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Summary: / Anakin-23; Obi-Wan-39 / What if Anakin had never lost his other arm and both his legs? What if the events on Mustafar happened differently? ( A lovely heart-warmer between a master and his padawan... )
A/N: This story starts from like the ending, and then goes back and retells what happens. Then it'll finish up with the rest of the ending. And viola. :P
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"Beautiful"
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Chapter 1
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You could be the devil in my bed
You could be the angel in my head
You could be the voices that I hear
I'm singing along because it sounds just like you're near.
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Obi-Wan Kenobi walked slowly down the once great halls of the Jedi Temple. Now they were full of dust, the large windows busted, their glass littering the area he walked. It'd been one year since The Order had been attacked, all those younglings and padawans killed.
He sighed sadly as he remembered the event, remembered how he'd felt when he learned that Anakin had been the one who had done it. He'd been in such disbelief...
/ No. / He said to himself, shaking his head. / I knew...deep inside...I knew. /
Stopping in the middle of the long hallway, he raised his head, the gloomy light of Coruscant shining upon him from the gaping windows. He hadn't changed much from that day on Mustafar, well...not his appearance anyway.
On Tantooine...in his dwelling of the caves of the sandy mountains...he found a voice of the past constantly haunting him. The times when his padawan would hum to himself...his voice seemed to reverberate around him, and sometimes he found himself humming along.
Even in sleep...his dreams never gave him any rest. Anakin haunted those, too...but sometimes they were of good, old memories.
He wasn't sure why he was here. The Force just kept pulling him toward this planet...this old home. Or was it just him?
Slowly looking over the jutting pieces of glass still hanging onto the window, he felt a hollow pain wash over his heart. / Not a day goes by that I don't think of how I failed. How could I have let you get that way?...It's all my fault. / He scolded himself.
He would not deny it...he truly had loved Anakin. So deeply. And he missed him everyday, even though he knew that this was something a Jedi should never do. Attachments like this, like the one he had formed toward Anakin, and still struggled to hold on to. It seemed that with each day, he let the Jedi Code slip further and further from him. But it was getting better...he was slowly letting go. Letting his precious padawan be erased from his thoughts.
"The Force brings us together. But for what?" A voice full of darkness resounded around him, though a hint of something Obi-Wan couldn't place lingered in its tone.
Lowering his blue-green eyes from the sky, Obi-Wan would place them on a black clothed figure making their way toward him with easy and deliberate steps. "Anakin." He breathed as the light cascaded over his old padawan's right side, leaving the left in shadow. How ironic...
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Cause you're so beautiful
You're beautiful today
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Anakin stopped about fifteen feet from Obi-Wan, standing there, his demonic eyes swirling with their deep yellow tint as he regarded his old master.
Obi-Wan took note that Anakin wasn't wearing his usual concealing disguise today, the one many throughout the galaxy knew and feared him in...he was simply dressed in the same clothes he'd battled Obi-Wan in on Mustafar.
"I am no longer, Anakin." He spat out with obvious displeasure. "My name is Darth Vader. What you once knew is gone..."
Obi-Wan looked over this Darth Vader with an expressionless face. / You're not Darth Vader...you're still Anakin to me...you're still there. / He let his hand raise slowly to his heart. / You're still right here. /
Anakin would look at him with uncomfortable puzzlement, his arms crossing, eyes dark. "You're a fool, Obi-Wan. Your coming here is your demise. I don't know how many of you are left, but I will soon find out...when you're bloody on the floor before me...begging for mercy."
Obi-Wan's brows furrowed at the image that presented itself in his head, and the pain that came with it in his chest. "Just as arrogant as ever..." He muttered. Anakin heard and flinched, his eyes narrowing unhappily.
/ Even angry... / Obi-Wan whispered inside his head.
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You're so beautiful
You're beautiful in every little way
Cause when you're coming around
I'm off of the ground
I've got to say
You're so beautiful
You're beautiful today
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"I move toward the future now, Obi-Wan. A greater future where I will rule the galaxy alongside my great master, Darth Sidious." Anakin said threateningly.
