be over soon? How I became a different person? I said I hope you will get that chance too, the chance to change your life. But I see you don't look convinced. So what about me getting a new plate of cookies and telling you how the story went on?"
He said I was finally the husband,
That most the time I wasn't.
And I became a friend a friend would like to have.
"Ten years ago, shortly after me and my husband had become an official couple, he had asked me for a large sum of money. I had given it to him without hesitation, but out of curiosity I had also demanded to know the purpose. I had already guessed he was bored with being at home alone all day long. Actually, I had expected it. My husband isn't that kind of person.
He then had told me about his plans to build and run a shelter for street kids. I had been very impressed with his ideas, had come to see the shelter at the opening day. But I had never again accompanied him there, although he had told me about its progress a lot.
But now I desired to see things I had never seen before, to take them with me to wherever I might go after my death in this world. So I went with him to his workplace.
Flashback
"Wow, Yami! This has changed a lot since I saw it for the first time!"
"But of course it has, love. Your company changed too."
"It wasn't this big last time. And it didn't have that garden! It's …truly beautiful."
"Thank you, Seto."
Just then the front door of the house flies open and children's laughter rings in the air. They run over to meet them, hugging Yami but glancing at Seto warily, making him feel a bit helpless. His husband is smiling, winking at him at seeing his helplessness. Then he picks up the smallest girl and talks to her.
"Look, Ana, what a tall man! Do you think he can touch the sky when he stretches up just a bit?"
Ana tilts her head, contemplating.
"Nah", she then decides flatly, "Only if I'm up on his shoulders."
Yami laughs and puts the girl down. "So do you want to ask the tall man if he'll let you sit on his shoulders?"
Ana nods and bites her lip. For a minute she is staring at Seto like some foreign animal then she suddenly grins.
"Mister, can I go up on your shoulders so I can reach up to the sky?"
She looks so adorable Seto just has to smile back at her.
"Anything for a little princess like you", he hears himself say, and then Yami lifts Ana up onto his shoulders and she's looking down from her throne at everyone, the sky forgotten.
Seto never had a thing for the kids of strangers, but at his husband's shelter, he gets to know some that remind him of himself at that age, especially young boys with a particularly cheeky but smart attitude. He even lets himself be persuaded to play chess with them.
On their way home Yami is very quiet, while Seto is wondering if he has done something wrong. But as soon as they are home, Yami pushes him against the nearest wall and starts kissing him like a starved man.
"You don't know how much this meant to me, love", he whispers between kisses, "Thank you so much."
End of Flashback
And all the sudden goin' fishing,
Wasn't such an imposition.
And I went three times that year I lost my dad.
"And it weren't only the children of strangers. I soon realised there were children in my family I didn't pay enough attention to. My nephew, for example. When he had been little, we had often gone fishing together. I remembered he had always wanted to hold the fishing rod but had been too small to do so. Now that he was old enough we had stopped that little habit because I had been too busy with the corporation.
One weekend I took him aside and asked him if he would like to try fishing again. With sparkling eyes he replied that he would love to do that.
Back when he had been a little boy, going fishing with him had felt like an obligation to me and I had only done it half-heartedly, always thinking about the lost time, especially when we didn't catch anything.
But now it was different. I suddenly noticed the silvery waves in the sunlight, the swaying birches and the little birds' singing. I saw gnats and dragonflies whizzing around above the surface. And I saw it all together with my nephew, while he told me in a hushed voice about school and his plans for the future, or even the girl he was going out with.
And suddenly I remembered I had gone fishing with Mokuba, my brother, when he had been a child, shortly after we had been brought to the orphanage.
Three times we had been sneaking out of there together to get to a little pond not far from it. We had never caught anything of course, but the things I had perceived there had been the same. It was a precious memory that had been lost for too long. Now I guarded it like a treasure."
Well I finally read the good book,
And I took a good long hard look at what I'd do
If I could do it all again.
And then.
