Entertainedbygrass: Thanks.

Techyelnerd: I know, my grammar sucks

Part 2

Scene 1: Robin's birthday

At the camp of the Merry Men

Robins runs excitedly out of his tent. Joan is sitting by the fire with a box. She looks and sounds tired.

Robin: Do you know what day it is today?

Joan: Your birthday

Allan plugs in his electric guitar and sings a rock version of happy birthday while Will and Friar Stacy present him with his cake. He looks exited and Joan hands him the box she was holding. And he opens it.

Robin: A snail!

Friar: Not just any snail, it's a racing snail.

Robin looks carefully at the snail and sees a little purple four painted on the shell.

Robin: I'm going to call him Geoffrey.

Joan; Wasn't that the name of one of your pigeons?

Robin: Yep

Joan decides not to argue and rolls her eyes. The Merry Men start eating the cake and a random brick flies from off camera towards Robin. He ducks it and it hits Will. Robin breaks it open and reads the letter inside.

Allan: Who's it from?

Robin: It's from Maid Marion; Prince Jon has sent Guy of Gisborne to arrest me.

Will: Guy of Gisborne, isn't' he that old homeless guy that talks to rocks?

Robin: Yep

Joan: What are we going to do?

Robin: This is a job for the merry pigeons.

Joan: The pigeons? What use are the pigeons?

Robin: Trust me on this one. Joan, come with me. The rest of you wait here.

Robin and Joan leave.

Scene 2: Guy of Gisborne

Sherwood Forest

Robin: Pigeons! Oh merry pigeons, where are you?

Guy of Gisbourne enters. He is an old man wearing a cape made from grey feathers.

Guy: You won't find them.

Robin: Yes we will.

Joan looks at Guy's cape

Joan: Um, Robin? The cape.

Robin looks at the cape.

Robin: No, not the pigeons!

Guy laughs.

Guy: They were delicious

Robin goes to attack Guy when he and Joan are suddenly surrounded by guards.

Robin: whispers. Right, this is the plan. I'll distract them by building a tower out of toothpicks while you make a lasso out of socks to tie them up and we'll use their bowstrings to make a rope to climb the trees to freedom.

Joan gives a look that says she doesn't think it's a good plan. They go to attack .

The camera cuts to the dungeons where Robin and Joan are chained to the wall.

Joan: (Sarcastically) Any more bright ideas?

Robin has managed to get his leg free and it straining to reach the keys on the other side of the room next to a sleeping guard

Robin: We need to get the keys

The guard wakes up and Robin quickly puts him foot back in the restraint. The guard goes back to sleep.

Joan: Sarcastically well we're a bit tied up at the moment in case you haven't noticed.

Robin suddenly grins

Robin: Geoffrey can do it!

Geoffrey the snail crawls out of Robin's pocket.

Joan: Robin, assuming he can understand you, and assuming he can get over there by next week, what makes you think he'd be strong enough to bring the keys back?

She shuts up in shock and surprise when she sees the snail crawling up the wall with the keys. Robin is unlocked from his chains and drops to the floor

Joan: So are you going to let me down now?

Robin holds Geoffrey

Robin: Apologize to Geoffrey first

Joan: Apologize to the snail?

Robin: You insulted him. Without him I'd still be chained to the wall trying to reach the keys with my foot.

Joan sighs with frustration

Joan: Alright. Sorry Geoffrey.

Robin: Say it like you mean it.

Joan: (Sincerely) Sorry Geoffrey, never again will I underestimate any of Robin's friends.

Robin unlock Joan, and before they leave the dungeon Joan steal the guard's sword.

Scene 3: Maid Marion

In the castle gardens

Maid Marion is sitting and talking to her Maid Joanne, when Will, Friar Stacy and Allan run in. Maid Marion stands up shocked.

Marion: How on earth did you get in here?

Friar: The guards were on a coffee break

Marion: Well what do you want?

Allan: Robin and Joan have been arrested; we need you to help us sneak them out.

Marion suddenly gets angry.

Marion: Robin? Robin Hood? As far as I'm concerned he can stay there and rot.

Friar: But I thought you liked him?

Marion: Like him? I can't stand the little worm!

Will: But if you don't like him, then why did you warn him about Guy of Gisborne?

Marion: That wasn't a warning that was a threat. I sent the letter to warn him that if he didn't stop stalking me, I would get Prince Jon to send Guy of Gisborne to finish him off.

Robin and Joan suddenly fall from the sky. Joan gets up and dusts herself off.

Joan: "Oh it'll be easy" you said "We'll just use this catapult to launch ourselves over the wall" you said. Well that's the last time I'm going along with one of your plans.

Robin sees Marion and gets up. He steps towards her.

Robin: Ah, hello Marion

Marion backs away

Marion: Don't touch me or I'll scream for the guards!

Robin: But Marion…

Marion: Don't you but Marion me!

Robin and Marion continue to argue.

Friar: Just like a married couple.

Joan looks around.

Joan: Where's Geoffrey?

Friar: Geoffrey?

Joan: Robin's snail, he got us out of the dungeon.

Narrator: They never saw Geoffrey again. The little snail had decided that the life of the Merry Men was not for him and had decided to seek his fortune on American Idol.

Allan: Well good luck to him

Marion: That's it, I'm going. I don't care if you get killed or arrested but if you follow me you will be sorry! Come along Joanne!

Marion leaves but Joanne stays behind.

Joanne: I can get you out of here.

Allan: You can?

Joanne: There's a secret passage under Prince Jon's throne, it will get you out

Marion calls from off Camera

Marion: Joanne!

Joanne leaves

Robin: You three go the way you came, Joan and I will take the passage

Will: But why don't we stick together?

Joan: Because if he catches us, he catches all of us. But if we split up he won't get us all, right Robin?

Robin: Actually I was thinking we all wouldn't fit down that passage

Friar: Works either way, let's go

Scene 4: Robin's death

Prince Jon's throne room

Robin and Joan are running towards the throne when Guy of Gisborne suddenly runs up and hits Robin over the head with a brick. Robin falls down and Guy starts laughing triumphantly, Joan runs him through from behind with the sword she stole from the sleeping guard in the dungeon. Guy falls on top of Robin. Joan drags Guy's body of Robin and kneels behind him.

Robin: Joan, I'm dying

Joan: Nonsense, you've been hit on the head with bricks before.

Robin: Yes, but Guy was holding a knife and it stabbed me when he fell on top of me.

Joan: Oh

Robin picks up his bow and fires an arrow out the window

Robin : Bury me wherever the arrow lands.

Robin dies. Sad music plays and the camera focuses on Joan and Robin's dead body as she starts crying. The camera zooms out, finally showing the window from the outside and the credits come up.

Bonus scene after the credits: Robin's funeral

The camera is focusing on Friar Stacy as she talks to Joan

Friar: are you sure this is what Robin wanted?

Joan: He said to bury him where the arrow landed.

The camera zooms out where Will and Allan are carrying a black bag with Robin's body in it. They push it down a dunny and there is a splat sound when it hits the bottom.

For those of you who don't know, a dunny is an outdoor toilet. A deep pit is dug in the ground, and a toilet (usually made from a paint can) is put on top of it.

This isn't necessarily the end if you want more. Originally Will Scarlet was a gay fashion designer, and Robin and Guy were going to have a fight with blow up hammers, but neither idea worked.