"How can you move toward the future, Anakin, if you've erased the legs of your past? You walk on nothing...you float in emptiness passing time by throwing your anger, that has latched onto you for years, at others..." Obi-Wan said firmly, hands fisted. "Darth Sidious controls you now. You're his puppet! Did he not promise you that he would save Padmé! Well, did he?" Obi-Wan nearly yelled.
Anakin burst in with rage. "YOU KNOW NOTHING!" He screamed, pointing at Obi-Wan. "YOU TURNED PADME AGAINST ME! YOU KILLED HER!"
Obi-Wan's mouth formed one solid line, his eyes flashing in the cloudy light. "Did I really, Anakin? Is that what you think?" He asked in a quiet, calm voice. "Is that really what you feel?"
Anakin growled. "Don't you give me that feeling shit! I've felt more than you ever have!"
Obi-Wan felt his heart skip a beat as some of Anakin's old blue color came back to his eyes, but it was short lived for it disappeared instantly. "Anakin-"
"STOP CALLING ME THAT!" He shouted furiously.
Obi-Wan's eyes narrowed. "I cannot call you what I do not believe in. You'll always be Anakin to me.."
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I could be the drug you can't resist
And I could be the antidote you missed
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Blue once more flashed in those darkened eyes, staying longer this time, but ultimately leaving. "You're a fool." Anakin said with a deep scowl.
"Call me so if you want, but I think you're confused on who the fool really is in this matter."
Anakin's eyes blazed with hate. "I'll kill you!" He yelled, his light saber out the next second, his form racing toward Obi-Wan.
/ You're still him...stubborn, conceited...impatient... / Obi-Wan thought, a rueful smile on his lips. He couldn't explain why he hadn't gotten out his light saber yet...Anakin was almost upon him.
And suddenly...he stopped.
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I could be the love you hate to fear
You're filling the hole inside your heart with feeling near to me
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"What's the matter? Weren't you about to kill me?" Obi-Wan asked absently.
Anakin frowned. "You're smiling...why?" He asked, voice low and lethal.
Obi-Wan's expression sobered immediately as he realized he was. "A strange moment for fond memories to come to me." He murmured before the blue of his light saber lit the dim hall, color clashing with the bright red of Anakin's blade.
Anakin remained stationary, his face was completely placid. "I hate you..."
Obi-Wan's face showed displeasure at the words. "Why?"
Anakin instantly retracted his red blade, but kept the saber gripped in his mechanical hand. "Hah! How dare you ask me why!"
Obi-Wan crossed his arms, his weapon in his right hand, blade gone as well. "No, really, I am rather confused." His face was the epitome of innocence.
Anakin felt annoyance fill him at that old amused spark in Obi-Wan's eyes. And yet...he found a part of him missing it; liking to look upon it once more...
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Cause you're so beautiful
You're beautiful today
You're so beautiful
You're beautiful in every little way
Cause when you're coming around
I'm off of the ground
I've got to say
You're so beautiful
You're beautiful today
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Recovering himself, Anakin proceeded to speak. "You took everything from me. You and the Jedi! You denied me everything. You denied me my love for Padmé-"
"Which was forbidden!" Obi-Wan interrupted. "You were warned!"
"How could I not love her!" Anakin yelled, throwing his hands to his sides. "It was the greatest thing I'd ever felt! The Jedi are fools to deny themselves what I felt for Padmé!"
"Because attachments lead to the Dark Side, Anakin! And where are you n-!" He stopped suddenly as his heart flinched within his chest, taking his breath. / It's all a lie...I was attached to Qui-Gon...it was hard to let him go when he died...and I am attached to you, Anakin...but none of this has led to the Dark Side.../ He stared at Anakin calmly, who was staring at him in confusion at his abrupt stop in words. / What turned you was the Force vision...it ruined everything... / "Would I have turned, Anakin?" He whispered.
