Rating: PG

Reason: Nothin dirty...

Disclaimer: Don't own a ruttin' thing. If I did, Firefly would be a mite bit cleaner, and still on the air.

A/N: This is my first Firefly fic... Thought I'd have a bit of fun with Mal and Inara and blame it all on Serenity...

Serenity's Play

Mal was angry with Serenity. She wasn't flying like she should be, hadn't been for the past hour or so, and Kaylee was having more than enough trouble locating the problem. Whatever in the 'verse it was, it was making Mal's precious Serenity buck to and fro in random ways at random times like an agitated horse.

And Wash was going to have to land on a barren moon so Kaylee could get a good look at things.

In the sealing corridor that linked the bridge to the mess hall, Mal stopped before passing Inara by.

He was opening his mouth to relay the news about the landing to her when Serenity violently tossed beneath his feet and Mal was hurled towards Inara by the ship's artificial gravity. He involuntarily shut his eyes and thrust out his hands to stop himself, hoping for his and Inara's sakes alike that they struck metal and not flesh or cloth.

Inara, being equally startled, let out a gasp and closed her eyes too.

When Serenity decided to stop her violent move and right herself, Mal found his hands resting on cool metal, luckily. He breathed a sigh of relief. But then he felt a cool breath decidedly more pleasant-smelling than his own brush against his face.

Instantly, his eyes snapped open.

Not two inches away, so did Inara's.

Mal would've stumbled away embarrassed had it been anyone other than Inara. But given his stowed feelings for her…

Subconsciously, Mal noticed that his hands had landed on either side of and just above Inara's shoulders on either side and their bodies were not much further apart than their faces. He had her effectively pinned to the wall…

Then, Inara moved to close the gap between their lips. Quickly, both pairs of eyes fluttered shut in expectation of the moment they'd both secretly dreamed of and wished for since they'd met…

And Serenity decided to help by bucking again and tossing the pair against the opposite wall.

Mal hit softer than he'd expected to, but was then struck by Inara as she too was caught by Serenity's gravity. Her momentum caused their lips to smash together rather violently…

The universe turned inward on itself and left Mal lightheaded.

Then Inara, realizing what had happened, hastily withdrew and moved off of Mal.

Quickly, angrily and embarrassedly all at once, his eyes opened.

"We're trapped," Inara stated, eyes flicking to either side of the hallway. It was hard to tell with her being an emotionally-taut Companion, but Mal thought she sounded annoyed and surprised.

His eyes confirmed that the thick doors at either end of the corridor had indeed slammed shut and locked automatically. And there was no way to get them open from the inside.

"Great!" exclaimed Inara. "Stuck in a hallway with you while Serenity tosses us around like toys."

"Ain't no better than me being stuck with you," Mal returned.

Inara turned hot brown eyes on him. "Hěn, I seem to remember you happily kissing me not sixty seconds ago!"

"Hěn, I seem to recall you just as happily kissing me!"

Now with her Companion calm shattered, Inara's hands balled into fists and her eyes were simmering right into Mal's.

"You think I enjoyed tasting your foul breath, Captain!"

"I think you did, Companion!" Mal spit her title out like she did his. "And you're an awful kisser, gào su!"

"Not so great yourself!"

"I'll prove you wrong!"

"How?" Inara started, skepticism in her eyes.

Quickly, Mal moved to her and cupped her chin with one hand. The spark in her eyes died as she leaned in to meet his kiss eagerly. Their lips met and they were both in paradise. Mal's hands moved to cradle her head from behind and her hands clasped behind his head, toying with his hair.

When they parted, Mal softly whispered, "See? I told you…"

Inara rolled her eyes. "Just shut up and kiss me, Mal."

Rejoining their lips, neither one noticed Serenity had stopped tossing them around.

-----

Zoë peaked an eye through the sealed door's window at the Captain and the Companion, intertwined in each others arms. "At it again," she commented.

At Serenity's helm, her husband flashed a smile. "So the plan worked?"

"Oh, yeah, it worked," Zoë said with another glance through the window.

"I'll radio Kaylee and tell her she can stop the engines' fits."

Zoë stopped Wash with a hand and a smile. "Oh, no. They're happy. Let 'em be."

THE END

Mandarin Translations:

hěn-Well

gào su-just so you know