Drowning in the Rain
Disclaimer: The Harry Potter world is owned by none other than J.K.Rowling (lucky person) I do not own it, neither do the million other fans out there. I'm just playing in her world.
A/N Hey guys tiz meh! Feeling very heartbroken at the moment since my boyfriend cheated on me for my best friend and I caught them at it. I decided to write this, but couldn't find the right words to describe what a broken heart feels like, trust me you know how they say it feels like and arrow threw the heart? They seriously underestimated.
I hate him. I hate the way that he looks at me, I hate the way he smiles and makes me feel dizzy, I hate him. I can't stand him, he drives me insane. The way he turns everything I say into something that suits him, the way he makes me blush by the mere way he says my name. I hate him, he drives me insane.
I hate the fact that he's dangerous and that alone makes him more appealing. I hate the way I have to watch if he flicks his long blonde hair back out of his eyes, I hate it when those blonde locks catch the light making him look like an angel. I hate him; he is no angel probably the devil himself. I feel insane when I yearn to touch his pale face; I mentally slap myself for each of these dirty thoughts. They burn marks around my head slowly erasing everything I once knew until only sweet images of him remain. It drives me insane.
It drives me insane when I don't get an answer right in class because I'm thinking of him, I hate it when I day dream about his angelic like features and forget to take notes. He's ruining my life. I hate it when I'm down wind of him and the breeze blows by quickly pushing his intoxicating smell into my nose forcing me to remember him.
I hate it how I wish the boys around me would smell like him to.
I'm going insane. I'm sure my mind is slipping because when a teacher asks me a question in class and I'm forced to look at he, or she, I don't see a stern mouth or a hooked nose, I see him. I'm mad, barking mad. I hate it how I want to touch his soft lips or just have him alone in the library all to myself so I can show him what he does to me.
But what I hate most of all is that he can never be mine; he can never be closer then a desk away from me.
He can never lay his head on my chest and feel the way he makes my heart skip a beat. No, he never will be able to share these things I feel, he can never know what goes on inside my head. I hate the way he drives me insane with my suffocating love.
I hate her. I hate the way she answers everything right and makes me look like a fool. I hate the way she's so kind to Longbottom and whispers answers in his ear. I wish she would whisper to me. I hate it when she laughs and jokes with her friends because she will never laugh and joke with me. I can't stand her, she's driving me insane.
Every girl I snog in an abandoned classroom suddenly grows her long frizzy hair and almond brown eyes. She must be using a potion to bewilder my senses because I don't feel normal. I hate it how she doesn't care about getting dirty while all the others girls shriek about breaking a nail. I hate the way she's so adorably different.
I hate the way she makes me think about her all the time so I miss out on insulting those I most hate. I hate the way she revolves round my mind saying 'no you shouldn't do that'. It's driving me insane. I hate the way her sweet voice never calls out my name, only ever when she is angry, but oh how pretty she looks even in anger.
I hate the way she makes me undress her with my eyes, I hate it how she wears extremely loose fitting clothes so I have to use my imagination to see what is hidden beneath. I hate it how all girls wear thick layers of makeup and still she stands by her own principles and doesn't wear any.
I hate it how she's so strong willed and never seems to back down even if the person holding danger is two feet taller than she is. I hate the way the other guys look at her and she is completely unaware of their stares. But most of all I hate the way I will never be able to tell everyone that I want her, or that she is mine. I hate the way she drives me insane with my suffocating love.
"Oh sorry Malfoy" Hermione said as she accidentally knocked into him, scattering his books to the floor.
"Watch it Mudblood" Draco said as he bent down to pick up his books, she held back Harry and Ron by holding up a hand. He could see in her eyes a pang of hurt but he shrugged it off, she should be use to it by now.
"I wasn't sorry for knocking your books down, you should learn to pick stuff up for yourself, I was feeling sorry for your mother because she has you for a son" Turning her head she walked off with Harry and Ron snickering behind her. How dare she insult me! Draco thought.