Anakin frowned, taking a small step toward Obi-Wan, leaning a little, trying to hear him.
"Would I have turned if I'd known that Qui-Gon was going to die?" He asked louder, face twisted in indecision. "...I'm not sure...but I do know I would've done everything in my power to save him..." He looked into Anakin's eyes. "You had an unescapable choice before you...even if it was a lie. The Sith Lord offered you a way to save her..." Obi-Wan said hoarsely.
Anakin stood rigidly now, hanging on Obi-Wan's every word.
"How could you not take it?...If only I'd known...If only I could've helped you somehow! None of this would've happened!"
Anakin's eyes swirled blue inside of all that deep, dark yellow, his expression showing some kind of pain. "If I had told you when it happened...you would've shunned me, you would've said I had broken the Jedi Code! I would've been expelled, and you would've forgotten me!"
"No!" Obi-Wan snapped. "I wouldn't've forgotten you...even after all you have done now, I still remember you...everyday, Anakin...everyday." Obi-Wan spoke to him quietly.
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But can we make it through
Together we got to fly
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"Anakin...please, come away from the Dark Side, leave it behind! You still have a chance, I can see it!" Obi-Wan pleaded, his hand held out to his former padawan.
Anakin stared down at Obi-Wan's hand, vivid memories of Mustafar coming back to him. "I can't go back now."
"Yes you can!" Obi-Wan hissed. "You always can! I see the good in you, Anakin, even after all of this time. I can still see it...I will not deny that the Dark Side will always be in you one way or another...but you don't have to let it consume you, Anakin..."
Obi-Wan went silent for a few moments as he tried to control the emotions swirling inside of him. "You never gave faith to the Force, Anakin...all you drew from it was power...Look at you now. Look what the Dark Side has given you! Pain! Suffering!" He choked out. "Everyday you live, you see the terrified faces of the ones you kill...think Anakin...with every kill you make...your mother dies once again...over and over..."
Anakin's eyes blazed in fury at his words, before he spoke, voice on the verge of exploding. "How dare you speak of my mother in such a way!"
"It's the truth!" Obi-Wan shouted. "Innocents die under the Sith Lord's rule...little boys lose their mothers!"
With one indignant howl, Anakin threw himself at Obi-Wan, tackling him to the floor, their light sabers falling away from them.
"Liars! The Jedi are liars! Deceivers! They killed my family! They killed everything I held dear!" Anakin screamed as he straddled Obi-Wan, punching him across the face with his mechanical hand which was rolled in an angry fist.
Obi-Wan grunted as pain blasted through his left cheek, the metallic taste of blood in his mouth following. "No..Anakin...they're alive..."
Anakin's eyes widened considerably. "What?"
Obi-Wan waited a moment, trying to clear his spinning thoughts. He was taking a risk in telling Anakin this...he was going against Yoda's instructions...this could ruin all the hopes of the Jedi ever returning...and the galaxy would fall to darkness forever... "Luke...and Leia...two of them...your children. They're alive."
Anakin stared at Obi-Wan before grabbing his chin and turning his face to his, making him look him in the eyes. Blue and yellow whorled together, clashing with those wise blue-green orbs. "Two...You're not lying...how can you not be lying?" Anakin asked in frustration. "He told me they died!"
Obi-Wan's eyes narrowed. "He lied to you, Anakin. All he wants is your power...your strong bond with the Force. That's all he ever wanted. Please...Anakin, leave the Dark Side and come with me...we can raise your children...and then, together, we can put an end to the Sith."
Anakin remained there, on his knees, looming over Obi-Wan, face contorted, eyes showing the conflict warring away inside of him.
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Cause when you're coming around I got to fly
Don't you know...
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"You live for a dead future, Anakin. A future that rides on nothing but loneliness...why put yourself through that when you could live in the warm rays of the sun, watching over your children as they play..." Obi-Wan spoke quietly. "It's not too late...and in my eyes, it'll never be too late..."
