Hey all you human life-forms! This is kinda like a sequel to 25 Things Harry Potter Isn't Allowed To Do. Yep, the leprechauns are back. Oh, and I have told you a million times- My noble self do not owneth. Thou shall not sue-eth.
1. Ask him why he doesn't have such an awesome scar.
2. Tell him trying to take over the world was so five minutes ago.
3. Buy him fake tan for his birthday; that pasty colour just isn't working for him.
4. Steal his red contacts and let him walk around with baby blue eyes.
5. Talk about how cool Harry Potter is in front of him.
6. Ask him why he doesn't have a hot redhead for a sidekick- sleazy blondes like Malfoy and psycho brunette chicks like Bella just aren't the same.
7. Tell him pink is the new black and buy him floral-printed robes- burn all other robes.
8. Tell him its okay to cry because Harry Potter just won't die; Harry obviously has some awesome power, it shouldn't get him down!
9. Call him "Mouldyshorts" when you're pissed off with him.
10. Bring in fairy bread and cordial to his Death Eater meetings- growing boys deserve some sweets!
11. Replace his wand with a fake one, courtesy of Weasley Wizarding Wheezes, then drag out Harry to face him; watch Voldie try and curse The-Boy-Who-Just-Won't-Sodding-Die now!
12. Chat to his Death Nibblers about his 'feelings'.
13. Sing "Sunshine and Lollipops" every morning.
14. Replace all Death Eater hats and masks with fake crowns, party hats, and fairy masks.
15. Bring out Mr. Twinkles during his Death Eater meetings- see him torn between keeping his macho look up, and hugging his favourite teddy.
16. Decorate his bedroom with red and gold colours- watch his left eye twitch.
17. Introduce him to who knew there was so many different ways for him to have a torrid affair with Lucius Malfoy?
18. Take him to Disneyland- see him become claustrophobic at all the Muggle children surrounding him.
19. Feed Wormtail to Nagini- he'll get upset cause Nagini might get indigestion.
20. Fill his mansion with pictures of Dumbledore and charm them to speak- watch Voldie have heart palpitations.
21. Whenever you see him, say, "Oh My Lord, so they are loose!"
22. Ask him if he's secretly crushing on Harry Potter; were all the death plots just to get his attention?
23. Whenever you're near him say, "When were they given the right to procreate? Honestly, we can all see what happens!"
24. Tape his moans throughout the night- who knew he had nightmares about man-eating turtles who like to throw onions at camels?
25. Throw a Wiggles party for him. Or, better yet, a Harry Potter Costume Party. Oh, the possibilities…..