Disclaimer: Don't own anything so don't sue because all I have is a banana roll.

Summary: Alec thinks about his love for Max.

A/N: I hope you guys like this. If you do, please check out my other fics. I have a ton of MAs you're sure to like. Please review this and give me feedback!

After I lost Rachel, I didn't think I would ever be able to love anybody else. I had given her all my love, so I didn't think that there would be enough left in me to give to another person.

When Max came crashing into my life, she showed me how to care. She showed me that even little insignificant things that don't seem like much are worth fighting for, because they all add up. She befriended Joshua, and even though at first I was a little apprehensive of him, I now can understand why. Joshua's a great person despite the fact that he's a dog-man. I used to think caring was an illusion, that it wasn't real. I've learned that it's as real as it can get.

Alec saw an old lady scrambling for cans that she had dropped at her feet, and something possessed him to go help her. He quickly picked them up and put them in her bag.

"Thank you, young man," the old woman said gratefully.

Alec walked away feeling better than he had that morning.

My feelings for Max have grown so much that it's hard to control them. Sometimes I have illusions about possibly having a future with her, but at those I always laugh. Max's too head over heels for Mr. Eyes Only to even glance in my direction. I don't even know how I could think such unbelievable things, but I do. Because I sometimes think that maybe Max returns my feelings; if not in the same intensity, at least a little. Sometimes I catch her looking at me when she doesn't know, but no. It must be all in my head. Another grand illusion. I'm full of them.

Alec opened the door to Crash and stepped inside. His eyes immediately and unconsciously scanned the crowd to find who he was looking for. He finally spotted her, Sketchy and Original Cindy sitting at a table near the back of the bar. She was laughing so he stayed near the door and watched her. He loved watching her laugh; it always filled him with unexplained warmth.

I like seeing her happy. I don't see that too often. She's always down about the virus or something, and for some reason, it always seems to be my fault. But it's okay; I'll be there for her even though she doesn't want me to be. Watching, waiting…

Everyone says that the pain of losing a loved one eventually dulls over time, that it's still there but you don't really feel it anymore. I've always thought that that was one great illusion, but ever since I met Max, my pain has receded to almost non-existent.

Max felt a tingle at the back of her neck. Someone was watching her. She turned around and saw Alec standing near the door. He wasn't really doing anything, just standing there looking at her. She smiled slowly and watched as he smiled back.

Maybe my illusions aren't as big as I thought they were, he thought as Max made her way over to him. I always thought that maybe my great love for Max was all just an illusion to fill the spot in my heart that's empty and pained.

"Hey Alec," Max said softly, the smile still on her face.

Then again, maybe not.

A/N: How do you guys like this? Please review and give me feedback; I'd love to hear your thoughts. If you liked this, please check out my other stories. I've got quite a few MAs I'm sure you'll enjoy. :)