Disclaimer: Stargate: Atlantis and all related characters are the property of Metro-Goldwyn-Mayer Studios Inc, the Sci Fi Channel, World Gekko Corp, Double Secret Productions, and Acme Shark. No copyright infringement is intended. This story is for entertainment purposes only and no profit is being made here.

Category: Gen/Humour, with a smidgen of JE

Timeline/Details: Roughly early Season One, One-shot

A/N: My very first foray into Stargate: Atlantis (yay!). Though, given the number of extraordinary stories on this site, it's pretty much an incredibly nerve-wracking experience. :wilt: I am, however, keeping my fingers crossed in the hope that you'll have an enjoyable read anyway. I'd very much love to hear your thoughts on the story, so do send me a review. Like always, any similar plot, planets, characters, etc, is purely coincidental and entirely by chance. Hugs to sHoT for the beta.

-O-

They were in the middle of an intense, no holds barred, staring contest when his radio chirped.

"Major Sheppard, what's your position?" demanded the tinny, but unmistakably irate male voice, whom he immediately recognised as one Dr Rodney McKay. He groaned inwardly. A lot of good that did – unless he managed to get his hands on that radio, McKay could talk until the cows came home and he'd still be bound to the same damn cold, metal chair. Once again, John shot silent curses at the woman in front of him as he tugged angrily at the ropes holding him immobile.

"I asked for those scanners over forty minutes ago, Major, and you know how annoying Carson can get when he's impatient," Rodney went on, his disgruntlement at the delay apparent even through the intermittent static of the radio. Oh yeah, the physicist was definitely on a roll now.

Blithely ignoring the indignant exclamation of "Rodney!" from the exasperated medical doctor, the Canadian continued testily, "And exactly how long does it take for one to get to the Jumper and back anyway? This might not be… No, wait…actually, this IS the perfect time to remind you that I distinctly suggested, several times, if you remember, that you park the thing nearer to the village… but noooo…"

Raising a slim eyebrow in surprise at the seemingly endless stream of words currently emitting from the radio, she broke eye contact and strolled over the small table where she'd placed everything that she'd taken off him while he'd been unconscious, vest and weapons included. Flashing him a wicked grin, she ignored his muffled grunts and renewed struggles as she reached over and picked up the small communication device.

Things were certainly turning out to be a lot more interesting than expected.

"Hello? Major? You're not ignoring me again, are you?" A beat. "You are, aren't you? Look, Major, for the last time, I'm sorry I sat on your lunch. Although, technically, might I remind you once again that it was not my fault? How was I supposed to know that the bench wouldn't hold? And what on earth possessed you to put it underneath the thing in the first place anyway? Sheppard? Are you listening…?"

"I'm terribly sorry," she spoke into the small, black box, interrupting the tirade in a singsong manner. "But I'm afraid… Major Sheppard…?" She quirked a brow. What an odd sounding name. "Well, he's unable to take your call at present…"

"What?" Rodney spluttered in surprise before asking uneasily. "Wait a minute, who is this?"

"Oh, no one in particular," she answered lightly, turning her attention towards the man across the room. Once again, she couldn't help but to admire his intriguing green eyes and unruly hair, as he continued to glower, narrow-eyed, at her. In all her years, she'd yet to come across eyes of that unique shade of colour.

How absolutely lovely. Mar'lek was right. He was definitely going to earn them a fortune.

The fact that Major Sheppard was openly fighting against his bonds and cursing her for all that he was worth, despite being in restraints, only served to amuse her further. Tightly bound and gagged, it was obvious that he was not the best position to rub his captor the wrong way, but that particular disadvantage hadn't stopped him from being thoroughly defiant.

A refreshingly admirable, though admittedly, totally dangerous, trait to possess, especially during these uncertain times. Another commodity merchant might not have been so… appreciative of the silent threats being sent their way, which made her exceedingly glad that she'd gotten to him first. But then again, she'd expected nothing less than total defiance – seeing that he obviously wasn't the usual run of the mill soldier. Not that she'd put much stock in them, but there had been rumours that he and his friends had in fact arrived from the fabled City of the Ancestors.

She didn't delude herself; she was well aware that it had been only by pure chance, or as Mar'lek would put it – sheer dumb luck – that she'd managed to even get her hands on this man. Even caught off guard – isolated from his friends and cut off from all forms of communication – the jamming device that Mar'lek had provided her had worked perfectly; he'd been exceptionally difficult to take down.

Which made the victory all the sweeter.

At first, she'd thought that she'd failed, especially when he'd successfully eluded all her traps, all the while cautiously making his way back to the village, since she'd made sure that the Ring of the Ancestors was completely inaccessible to anyone travelling alone. And she knew that she would have returned empty-handed, if he hadn't stopped to help that little boy, who had inadvertently stumbled into one of her traps. Quickly taking advantage of the unexpected distraction, she'd quickly taken him down with one well-placed shot of the dart.

Not bothering to hide her grin, she sent the hapless but clearly incense man a saucy wink before turning her attention back to the voice over the radio, which was now demanding, quite rudely, she thought, to speak to her hard won prize.

"...and where's Major Sheppard? Is he all right? What have you done to him?"

