How do I start this thing out?...Well, my names Kaley. I'm 14 and I love to write. I still have alot to learn though. I had no idea there was actually a site where writers could publish there work. It's great! I started writing this story about a month ago. It's set in from Judes perspective. For me, it's funner to write from First-Person than Third-Person, Third-Person Narrative, etc.

I'm not totally sure how long this story will be. If it completely sucks to you guys then I'll just call it a one-shot and be done with it. Try something else, something new. Again, I'm not sure how it will all work out.

I just recently heard "How Strong Do You Think I Am" and "Over-Rated" from the new album (set to release March 21 in the States I think). And I have to say, "Over-Rated" doesn't accent Jude's character at all. It's way to pop, cliche for my taste. But, "How Strong Do You Think I Am" rocks. In my opinion. Judging by the lyrics I think the song might possibly be foreshadowing some dramatic events that will happen between Jude and Tommy?

Moving on. Lately I've been glued to the computer. I've spent so much time on here that I think I actually have developedsoars on my legs from the computer chair. The-N site is where I have been spending most of my time. Taking all those quizzes. My results are as fallows; My IS boyfriend is Speed. My IS song is "Let Me Fall" (I'd prefer Skin, Your Eyes, or Criminal, not to be to picky). My true hair color is brunette. I find this quite funny.My real hair color is more of an ash/sandy blonde. Numerous times have I tried to dye it brown and it never turns out right which just peeves me off even more. I give up. And last but not least, the IS character that I am most like is Sadie. I had to blink about 4 times when I saw these results. I'm nowhere near posessing the qualities and characteristics of Sadie Harrison. But, in reality, it's really dumb and very, very lame to go on and on about this subject seeing as how it's just some silly internet test. Has anyone else taken any of these?

Wow, I didn't expect to ramble on and onin this author's note. Sorry. I'm going to stop now and let you all get on with the story. I hope it's somewhere near being worthy of reading. Oh! Almost forgot! I don't own any IS characters, there songs, and much to my dismay, Tim Rozon.

The music world can somewhat be described as a winding, endless river. You have your over-bearing boss who's personality is about as lifeless as the rocks and pebbles that adorn the sandy banks. The protective and supportive producer who represents the clear, blue water that flows peacefully down it's designated course. Shielding the tiny marine life that inhabits the world underneath. Obviously the adoring fans who exemplify this small creation. They hover just above the surface, waiting, sinking into security. Then, when they spot there prey, they attack it with big signs of admiration, chanting marriage proposals, and tugging at your clothing with eager hands.

Rivers arn't always peaceful and serene though. There's the current, which seems to have a life all on it's own, that washes over you and all you can do is pray you don't get sucked down. And right now, my only hope of survival on this river of life is hoping that my head stays afloat and that I don't get swept away in my uptight current of society.

"Jude, we got it" Tommy spoke into his over-sized studio microphone. If theres one thing you should know about Tom Quincy it's that his brain works overtime 24/7. He's always thinking outside the box. And I mean way beyond the four corners. His macho method of assumption is what I find most attractive about him. Which isn't a good thing seeing as how I shouldn't be finding anything attractive about the man. I'm the girl who's supposed to be shouting, "Ew! Gross! He's a 23 year old perv!"

I never result to sinking down to that level of insecurity and I never will. It doesn't matter what life teaches you. May it be your teachers, parents, or some other "Adult who you should look up to" that encourages it. In this world everyone's the same. Your supposed to fallow the in-crowd, be like them. Your taught to fallow all the rules by exact directions. But what if the ball's in your court? What are you supposed to do then? Throw it back and just restart the useless cycle of the game.

Everytime I get compared to my peers, I can't help but crack up. Theres something funny to me about being compared and contrasted to other people. I'm not like other people. I don't wish to be.

"Oh, ok" I said, exiting the sound booth. Lately I havn't been saying much. Living off 4 hours of sleep a night and a knock-off brand of an energy drink from the local Eezy Mart isn't exactly high class. As Darius puts it, "I'm very displeased with your choice of lack of sleep, thus I can now fully understand why you've been slacking.This is disappointing and unacceptable for one of my top artist." I couldn't understand wheather to take this as a compliment or just another annoying complaint. Either way, you can shove it up your ass D and bite your tongue. I've lost my voice. My opinions gone missing.

"I think we got it this time, girl" Tommy said, grabbing my foot which was propped up on the soundboard. My train of thought always interferes with my mouth. Resulting in a massive collision of words.

"Bite your tongue!" I shouted out randomly. This whole situation became very awkward. I sounded like some sick dominatrix shouting off a sexual command. Not that I would mind having sex with Tommy. I'm sure it wouldn't be that bad. Now that I think about it, I bet he's really good. I mean he has to be if he can keep girls dangling at the end of his rope for months at a time.