But as he sped through his classes (each time staring at the back of her head) he thought of what he's mother once told him. "You know no love until it hurts Draco, remember that" It couldn't be love could it? He couldn't love a mudblood! He just couldn't! That's disgusting! Unthinkable! Unrealistic! But oh how she made him want her…why oh why did she have to be born a mudblood? If she were a pureblood he wouldn't be holding back. None of the Slytherin males would.
The weeks went by quickly and he thought of her. He noticed the little things about her, the way soft wrinkles appeared in her forehead when she read a complicated book in the library, the way something sparkled in her eye when she was with Scar head and weasel boy, or when she thought no one was watching her she would stare off into nothingness with pain in her eyes. How he would like to cure that pain.
Oh how he wants her.
Hermione walked along with Harry and Ron beside her completely unaware of their conversation, she was thinking about other things. She didn't notice when Ron slipped his arm around her waist and pulled her closer to him, she just closed her eyes and imagined someone else holding her.
Through the day the clock went by slowly and Hermione found herself weak. She didn't know why. Is she sick? Does she have a fever? She didn't notice Harry and Ron's concerned eyes, but she did notice his. It seemed time had stopped when they met eyes in that potions classroom. She will never forget. His grey eyes bore deep, digging inside her, trying to find her soul. She did her best to send the same look back his way.
But then Crabbe knocked him and their magical gaze was broken.
Hermione didn't know why but that night she cried herself to sleep. And the night after she did as well. After their magical stare it became a ritual for Hermione to let the tears burn tracks down her cheeks. At night she went to bed early and cast silencing charms on her bed, she wouldn't let herself be heard by others, her pride would not allow it. Sometimes she even broke down in the showers and sunk to the floor holding herself letting the tears mix with the shower water. If it wasn't for the silencing charm the whole school would have heard her cries echoing from the pipes.
Sooner than was possible the term came to a close. They were to board Hogwarts express that afternoon and go home forever, finally finishing their seventh and final year of Hogwarts. Hermione cried harder, and Ginny held her close thinking it was because she would miss Hogwarts.
No she would miss him.
Gathering all the strength she had left Hermione walked off Hogwarts express and into the arms of Mrs. Weasley, she was staying at the burrow since her parents were victims of war. Moving away Hermione let Molly hug the rest of her children, smiling sadly she stared at the nameless faces surrounding her each greeting loved ones, then she saw him. He was staring right back at her.
Hauntingly his father grabbed him by his shoulder, dragging him away.
She was sure her heart broke then. At that moment she knew she would probably never see him again. At that moment she completely lost her mind and ran through the crowd trying to find him desperate to hold him, to kiss those tender lips, to gaze into those grey eyes. She needed Draco Malfoy. She loved him.
Ignoring the shouts of Harry and Ron Hermione pushed her way through the crowd following the bright blonde head in the sea of brown. Gasping for breath she stopped and looked around at the many taxis and cars in the car park, she had just seen him here where did he go!
Then she saw.
He was getting into a Mercedes, a black one, with his father. She couldn't let him get away; she needed to tell him how she felt. Hermione didn't care about his dad, he could kill her if she want, but if Malfoy could know how she loved him she would die happy.
Running as fast as her legs could carry her she skidded to a halt at the window of the car Draco Malfoy was in. He turned and looked up at her, he jumped in surprise and his dad turned to look at what startles him. Seeing her he mouthed something at Draco but Draco couldn't move. With all the strength she had Hermione said three words very clearly to the afternoon air.
"I love you"
Malfoys dad roared with laughter and yelled at the driver to drive on, Draco Malfoy sneered at the girl through the window and turned his head away from her facing the front. He didn't turn quick enough though because he saw her heart break the moment he sneered, he saw her insides crumble and he felt her blood freeze. He knew all this because his own heart broke the moment he sneered. His own insides crumbled and his own blood froze.
As they drove away he saw in the mirror Hermione sink to the ground on her knees. He saw tears burn her face but soon they were masked by the rain that fell down upon her broken form. Draco Malfoys car turned the bend. That was the last time he ever saw Hermione Granger.
A/N Thanks for even bothering to read. Don't have to review (I hardly ever do, sorry!) kisses to you all (no I'm not a lezbo, my friend is though if you wanted to know) muah muah!