Teen Titans Fan Fiction

Condolences

By Kraven Ergeist

A/N: Well, I just finished the last episode. And frankly, it depressed me. While its quality was undeniable, the fact of the matter is that Beast Boy is still left without anyone to hold onto. In lieu of this, I've decided to write this fic.

I've also decided to drop off my other Teen Titans story arc, simply because it was too divergent from the series. My interpretation of Azerath and Raven's history was just too different from the actual storyline, and I just can't take the fact that I was so far off.

To make up for this, I've decided to give you this instead. I may continue this, but don't hold me to it.

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Things change. But not always for the better. Beast Boy could tell you this. He could tell you how in a single day, every hope you've ever had could disappear. Every good thing you thought you had in your life could go away. Simply because it had to change.

He had barely left his room after it happened. After he'd lost Terra for the second time. He had been so sure the girl he had seen was her. But she wasn't. She had lost her memory…or been reincarnated…or had a twin sister…or something. Whatever the reason, Beast Boy was forced to face the truth.

She never would be coming back.

"Beast Boy?" Robin knocked on his door. "When are you going to come out? We're all kind of worried about you."

Beast boy sighed. Of course, Robin would be concerned. As leader of the group, it was his responsibility to ensure the safety of his team.

"I'm fine, Robin, really…" Beast Boy said, as he laid back on his bed. The light was on, but it still felt dark.

A little while later, Cyborg came knocking on his door, asking the same question.

Good old Cyborg, concerned over his buddy. Not much he could do about it, but it was the thought that counted.

"I'm fine, Cy, really…" Beast boy called out to the closed door.

But he wasn't. He might never be. Not until something convinced him that there was a reason to hold on to anything. He'd witnessed firsthand how fleeting everything of value could be.

Cold and lost, Beast Boy turned over and lingered on in the darkness.

xxxxx

"Guys, I'm really worried about him," Robin said to the rest of the team, gathered in the main room.

"I agree," Starfire nodded. "He seems to be suffering from…depression, yes?"

Cyborg shrugged. "Guy's just hung up over Terra. He'll get over it eventually."

Robin shook his head. "Eventually isn't good enough. If he's this depressed, it's going to be bad if we need him in battle. It could even start affecting his health."

Starfire put her hands together. "Should I try offering the 'condolences?'"

Robin nodded. "I think we all should." He threw a glance over in Raven's direction. "That includes you, Raven."

Raven, who had been currently engrossed in a book, looked up. "Me? What am I supposed to say to him?"

Robin sighed. "Anything, Raven. Anything to let him know that we're here for him."

Raven shook her head. "I don't know, Robin…I'm not really good at that kind of thing."

Robin smiled. "I seem to recall him being there for you after that episode with Malchior."

Raven blushed, looking away. "How'd you know about that?"

Robin shook his head. "I think you owe it to him, Raven."

Starfire offered Raven one of her trademark smiles. "Oh, yes Raven! Words of condolences from you would mean worlds to Beast Boy!"

Raven blinked. "From me? What makes me so special?"

Starfire scratched her head, thinking. "Well…because you are Raven!"

The dark girl just sighed. "Fine. Whatever."

xxxxx

"Friend Beast Boy!" came Starfire's flighty voice. "How have you been doing, locked up in your room for three days?"

Beast Boy sighed. Starfire. The girl cared about everything under the sun, it was no surprise that she was concerned. "I'm fine, Starfire…I just need some time to myself."

From the other side of the door, Starfire shrugged, turning to give Raven a nod.

Raven frowned. "He said he needed time to himself."

Starfire shook his head. "I do not think that is what he needs."

Raven looked away blushing. She didn't deny that Beast Boy needed help, but why did it have to be her? The idea of going in there to talk to the boy was…

She couldn't finish her thought, however, as Starfire shoved the girl up to the door, took one of her fists and knocked on the door.

"Starfire!" Raven gasped under her breath.

The redhead just grinned. "You would not have knocked had I left you alone."

Raven blushed. "I was…going to do on my own…"

There was a muffled sound from inside the door. "Yeah?"

Starfire smiled at Raven one last time before heading down the hallway.

"Um…Beast Boy?"

Inside, Beast Boy paused. "Raven? What's up?"

Raven hesitated. "I…everyone's worried about you. Why won't you come out of your room? Usually it's my job to be the recluse."

She heard Beast Boy sigh behind the door. "Things change. Why are you asking? I didn't know you cared about what I did."

Raven caught herself blushing. "I…don't…"

She cursed herself. Why did she say that? It sounded so…heartless. That probably made things worse. She had to say or do something to revive the conversation.

"So…are you gonna let me in or not?"

There was another pause. "The door's open."

Raven slowly pushed the door open, wondering what she had gotten herself into. As she suspected, the room was a complete mess, with laundry, toys, magazines and old pizza crusts scattered everywhere.

"Well, I can see you've been living healthy," Raven sighed as she stepped in.

"Nah," Beast Boy said, sitting up from his bed. "My room always looks this way."

"I see," Raven nodded. That hadn't precisely improved her opinion of him.

"So, now it's official," Beast boy said. "Robin's concerned, Cyborg's concerned, Starfire's concerned, and now, even you're concerned. I must really have hit rock bottom."

Raven bit her lip. "Is this really all about Terra? What did you see in that girl, anyway?"

Beast Boy shook his head. "It's not just about Terra. It's everything. I can't help but feel like everything's out of my control. Like no matter what I do, I can't really do anything that's not just going to be undone at some point."

Raven shook her head. "Stop being so pessimistic, Beast Boy. You're not good at it."

Beast Boy frowned. "Maybe I'm just finally realizing the hard truth of the world. Maybe you had the right attitude all along."