He most likely never returns there phone calls though. The ass. His brain (like all other males) focuses around one thing. I know this because I've caught him stairing at my chest many times when I'm in some slinky costume for some performance that makes me look like a prostitute. For example, last years "Super Star Satellite!" It's quite amusing. Next time I'll make it a point to flaunt them in his face so he can see what he can't have and make him regret throwing me away when I was sixteen.

I know what your thinking. I said I didn't sink down to that level, ever. But this is different. I'm not calling Tom a perverted pedifile, I'm just making him feel like one.

The facial expressions of the opposite sex is one of life's little mysteries. Where did the arched eyebrow, mouth open, pale faced characeristic originate. That's something that will keep you pondering for hours. The ancestors of many males were 100 percent exactly like them (Biology class, third period, Mr. Call). This is why most thoeries of "Are All Men the Same?" can be proved factual. Maybe I'll become a scientist one day. I'm capable of thinking outside the box just as much as Tommy is.

My hand immediately flew up to hide my eyes. If they weren't hidden by my dry palm, I would have started laughing. Just staring at Tom's questioning and very confused face.

"I'm sorry" I mumbled. Whenever I apologize, for any situation, I end up sounding like a little 5 year old who just broke his mother's favorite figurine. Figuratively speaking of course. I was never good at apologizing. When I was younger I was really stubborn. I'd spend hours sitting up in my room because I refused to apologize to Sadie for hitting her in the head with my plastic toy microphone. I would bite her then scramble up the stairs before I got spanked. I look back on those memories now and think, "How come Sadie never got in trouble?" She never got into trouble! Of any sort. Sadie was there little princess while I was the forgotten henchman who got pushed around and stood in the background of fairy tale land.

Sadie is the type of person who'll spend hours and hours and hours perfecting her appearance just to go to the gas station down the street. "You never know who might be there" she says. Oh, I know. I always pray that some physco killer will be there and take her hostage. Or that she gets abducted by aliens on the way out of the convenient store. I can dream can't I. We'll get back to Sadie later. I could go on forever on the many reasons of why I wish I was born an only child. Or for that matter, why I wish I was at least first born.

"I'd suggest you lay back on the soft drinks, Jude" Tommy said. I watched his eyebrow take it's former shape. His face relaxed.

"Yeah, I will" I muttered. I used to think I liked to be center of attention. I do sometimes. When an embaressing position comes into play I manage to totally make myself look like a moron. Those are the times I don't like to be dead center and sink back into seclusion.

"Your free to go home. We got what we needed for today" he smiled soflty towards me. He has a way of making me feel safe and happy at the same time. I love that feeling.

"Uh, Sadie's home this weekend and mom and dad are getting into melt down mode" I replied.

Mom and Dad stayed together even after he cheated on her. Sadie was thrilled! I was pissed. How can you take someone back into your home and continue to love them after they do something like that. Even if he is my father, I hate him. I hate everything he is and everthing he represents. He represents scum. He's worthless, cheating, lieing scum. The truth hurts daddy dearest. I don't think I'll ever be able to forgive him. And the more he tries to push his way into my life the more I resisist and throw him back out.

My mom begs me to try harder. She says things will be easier once I move away from the past and look ahead. Look ahead to what? Theres nothing. I shall be a pigeon in a flock of flamingos. Forever.

"What are you saying? Your not going to go home?" Tommy asked me.

Good thinking Tom. That's exactly what I'm going to do. Or should I say not going to do. I'm not going to go home tonight. I'll stay here, in the studio. The place that is more like a home to me than my real household of chaos.

"Precisely, I'll just sleep on the lobby couch tonight" I said, standing and stretching.

He stood as well and smoothed out his clothes. "You can't do that. Darius is already irritated by your performance lately. You don't want to provoke him any further" Tommy said rationally.

I hate it when he's right. It annoys the crap out of me. Darius would throw a tantrum if he came in tomorrow morning and found me strewn across the floor of the studio. Theres no other alternative. I guess I'll just go home and deal with my dysfunctional family for yet another night.

I exhaled very slowly. "Fine, but if tomorrow you see my name in the obituaries...please make sure my parents do not come tomy funeral."

He thought this was funny. This isn't funny. Not a laughing matter Tom! I'm dead serious.

"Ok superstar, I promise" he replied sarcastically. He always thinks I'm joking. I swear, no one takes me seriously.

I stared at him for a minute with my mouth agape looking like I was trying to make out with the air. "letsjusgo" I said quickly in a jumble of words.

"After you" he said, swinging his hand through the air and gesturing towards the door. What a gentleman...sorta, in his own very different, unique way.

I walked through the doors, thinking, if I can't get him to take me seriously by saying one statement, how am I going to convince him that I love him.