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Misunderstanding
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The fire snapped and crackled merrily, the orange light dancing erratically in the rapidly darkening clearing. They had set up camp near the edge of a clear stream with abundant fish, and evidence of that was speared on sticks and stuck close to the fire to cook. Sango and Kirara, noticable in their absence, had gone off to reconnoitre the next day's trail.
The rest of the group was positioned around the fire. Kagome was taking as much advantage of the fading light as she could, studying one of her multiple textbooks with Shippou in her lap peering curiously at the pages. Miroku was apparently meditating, eyes closed, while Inuyasha paced impatiently, his constant stream of low, unintelligible words a rumbling counterpoint to the cracks and pops of the fire.
"Osuwari!" The muttering finally snapped the thread of Kagome's patience, having frayed the one of concentration some time ago. Hanyou, meet Ground, she thought dryly as he dropped. "What is the matter with you?"
Inuyasha pried his face out of the dirt, spat out grass and earth, then growled. "That was uncalled for, Kagome!"
"Not really," injected Miroku mildly, opening his eyes. "It was getting on my nerves."
"If you have something to say, say it, don't march about grumbling," Shippou added helpfully.
"Keh!" The hanyou sat up, looking disgruntled and slightly disheveled by his recent forceful encounter with the earth. "If you want to know, I'm tired of eating nothing but fish everyday."
"Is that all?" Kagome asked incredulously. "For that you stomped about muttering for five whole minutes?"
"Not quite," Inuyasha corrected defensively. "Maybe about three."
"Fine," she snapped. "For that you stomped around muttering for three whole minutes spoiling my concentration?"
"Um," the hanyou demurred sheepishly. The way she put it made him seem like an inconsiderate child. It seemed quite a legitimate complaint four minutes ago..
Miroku, recognizing Kagome's expression and correctly interpreting it, sighed and shook his head.
"Well," Kagome said ominously, raising a sardonic brow. "If you're so tired of fish, then put your pacing skills to good use and go hunt us some dinner!"
"Wh-why should I, wench?" he demanded, looking faintly unsettled and making exactly the wrong move. He realized it too late.
"Go do it. Now." She tilted him a saccharine smile which made his hackles rise in instinctive defense. "Or.."
"Or what?" Inuyasha shot back in challenge. Unwisely, he knew, but the response came so easily to his lips that he could not take it back in time.
"O -"
Shippou snickered at the confused look on the hanyou's face; the houshi watched on interestedly.
"Su -"
Realization dawned.
"Wa -"
Inuyasha fled.
Those remaining around the fire howled with laughter.
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Inuyasha sulked contentedly as he trekked back to camp. He had surprised a coven of quail out of hiding and had a nice brace of six birds slung over his shoulder. Wench, he thought, rather fondly. Not that he really minded hunting for the group, but he had principles regarding commands. Threats, though.. he would teach Kagome a lesson for threatening him one day, but at the moment he was happy to play along.
The flickering light of the fire appeared. He was about to call out when he heard Kagome speak. Without really thinking, he darted behind a tree.
"I.. have something to show you guys.." she said hesitantly. There was a rustle of cloth. Inuyasha's ears perked up. Something to show them?
"Wow," he heard Miroku breathe, just barely within earshot. Shippou echoed the sentiment.
"They look really.. firm," the houshi said in an stunned whisper.
"They're huge," piped the kitsune's childish voice. The tone was such that Inuyasha could almost see the little fox's look of wide-eyed amazement. What was Kagome showing them? His mind, no doubt tainted by constant contact with a certain perverted member of their group, came up with an instant answer. She couldn't be.. could she? He listened intently.
"Of course," Kagome said; proudly, Inuyasha thought. "Only the best."
"No doubt," Miroku agreed faintly. "I've never seen such a nice pair."
In his opinion, that clinched it. The hanyou flushed with embarrassment and anger - and, he suspected, a goodly amount of jealousy as well. He could hardly keep from jumping into the clearing and interrupting their little conversation. With great effort, he restrained himself and continued listening.
"Can I touch them?" Shippou asked eagerly.
"And me?" Miroku added.
"Go right ahead!" Kagome replied, a bit too enthusiastically for Inuyasha's peace of mind. It was the last straw. Snarling with fury, he leaped out from behind the tree into the clearing..
And surprised a fully clothed Kagome, who had two enormous oranges in her hands and was in the process of handing them over. Well, Inuyasha thought weakly as he stumbled to a stop in the firelight, they were firm, and huge, and a pair.. His face burned so hot that he was sure he was glowing. His ears flattened in embarassment.
"Inuyasha!" Kagome said cheerfully. "You're back!" Her eyes travelled from the birds just visible over his shoulder to his reddened face. A concerned look crossed her face. "What's wrong? You seem a bit flushed."
"I-I, um," Inuyasha stuttered, wishing he could be a hundred leagues away. He was thankful that she hadn't seemed to notice anything out of the ordinary. "N-nothing." He snuck a sideways glance at the other two around the fire.
Miroku was smirking. Damn. Busted.
The houshi coughed softly. "I ah.. believe Inuyasha misunderstood our previous conversation.." His smile was wicked.
"Our previous conversation?" Kagome furrowed her brow over that. "About the oranges..?"
"I-it's nothing, really," Inuyasha tried to salvage the situation, all the while searching for possible escape routes.
Kagome finally caught on and blushed (a rather becoming shade, Inuyasha mused detachedly). "Y-you-" she glared daggers. If looks could kill, he would be six feet deep.
Unfortunately for him, her methods were rather more effective.
"Osuwariosuwariosuwariosuwariosuwariosuwariosuwariosuwariosuwariosuwariosuwariosuwariosuwari.."
By the time she ran out of breath, Inuyasha was well past being deep sixed; deep thirty-sixed might have been closer. He wished he had thought to look.
In a blaze of flame, Kirara swooped in from the skies and landed gracefully. Sango raised an eyebrow as she dismounted, taking in the scene before her; one deep, Inuyasha-shaped hole, one panting Kagome, one entertained Miroku and one scared Shippou.
"What did I miss?"
fin
Hope you enjoyed that as much as I enjoyed writing it! My first one-shot, and it was really fun.. Please review!
P.S. Inspired by one of the mini-movies in the Final Fantasy Flash movie on Go look at it, it's hilarious.