Raven shook her head. "Don't say things like that, Beast Boy. The world's a pretty tough place, but it's not bad enough to get you down, is it?"

Beast Boy tried to smile. "Isn't it? Maybe I've just been fooling myself all along. Maybe I've just tried to be funny all the time because it makes it easier to deal with the world."

Raven shook her head. She couldn't believe that she, the Titan with by far the lowest outlook on life, was trying to convince Beast Boy, the Titan who up until now had the best outlook on life, that not everything was as messed up as it seemed. "Beast Boy, look…I know coming back to all this was hard on you…but that doesn't mean that you should give up on everything else."

Raven bit her lip when Beast Boy didn't respond. She had known Beast Boy for years, and he'd never acted this depressed before.

"Beast Boy," she said, taking his shoulder, "Stop doing this. It's not…it just isn't like you."

Beast Boy looked up at Raven's eyes. "I told you, Raven…things change."

Raven frowned. "But some things don't, Beast Boy!"

All the green skinned boy did was look away frowning.

"Beast Boy!" Raven shouted, seizing both his shoulders. "Snap out of it! Stop being such a baby!"

Beast Boy's lips curled into a snarl. "Then tell me what's left to hold onto!"

Raven pulled back. "…What?"

"Tell me," Beast Boy shook, "Tell me one thing that's worth holding onto! Everything's going to change at some point, and everything that you have…everything that you love…"

The boy hung his head looking away. Raven, for all she could do, just stared blankly. "Beast Boy…"

Beast Boy shook his head, tiredly. "Leave me alone, Raven. You've done enough."

Raven withdrew. That was it. There was no getting to him. Beast Boy really was lost. He was telling her to leave. He couldn't even stand the human contact that he'd cherished before.

Things really did change.

Raven was about to listen to him, to leave him like then, when Starfire's words came to her.

"No."

Beast Boy looked up slowly. "Raven…please…just…leave me alo-"

He was cut off when Raven suddenly threw her arms around him.

"I don't think that's what's you need," Raven said, defiantly.

Beast Boy was absolutely lost for words. "R…Raven…?"

Raven clenched her eyes. "Beast Boy…you asked me before what's worth holding onto. I honestly don't know if this is the answer you're looking for…but I will tell you what I think: This, Beast Boy. This, right here, is worth holding onto."

Raven held the boy at arms length. "You may be right, Beast Boy. Things will change, and many of the things we cherish will disappear. But I'm not willing to let you disappear too."

Raven embraced him again, this time much more caringly. "I'm willing to hold onto you Beast Boy…if you're willing to hold onto me."

Beast Boy was still lost for words. Was he dreaming, or had Raven just told him that she cared about him? Cared enough to give him something to place value in? Something to hold onto, no matter what changed?

"Raven…" Beast Boy mouthed, breathless. "Why are you…?"

Raven frowned, holding him back at arms length. "Why do you think, you big dummy? Because of who you are, Beast Boy. You're worth holding onto. I don't care if you don't think the same…but I won't let you do this to yourself."

Beast Boy was still awestruck. "Raven…I always thought…"

Raven placed a finger on his lips. "How about, instead of saying anything, you just come out of your room and join the land of the living?"

Beast Boy's mouth slowly curved into a smile. "Well…alright."

Raven got up, letting out a breath of a fresh air. Had she really just said all of that? She knew that Beast Boy was important friend, the perfect counterbalance to her moodiness. He kept her on her toes. But it was only now that she realized the value she had unconsciously been placing in him.

Raven headed out of the messy room and looked over her shoulder as Beast Boy slowly followed her. He didn't seem to be acting at all different from his old self anymore. Which was good.

And bad. Had he heard anything she'd said to him? Had he not realized that what she'd said meant that she felt something for him?

She found herself brooding over the whole thing for the rest of the day. Even as Beast Boy emerged to greet the rest of the Titans and their worried expressions, she was in the midst of self-pondering. Had he not realized that her words of condolences were more than just words?

By the end of the day, she was already angry with herself. Why had she spilled her feelings like that? Didn't she know better? Beast Boy was too dense for a message like that to get through. He just thought of her as a friend anyway. And they were so ill matched to boot. He was an out-going, fun-loving boy, and she was a withdrawn, creepy girl. What could they possibly have in common?

She found herself suddenly torn from her thoughts when Beast Boy suddenly confronted her before she was about to go off to bed.

"Hey Raven!" Beast Boy said with a smile on his face. "Thanks a lot for what you said today. It really helped."

Raven nodded, looking away. "Yeah. Sure. I'm glad I could help."

Beast Boy smiled, a sheepish look on his face. "Anyway, uh…I was wondering if…you know, if you weren't busy, we could…I don't, spend some time together tomorrow? You know, just hang out?"

Raven looked up. "Really?"

Beast Boy held his hands up. "I mean, if you're not busy or anything…or if, you know, you've got better things to-"

"I'd…love to," Raven said, sounding foolish. She was having a hard time containing herself. Love to? The very thought gave her goose bumps.

"Oh…great!" Beast Boy smiled, suddenly rushing up to her. Before she could stop him, he enveloped her in a great big hug. "Goodnight, Raven!"

Raven flushed, the sudden contact making her uneasy. "Um…Goodnight, Beast Boy…"

Raven still felt uneasy, even as she watched Beast Boy run down the hall towards his room. For some reason, she just couldn't stop blushing. It was just Beast Boy, why was she getting so worked up? Why did she enjoy it so much when he hugged her? Even as she was getting ready for bed and had settled in for the night, she still kept thinking back to the thought of returning his warm embrace.

Maybe some things changed for the better after all.