"Nothing… much," she countered with a soft laugh, eyeing the man in question as he continued to struggle ineffectually against the ropes binding him soundly to the chair.

"Oh, please. Why do you people always use that line?" Rodney shot back witheringly, sarcasm dripping off each word. "Nothing much? What does that mean, exactly? In the first place, how can much be nothing? Not to mention that there's the…"

She watched her handsome captive with deepening interest as the man on the communication device rambled on – he was turning an interesting shade of red, and for once, since he'd woken up, Major Sheppard was glaring at the radio instead of her. Her attention returned to the device in her hand when a second voice piped in heatedly, cutting the first speaker off in mid-rant.

"Rodney!"

"What! Oh… right, sorry. Hello? Are you still there?"

"Yes," she replied, faintly bemused by the barrage of fast-flowing words from her conversation partner. Briefly, she wondered about the second man – the owner of the unusually accented voice. "Still here."

"Good, good. Well, I'd like to speak to Major Sheppard now."

"Sorry, but I'm afraid that's not possible."

"What? And why not?"

"Let's just say he's a little tied up at the moment," she answered smoothly, pivoting around to face the table. She continued before he could respond to her rather ambiguous statement, "But don't worry, Major Sheppard is in the best of health. A little groggy but nothing a little fresh air won't cure. Bye now."

Switching off the radio in the middle of another squawk of indignant protest, she stuffed it back into one of the pockets of the flak jacket before walking over to her dark-haired captive. Slowly, she bent down so that they were face to face. Naturally, he glared back.

"Now… where were we?" she asked with a grin, ignoring his fierce frown and muffled attempts to yell at her. "Ah, yes, I was just going to tell you that you are one of the best specimens we've managed to collect so far." Cocking her head to one side, she studied parts of his face not covered by the gag with some curiosity. "Are there many like you out there? Where you're from, that is? Never mind… I'm sure we'll be able to find out that particular fact for ourselves soon enough."

Straightening, she removed a small apparatus from her side pocket. Before he could jerk his head away, she'd injected its contents into the left side of his neck. His eyes glazed over almost immediately, and she watched until his eyelids closed despite his best attempts to keep them open, and his head dropped forward onto his chest. Satisfied that he was soundly asleep, she untied the ropes before signalling to her men to carry him outside, along with all his gear.

"Be careful. I don't want him injured in any way," she reminded them firmly, watching as they carefully placed the unconscious man into the transport vehicle. She could never understand why some merchants liked to present their merchandise all bruised and battered – personally, she'd always preferred to have her stock in the best of health. A little drugged, perhaps, but otherwise unharmed.

"He's all set," the burly guard reported and she nodded, satisfaction lighting up her face. There was nothing like arriving at a price after a good haggle.

"Good. Let's get going. I have a sale to complete."

O o O o O o O

She took another quick glance at where she'd left her latest acquisition to make sure that he was still properly secured to the chair – and had to grin at the drunken smile that was currently gracing his handsome features. Even in an inebriated, semi-conscious state – an unfortunate side effect of the stimulant used as a temporary counter to the sedatives in his bloodstream, (how else was she going to show off his eyes?) – he was apparently charming to the end. She could only imagine the havoc he could cause if he were in full control of his faculties.

"Excuse me…" a voice spoke up amidst the chatter in the building, breaking into her thoughts, and Kay'le turned towards to it as the owner continued in a tone that clearly brooked no argument, "I'd like to take him…"

Quickly concealing her surprise, she took in the speaker's appearance – dark wavy hair with wide green! eyes. It was a slightly different shade of colour – though unfortunately, not valued as much here because of the incorrect gender – but perfectly beautiful nonetheless.

Pushing the thought aside, Kay'le waved a hand towards the small, round table in the middle of the room. "Please, join me."

It was transaction time.

O o O o O o O

"Well?" the lovely woman asked, raising a dark brow, after several tense minutes of rapid bargaining and discussion. "Do we have a deal?"

For a brief second, Kay'le was tempted – oh, so tempted – to say no, and keep this Major Sheppard for herself, despite the startling amount of money that was currently being offered for him. He was undeniably attractive, and the opportunity to capture someone like him might never come her way again. As a matter of fact, she was certain she'd just used up her one and only chance of ever getting the upper hand on him – Major Sheppard came across as someone who would not make the same mistakes twice.

However, she was also convinced that he would be nothing but trouble, despite what little she'd seen of him. By keeping him, she realised that she would probably have to break that magnificent spirit of his, and that would be a total waste of a good man.

Besides, she mused as she studied the woman before her, catching a glint of an undefined emotion that glittered briefly in those jade eyes looking steadily back at her, she has always been a sucker for happy endings.

Reaching out her hand, she accepted the bag of coins, ignoring the sudden vociferous protests from the other women, the sound deafening in the confining space of the crowded building. "Yes, we have a deal."

O o O o O o O

"You think they'll ever return?" asked the voice beside her and she flashed the speaker a quick grin before bringing the vision enhancer back up to her eyes. She didn't want to miss a single detail. The six individuals standing anxiously in front of the Ring of the Ancestors, and instinctively forming a protective circle around an unmoving seventh, were without doubt the most fascinating bunch of people she'd come across in a long while.