"Have you ever dismissed something you wanted to do thinking, 'I can still do that when I'm old and my hair is white'? I had thought that every time I wanted to watch a movie or read an interesting book, but had been too busy with my job.
Now my hair wasn't white, it didn't even have these grey streaks. But since it would probably never grow white I sat down and read the books I had wanted to read forever, watched movies with my husband or brother, went for a walk on a sunny spring day.
And I looked at everything knowing it could be my last time to do so. Therefore I put all my heart into everything I did, and suddenly I felt complete, was satisfied like I had never been before."
Like tomorrow was a gift and you've got eternity
To think about what you do with it,
What could you do with it, what can
I do with with it, what would I do with it.
She looked away. Listening to him all he said sounded so reasonable, so true. Images from the past days resurfaced and she winced at the memory, but then she suddenly saw herself on top of a mountain, could almost feel the wind in her hair, could almost hear herself scream, scream out all the rage and anger and tears down into the clouds, onto the Earth's surface that she had left behind, could almost see the sun go down, taking her pain with it, bringing the night and the stars she would watch, cleansing her mind and then rise with the sun to a new morning.
Reborn.
What a feeling!
He had watched her with interest, smiled now when he saw the smile erupting on her face.
Fondly he let his mind drift back to all the things he had told her, dwelling in memories. The last one was reserved only for himself, he hadn't told her about it.
Flashback
Slender fingers run over his skin as a soft tongue licks the sensitive spots on his neck and kisses are placed onto his earlobe. He wraps his arms more tightly around the other's body, presses him to his chest. The other's hands still and fasten around his waist in return, he rests his head on his chest, hair tickling his neck that is still moist from the other's gentle licks.
"Look at that, love", Yami whispers, "They are flying, just like we did."
"Yeah, we did. Together." He tries to hold the other even closer, which is almost impossible. They are embracing, watching the eagles circle around in the sky and know they could stand like that forever.
"Kiss me", Seto demands, "I want to feel you. I want to fly again."
There is a smile on Yami's face as he leans up to meld their lips together. "Anytime, love", he says.
"I'll make you fly, right here, where the eagles soar. And tomorrow we'll try the real thing again."
End of Flashback
Sky divin', "And that is the end of the story. My surgery and chemotherapies were performed and one and a half year later I was more or less healthy again. Still, my life had changed completely and I couldn't have been more thankful for this illness."
I went rocky mountain climbin',
I went 2.7 seconds on a bull name Fu Manchu.
And I loved deeper,
And I spoke sweeter,
And I watched an eagle as it was flyin'.
And he said someday I hope you get the chance,
To live like you were dyin'.
"I think I understand now what you wanted to tell me", she said.
He took the last cookie and tossed it at her.
"Here, take this. Chocolate is an anti-depressant. Do you only understand it or do you feel it too?"
"I…"
"Go off and live, girl, you can't put a chance like this one to waste!"
"…I will. I…I promise, I will"
He smiled. Outside the sky was turning a soft rose colour, announcing the sunrise. She got up, suddenly feeling the weight of her troubles resting on her shoulders again.
He was good at reading people though. When she went to the door, he softly called after her.
"Mona! Your parents will forgive you, whatever you did. I'm sure they love you"
She sighed. "That's just a lame phrase. You don't even know my parents."
His answer surprised her. "Of course I do. I wasn't sure at first. Yet, the moment I saw you sitting there in the park I saw your mother, and when you opened your mouth to insult me for the first time, I heard your father. I knew then. You truly are the child of Mai and Katsuya."
Startled, she turned around. He smiled at her. "I didn't know they had moved back here. Tell them to phone me once in a while. I'm sure my husband would like to see them. Good luck to you now." He unlocked the door for her.
She nodded. "Thanks", she said, then she left. He watched her step out into the sunrise to start a new chapter in her life. Then he shook his head and went inside to make coffee for himself and his husband who would wake up soon.