Anakin's eyes fixed on Obi-Wan intently. "I don't deserve this..." He growled. "It IS too late, I've already killed hundreds of people! I would live a life haunted by the dead!"
"And you don't already?" Obi-Wan snapped. "You forget about forgiveness, Anakin...If you live in spite, pushing their voices from you...you'll never be free...you have to listen to each one...and then let it go."
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And I know
And I feel
That I could learn to hate just like you
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Obi-Wan noticed the bottom of Anakin's lip tremble ever so slightly before a choppy whisper escaped him.
"I hate you..."
A sad smile lingered on Obi-Wan's lips. "I know."
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And I know
And I feel
That you could learn to love just like me
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"I thought I had everything planned out...I was going to kill you...find the other Jedi, and kill them too so only the Sith would remain. But damned if you ruined it for me...I should've killed you when I first saw you..."
Obi-Wan couldn't help but chuckle lightly. "I guess I owe you one. After all, you've saved my life many a time."
Anakin's eyes narrowed. "You're impossible."
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Cause I know
And I feel
That I could learn to hate just like you
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Obi-Wan smiled. "You're not so possible yourself, my old padawan."
Anakin flinched at his words, looking away.
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And I know
And I feel
That you could learn to love...
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Obi-Wan's lips parted in dismay as Anakin turned his head, eyes settling back on him once again, only this time...they were all blue.
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You're so beautiful
( And I know... )
You're beautiful today
( And I feel...
That I could learn to hate... )
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Anakin solemnly climbed off of Obi-Wan, sitting heavily on the floor beside him, his expression calm, eyes distant. "I wish I could've been there for her...if...I...I just let her go...alone..." Anakin said shakily before looking down, his hands covering his face. "I let her die by herself! What kind of love is that!" He sobbed.
Obi-Wan stared in disbelief at Anakin's sudden change in mood. He was sure his former padawan was feeling the pain now of all those he'd hurt...finally letting down the walls he'd created to ignore the atrocities he'd committed. "She wasn't alone, Anakin. I was there with her...she believed in you. Believed in your goodness...right to the very end."
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You're so beautiful
( And I know... )
Beautiful in every little way
( And I feel... )
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Anakin's tear streaked face lifted to look at him, the very deepest of pains showing in those blue depths. "I shouldn't-"
"Stop it." Obi-Wan said firmly. "Just stop it...live through your pain, Anakin. You were always too quick to ride it off...to get rid of it...you must accept what has been given to you, only then can you truly find peace."
Anakin hiccuped softly, his hand coming up to wipe at his wet cheeks. "I hate the pain...I don't want it."
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Cause when you're coming around
I'm off of the ground
I've got to say
You're so beautiful
( And I know... )
You're beautiful today
( And I feel... )
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"Then share it with me, Anakin. You don't have to have it all. If anyone should help you carry it, it should be me. I was your master...I should've watched over you more closely...paid more attention...I failed you as a master."
"No." Anakin said firmly, blue eyes glowering at him determinedly. "I was selfish...I never listened to you...and yet you still put up with me...you were always so patient. I hated you for that...but...I also..."
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Can we make it through together
( Just like you... )
I've got to fly
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Obi-Wan offered Anakin a genuine smile. "I love you, Anakin..."
Anakin's jaw tightened at those words before he threw himself in Obi-Wan's arms, hugging him tight as sobs took over again. "I don't hate you...I don't hate you."
"I know..."
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TBC...?
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W00t! Well...wasn't that lovely?
I couldn't resist. That "Beautiful" song by Flickerstick just fit too good. I hope you liked. I realize that some parts were incredibly corny, so give me a break. This was an intended little treat for myself. Now I'm just sharing.
If I do continue this story, which I probably will, then I'll have it start from somewhere in Episode III, retelling what happened on Mustafar which will make a few things in this chapter make better sense.
Thanks for reading.
-Aryll