Apart from Major Sheppard and the woman who bought him, she'd discovered, to her delight, that there were at least two others who possessed interesting, albeit dissimilar, eye colouring. Not as unusual, but noteworthy nonetheless. From what information that she'd managed to gather, one was a doctor while the other was apparently the man she'd spoken to over the radio.

The remaining three members consisted of a young woman, whom her sources had identified as Teyla Emmagan of Athos, as well as two other young men – one of whom had accompanied Major Sheppard's procurer from the Ring. The moment the small group disappeared through the large stone circle, bringing with them their unconscious friend, she turned towards the petite woman beside her and gave her light shrug.

"I hope so."

"You would. Can't say I share the sentiment, though. As it is, I'm just glad that everything went well."

"Why? Were you worried that it wouldn't?"

"Could you've blamed me?" Mar'lek shot back, shaking her head. " They were carrying weapons! For a moment, I really thought that they were going to use force to get him back. You know as well as I do that the visitors spent a bit of time watching the trade post before they finally retreated and returned with their representative for the sale."

Kay'le nodded and smiled at the memory of the woman. "She was lovely. I've been wondering if she was his mate. Any idea?"

"No. Is that why you sold him to her?"

"I don't know," Kay'le answered candidly. "Maybe. Although I could have sworn there was something in her eyes when she looked at him…"

Mar'lek rolled her eyes at the look on the other woman's face. "Of all the commodity merchants on the planet, I just had to end up partnering a closet romantic."

Kay'le chuckled. "Well, you know what they say, it's a lot better than having one who is a psychotic murderer any day."

"True," Mar'lek conceded, mimicking her best friend's wistful tone. "But not by much though…" she finished and quickly moved away, skillfully dodging a playful swat from the taller woman.

"Brat."

"Neurotic," Mar'lek countered immediately, but without any heat, a similar fond smile gracing her pretty features. Growing serious, she turned her dark gaze back towards the now silent ring. "Why do you think they decided not to attack?" Receiving a pointed look, Mar'lek clarified softly, "I know that there were more than the usual number of guards left outside the trading post, but..."

"But nothing," Kay'le interrupted. "There were also a lot of women and some children inside as well."

"And you knew that they wouldn't attack because of all the other people around."

"I was counting on it."

"That was some risk you took. How could you've been so sure?"

Chewing on her bottom lip, Kay'le considered her reply for a moment before answering, "I don't know. I guess I just did. Maybe it was how he stopped to save the child even though he knew that he would be putting himself out in the open when he did so."

"One day, you're going to be wrong and…"

"I know, I know," Kay'le lifted a hand to forestall the start of a very familiar reprimand, one that had been repeated once too many times, especially of late. She said sincerely, "I'm sorry, Mar'lek. I promise to be more careful the next time and to avoid taking such huge risks."

The older woman shook her head, but decided to let matters rest for the moment. It had been a long day for the both of them. "He wasn't hurt, was he?" she asked instead, frowning slightly at the memory. "He appeared so still when they took him through the Ring just now."

Kay'le shook her head. "Just sleeping off the remnants of the second dose of sedatives I gave him immediately after the sale. He should be awake in a few hours."

"That's good to know."

"Yes, it is," the commodity merchant murmured distractedly, speaking almost to herself. "I wonder…"

"What?" Mar'lek asked suspiciously when the sentence trailed off. She'd recognised that look anywhere. The woman was definitely up to something. "Kay'le…?"

"What? Nothing…" Kay'le responded, much too quickly for her friend's peace of mind. She caught sight of the glare and grimaced. "Really! Relax, will you? Sheesh… and you call me neurotic."

After shooting the younger woman another wary look, Mar'lek turned her attention back towards the far off clearing where the Ring was located. For a time, a comfortable silence enveloped the two friends as they stood there, each lost in their own thoughts. Then…

"Mar'lek?"

"Hmm…?"

"How much do you think we'd be able to get for the ones with…?"

"Oh, no… don't even think about finishing that sentence."

"What?"

"You heard me…"

"But…"

"No."

"Spoilsport."

"Maniac."

"Wet blanket."

"Psychotic."

"Okay, seriously… blue is pretty wonderful…"

"Yes, and so is life. And, for your information, I was being serious."

"C'mon, you had to admit that the entire experience was fun… in a death-defying kind of way. Besides, where's your sense of adventure?"

"I'm not admitting to anything. And I left my sense of adventure, as you're so nonchalantly calling it, back at the trade post."

"But Mar'lek…"

"No means no, Kay'le, do you hear me? We're not going after any more Atlanteans, and that's final."

"I thought you didn't believe that they were from the City of the Ancestors."

"Don't change the subject." A beat. "Kay'le?"

A huff of breath was expelled with more force than necessary before the younger woman conceded darkly, "Oh, all right, fine. I'll leave the Atlanteans alone..."

"Good."

Indistinct grumbles filled the surrounding air for a few seconds after Mar'lek's response, then one word filtered through the almost inaudible mutter: "Chicken…"

"I heard that…!"

The End